Cry Fatty, Cry
Authors Note:
Kaji: Alright. I made a little mistake in the last chapter. I accidentally called Brit, Bridget. So sue me. I was tired when I wrote that chapter. Well, now that that's cleared up, on with the story.
Kurai: Like the title? I came up with it myself.
Kaji: I think they've already guessed that. Do the disclaimer.
Kurai: Fine.
Disclaimer: We do not own beyblade. Not even Kai, Rei, or Max. (tear drop)
Kaji: Riiiight. Anyways, on with the story.
Kai watched the computer screen over Ray's shoulder. They were on the official little peoples disease website to figure out what the cure was. Ray clicked on the cure link.
"Here it is. Okay. If people in your household are suffering from the little peoples disease, you must not feed them candy. If you feed them candy, and the next day they are still chibi, then they will be bouncing off the walls all day. They will become psycotic and very tempermental. Although this may seem like a bad thing, they will cry a lot more then usual. This is actually a very good thing, since the cure to the disease is the number of times a chibi person cries. If you make a person with the disease cry enough times, then they will turn back to normal the very next morning. Below is a link you can use to figure out how many times a person needs to cry by entering in their full name." Ray read the page out loud. Kai snickered.
"We may have an annoying problem, Rei. Uh, I kind of gave you and Max candy yesterday. Good job your not chibi anymore, huh?" Rei froze.
"You gave Max, candy? Are you frigin' serious? YOU DON'T EVER GIVE MAX CANDY UNLESS HE GETS IT HIMSELF! You know what happens when he eats candy, then takes his pills. Why did you give him candy? No wonder he says he caught a monster last night. Good job he didn't take his medicine at twelve o-clock, right? Right? Kai? Please tell me he didn't take his medicine at midnight?" Kai glanced over at Max, who was busy playing with a lighter on the couch.
"Well, at least now we know why he's setting the couch on fire." Rei wheeled around.
"WHAT!? MAX! NO MAX! BAD MAX! VERY, VERY BAD MAX!" Rei rushed over and pried the lighter out of his tiny grip. Max's eyes welled up with tears and he started to cry.
"I WANT MY LIGHTER BACK!"
"Wouldn't you rather have a, uh, um, a, uh, a pen?"
"Bad move, Rei. Let's see. R-E-I-M-O-N-D space K-O-N. Huh. Only two times. God you were such a crybaby. I thought it would say at least ten."
"YAY! DRAW ON COUCH! DRAW ON WALL! DRAW ON DRAGOON! YAY! DRAWING IS FUN!"
"NO MAX, NO! WHERE'D YOU GET DRAGOON? GIVE ME THE PEN. GIVE. IT. TO. ME. NOW!"
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! AT LEAST I HAVE DRAGOON!"
"Uh, M-A-X space T-A-T-E. Holly crapaholic. Ten. Didn't see that comin'."
"Give me Dragoon. Give me Dragoon, Max! FOR GOD'S SAKE, MAX, GIVE ME DRAGOON! NOW!"
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! REI STOLE BEYBLADE! REI YELLED AT ME! REI SO MEAN! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
"Come on, Max, stop crying. Look." Rei picked up the remote and turned on the TV.
"South Park, Max. Don't you want to watch it?" Max's eyes widened.
"YAAAAAAAAAAAY! REI SO NICE!"
"T-Y-S-O-N space G-R-A-N-G-E-R. CRAPYSHITAFACATA! TWENTY! I WAS JUST BEING SARCASTIC WHEN I GUESSED THAT NUMBER! I DIDN'T ACTUALLY THINK THAT I'D BE RIGHT!"
"What the hell are you doing, Kai?" Rei walked back over to the computer.
"What's it look like, Einstein? K-E-N-N-Y space, uh, what's Kenny's last name?" Rei shrugged at Kai.
"I have no frigin clue. Just put chief, it'll work."
"Computer error. This program has performed an illegal operation and must be shut down or reset. Yah, Rei. See, this piece of crap is working just perfectly. Baka neckojin." Rei sighed.
"Try control alt delete." Kai typed ctrl alt delete and then went back to the website. Instead of typing Kenny Chief in, he typed, Chief Kenny. A big number appeared on the screen.
"Six. See, I'm not technologically challenged, like some baka neckojin in this room." Rei glared at Kai.
"Okay. Kenny takes six. Max takes ten, and Tyson takes twenty. So, Kenny has cried.......................around four times, Max has cried only three times, counting that last huge commotion you both made, and Tyson has cried, one, two........three, ...............four, five......six, seven times." Kai counted off with his hands lazily behind his head.
"We'd better put your name in to, just to be safe Kai."
"Okay, not that I'll actually catch this stupid thing anyway. K-A-I space H-I-W-A-T-A-R-I. Five. Well, just hope I don't turn chibi. You'll never get me back to normal, I assure you." Rei nodded in agreement.
"I agree. You'd be a little kid for the rest of your life." Kai smirked evilly.
"That actually wouldn't be so bad." An evil glint in Kai's eye caught Rei's attention.
"Kai? Don't get any ideas now."
"To late for that." Tyson and Kenny came running down the stairs, yelling, "HUNGRY! HUNGRY! HUNGRY! HUNGRY! HUNGRY!" Kai sighed heavily.
