Note: la la la la la la... *dances around life-sized Roy trophy*
now, enjoy rest of story.
Five figures dashed through the halls in shopping carts. DK, the leader, hit a flight of stairs and tumbled down them, with Bowser, Gannondorf, Yoshi, and MGAW closely following. The shopping carts assaulted the pig pile afterwards, hurting Yoshi the most.
"OWWWWIEEE!!!" he screeched, nursing his sore tail.
Gannondorf patted Yoshi on the back. "No worries, my friend. Weeee!" Obviously, Ganny had sucked on Marth's bong a little bit longer than he should have.
"Yeah, weeeeeeeeee!" the rest chorused, dancing and wiggling in the girl's end of the mansion. Sheik flitted down the hall, saw the dancing idiots, and decided to join in.
"Weeeeeeeeee!" Sheik yelled, twirling and giggling. She took MGAW's hand and they spun around until a wall interfered. "Well, did you guys get a smoke from Marth's bong or what?"
"Yeeeaaaahhh!!" Pichu tittered "It's funny!"
Zelda also ambled down the hall. "What the-?" MGAW wondered, seeing that both Sheik and Zelda were separate.
"We have to be two different people," Shiek explained. "The hand guy says so."
"Riiiiight..." MGAW winked.
Link and Samus entered the main lounge room at the exact same time from the two different doors. Blinking at Link, Samus sighed. "Coincidence?"
"Yeah... I guess." Link plopped himself down on a couch nearby. Samus, sensing something wrong in the perfect balance of Link, dropped herself down next to him.
"What's up?"
"Just wondering why we're here."
"Oh, boy. He's depressed," Samus thought. "Because, you know... life needs some variety, not always saving somebody."
Link sighed and mumbled something. "I've got plenty of experience in that."
Samus rubbed his thigh. "Me too."
"Couldn't they find someone else to save humanity?" Link grunted.
Samus thought about that. "Yeah, I mean, when that dumb computer tells me to do something, I do it. We're doormats!"
Muttering, Link nodded his head in agreement. "Why us, right Sam?"
"Yup. There are other bounty hunters out there, why not give me a break?"
Suddenly, three different Foxes rushed through the door. Samus stood up.
"What the hell?" she asked. A Fox in an orange shirt stepped up to her.
"Please, follow me, young lass," he told her with a profuse Irish accent, grabbing her hand.
Link, Samus, and the Foxes sped out to the Great Fox. The orange-shirted one led them inside it. A heavy marijuana smell filled it, as Peppy had a fat joint to suck on. Falco drooled all over the control center-place-thingy, for he'd fallen asleep. Over in the corner helium balloons surrounded Slippy, as he inhaled from them to make his voice stay high-pitched. A Fox commanded Peppy to stop smoking and Falco to wake up... in Japanese.
The rabbit and bird shot him at the exact same time. He fell in a bloody heap on the floor and Slippy angrily grumbled as he cleaned up the mess.
"What the fuck?" Link asked.
Another Fox stumbled out of a closet. "Hey, what'd I miss?" he asked w/o an accent. The Irish Fox screamed something indistinctly and looked insulted as the other Fox giggled at him. Samus and Link, both utterly clueless, stepped forward.
"Well," Samus cooed, leaning toward the accent-less Fox, "who are they, my little pet?"
"Clones," Fox answered simply. "We've all got four. Mine just change their accents every five seconds, so ya know." Fox winked at Samus, and she nearly pissed herself with delight.
"Cool. So where are they?" Link inquired.
"I'll show you. Follow me!" Fox ordered. After kicking Falco in the ass, he ran out before the bird could slaughter him, Samus and Link trying to keep up(hey, Fox is friggin' fast! I'd say they'd be jes dieing by his fastness!!).
Wherever the Hell the clones were, everyone(yes including the panting, sore, tired, disgusted-at-Fox-b/c-he's-so-fast Samus and Link) had gathered around this weirdo-looking thingamabob. Out of it stepped a beautiful pink Yoshi. Normal Yoshi suddenly forgot about his throbbing tail long enough to gape for at least five minutes.
