A/N GAAAHHHH!!!!!!!! I HAD REVIEWS!!! WOOT! My dear sweet wonderful people,
who read my story, THANK YOU!!!!!!
bEaUtIfUlBrAt: OF course I'll read your fic! And I'll review, Thank you so much for the compliments MWA!!
Marauder Lupin: Here is the next chapter for you, you like my descriptions YAY thank you soooooooooooooo much for reviewing.
If none of you could tell I am extremely excited!! If anyone read this and didn't review I hope enjoyed it, if not tell me why!!
Now onto the story!
Live for My Dying
Chapter Two Exchange Drowning for Breathing
Elspeth stared wistfully at the dim light shining down on her through the water. She'd been playing a chasing game on the end of the pier with the boys; she'd been running backwards and trip on a coil of rope. Both she and the rope had fallen into the deep water, hopelessly tangled together. For what seemed like forever she struggled with the rope, becoming completely disorientated.
Finally free of the rope, relief swimming through her veins, she had swum as fast as she could. Eyes tightly clenched closed, she had expected to break the surface at any second. She had wondered briefly why it was getting so cold and dark. Finally her lungs burning, she had opened her eyes... to darkness. Terrified the air burst from her lungs, the bubbles flew upwards and she turned with them, and had seen the sun.
The light was dim, it was so far, too far, she couldn't reach it. Her oxygen starved brain registered only gentle sadness at this, but a corner of her mind suddenly screamed. Wait! This has happened before, don't be sad daddy jumped in and saved me! It's alright he'll be here any second now!
And so Elspeth waited, but the light went out. Daddy wasn't coming, a new voice said, daddy's dead. And suddenly Elspeth's mind, stunned from the impact with the water cleared. She remembered, and for a moment all that mattered was breathing. She kicked her legs crazily, her dress had become water logged and was pulling her down. She tried to use her arms but they were still tied. It was so dark; she had no way of knowing how far she was from the surface.
Her tears merged with the salt water and her kicking slowed,
"What's the point?" she said silently
"Come on your almost there," she heard his voice, even though she knew it wasn't possible.
She kicked strongly once, twice and once more, and her head broke the surface. Cool, fresh wonderful air filled her lungs, but the aching in her chest didn't subside no matter how many times she drew the sweet air down her throat.
Bobbing up and down next to her was the tar bucket; she kicked towards it reaching out for it. She realised then that she still held the small knife clenched in her bound hands. Looping her arms around the bucket, she used her elbows to balance it close to her. Shocked at how close she was coming to swamping it with the added weight of her waterlogged dress, she kicked strenuously to keep her head above the water.
Looking around she saw the ships, far too close for comfort. Hoping the darkness would conceal her, she kicked herself away from it careful not to make any splashes. She pushed all thought of what might be lurking in the dark water beneath her, along with the voice of reason telling her that all that waited for in the open ocean was death.
Only when she thought she was far enough away did she look back. There was a light growing on her father's ship. It took her a moment to realise it was a fire, and by the time she did it had spread across the deck and was licking at the main mast. The sight of one of her father's fine ships burning, made the pain in her chest constrict, but with the constriction came a hardening.
Now was not the time for grief, it was the time for survival, if that was possible. He was dead, but he had died so that she would live. For her to die now would be to throw his sacrifice back in his face. She would do anything to be worthy of his gift.
She swam further so that the light from the burning ship wouldn't give her away. Finally when the two ships were small points in the distance she stopped and began to cut at the ropes at her wrists. With her wrists finally free she let the knife and the rope drop into the bucket and shucked out her dress, leaving her freezing in just her shift, but much more buoyant.
Now floating comfortably, she relaxed her grip on her thoughts just a little, so that she could think a ways into the future.
"Maybe," she thought to herself, "I'll get found and picked up by another merchant man, or a naval vessel"
"More likely, I'll die of starvation... Although thirst probably will come first," the thought popped into her head and suddenly as if it had opened a floodgate, it was joined may many more like it.
"Maybe I freeze first," suddenly she felt very, very cold. She found herself wishing she had left the dress on.
"I might get picked off buy some sort of sea beast," this charming thought made her imagine she felt something brush past her ankle.
"Or I'll fall asleep and lose the bucket," she yawned widely, and then was suddenly angry with herself. She couldn't do this, she'd drive herself mad!
Reaching into the bucket she pulled out the rope and tied one end tightly around her wrist and the other around the handle of the wooden bucket.
"There!" she said aloud in an accusing voice, "Does that satisfy you?"
Realising what she had just done, she sighed frustrated and tired. She would have given anything, right then, just to sleep a heavy dreamless sleep. Resting her chin on the rim of the bucket, she settled down for a long wait. A wait she wasn't sure she'd see the end of.
The sun high overhead played over her like fire. Her shoulders ached where her shift ended and she longed to sink beneath the cool water, but every time she tried, the voice in her head would come alive and sharply tell her not to. Next time her feverish mind mumbled next time I will ignore the voice, I will ignore and I will stop the burning.