"Okay, here's the plan for today. You make Max and Kenny cry, and I'll make Tyson cry." He smirked evilly, giving Rei a very, very bad feeling that Tyson may be in for a world of pain. Never the less, he nodded in agreement. Kai rubbed his hands together cynically.
"Good. Good." He walked up to Tyson casually.
"Okay, Tyson. Here's what we're going to do today. You're not having any breakfast, at all. You've slacked off to much in your training, so it's time to catch up with the rest of us and I, your team captain, will make sure you actually do it all." Tyson's jaw hit the floor. Kai's expression didn't change to an, 'I'm only joking, your so stupid for believing me' expression. Rei grinned evilly at him.
"Do what he says and no one gets hurt. Come on Max, Kenny, time to eat some breakfast." Tyson watched sorrowfully as Kenny and Max went to the kitchen to eat, then glared up at Kai.
"You aren't the boss of me, so I don't have to do what you...Ouch! That hurt! You're so mean!" Tears streamed down Tyson's face. Kai had punched him in the back of the head, almost knocking him clear off of his feet.
"I'm going to enjoy this." Kai smirked.
In the Kitchen
"Guess what's for breakfast?" Rei went into the kitchen area as Kenny and Max settled themselves down at the table.
"Brussel sprouts?" Kenny piped up.
"Eeeew. Gross. Are we having lucky charms?" Max's face lit up. Rei grinned evilly.
"Max, you're having porridge, with no brown sugar or anything else on it. And Kenny, you're having cinnamon toast crunch." Rei smiled evilly as the two children started bawling their eyes out.
"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I hate porridge!"
"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I hate sugar!" Rei placed a bowl in front of each of them, laughing. As soon as the two kids saw what was in the bowls, they immediately stopped crying and gave a huge cheer.
"Yay! Froot Loops!" Max yelled before gorging his face.
"Yay! Steamed broccoli and carrots!" Kenny screamed before eating his breakfast silently. Kai came walking in a few minutes afterward with a scowling Tyson.
"That wasn't very funny, Kai. You tricked me! You said we was going to train all morning, and you made me cry! Then you laughed at me and said we weren't! I hate your gutses!" Tyson pouted as Rei put a bowl of cheerios under his nose. Kai walked into the kitchen area.
"Okay, Tyson's cried nine times now. Just eleven more to go." Rei looked up.
"Uh, Kenny's cried five times and Max has cried four times. Kenny just needs to cry one more time, and Max has to cry six..." Max's shrill crying was heard from the table.
"Make that five more times he has to cry." Kai and Rei grabbed two bowls of Froot Loops and went to the kitchen table.
"What the hell is your problem now?" Kai snapped at Max. Max stopped crying, wiped his eyes off, then started crying again.
"First Kenny threw a carrot at me, now Kai is yelling at me! I'M SO UNLOVED!" Tyson threw his arms around Max's neck.
"But I love you Max!" Max screamed, completely terrified, then fell off of his chair backwards.
"Baka Heintai! BAKA HEINTAI!" He screamed up at Tyson. Tyson crossed his arms and pouted.
"Go to your room, Tyson." Kai spat without looking up.
"WHY? I DIDN'T DO NOTHIN'!" Tyson screamed across the table at Kai.
"Go to your room for attempting to rape Max." Max sat up onto his chair and looked at Kai, confused.
"What does rape mean?" Kenny turned to Max.
"It's when somebody attempts to have........mph!" Rei had practically jumped across the table to cover Kenny's mouth before he could say too much.
"DON'T EXPLAIN, THAT, TO THEM! Wait. How do you know what it means?" Rei sat back down properly in his chair. Kenny beamed up at him.
"I have memorized every single word in the dictionary, so I even know about those kinds of words." Tyson turned to Kenny.
"But what does ra..."
"Go to your room Tyson." Kai cut Tyson off. Tyson's eyes welled up with tears and he ran, crying all the way up to his room.
"Ten more times." Kai sighed.
After Breakfast Kai stood on the second floor at the top of the staircase.
"Tyson! You can come out of your room now!" The door to Tyson's room flew open and Tyson came running out of it. Kai smirked evilly as he stuck out his foot. Tyson didn't even stand a chance.
In the Living Room
"Kenny, I didn't want to say this in front of everyone else, just to save what's left of your reputation, but memorizing words from the dictionary is not cool. You are a retard for thinking you were cool." Rei was giving Kenny a lecture on how much of a loser he was in front of Max. Kenny's eyes welled up with tears and he started dramatically crying. Rei patted him on the shoulder.
"It's okay, loser. You can play on the computer for the rest of the day." Kenny stopped crying and ran to the computer as fast as he could. He gave it a big hug, then played solitaire for the rest of the day.
"That takes care of Kenny. Now for Max. Only four more to go and..." Rei was cut short as he heard a shrill surprised cry, then what sounded like something falling down the stairs, a loud thud, then shrill crying.
"Did Kai do what I think he did?" Rei ran to the staircase to see if he was right. Sure enough, he was. Kai had tripped Tyson down the stairs, so he fell flat on his face. Kai came walking down the stairs casually, like nothing had happened.
"Nine," was his simple response. The smoke alarm suddenly went off in the living room.
"Shit." Rei ran to the living room, leaving Kai with Tyson. When Rei had gotten there, he found that Max had set the couch on fire. Where he had gotten a lighter again, he had no clue.
