Dismal Angel 2010 - Episode 21

Chapter 5: Fuck, Fuck, Fuck

Kitty waited that night for Remy to return, but time had gone by and he had not arrived back yet – however, Piotr had. She kept a watch from the hall window to see the garage, Piotr had borrowed one of the professor's many cars that were shared amongst the X-Men for general use. Kitty watched Illyana run on into the mansion ahead of Piotr in a happy skip, and she headed down the stairs, Illyana passed by her.

"Good night, Miss Pryde," Illyana said, obviously she was heading up to bed, it was ten pm.

"Night, Illyana," Kitty said distractedly, she continued down the stairs, and she watched Piotr step in. Piotr raised her head to see her five steps from the bottom, his eyes met hers and they were silent.

Piotr took his jacket off and hung it on the coat rack, he looked away from her, his expression sullen and unhappy.

"Hey…" Kitty said softly.

Piotr nodded in acknowledgement but said nothing.

"I've been waiting for you to come home…" Kitty explained, "I…really need to talk to you…"

"I really have nothing to say to you," Piotr remarked, colder than Kitty thought suited his voice.

Kitty felt the sting of his words, "Fine, then just listen…"

Piotr paused, "fine, I shall lend you my ears for a moment, but if I do not wish to hear I may walk away," he frowned.

Kitty folded her arms, "fine…" she murmured, "it's like this…me and Remy are absolutely NOT sleeping together. I don't even like him that way. Sure he's cute, who can deny it, but…no…we are not – DEFINITELY NOT – having sex."

Piotr looked away, "How can I believe you, I SAW you leaving his room."

"Yeah, at four am, so what?" Kitty shrugged, "am I not allowed to talk with a man past midnight or something? Is this some kind of RULE you made when I wasn't paying attention? Thou shall not have male friends, Thou shall not spend a minute past midnight talking to Remy LeBeau?!" she demanded.

"I do NOT mind you having male friends, Kitty," Piotr said, perhaps a little too loudly, for his voice seemed to echo over the entire foyer. "It is HIM I mind. Need I remind you who Remy LeBeau is?"

"I don't get it…what's the problem."

"Kitty, I can put up with spending time with him, but he is no friend of mines…and every woman he sees, he has. He has never spent time with a woman innocently in his life."

"You have SO got him wrong," Kitty said, "so what if he's had a bit of a wandering eye in the past, he doesn't now, he is DEDICATED to Rogue. And he is NOTHING more than my friend."

"A man like Remy does not spend so much time with a woman unless he expects something out of it. The man wants to have sex with you, and he will have you the same way he has every other woman he has known."

"That's so not true," Kitty gestured wildly, "if he WANTED me, he COULD have had me months ago!"

Piotr's expression changed to one of utter confusion, "what are you saying?"

"Look, there was this ONE time, in Illinois, I was there with Remy, in his apartment, I stayed with him a few days while I was arranging my parents funeral. One night, I don't know what got into me, but I went to hug him…and I ended up kissing him – I don't know, maybe it was grief or something, I just DON'T KNOW. But it was HIM who pushed me way."

Piotr fell silent for several moments.

"Now, if he was the sleaze you think he is, why didn't he just take total advantage right there and then? It's not like I would have put up a fight."

"Kitty…"

Kitty turned, Remy had come through the door, she hadn't even heard him, she'd been so caught up in her explanation to him.

Remy looked drunk, his eyes slightly glassy, "perhaps you shouldn't say much more…" he suggested in a slur, he staggered a little. "Piotr, she's not lyin', okay? I NEVER slept with her. Not once, not once in the nine years I've known the woman."

"You're drunk…" Kitty rushed to Remy.

"You rush to him – it is obvious you HAVE feelings for this man!" Piotr bellowed.

"He's my friend," Kitty frowned, "I'd do anything for my friends, you know that."

Remy pushed Kitty away a little, "you got a problem with me?" he asked of Colossus, "Jealousy?! Mistrust?! Or is it simply that you fear I have a better relationship with your girlfriend than you do?!"

Kitty grabbed a hold of Remy's arm, Remy had taken one step too close to Piotr, and Piotr did not look happy, "Remy, don't…" she said.

"Why not?!" Remy turned and looked at him, "I've been listenin' at the door, he's been makin' comments about my past, which is fine. But who the hell is he to accuse?!" Remy demanded, "he isn't exactly a saint himself, you know," he reminded, "HE was an Acolyte too – damn longer than I was."

"That was the past," Piotr growled.

