DISCLAIMER: I don't own Hagane no Renkinjutsushi/Hagaren/Fullmetal Alchemist, which is owned by Hiromu Arakawa. If I did own it, then I'd already have Roy and Ed sprawled out on Roy's desk.
WARNING: shounen-ai. Yaoi. Whatever. Includes making out scenes. If the pairing RoyEd/EdRoy disturbs you, then you better not read it. Oh, and lots of grammar errors. .
"Yes, this is the East Head Quarter. How may we help you?"
"Ankle. Sugar. Oliver. Eight. Zero. Zero. This is Brigadier Hughes calling from Central," the emerald eyed family man leaned against the side of the phone booth, grinning while holding couple of pictures in his other hand. He was on a lunch break, so after he ate lunch with the military crew, he went out, having to have at least 30 minutes to buy his daughter some candies and call to annoy his friend. "I'd like to speak to his Excellency, Fuhrer, if he's not busy."
Sure, Roy was supposed to be at the Central since he was now the Fuhrer, but he placed his office in the East Head Quarter, the safest of the all. After all, Roy did have a lot of enemies at the Central, due to his sudden promotion to the position Fuhrer from colonel after the previous one was killed by the Elric brothers when they were fighting against the Homunculi.
"The code's confirmed. Please wait for a moment."
-
Stifled sighs, moans, whimpers came from the closed part of the office, but they were still soft enough to be not noticed by the crew behind the door. The only way the crew was going to hear them was if they pressed their ears against the door. Ed sighed from his position on the Roy's desk, obviously enjoying the attention the Fuhrer-turned-colonel was giving him, even though he was straddling his superior. There was a content silence between them, only the mentioned sounds available between them.
Ed was only wearing his black tank-top, but Roy wasn't. Roy had his military uniform top off, sure, but he still had the little white button-up shirt underneath, even though it was crumpled, due to Ed's hands, both auto-mail and the human ones, trailing up and down his chest and thigh while they were doing...whatever they were doing.
Then came the shrill, loud rings from the phone on the Fuhrer's desk, breaking the content silence, to both teen and man's annoyance. Roy grunted and sat up carefully with Ed still straddling his hips, to answer the damned phone while supporting himself with his right arm, having to have the receiver in his left hand.
"Fuhrer Roy Mustang," Roy answered with a crisp and cool tone, his feelings currently carefully restrained as Ed decided to lean up to nibble at his earlobe playfully to pass the time while he was on the phone.
"Brigadier Hughes from Central requested a talk with you," the equally crisp and cool female tone answered.
"Again?" Roy felt his eyebrow twitch as Ed detached himself from his earlobe to confusedly look up at him before giving a knowing look and trailing up his jaw line. Roy had to stifle a groan when he felt Ed nipping then soothing his skin by licking, but managed a clean and crispy answer. "Tell him to wait a moment, will you?"
"Hai," the line went off for now, and Roy set down the receiver next to them to roughly kiss the boy in his lap impatiently. The tongue slipped into the blonde's mouth easily, earning a groan and a shift to get into more comfortable position from the boy. The older Elric whimpered when he felt Roy's teeth press slightly against his bottom lips, and Roy responded with a stifled groan. Having to have a breathing problem after a while, Ed broke off the kiss, a thin line of saliva trailing between their lips before it snapped in mid air.
"You know," Ed purred, shifting to get closer to the dark haired Fuhrer-turned-colonel"We're going to get caught if we keep on doing this in your office."
-
"The Fuhrer requests that you wait for him for a while."
Hughes groaned, slapping his palm on his forehead. He only had 10 minutes to brag about Alicia on the phone just to annoy the Fuhrer. "It's an emergency. It's now or never. Can you reconnect his Excellency?" Sure, it was a lie, but then he wanted to annoy Mustang, since annoying the Fuhrer-turned-colonel always made his day brighter, even though the Mustang's crew, like Hawkeye and Havoc, disagreed. They didn't like a cranky Mustang.
"Said and done. Reconnecting," the voice ended with a click. After couple seconds of reconnecting, instead of hearing the usual annoyed voice of the Fuhrer's, he heard noises. Hughes pressed his ears tighter against the receiver, listening intently, as the sounds got slightly louder. It seemed like...clothes rustling. Then he froze when he heard a ragged groan, and some more rustling.
Then he heard a whimper; the voice was familiar, but he couldn't just remember whose it was. A groan answered the previous whimper, and Hughes wondered what Roy was doing in his office. Fuhrer Mustang making out with a girl seemed like a best option, but Hughes knew that Roy was still at work. Roy never went out to eat lunch. Most of his dates were at night, so sometimes he ate dinner outside. But never lunch.
There has been a gasp of breath, and a wet sound, as two voices breathed deeply to regain their breaths. One of them was Roy, no doubting that, judging by the deep tone added to the raspy breath. The other one he wasn't able to find out. The voice sounded like somewhere in the middle of the male and female's voice tone. If only he found whose voice belonged to the second one...
"You know," a voice that was not Roy's purred seductively, and more rustlings of clothes followed, "We're going to get caught if we keep on doing this in your office."
Damn the sound quality of the phone, Hughes cursed in his head, for his curiosity has spiked to its limits, and for he still couldn't figure out who the second person was. He was sure that the other one was a military woman, the only ones who had permission to get to Fuhrer Mustang during his work time.