"MAX! WHAT THE HELL!" Rei quickly grabbed the fire extinguisher and put the fire out before it spread. An aggravated voice sounded from the corner.
"What's with all this noise? Can't a girl get her beauty sleep?" Startled, Ray turned to see Hilary sitting in a corner, rubbing her eyes and head. Kai came in with Tyson.
"I forgot, you're still here." Ray turned to Kai, confusion written all over his face.
"When did she get here?" Kai casually sat back on the couch and abruptly took the lighter out of Max's hand with one swift move, causing him to cry again.
"Yesterday. Max knocked her out in the doorway, so we moved her into a corner so she wouldn't be in the way." He finished as though there was nothing wrong with what he had just said. Max grabbed the lighter out of Kai's hand and threw it at Hilary, which hit her in the same spot on the head as he had hit her with the baseball bat. She swayed dangerously for a second, then fell over, unconscious.
"Kay? How many times has that happen to her?" Rei raised an eyebrow at the uncaring Kai.
"That's only the second time."
"Only?" Kai smirked at Rei.
"What's with you? Why do you even care? She's Tyson's girlfriend after all." Rei looked taken back.
"WHAT! I don't like (shudders) Hilary. I was just wondering, that's all. Come on, I have a girlfriend. Mariah. Remember?" Kai smirked.
"That's what I said when I walked in on you and Salema." Rei's face turned bright red.
"Shut up. Just, shut up." Rei went into the other room so he didn't have to talk to Kai anymore. Kai snickered as he watched the Kenny on the TV wave to everyone on a set of train tracks, then get mowed over by a train.
"You know, that's not a half bad idea to try out on someone who I know. Heh heh heh." Tyson walked up and stood in front of Kai.
"I WANT TO GO TO THE PARK! EITHER YOU TAKE ME OR WE GO SEE BARNY LIVE, AGAIN!" Kai gave Tyson a killer death glare.
"HELL NO! We're staying, here, today. Now go away! South Parks on!" Tyson didn't give up. He sat down next to Kai, then started saying, "Please can we go to the park? Please can we go to the park? Please can we go to the park? Please can we go to the park? Please can we go to the park? Please can we go to the park?" On and on he went, until finally, Max started to bawl his eyes out.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! I CAN'T HEAR THE TV!" Kai punched Tyson in the head, and he started crying his head off to. Kai was surrounded.
"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Max and Tyson immediately stopped crying. They both sat there, shaking. Rei walked into the room to see what was going on. Kai looked up at him, completely pissed off.
"Eight, and four." Was his simple response. Rei nodded slightly, then went back into the kitchen. Kai raised an eyebrow. Tyson tugged at Kai's arm timidly.
"Can we have lunch now?" He glared at Tyson.
"No. We don't have any food left. We don't have enough money to buy food, so you're going to starve for a while. Oh, and Max. Your candy got thrown out by accident. Totally Rei's fault. Not mine. Not mine at all." Max and Tyson started to cry again.
"Seven, three. Just kidding. You guys are so frigin guliable." Max stopped crying, then started crying again. Tyson stopped crying and crossed his arms, pouting. Kai stood up, grabbed Tyson by the ear, and bashed his head into the coffee table. Tyson, sat dazed for a second, then started bawling his eyes out as he realized what had happened. Kai smirked once again.
'This is fun. I should do it more often. It sure does make me feel better.' Kai couldn't help to think to himself. Rei appeared in the doorway again. Again, Kai simple responded, "Six, two." Rei glared at Kai.
"Lay off. Making Max cry is my job." Kai lazily leaned back on the couch.
"Hurry up then. I'm actually having fun today." He changed the channel to tree house, making both Max and Tyson extremely happy as they both stopped crying and ran to sit in front of the TV. Rei shuddered and went back into the other room. Kai stood up, punched Tyson in the back of the head, causing him to cry again, and went into the other room to see what Rei was doing. As he entered the kitchen, he heard immediate crying from Max, who was screaming about not being able to hear the TV. Rei was sitting at the table, playing solitaire. Kai walked over and flicked the deck, causing the cards to scatter all over the table. Rei glared up him.
"Excuse me? You wanna pick those up." Kai smirked at Rei.
"Sorry. Forgot. You're not a little kid. I don't need to make you cry."
"Ha ha. Very funny. Now pick up the cards." Kai wandered into the kitchen area.
"Nah. I'd rather not." He mixed up some iced tea. Returning into the dining room area, he almost dropped his glass. Rei held up Dranzer, a sly grin on his face.
"Haven't seen this in a while, have you?" Kai placed his drink on the table and attempted to grab Dranzer from Rei. Rei jumped out of reach and put the blade in his back pocket.
"Pick up the cards." Kai gave Rei a deadly death glare. He walked around the table and put all of the cards that were scattered around the table in a messy pile. He then turned to Rei.
"Give it here, now." Rei's grin didn't fall. He simply sat down and continued to play solitaire, ignoring Kai.
"Give Dranzer to me now, Rei." Kai growled forcefully. Rei smiled. He was having fun annoying the hell out of Kai. Kai, completely pissed off now, flicked the deck of cards over again, once again causing the cards to scatter all over the table, and earning another glare from Rei. Kai then picked up his drink and went back to the living room, making Rei pick the cards up himself. He walked over to the coffee table, picked up the remote, then turned off the TV. Max immediately started crying, and Tyson glared at Kai. Before he could complain, Kai flicked the TV back on and went somewhere else in the house. A few minutes later, he appeared at the living room window, which was open to let ventilation into the house on that hot day.
