Ladies' Luck
Chapter 1
One day, Meg was going thru another typical day at James Woods High School. She was walking down the hall by herself, and she saw girls from "the populars", led by Connie Demico, talking by a locker. They were talking about guys. Meg went up to them and told them that she liked guys, too. There was a brief moment of silence, as they expected Meg to leave, but Meg stayed, eagerly waiting a response. Then one girl scoffed at her. She then talked about how "the populars" only speak to girls with girlfriends, that of which [they didn't know that] Meg possessed. Meg then spoke up and told them that she's still going out with Jeff, the nudist she met. Another girl asked if Neil was still lusting after her. Meg answered, claiming that she could care less about "that geek".
At that time, Neil was opening his locker, to reveal a secret shrine of Meg Griffin that he had been keeping. He sighed, hoping for the day where Meg would ask for his hand in marriage, that of which seemed highly unlikely.
Connie spoke up, and said that they only talk to girls with REAL boyfriends. She was still going out with Doug. She then dissed Meg, and all the girls laughed and walked off. Meg just sighed forlornly.
Later that day, when Meg came home, she noticed a bunch of holes in the walls. They were scattered across the living room, and led upstairs. Then, the bulk of the holes led right to her room. What happened? Well, Peter was having a showdown...with a fly! Meg screamed at what Peter was doing. Peter then explained that this is what happens when annoying insects mess with his food. A brief flashback revealed Peter about to bite into a bologna, ham, salami, and cucumber sandwich with honey mustard. A fly landed on his sandwich. Peter just glared at the fly with ominous eyes, as he took out a large rifle... Meg then started crying, as Peter left the room slowly. Just then, the fly landed on his nose. Peter loaded his gun, and aimed. As Meg was still crying in her room, the gun went off.
Later, in the evening, the Griffins were watching TV on the family couch. Peter had his whole face wrapped with bandages. They were watching an episode of "My Wife and Kids". In the episode, Michael was trying to ask the kids how to get his wife the right birthday present. Just then, a little kid named Franklin came in. He started by playing Mozart on the piano. Then, he went over to the couch, where the kids were, and kissed Kady. Franklin then asked Michael what was wrong. Michael told him how he was trying to think of how to earn a diamond necklace for his wife's birthday. He then said that she would file for divorce if he didn't get it. Franklin then started to give Michael some advice, but turned it into a really corny joke. Nobody was laughing; all that could be heard were the crickets. Michael made an evil glare on his face...He grabbed Franklin, took him into the bathroom, and flushed him down the toilet. He then grabbed his coat and headed out the door, deciding then to take his chances at the nearest casino. Brain saw this scenario, and commented that "they finally gave that little fugger what he deserved". Chris then said that Claire, the teenage daughter, was hot.
Just then, Meg came out of her room in her pajamas. She came downstairs to get a glass of milk. She was really tired and downtrodden. Lois then saw Meg, and asked what was wrong with her. Peter tried to speak, but all he was doing was mumbling something that nobody could understand. Stewie then said that se must have finally been doing what everyone had dreamed of: going lesbian. Meg came out the kitchen with a whole carton of milk, and just went back to her room. Stewie then made a wise-crack about her practicing for a porno video. Everyone just burst out laughing. Peter mumbled something else under his bandages. Just then, the same fly came, landing on Peter's nose again. Peter grabbed a cattle prod. The house lit up, as a large glowing zap filled the living room, accompanied by Peter howling in pain.
(to be continued...)