Chapter 2: Secrets Out

Early Thursday morning, Remus woke up, not remembering where he was. Then it all came back to him. Hogwarts, the shack, that night. He walked up to the barred window, and looked out into Hogsmeade village. A man in a black cloak with yellow spots on it greeted another man, wearing blue robes. "Good Thursday morning, to you, Sir Camdon!" said the man in the yellow-spotted cloak.

"Thursday morning!" Whispered Remus to himself. He was suppose to be in the hospital wing to rest up some more on Thursday morning.
Remus ran out of the shack down towards the secret passageway. He jetted his way out of the tree and sprinted up the grounds towards the castle. Once inside, he slowed down some, trying to catch his breath. As he passed the great hall, he peeked inside, and looked at the Gryffindor table. The sight of the food reminded him how hungry he was. He had a huge craving for a steak or ribs. Sirius was laughing at James, and Peter laughed a few seconds later, which caused the other two to look at him with a weird expression. James looked at the seat across from him, next to Sirius. It was empty. That was suppose to be Remus's seat. They were saying something, then Sirius glanced out toward the great hall. He must have seen him.
Remus took off quickly towards the hospital, running up the marble stairs. He stopped in front of the door, taking a step towards it.
"Ohhh look! Its loopy Lupin!" taunted Peeves, the poltergeist. Peeves's favorite thing in the entire world was to pull pranks and taunt the students. "What is loopy Lupin doing at the hospital? Shouldn't he be in the Great Hall eating Breakfast?"
"I-I'm sick Peeves, now leave me alone and move!" Remus shouted
"Aww is Ickle Rem-" Peeves what caught off by someone shouting his name
"PEEVES!!!" It shouted again. It was Filch, the caretaker. Peeves's face quickly turned into a guilty one, and he took off without even saying a goodbye taunt to Remus.
Remus shrugged and started to enter the Great Hall. He was interrupted again, this time by James calling out his name.
"Where have you been, Remus?" shouted Sirius, as the three ran down the corridor.
"Yea," Said James. Aren't you suppose to be in bed? What's wrong?"
"I've been on a walk. You know, needed a bit of fresh air." Remus told them.
"But Madam Jiggle wouldn't let us come in and see you at all!" Said Peter. Remus tried to think of what to tell them. But before he could come up with some wild story, Professor Dumbledore came up behind him.
"Hello Mr. Lupin." he said. "Mr. Potter, Mr. Black, Mr. Pettigrew."
"H-Hello Professor D-Dumbledore," stuttered Sirius.
"We Just wanted to see Remus, Professor." James protested. "Madam Jiggle wouldn't let us see him all week!"
"Mr. Lupin needs one more day of rest boys. You can come visit him after the day's classes are over." Said Dumbledore.
The boys groaned. "Yes sir," James stated, as he ruffled his hair. "See you later Remus."

"Bye," said Remus. He wanted to talk to Lily Evans, who was walking his way, but Professor Dumbledore instructed him to go find his bed. He heard James call after Lily, but couldn't understand what she said. It must have been funny, because, next thing that he heard was Sirius's thunder of a laugh booming through the corridor.

Madam Jiggle had directed Remus to a bed, where she gave him strict orders to stay put. Professor Dumbledore entered the hospital wing along with Professor McGonagall. Madam Jiggle and the two professors talked in hushed whispers, occasionally glancing over at Remus's bed. He just pretended to be asleep.

Remus knew they were talking about his condition. His teachers always did this. The orphanage went through so many tutors for home schooling in the last 5 years, that the manager was almost jumped with glee when Remus received his Hogwarts acceptance letter. None of those tutors stayed around longer than 2 months due to Remus's...condition.

After what seemed like an hour, Dumbledore walked over to Remus's bedside and closed the curtains.

"Professor, isn't anyone going to be suspicious that I'm gone for an entire week once every month?" Remus questioned, trying not to sound too worried.

"My boy, don't worry. Madam Jiggle, Professor McGonagall, and myself are the only ones who are aware of your situation." Answered Dumbledore.

"But Sir, what about my-"

"Madam Jiggle will not let your friends in the hospital wing to visit you until you are back." Dumbledore interrupted, as if reading his mind.

Remus thought for a moment before saying, "Thank you Professor. I mean for accepting me to Hogwarts, and dealing with my," he gulped before adding, "condition."