"Tyson. Run into the kitchen, then go out the door into the backyard. There's a surprise waiting for you outside. Don't stop running, no matter what. If you stop running, the surprise won't be that exciting. I've already opened the glass door for you, so you don't have to worry about it." Tyson jumped up and raced for the kitchen. Kai smirked evilly, then ran as fast as he could for the backyard so he wouldn't miss the show. He made it to the backyard before Tyson made it into the kitchen. He sat down on the grass, just as Tyson entered the dining area. Tyson ran, and ran, and ran, then smacked, right into the glass screen on the sliding door to the outside. He could see Rei burst out laughing through the kitchen window and couldn't help to snicker himself. Rei glanced out the glass door at Kai. Kai held up four fingers, a huge grin on his face. Tyson had finally stopped crying and opened the door to the outside, only to slip on the greased steps and fell flat on his face. Kai and Rei both burst out laughing as Tyson started crying again. Kai held up three fingers as he wiped a tear from his eye. This was the best day ever. Tyson, sobbing, waddled over to Kai.
"(sob) w-where's the s-sur (sob) s-surprise?" Kai smiled evilly.
"That was the surprise. Go and watch TV, runt. You cry to much." Tyson turned around, biting his lip, he ran back inside. Kai went back into the house through the kitchen door. He was still chuckling.
"I haven't had this fun in ages. I should remember to do this more often." Rei raised an eyebrow.
"Remind me to never piss you off again from this day on." Kai and Rei decided to settle into a game of risk. After a few hours, plus a lunch break, Kai had dominated all of Asia, North America, and Europe, with most of his troupes in Russia. Rei owned all of South America, Africa, and Australia. Most of his forces were in Australia, but he was losing Africa fast. Tyson came waddling into the kitchen, looking for something to eat. Max had gotten bored of little kids shows, and changed the channel to the comedy network, and was now watching punk'd. Tyson had gotten hungry, so he had headed to the kitchen. Kai stood up to cause some more pain Tyson's way. He cut Tyson off from the fridge, then blocked the whole way, taking his sweet time finding something to eat. Tyson, very pissed, started pouting. Kai abruptly, "accidentally" stood up straight and as he turned to one side, he clubbed Tyson in the gut with his elbow. Tyson dropped to the ground, crying his eyes out. Kai rolled his eyes. He closed the fridge after taking out some dip and opened a cupboard, got out some chips, then poured some in a bowl. Seeing this, Tyson sat up attentively, wiped his eyes clean of tears, then reached up to take the bowl of chips. Kai batted Tyson to one side.
"This isn't for you, stupid frickin brat." He walked back to their game and set down the bowl and dip down on the table and took his turn. Tyson, denied food, started to cry, again.
"That kid is really starting to piss me off. He's such a friggin cry baby." Kai scowled. Rei got up and gave Tyson a bowl of chips and some dip. Tyson immediately stopped crying, grabbed the bowl, and ran into the living room. After their game, which Kai demolished Rei's forces, they decided to send everyone to bed and get a good nights sleep. They both looked forward to a chibi free morning.
"One more time. I just have to make Tyson cry one more time. It has to be good though." Kai mumbled to Rei as they entered the living room.
"Alright, time for bed you guys." Rei shooed them upstairs. Kenny had finally gotten off of the computer and had joined Max and Tyson watching TV. Rei turned off the TV as Kai anxiously raced up the stairs.
"Don't forget to brush your teeth, Tyson." Kai mumbled sleepily to Tyson. Max and Kenny were already in the bathroom brushing their teeth, so Tyson was the last one to use the sink. Kai waited for Tyson to finish in the bathroom just outside the door. As Tyson strolled sleepily through the doorway, Kai slammed the door as hard as he could. The door smashed Tyson in the face, and he instantly started to cry.
"Finally. No more chibi Tyson in the morning." Kai sighed happily as he flopped down onto his bed. Today had been one of the best days of his life. To bad, today was just the beginning.
End Note:
Kaji: Muahahahahahaha! Clifie! Yes folks, this is just the beginning. As if I would end the story here.
Tori: I'm scared. Kai laughed in this chapter.
Kurai: Kai laughed?! CRAPYSHITAFACATA! (nice word Kai;)) IT'S A SIGHN OF THE APOCOLIPS! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!
Kaji: (Sighs) I probably won't update for a while. Heh heh heh. I have holidays coming up soon and I'm currently multi tasking writing another major story. Check out Life On the Downside, written completely by Kurai.
Kurai: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!
Tori: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! APOCOLIPS!
Kurai: You're so frigin gulliable! R&R plz ppl.
Tori: grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Kaji: (sighs) Here are some pplz that reviewed.
Hazel – Beka: Aaaawwww. So cute : )
Zetunia: Happy you really like.
Fireli ' leana: That quote is so true.
Tika the Fire Goddess: YAY! A whole different type of torture is about to commence. ; )
Kaji: That's all, for now. Heh heh heh. R&R plz ppl.