"Hey, Handsome," Pink Yoshi sighed sexily, "what are you doing today?"
"N-n-nothing," Yoshi stuttered.
"Good. I've got just the thing for you, Handsome." Pink Yoshi soon was hanging all over Yoshi, to everyone's disgust.
"Erm, yes, now, the Sheik/Zelda clones," Master Hand declared. A whole bunch of Sheiks and Zeldas struggled out.
Marth nudged Roy w/ his elbow. "Man, Sheik's hot!" Roy checked out Sheik.
"Nah, not really," he disagreed. "She walks too weird."
"Look, when she walks, her ass shakes," Marth pointed out, gazing intently at Sheik's butt.
"Now, Roy's and Marth's clones," Crazy Hand announced. Roy and Marth immediately stopped examining Sheik and watched the door of the thingie. A Roy dressed in red strolled out. Many more Marths and Roys(boooo-yeah!!!!) followed him. A Marth clad in green started speaking quickly in Japanese. A Roy argued back in Japanese. The original Roy and Marth, who happened to know every word of Japanese they were speaking/yelling, translated what they were saying.
"You BAKA! I can't believe you told "The Man" about my problem!"
"Well what the Hell ever!! It was Roy Number 4!"
"Was not!!! No, wait... uhh, I mean it wasn't!!"
*Random Roy draws sword* "Duel!! Marth and me Number three!!"
"Hey! Chicken butt!"
"Duck butt!"
*pause* "There's no duck butt you BAKA!!! Now I'll duel you!!"
*the real Roy steps up and speaks Japanese to all of them.* *everyone stares and the real Marth falls on the ground and guffaws his ass off*
"What did he say?" Gannondorf asked Marth.
"I said they were all a bunch of BAKAs and stop saying BAKA b/c it's offensive," Roy said.
*Gannondorf stares* "I don't get it."
Later, around the dinnah table(mmmmm yummy yummy food!!!!!), Bowser roasted his "duck butt" w/ his fire breath.
"You, like, totally need a Tic-Tac," Nana told him, reaching for more duck butt. *Bowser's eyes fill w/ tears*
"I can't help it! I'm emotionally frail, so please don't insult me anymore, Nana," Bowser pleaded, staring at her through tear-filled puppy dog eyes.
*all conversations cease as everyone gazes at Bowser* Cheeks turned red from embarrassment, Nana sunk into her chair. Kirby asked, suddenly, about the duck butt. "Why the Hell are we eating duck butt?"
*a Roy dressed in green and a Marth clad in black walk out of the kitchen and speak Japanese* Falco, Fox, Sheik, Roy, and Marth all stare at them for a split second before thinking about what they said.
"That is stupid," Sheik blurted quietly.
*Japanese Roy responds w/ gibberish: "Watashi wa shizuka hiru! Gisei Roy wa taka yon ga goshujin no essen ..heh"*
"What?! You sacrificed Roy number 4 for our meal?! And.... you're a quiet duck? *O_o*," Falco inquired, sickened.
*Japanese Roy and Marth stare blankly* *Falco rolls his eyes and translates his questions for them* "So? Did you?" Fox wanted to know.
"Do what?" Gannondorf wondered aloud.
"I'm not a cannibal!! Sheik roared unexpectedly and began to walk off.
"Teiryuu!" Jap Roy screamed. "Hiroimono yo hiru!"
"Sure!" Sheik still walks off... man the kitchen must be pretty big.. if it takes her that freaking long to get across it then WA! *Jap Roy dashes over to her and pulls her into the part of the kitchen where food is cooked* Minutes later, Jap Roy came speeding out of the kitchen, Sheik closely following w/ a 12-inch long carving knife. "How do you say 'asshole' in Japanese?"