Professor Dumbledore, looking down at him, smiled. His crystal blue eyes seemed to sparkle behind those half-moon spectacles of his. He smoothed his beard and replied, "You are, a very marvelous wizard Mr. Lupin. Your name has been down since you were born. It would be a shame to let one night's nasty episode ruin it all for you." His eyes gave another twinkle.

"Now, I trust you're little adventure won't stop you from finishing your homework," and he laid a stack parchment and a pile of books on top of Remus's stomach, causing him to let out a short "oof." Dumbledore smiled, and left the hospital wing, humming cheerfully to himself.

The mid-evening sun flooded into the hospital wing and showered its golden glow on Remus. He was sitting up in his hospital bed, working on his charms homework. Just as his feather lifted up off his knee by successfully performing the levitation charm, a brown barn owl swooped in the open window and landed on Remus's face with a thud. He spit out the feathers and muttered 'ruddy owl' under his breath. He wondered why the owl had flown in the hospital wing and who it was looking for. When he picked up the bird, a brown envelope with a red, loopy L in the upper right corner caught his eye. He picked it up and saw that it was addressed to him. He focused on the loopy red L, and for a minute or so, that's all he saw.

No, he thought. it couldn't be. He looked at the owl and saw a black ring around its left eye. Emmit? he thought.

He opened the envelope carefully, not believing his eyes. He unfolded the piece of parchment, wondering if he dared to read it. After a minutes arguing with himself, he let his eyes look at the brownish piece of parchment with loopy writing. It said::

Remus

Hello son. We just wanted to congratulate you on your getting

Into Hogwarts.

How did they know I got in? He read on.

Professor Dumbledore took the liberty to owl us about it.

Oh.. he thought, feeling a little stupid at the moment.

Hope you're doing fine and your certain illness isn't making it hard

On you. Your mother and I miss you, and hope you understand that

We still love you.

Best regards,

Mom and Dad.

Remus just stared at the letter. He read it once, but couldn't take his eyes off of it. How could he understand what his parents did. Did they expect him to be ecstatic that they owled him? Without warning, and for what reason Remus didn't know, a tear leaked out of his eyes and slid down his face. His confusion turned to anger, and his eyes leaked out more tears; angry, livid tears. He looked at the parchment again, glaring at it as if his eyes would make it burn. Then, without his touch, it magically ripped onto the table next to his bed. He swept the little pieces off the table and they scattered on the floor.

The more Remus thought about his parents letter, the angrier he got. He crying so hard of anger by now, he didn't notice Lily Evens walk in.

"Remus?" she said softly, walking over to his bed. Even though her voice was calm, it still held the hint of worry. Remus, startled, looked up and wiped his face with his right sleeve. He took a few deep breathes to regain his composure, before he spoke to Lily.

"Remus, what's wrong? You're upset." She said, taking a seat in a chair she summoned to her. Remus looked up at her, hoping his face wasn't as red as it felt. He was so embarrassed that the prettiest girl in his year had seen his meltdown. It could have been worse, she could have seen him in his...well earlier this week.

Remus didn't answer. He just sat there on his bed, looking out the window. There was a long awkward silence. Remus wondered what she thought of him, crying like a baby. She wouldn't have understood why he was so worked up over a letter from his parents. Besides, the first day they had met, that night on the train, he had told her that his parents died in a house fire not too long ago.

Lily broke the silence. "How are you doing? You've been sick all week. Madam Jiggle wouldn't let anybody see you until this afternoon. James and the rest of your gang have been really worried. Are you alright?"

"Yea I'm fine. I just get sick a lot. You'll see how often I'll miss classes because of this illness I've got." he answered, still trying to dry his face. Wanting to change the subject he added, "How did you do that summoning charm? Isn't that like 3rd year level?"

"4th, actually. I read it over the summer, and Professor flitwick and I discussed it Tuesday afternoon. I needed extra work and he helped me." She looked down at the floor. "What is this parchment torn up for?" She took out her wand and muttered "reparo!"

"No! Don't do that!" Remus shouted

Lily gave him a look of confusion as the ripped pieces flew back together, mending themselves. She picked up the paper and Remus tried to grab it from her. She tried to read the parchment. She paused and let Remus take his letter back. She must have read the words that he didn't want her to read.

"Love mom and dad?" She questioned him, her emerald eyes full of hurt locking with Remus's almond ones. "You told me they died in a house fire."

Remus looked at his fingers. After a few moments, he replied with "I wish they did."

Lily let out a short gasp. "That's really horrible Remus."

"Not really." he said shortly. He plopped his head down on the pillow and rubbed his eyes so hard he saw blue, green, and yellow stars and stripes.