Authors Note:
Kaji: Alright. I made a little mistake in the last chapter. I accidentally called Brit, Bridget. So sue me. I was tired when I wrote that chapter. Well, now that that's cleared up, on with the story.
Kurai: Like the title? I came up with it myself.
Kaji: I think they've already guessed that. Do the disclaimer.
Kurai: Fine.
Disclaimer: We do not own beyblade. Not even Kai, Rei, or Max. (tear drop)
Kaji: Riiiight. Anyways, on with the story.
Kai watched the computer screen over Ray's shoulder. They were on the official little peoples disease website to figure out what the cure was. Ray clicked on the cure link.
"Here it is. Okay. If people in your household are suffering from the little peoples disease, you must not feed them candy. If you feed them candy, and the next day they are still chibi, then they will be bouncing off the walls all day. They will become psycotic and very tempermental. Although this may seem like a bad thing, they will cry a lot more then usual. This is actually a very good thing, since the cure to the disease is the number of times a chibi person cries. If you make a person with the disease cry enough times, then they will turn back to normal the very next morning. Below is a link you can use to figure out how many times a person needs to cry by entering in their full name." Ray read the page out loud. Kai snickered.
"We may have an annoying problem, Rei. Uh, I kind of gave you and Max candy yesterday. Good job your not chibi anymore, huh?" Rei froze.
"You gave Max, candy? Are you frigin' serious? YOU DON'T EVER GIVE MAX CANDY UNLESS HE GETS IT HIMSELF! You know what happens when he eats candy, then takes his pills. Why did you give him candy? No wonder he says he caught a monster last night. Good job he didn't take his medicine at twelve o-clock, right? Right? Kai? Please tell me he didn't take his medicine at midnight?" Kai glanced over at Max, who was busy playing with a lighter on the couch.
"Well, at least now we know why he's setting the couch on fire." Rei wheeled around.
"WHAT!? MAX! NO MAX! BAD MAX! VERY, VERY BAD MAX!" Rei rushed over and pried the lighter out of his tiny grip. Max's eyes welled up with tears and he started to cry.
"I WANT MY LIGHTER BACK!"
"Wouldn't you rather have a, uh, um, a, uh, a pen?"
"Bad move, Rei. Let's see. R-E-I-M-O-N-D space K-O-N. Huh. Only two times. God you were such a crybaby. I thought it would say at least ten."
"YAY! DRAW ON COUCH! DRAW ON WALL! DRAW ON DRAGOON! YAY! DRAWING IS FUN!"
"NO MAX, NO! WHERE'D YOU GET DRAGOON? GIVE ME THE PEN. GIVE. IT. TO. ME. NOW!"
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! AT LEAST I HAVE DRAGOON!"
"Uh, M-A-X space T-A-T-E. Holly crapaholic. Ten. Didn't see that comin'."
"Give me Dragoon. Give me Dragoon, Max! FOR GOD'S SAKE, MAX, GIVE ME DRAGOON! NOW!"
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! REI STOLE BEYBLADE! REI YELLED AT ME! REI SO MEAN! WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH!"
"Come on, Max, stop crying. Look." Rei picked up the remote and turned on the TV.
"South Park, Max. Don't you want to watch it?" Max's eyes widened.
"YAAAAAAAAAAAY! REI SO NICE!"
"T-Y-S-O-N space G-R-A-N-G-E-R. CRAPYSHITAFACATA! TWENTY! I WAS JUST BEING SARCASTIC WHEN I GUESSED THAT NUMBER! I DIDN'T ACTUALLY THINK THAT I'D BE RIGHT!"
"What the hell are you doing, Kai?" Rei walked back over to the computer.
"What's it look like, Einstein? K-E-N-N-Y space, uh, what's Kenny's last name?" Rei shrugged at Kai.
"I have no frigin clue. Just put chief, it'll work."
"Computer error. This program has performed an illegal operation and must be shut down or reset. Yah, Rei. See, this piece of crap is working just perfectly. Baka neckojin." Rei sighed.
"Try control alt delete." Kai typed ctrl alt delete and then went back to the website. Instead of typing Kenny Chief in, he typed, Chief Kenny. A big number appeared on the screen.
"Six. See, I'm not technologically challenged, like some baka neckojin in this room." Rei glared at Kai.
"Okay. Kenny takes six. Max takes ten, and Tyson takes twenty. So, Kenny has cried.......................around four times, Max has cried only three times, counting that last huge commotion you both made, and Tyson has cried, one, two........three, ...............four, five......six, seven times." Kai counted off with his hands lazily behind his head.
"We'd better put your name in to, just to be safe Kai."
"Okay, not that I'll actually catch this stupid thing anyway. K-A-I space H-I-W-A-T-A-R-I. Five. Well, just hope I don't turn chibi. You'll never get me back to normal, I assure you." Rei nodded in agreement.
"I agree. You'd be a little kid for the rest of your life." Kai smirked evilly.
"That actually wouldn't be so bad." An evil glint in Kai's eye caught Rei's attention.
"Kai? Don't get any ideas now."
"To late for that." Tyson and Kenny came running down the stairs, yelling, "HUNGRY! HUNGRY! HUNGRY! HUNGRY! HUNGRY!" Kai sighed heavily.