"My point exactly," Remy spat, "just because I've been a bad person in the past, just because I've been less than gentlemanly with most women I knew throughout my life does NOT mean I can't keep my hands to myself when it concerns my friends AND the girlfriends, fiancées and wives of others. I changed the moment I fell in love…I love ONLY one woman – or have you forgotten?"

"You love only yourself," Piotr uttered.

Kitty gaped, "shut up!" she hissed at Piotr.

Remy shook his head and turned his back on the man, heading towards the stairs, "I have no love for myself," he said. "If I did I would not waste my breath on you trying to convince you that I did not sleep with your girl. Now if you'll excuse me…" he disappeared up the stairs.

Kitty frowned at Piotr, "you have no tact, do you?! He has a mental illness you…stupid…big…OX!" she kicked his leg hard, although she doubted he felt it. "He's my friend you stupid…" she trailed off then let out a howl of frustration, "GOD, why am I even talking to you right now?!" she demanded, "every word I say seems to go upon deaf ears, you don't even want to LISTEN. How many more times must I state I did NOT sleep with Remy?! Why the fuck would I want to jeopardise what I have with you?! I'm in LOVE with you, you…you…you…stupid…dolt!"

Piotr looked at her, "love?" he asked incredulously.

"Yes!" Kitty gasped angrily, "LOVE. As in I LOVE YOU," she frowned, "as in I can't get enough of you, as in I can't imagine my life without you, as in I have NEVER felt this much love for ANYONE in my life…" she replied, "And as much as I love you, you're still a stupid…fucking…dolt."

Piotr fell silent after this, then some several moments later, he said softly, "I am in love with you, too."

"Now that we've like, ruined the perfect moment to tell each other we're in love with each other…" Kitty said, calming down a little, "Are we done fighting about this or what? 'Cause like, I need to apologise to Remy about the way YOU behaved towards him."

"I…I…think we are done."

"Fine," Kitty remarked coldly, "I'll talk to you later," she added, and began up the stairs. Inside, her heart was beating furiously, and her blood was boiling. She found herself pondering if this might be the mood swings she'd heard about that could happen during pregnancy, although she'd never expected it quite as soon as this. By the time she'd gotten to Remy's room, she felt like crying, and in a fit of emotion, she phased through the door, much to a surprised Remy, and fell into his arms in tears.

"What's wrong?" Remy asked in confusion, he'd barely gotten his jacket off before the woman had barged in.

"Piotr just told me he loved me…" Kitty sobbed hysterically.

"The bastard. How cruel. You want me to blow his head off?"

Kitty moved away and shoved him, "you don't GET it…I said it too…" she fell to his bed in torrents of tears, sobbing into his pillow.

"What don't I get? You love him, he loves you, sounds perfect to me…sounds like if you said you love each other you've made up…" he staggered over to the closet to hang his jacket inside.

Kitty leaned up, her face wet, "But now it's SERIOUS. We've said the L word, you stupid Cajun!" she cried at him, "now if I tell him I'm pregnant…it's going to get worse…he'll hate me, he'll dump me…he'll go back to Russia…!!"

Remy sighed, "why are you yelling at me?"

"I don't know…" Kitty put her hands to her face as she sat up on her knees, "I think I'm having a nervous breakdown or something…" she sobbed.

"It's not a nervous breakdown until you've at least thrown something," Remy joked softly.

Kitty reached over, grabbed the digital alarm clock from the bedside cabinet, yanked the plug right out of the wall and threw it at him, "there, are you fucking happy?!" she demanded.

Remy dodged the alarm and it hit the wall, breaking into several pieces that fell to the carpet. "Uhm…did I do something wrong?"

"Yes!" Kitty yelled, "You weren't here to talk to him like you said you would! You came in drunk and he still didn't believe you, and I don't even know if he believes me even though he SAYS he loves me!"

"None of this is MY fault," Remy reminded, "YOU were the one who was in my room at 4am waiting for me…"

"Oh so now this is MY fault!?!" Kitty demanded.

"I didn't SAY that, don't put words in my mouth, okay?" he demanded.

"But that's what you were thinking! My fault that I got pregnant, my fault that I got caught coming out of your room, MY FAULT that I can't deal with my boyfriend the way I'd like!" she yelled.

"Oh, so now you're a telepath are you?" he demanded coldly in a slur.

"I might as well be," Kitty uttered, "go to hell, Remy. God I can't BELIEVE I came here to APOLOGISE to you for what happened!" she made way for the door.

Remy watched her leave and slam the door behind herself. Quietly to himself, he whispered, "fuck," and shook his head at himself. "Fuck, fuck, fuck."