"So.." Lily shuffled her foot on the floor. "What did your parents do?"

"I'd rather not talk about" he replied still rubbing his eyes watching the star show behind his eyelids.

"Ok" she said softly.

Remus let his eyes go back to normal as he opened them. For a few moments he just laid there, Lily by his side. She kept watching him, breathing. She was so pretty. But he knew he didn't have a chance with her. Plus, he could tell James liked her too, and if she had to choose between him and James, he knew she would say James in a heartbeat.

After a few minutes, Lily took his hand and whispered, "Remus, you can tell me anything. I want you to know that. You can trust me with any secret you've got. I won't think any less of you, no matter what." Remus looked into her green eyes again. They looked like a pair of emerald earrings, glistening as she gave him a fully confident gaze. Her ginger hair fell in front of her face, hiding her left emerald of an eye. This made Remus's insides feel all squirmy.

"I-I can't Lily." he said. Lily lowered her head a little. "It's not that I don't trust you, Lily. You just got to bear with me. I'll let you know my story when I'm ready to let someone know it, and when you're ready to hear it.

Lily looked up again, their eyes now locked. "I'm ready now." she assured him.

"No, you're not. There's a bigger secret behind what really happened with my parents. It's too much to spill on one heart, even one as big as yours. Even if you could bear to take it, I'm not ready to let anyone else know. I've got to learn to deal with it and accept it before I can expect you to accept it. I'll be ok, don't you worry." Remus returned Lily the assuring look.

"Ok," She said, squeezing his hand. "I understand." She let go of his hand and stood up. She turned to go, and when she got to the doors of the hospital wing, she said, "I'll be here when your ready Remus. Weather it be tomorrow, or the last day of our 7th year. I'll be ready to listen, and to accept whatever it is you wish me to accept."

"Thanks, Lily"

She flashed him a smile as bright as her hair and swished around, only to run smack into James's chest. "Oy Evens, if that's how you feel, don't you think we should go talk somewhere privately? I mean, "he shrugged, "These are the guys!"

"Oh Potter you're so obnoxious." she shoved James out of the way and walked past Sirius and Peter, who were snickering.

"James, you're really cruel did, you know that?" Remus stated, sitting up once again for more visitors. By now he had forgotten all about his homework assignments. It wasn't until he spotted the feather way up on the ceiling that he remembered what he was doing before Lily, and before the letter.

"Thanks," James said, jumping onto the foot of Remus's hospital bed. "So what's up? Why've you been out all week"

"Yea and why wouldn't Madam Jiggle let us see you till this afternoon?" Said Sirius, also taking a seat at the foot of the bed. Peter plopped down on the chair that Lily had been sitting in. Remus wished she was still sitting there.

"Hey what was Evans talking about?" Said James, yawning and leaning back on the chair.

"Yea what do you want her to accept?" Sirius said, taking the extra pillow and smacking James with it.

"Yea what! We want to know!" Peter squeaked in.

Remus watched James and Sirius's pillow fight with a raised eyebrow. "It was nothing. She was just trying to get me to open up to her about being sick and stuff. Listen you guys, I'm going to be sick a lot. Just, do me a favor and don't ask questions ok?

James didn't listen. "What's wrong? Come one you got to tell us."

"Yea man, we're your friends." said Sirius, meaningfully. Then switching to a sarcastic tone, he added, "It hurts you won't tell us what's wrong with you!" He clutched his heart and put on his best pained expression on his face.

"Yea tell us!" Peter squeaked. He jumped onto the bed with the rest of the guys, face to face with Remus.

Remus, still having a bit of a mean streak in him from his illness, glared at Peter. He was getting mad that they wouldn't leave him alone after he had asked them to. Before he could think about what he was doing , he gave Peter a little shove. "If you don't get out of my face and stop begging me to tell you, I'll personally give you my illness and then you'll be sorry!" He snarled. Peter was now on the floor. He had fallen off the bed due to Remus's little shove.

James and Sirius looked appalled. Both thinking the same thing, they decided to leave Remus to rest. If he had it in him to push Peter off the bed, it may not be a good idea to try to yank the secret out of him. The three boys exited the hospital wing, bidding Remus a good night, and that they'll come check on him the next afternoon.

Remus spent the rest of that day and the next on his lessons he had missed that week. Around lunch time on Friday Afternoon, Madam Jiggle had allowed Remus to go eat lunch in the Great Hall. As he sauntered in, everyone at all four tables looked at him. Whispers began to break out, complete with pointing.