"Okay, here's the plan for today. You make Max and Kenny cry, and I'll make Tyson cry." He smirked evilly, giving Rei a very, very bad feeling that Tyson may be in for a world of pain. Never the less, he nodded in agreement. Kai rubbed his hands together cynically.
"Good. Good." He walked up to Tyson casually.
"Okay, Tyson. Here's what we're going to do today. You're not having any breakfast, at all. You've slacked off to much in your training, so it's time to catch up with the rest of us and I, your team captain, will make sure you actually do it all." Tyson's jaw hit the floor. Kai's expression didn't change to an, 'I'm only joking, your so stupid for believing me' expression. Rei grinned evilly at him.
"Do what he says and no one gets hurt. Come on Max, Kenny, time to eat some breakfast." Tyson watched sorrowfully as Kenny and Max went to the kitchen to eat, then glared up at Kai.
"You aren't the boss of me, so I don't have to do what you...Ouch! That hurt! You're so mean!" Tears streamed down Tyson's face. Kai had punched him in the back of the head, almost knocking him clear off of his feet.
"I'm going to enjoy this." Kai smirked.
In the Kitchen
"Guess what's for breakfast?" Rei went into the kitchen area as Kenny and Max settled themselves down at the table.
"Brussel sprouts?" Kenny piped up.
"Eeeew. Gross. Are we having lucky charms?" Max's face lit up. Rei grinned evilly.
"Max, you're having porridge, with no brown sugar or anything else on it. And Kenny, you're having cinnamon toast crunch." Rei smiled evilly as the two children started bawling their eyes out.
"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I hate porridge!"
"Waaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaah! I hate sugar!" Rei placed a bowl in front of each of them, laughing. As soon as the two kids saw what was in the bowls, they immediately stopped crying and gave a huge cheer.
"Yay! Froot Loops!" Max yelled before gorging his face.
"Yay! Steamed broccoli and carrots!" Kenny screamed before eating his breakfast silently. Kai came walking in a few minutes afterward with a scowling Tyson.
"That wasn't very funny, Kai. You tricked me! You said we was going to train all morning, and you made me cry! Then you laughed at me and said we weren't! I hate your gutses!" Tyson pouted as Rei put a bowl of cheerios under his nose. Kai walked into the kitchen area.
"Okay, Tyson's cried nine times now. Just eleven more to go." Rei looked up.
"Uh, Kenny's cried five times and Max has cried four times. Kenny just needs to cry one more time, and Max has to cry six..." Max's shrill crying was heard from the table.
"Make that five more times he has to cry." Kai and Rei grabbed two bowls of Froot Loops and went to the kitchen table.
"What the hell is your problem now?" Kai snapped at Max. Max stopped crying, wiped his eyes off, then started crying again.
"First Kenny threw a carrot at me, now Kai is yelling at me! I'M SO UNLOVED!" Tyson threw his arms around Max's neck.
"But I love you Max!" Max screamed, completely terrified, then fell off of his chair backwards.
"Baka Heintai! BAKA HEINTAI!" He screamed up at Tyson. Tyson crossed his arms and pouted.
"Go to your room, Tyson." Kai spat without looking up.
"WHY? I DIDN'T DO NOTHIN'!" Tyson screamed across the table at Kai.
"Go to your room for attempting to rape Max." Max sat up onto his chair and looked at Kai, confused.
"What does rape mean?" Kenny turned to Max.
"It's when somebody attempts to have........mph!" Rei had practically jumped across the table to cover Kenny's mouth before he could say too much.
"DON'T EXPLAIN, THAT, TO THEM! Wait. How do you know what it means?" Rei sat back down properly in his chair. Kenny beamed up at him.
"I have memorized every single word in the dictionary, so I even know about those kinds of words." Tyson turned to Kenny.
"But what does ra..."
"Go to your room Tyson." Kai cut Tyson off. Tyson's eyes welled up with tears and he ran, crying all the way up to his room.
"Ten more times." Kai sighed.
After Breakfast Kai stood on the second floor at the top of the staircase.
"Tyson! You can come out of your room now!" The door to Tyson's room flew open and Tyson came running out of it. Kai smirked evilly as he stuck out his foot. Tyson didn't even stand a chance.
In the Living Room
"Kenny, I didn't want to say this in front of everyone else, just to save what's left of your reputation, but memorizing words from the dictionary is not cool. You are a retard for thinking you were cool." Rei was giving Kenny a lecture on how much of a loser he was in front of Max. Kenny's eyes welled up with tears and he started dramatically crying. Rei patted him on the shoulder.
"It's okay, loser. You can play on the computer for the rest of the day." Kenny stopped crying and ran to the computer as fast as he could. He gave it a big hug, then played solitaire for the rest of the day.
"That takes care of Kenny. Now for Max. Only four more to go and..." Rei was cut short as he heard a shrill surprised cry, then what sounded like something falling down the stairs, a loud thud, then shrill crying.
"Did Kai do what I think he did?" Rei ran to the staircase to see if he was right. Sure enough, he was. Kai had tripped Tyson down the stairs, so he fell flat on his face. Kai came walking down the stairs casually, like nothing had happened.
"Nine," was his simple response. The smoke alarm suddenly went off in the living room.
"Shit." Rei ran to the living room, leaving Kai with Tyson. When Rei had gotten there, he found that Max had set the couch on fire. Where he had gotten a lighter again, he had no clue.