"You mean making out with me?" Roy purred seductively back at the other voice, which Hughes almost jumped and screamed like a girl at the sound of the Fuhrer's voice. It was husky, needy, lusty, low, and considered as sexy and seductive, if he, Maes Hughes, himself was a girl. "You didn't mind it when we started with this whole 'making out in the Fuhrer's office' thing."
"But I didn't know it'd drag this long," the other voice whined, grunting slightly when there was a slight sound of skin and skin meeting; more rustlings came, "Have heart, Mustang. I'm young, I'm impatient, and I don't want my reputation ruined when people find out that I'm making out with my superior."
So Roy's the lucky girl's superior, heh? Hughes added to his mental suspicion list, below the "Has voice of a bi." He swore that the voice was awfully familiar, except that he couldn't put his fingers on it. Hughes shuffled around a bit to get a more comfortable position, Alicia's pictures in his hand now back safely in between his little black phone book.
"You think I'd let you go after you jumped on me a month ago," Roy chuckled on the other side of the phone, and again, Hughes had to slap his hand over his mouth to prevent himself from screaming like a girl at the sound, mentally adding "one month being together" to his mental list, "Never. You know me better than that."
A very un-lady-like snort replied. "You were the one who shamelessly flirted with me ever since Day 1, Fuhrer. Now that I think about it," there was a pause, so Hughes assumed that she was shivering while adding "Mustang made a first move on her" to his growing list. "It's gross. I'm a little less than half your age-" Hughes added the girl's age on his list"-and you still attempted to flirt with me. Gee, Fuhrer. I didn't realize that you're such a sick-minded pedophile."
Hughes stifled a strangled snort, almost seeing Roy's face expression; probably twitching his eyebrow, too. To his surprise, Roy replied smoothly with a hidden dark tone under that voice, "First, I'm the Fuhrer now. I have right to do anything I want in this military, even though the plan to make the women wear skirt failed. And Second, You were the one who seduced me before I made a serious move. So I'd consider it even."
"Oh, but Roy dear," the other bi voice replied back with clogging sugary-ness, "You almost kissed me the day before I jumped on you."
"You were the one who was topless in my office" he almost heard the smirk in Roy's voice, "I mean, I know it was 112 degrees outside and the air conditioner was broken, but you didn't have to take it off to entertain me."
"I didn't take it off to entertain you, Mustang," came back the sarcastic voice, emphasizing on the "you," "You were leering at my chest! Roy, you pervert! Ha ha ha. Right." The girl was giggling on the second to the next sentence, but dropped back to sarcastic tone on her last two statements.
"Oh, what's that I hear? What makes you assume that I was leering at your chest," a pause, "If I was to stare at one's chest, it wouldn't flat like yours, you know"
"What, you have problem with that? What are you, gay?" the voice snorted again, and with a slight shuffle, the sound of lips meeting skin came back, "Oh excuse me, your Excellency. You were gay. Sorry about that."
Hughes's hands twitched slightly, wandering if he should now hang up the phone, or just listen to them all the way. "But then again," Roy smoothly said, sound of skin contact coming back with some shifts, moans, and whimpers from his companion, "So are you," a slight pause, which was enough to make Hughes's eyes bulge out slightly, "Hagane no."
Then Brigadier General Maes Hughes, the family man, a good husband and a father who was brought back to life, screamed.
-
"I didn't take it off to entertain you, Mustang," Ed sarcastically replied while emphasizing on the "you," "You were leering at my chest! Roy, you pervert! Ha ha ha. Right" he mock-giggled like a real girl on the second to next statements before dropping back down to a sarcastic tone on the last two.
"Oh, what's that I hear?" Roy lowered his eyelids to stare at Ed with half closed eyes seductively, who was still staring down at him with the look in his eyes, even though his stomach and lower regions were sprawled on Roy, "What makes you assume that I was leering at your chest?" then he paused for a moment or two, "If I was to stare at one's chest, it wouldn't flat like yours, you know?"
"What, you have problem with that? What are you, gay?" Ed snorted again, and shifted his body closer to Roy while bending down to kiss along the line of Roy's throat, "Oh, excuse me your Excellency," Ed grinned against Roy's throat, "You were gay. Sorry about that."
Roy sat up a little with his elbows bent to support his upper body's weight, "But then again," he smoothly said and traced the outer shell of Ed's ear with his tongue, earning more shifts, stifled moans and whimpers from the blonde, "So are you," He let a pause linger in the air, all the while smirking, "Hagane no."
That was when they heard a shrill mid-aged male scream from the innocent little phone that was set beside them. Roy sat up to retrieve the phone hastily, immediately yelling, "Hughes! How long have you been there? Answer me Hughes!"
Only a continued scream and a haste click answered the Fuhrer Roy Mustang's demanding yelling.
Both Roy and Ed's head whipped around hastily to see the other's horrified expression.
"Shit," was all they said.
TSUZUKU ? or OWARI
Author's Notes:
Right, first completed drabble for hagaren. and please ignore the grammar errors. I started the other two before this one, but this just happened to finish faster. If inspired enough, maybe I'll continue this little drabble a bit longer... I just happen to love RoyEd or EdRoy coupling so much that I had to write this. blinks at the readers What? A rabid fan girl of shounen manga do have her sick moments, you know! mumbles I think my face is burning enough to cook Ramen on it.
If you think Hughes was OOC in this one, think again. I'd scream like that if I found out through the noises of the phone that one of my best friends was lesbian.