After dinner, all the smashers were in the main lounge room. Sheik, Zelda, Samus, and Peach all played Utada Hikaru songs in Japanese and tried to sing along, even though Sheik was the only one who could actually sing 'Colors' w/o messing up(you try that!! that song is freakin HARD!!). Nana crept here and there, examining everyone in his or her activities. All the others were high. Ness and Popo danced w/ each other, tripping and falling over everything, including people. Marth bitched to Roy about how he sounded like a girl, MGAW burned random things, and Master Hand prepared to make an announcement.
*Ahem* "May I have your attention please?" he asked in a declaring type of voice. "Tomorrow night we have decided to have a formal dance. I know that you may not know each other very well, but please ask someone to go w/ you. Also, some of you have visitors." *a bunch of people walk out of a closet* "Now, reunite, or..... do..... whatever."
Luigi and Mario found themselves w/o any friends. Luigi, in his unnaturally high voice and Italian accent, sounded positively hilarious when he sat in the corner to put his sadness into unsuccessful sit-ups, encouraging himself to "keep up the good work." *O_o* Anyway, Nana and Popo only had terrible news that the polar bears had to be their friends forever. Both were dragged away screaming. All of the people from the Legend of Zelda had tons of friends, b/c heh, LoZ rocks. Grown-up Malon(or Cremia in MM), Naboru or whatever her name is, Gannondorf, Link, and Zelda all crowded about in a circle, sharing tidbits of info about stuff. Ostracized, Impa sagged over to the circle of Young Malon, Romani(BTW, even tho they're the same person, I need more girls in the story, pplz!!), Saria, and Y'Link, where she became even more left out. Fox and Krystal were arguing about something, maybe it was Krystal's gigantic purse she'd bought at a yard sale, or perhaps the sluttish clothes she wore, and she looked like a hooker-fox-thing fresh from a corner of LA. Impa, having been the snoop that no one liked, scoped out every conversation, taking mental notes and examinations, like how the whore from FE6 seemed to be REALLY coming on to Roy(can we blame her??), and how Romani gazed at Y'Link w/ a love struck twinkle in her eyes.
"This is soooooo good," Impa told herself after the reunion was over. "Soooooo good...."
Later that night, Bowser waited outside Ganondorf's dorm that he shared w/ Pikachu. "I'm gonna confess my feelings to him," Bowser told himself, contemplating exactly how to do it.
Mewtwo, floating by, spotted him talking to himself. "Freak. Even I don't talk to myself, and I'm psychic!" he commented snottily.
"Shut up, no one asked you!" Bowser roared back, stifling tears.
The really nasty-looking elf known as Impa snuck down the hall, in her Sherlock Holmes outfit, and wrote down some things in her notebook. "I see Bowser wants to do something... what could he be doing outside Ganny's dorm, hmm?" she asked Mewtwo. *Mewtwo shrugs*
"I dunno," the evil Pokèmon answered truthfully.
"None of your business what I'm doing! If I wanna make a late-night visit to my friend Ganny then that should be fine w/ everyone and very unsuspicious!! Now fuck off!" Bowser growled at them. *Impa writes eagerly in her notebook*
Peach brooded in the Pokè floats stage, on Squirtle's arm. "Life sucks," she muttered through tears. "Really freaking sucks." Ok, lemme give you the scoop on Peach's mood: Mario dumped her for MGAW, Samus tripped her and she fell down three flights of stairs, Impa cornered her w/ questions about her love life, and, to top it all off, Daisy beat her in a loser-out tournament. So life really DID suck for her then. Suddenly, as if sent by Din herself, Link strolled over.
"Hey," he said, plopping himself down beside her. "What's up?"
"My life is bad. I wish I'd never agreed to doing this. I-"
"Hey, it ain't so bad. We have food and new clothes, right?" Link comforted her, wrapping a strong arm about her tiny waist.
Peach wiped her tears. "Well, that is sort of true. Could you stay with me? I need someone to talk to."
"Sure," Link agreed, tightening his grip on her.
longest chappy yet!!! *claps* well now i must get on to chappy seven!!! Good-bye!! *disappears in a cloud*