"MAX! WHAT THE HELL!" Rei quickly grabbed the fire extinguisher and put the fire out before it spread. An aggravated voice sounded from the corner.
"What's with all this noise? Can't a girl get her beauty sleep?" Startled, Ray turned to see Hilary sitting in a corner, rubbing her eyes and head. Kai came in with Tyson.
"I forgot, you're still here." Ray turned to Kai, confusion written all over his face.
"When did she get here?" Kai casually sat back on the couch and abruptly took the lighter out of Max's hand with one swift move, causing him to cry again.
"Yesterday. Max knocked her out in the doorway, so we moved her into a corner so she wouldn't be in the way." He finished as though there was nothing wrong with what he had just said. Max grabbed the lighter out of Kai's hand and threw it at Hilary, which hit her in the same spot on the head as he had hit her with the baseball bat. She swayed dangerously for a second, then fell over, unconscious.
"Kay? How many times has that happen to her?" Rei raised an eyebrow at the uncaring Kai.
"That's only the second time."
"Only?" Kai smirked at Rei.
"What's with you? Why do you even care? She's Tyson's girlfriend after all." Rei looked taken back.
"WHAT! I don't like (shudders) Hilary. I was just wondering, that's all. Come on, I have a girlfriend. Mariah. Remember?" Kai smirked.
"That's what I said when I walked in on you and Salema." Rei's face turned bright red.
"Shut up. Just, shut up." Rei went into the other room so he didn't have to talk to Kai anymore. Kai snickered as he watched the Kenny on the TV wave to everyone on a set of train tracks, then get mowed over by a train.
"You know, that's not a half bad idea to try out on someone who I know. Heh heh heh." Tyson walked up and stood in front of Kai.
"I WANT TO GO TO THE PARK! EITHER YOU TAKE ME OR WE GO SEE BARNY LIVE, AGAIN!" Kai gave Tyson a killer death glare.
"HELL NO! We're staying, here, today. Now go away! South Parks on!" Tyson didn't give up. He sat down next to Kai, then started saying, "Please can we go to the park? Please can we go to the park? Please can we go to the park? Please can we go to the park? Please can we go to the park? Please can we go to the park?" On and on he went, until finally, Max started to bawl his eyes out.
"WAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! I CAN'T HEAR THE TV!" Kai punched Tyson in the head, and he started crying his head off to. Kai was surrounded.
"SHUT THE FUCK UP!" Max and Tyson immediately stopped crying. They both sat there, shaking. Rei walked into the room to see what was going on. Kai looked up at him, completely pissed off.
"Eight, and four." Was his simple response. Rei nodded slightly, then went back into the kitchen. Kai raised an eyebrow. Tyson tugged at Kai's arm timidly.
"Can we have lunch now?" He glared at Tyson.
"No. We don't have any food left. We don't have enough money to buy food, so you're going to starve for a while. Oh, and Max. Your candy got thrown out by accident. Totally Rei's fault. Not mine. Not mine at all." Max and Tyson started to cry again.
"Seven, three. Just kidding. You guys are so frigin guliable." Max stopped crying, then started crying again. Tyson stopped crying and crossed his arms, pouting. Kai stood up, grabbed Tyson by the ear, and bashed his head into the coffee table. Tyson, sat dazed for a second, then started bawling his eyes out as he realized what had happened. Kai smirked once again.
'This is fun. I should do it more often. It sure does make me feel better.' Kai couldn't help to think to himself. Rei appeared in the doorway again. Again, Kai simple responded, "Six, two." Rei glared at Kai.
"Lay off. Making Max cry is my job." Kai lazily leaned back on the couch.
"Hurry up then. I'm actually having fun today." He changed the channel to tree house, making both Max and Tyson extremely happy as they both stopped crying and ran to sit in front of the TV. Rei shuddered and went back into the other room. Kai stood up, punched Tyson in the back of the head, causing him to cry again, and went into the other room to see what Rei was doing. As he entered the kitchen, he heard immediate crying from Max, who was screaming about not being able to hear the TV. Rei was sitting at the table, playing solitaire. Kai walked over and flicked the deck, causing the cards to scatter all over the table. Rei glared up him.
"Excuse me? You wanna pick those up." Kai smirked at Rei.
"Sorry. Forgot. You're not a little kid. I don't need to make you cry."
"Ha ha. Very funny. Now pick up the cards." Kai wandered into the kitchen area.
"Nah. I'd rather not." He mixed up some iced tea. Returning into the dining room area, he almost dropped his glass. Rei held up Dranzer, a sly grin on his face.
"Haven't seen this in a while, have you?" Kai placed his drink on the table and attempted to grab Dranzer from Rei. Rei jumped out of reach and put the blade in his back pocket.
"Pick up the cards." Kai gave Rei a deadly death glare. He walked around the table and put all of the cards that were scattered around the table in a messy pile. He then turned to Rei.
"Give it here, now." Rei's grin didn't fall. He simply sat down and continued to play solitaire, ignoring Kai.
"Give Dranzer to me now, Rei." Kai growled forcefully. Rei smiled. He was having fun annoying the hell out of Kai. Kai, completely pissed off now, flicked the deck of cards over again, once again causing the cards to scatter all over the table, and earning another glare from Rei. Kai then picked up his drink and went back to the living room, making Rei pick the cards up himself. He walked over to the coffee table, picked up the remote, then turned off the TV. Max immediately started crying, and Tyson glared at Kai. Before he could complain, Kai flicked the TV back on and went somewhere else in the house. A few minutes later, he appeared at the living room window, which was open to let ventilation into the house on that hot day.
