Hey All... so this one's a bit different, it's based on the scene in Lady Knight where Kel's rescue party comes across the illusion of the big Scanran army.

And yeah, disclaimer still applies.

-- Lyre

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Why did the chicken cross the road?

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Kel's rescue party sat dejectedly around their camp in the Scanran woods. They had run out of food rations just that morning. Now, knights, animals, men of the Own, a young boy and a squire alike, were hungry.

"Hey Kel," asked Merric. "Why is that chicken crossing the road?"

Chicken? Thought Kel, as she shrugged. I don't see a chicken. Is Merric really so hungry that he's started to see chickens? I knew he shouldn't have come after that injury...

Neal sighed and licked his lips. "Ah, chicken."

Not him too. He isn't even injured.

Tobe saw Neal eying the chicken. "Sir Neal, I'll help you catch it."

Neal smiled wolfishly, something he had learnt from his knight mistress. "Let's get a net."

Kel rolled her eyes, and poked Dom. "Do you see this 'chicken' too?"

"Mmm," murmured Dom, deep in thought. "Kel – there's something wrong with that chicken."

"Oh really," answered Kel sarcastically. "Is it not plump enough for your tastes Dom?"

Dom looked at Kel oddly, and looked back at the chicken. Then he said, "Kel, that chicken doesn't blink."

I have single handedly caused a band of full-grown men to lose their sanity. Now that's an accomplishment.

Kel felt something tickling her forehead, and reached up her hand to scratch. Only, her fingers landed on her griffin feathers. I wonder... Kel removed the feathers from her hair and her eyes widened.

Kel saw the chicken.

It was crossing the road.

Back and forth, back and forth.

Dom was right, the chicken didn't blink. She picked up the griffin feathers and the chicken disappeared.

"Lads it's an illusion!"

Neal looked over from his chicken-stalking-with-a-net-in-the-bushes position. "But it's so plump and juicy looking!"

"Neal!" Repeated Kel, "It's an illusion."

"That doesn't make sense, why would anyone bother making an illusion-chicken?"

"To divert our attention?" Kel suggested.

"From what?" asked Neal.

Meanwhile, Merric and Esmond had been sneaking up on the "chicken". With his fingers, Esmond signaled "3... 2...1" The two knights jumped the chicken. And, went right through it.

Neal winced. Kel rolled her eyes.

"I'm not sure," Kel admitted, returning to their conversation.

Owen spoke up. "Maybe, the chicken is real, but doesn't want to get eaten. So he's making us think he's an illusion. A.... a... magic chicken!"

"Hare-brain," said Neal. "If he's a magic chicken why doesn't he magic himself away, instead of standing there crossing the road?"

Owen pouted.

"Hey," said Kel. "It's not a 'he'. That would be a rooster. Chickens are female."

"Yeah," added Owen.

Dom snickered. "Listen to yourselves. You're arguing about the sex of an imaginary chicken."

"You stay out of this," snarled Neal.

"Fine. But don't come crying to me when....."

Three miles away, Stenum chuckled to himself and congratulated his mages on a job well done. Their 'chicken' had done the small – but much needed- trick to finally push those crazy Tortallans over the edge.

/././././././././././.

So whaddya think, I know there's not as much humour in it as in the other ones but hey...

Anyways, I think I might go back to the standard form for the next set of chicken jokes.

Love it? Hate it? Review and tell all! (Thanks SO much to everyone who reviewed my Alanna chicken jokes!)

-- Lyre