"Tyson. Run into the kitchen, then go out the door into the backyard. There's a surprise waiting for you outside. Don't stop running, no matter what. If you stop running, the surprise won't be that exciting. I've already opened the glass door for you, so you don't have to worry about it." Tyson jumped up and raced for the kitchen. Kai smirked evilly, then ran as fast as he could for the backyard so he wouldn't miss the show. He made it to the backyard before Tyson made it into the kitchen. He sat down on the grass, just as Tyson entered the dining area. Tyson ran, and ran, and ran, then smacked, right into the glass screen on the sliding door to the outside. He could see Rei burst out laughing through the kitchen window and couldn't help to snicker himself. Rei glanced out the glass door at Kai. Kai held up four fingers, a huge grin on his face. Tyson had finally stopped crying and opened the door to the outside, only to slip on the greased steps and fell flat on his face. Kai and Rei both burst out laughing as Tyson started crying again. Kai held up three fingers as he wiped a tear from his eye. This was the best day ever. Tyson, sobbing, waddled over to Kai.
"(sob) w-where's the s-sur (sob) s-surprise?" Kai smiled evilly.
"That was the surprise. Go and watch TV, runt. You cry to much." Tyson turned around, biting his lip, he ran back inside. Kai went back into the house through the kitchen door. He was still chuckling.
"I haven't had this fun in ages. I should remember to do this more often." Rei raised an eyebrow.
"Remind me to never piss you off again from this day on." Kai and Rei decided to settle into a game of risk. After a few hours, plus a lunch break, Kai had dominated all of Asia, North America, and Europe, with most of his troupes in Russia. Rei owned all of South America, Africa, and Australia. Most of his forces were in Australia, but he was losing Africa fast. Tyson came waddling into the kitchen, looking for something to eat. Max had gotten bored of little kids shows, and changed the channel to the comedy network, and was now watching punk'd. Tyson had gotten hungry, so he had headed to the kitchen. Kai stood up to cause some more pain Tyson's way. He cut Tyson off from the fridge, then blocked the whole way, taking his sweet time finding something to eat. Tyson, very pissed, started pouting. Kai abruptly, "accidentally" stood up straight and as he turned to one side, he clubbed Tyson in the gut with his elbow. Tyson dropped to the ground, crying his eyes out. Kai rolled his eyes. He closed the fridge after taking out some dip and opened a cupboard, got out some chips, then poured some in a bowl. Seeing this, Tyson sat up attentively, wiped his eyes clean of tears, then reached up to take the bowl of chips. Kai batted Tyson to one side.
"This isn't for you, stupid frickin brat." He walked back to their game and set down the bowl and dip down on the table and took his turn. Tyson, denied food, started to cry, again.
"That kid is really starting to piss me off. He's such a friggin cry baby." Kai scowled. Rei got up and gave Tyson a bowl of chips and some dip. Tyson immediately stopped crying, grabbed the bowl, and ran into the living room. After their game, which Kai demolished Rei's forces, they decided to send everyone to bed and get a good nights sleep. They both looked forward to a chibi free morning.
"One more time. I just have to make Tyson cry one more time. It has to be good though." Kai mumbled to Rei as they entered the living room.
"Alright, time for bed you guys." Rei shooed them upstairs. Kenny had finally gotten off of the computer and had joined Max and Tyson watching TV. Rei turned off the TV as Kai anxiously raced up the stairs.
"Don't forget to brush your teeth, Tyson." Kai mumbled sleepily to Tyson. Max and Kenny were already in the bathroom brushing their teeth, so Tyson was the last one to use the sink. Kai waited for Tyson to finish in the bathroom just outside the door. As Tyson strolled sleepily through the doorway, Kai slammed the door as hard as he could. The door smashed Tyson in the face, and he instantly started to cry.
"Finally. No more chibi Tyson in the morning." Kai sighed happily as he flopped down onto his bed. Today had been one of the best days of his life. To bad, today was just the beginning.
End Note:
Kaji: Muahahahahahaha! Clifie! Yes folks, this is just the beginning. As if I would end the story here.
Tori: I'm scared. Kai laughed in this chapter.
Kurai: Kai laughed?! CRAPYSHITAFACATA! (nice word Kai;)) IT'S A SIGHN OF THE APOCOLIPS! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!
Kaji: (Sighs) I probably won't update for a while. Heh heh heh. I have holidays coming up soon and I'm currently multi tasking writing another major story. Check out Life On the Downside, written completely by Kurai.
Kurai: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! RUN FOR YOUR LIVES!
Tori: AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAH! APOCOLIPS!
Kurai: You're so frigin gulliable! R&R plz ppl.
Tori: grrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrr.
Kaji: (sighs) Here are some pplz that reviewed.
Hazel – Beka: Aaaawwww. So cute : )
Zetunia: Happy you really like.
Fireli ' leana: That quote is so true.
Tika the Fire Goddess: YAY! A whole different type of torture is about to commence. ; )
Kaji: That's all, for now. Heh heh heh. R&R plz ppl.