Still each time, the voice had piped up again and she couldn't ignore it, each time she had held onto the bucket and continued to burn. But not this time, voice be damned she was a crisp and she wanted to cool down! She made to let go of the bucket, but as soon as she did the voice began again in her ear.
"Leave me alone," she croaked her voice thick and rough. The voice stilled
Slowly she released her grip on the bucket and the water close gently over her head, it was so lovely. She pushed herself down deeper, so that she could reached the cooler water at her feet. All of a sudden the bucket flipped and something shiny fell down past her face. By the time her muddled mind realised what it was, it had already slipped well past her feet.
The knife! She mustn't lose the knife! Sluggishly she tried to swim after it but some thing held her back, she struggled furiously against it, stretching with all her might to reach the knife, but the bucket had flipped fully over, trapping a large air bubble inside it. It was going to let her get far underwater.
Two voices argued in her mind. One screamed at her to get the knife, which had by now slipped completely out of sight, the other told her firmly to go back to the bucket. The second voice strengthened by the physical force holding her back by her wrist eventually won out over the first. She surfaced and returned to the bucket which, when flipped back the right way, now contained a small amount of water.
The sound of the water sloshing in the bucket reminded her how thirsty she was, the water in the bucket looked so good, even if it was saltwater, just a little bit couldn't hurt could it. The same voice that had made her return to the bucket scolded her sharply and told her not to drink the water.
A sob escaped her throat, followed by another and soon she was crying in earnest. She cried because the voice wouldn't leave her alone. She cried because she was thirsty and because the sun was burning her again. Also she cried for a sorrow that she couldn't remember a fact which made her cry worse, because she should remember. This sorrow was a part of her. It was her. It had been baked into a stone in her heart, where it lay heavily slowly expanding through her whole body. She should remember it!
The sobs tore at her throat choking her. She wanted it to stop, but the voice wouldn't let her go; the sorrow wouldn't let her go.
bEaUtIfUlBrAt: OF course I'll read your fic! And I'll review, Thank you so much for the compliments MWA!!
Marauder Lupin: Here is the next chapter for you, you like my descriptions YAY thank you soooooooooooooo much for reviewing.
If none of you could tell I am extremely excited!! If anyone read this and didn't review I hope enjoyed it, if not tell me why!!
Now onto the story!
Live for My Dying
Chapter Two Exchange Drowning for Breathing
Elspeth stared wistfully at the dim light shining down on her through the water. She'd been playing a chasing game on the end of the pier with the boys; she'd been running backwards and trip on a coil of rope. Both she and the rope had fallen into the deep water, hopelessly tangled together. For what seemed like forever she struggled with the rope, becoming completely disorientated.
Finally free of the rope, relief swimming through her veins, she had swum as fast as she could. Eyes tightly clenched closed, she had expected to break the surface at any second. She had wondered briefly why it was getting so cold and dark. Finally her lungs burning, she had opened her eyes... to darkness. Terrified the air burst from her lungs, the bubbles flew upwards and she turned with them, and had seen the sun.
The light was dim, it was so far, too far, she couldn't reach it. Her oxygen starved brain registered only gentle sadness at this, but a corner of her mind suddenly screamed. Wait! This has happened before, don't be sad daddy jumped in and saved me! It's alright he'll be here any second now!
And so Elspeth waited, but the light went out. Daddy wasn't coming, a new voice said, daddy's dead. And suddenly Elspeth's mind, stunned from the impact with the water cleared. She remembered, and for a moment all that mattered was breathing. She kicked her legs crazily, her dress had become water logged and was pulling her down. She tried to use her arms but they were still tied. It was so dark; she had no way of knowing how far she was from the surface.
Her tears merged with the salt water and her kicking slowed,
"What's the point?" she said silently
"Come on your almost there," she heard his voice, even though she knew it wasn't possible.
She kicked strongly once, twice and once more, and her head broke the surface. Cool, fresh wonderful air filled her lungs, but the aching in her chest didn't subside no matter how many times she drew the sweet air down her throat.
Bobbing up and down next to her was the tar bucket; she kicked towards it reaching out for it. She realised then that she still held the small knife clenched in her bound hands. Looping her arms around the bucket, she used her elbows to balance it close to her. Shocked at how close she was coming to swamping it with the added weight of her waterlogged dress, she kicked strenuously to keep her head above the water.
Looking around she saw the ships, far too close for comfort. Hoping the darkness would conceal her, she kicked herself away from it careful not to make any splashes. She pushed all thought of what might be lurking in the dark water beneath her, along with the voice of reason telling her that all that waited for in the open ocean was death.
Only when she thought she was far enough away did she look back. There was a light growing on her father's ship. It took her a moment to realise it was a fire, and by the time she did it had spread across the deck and was licking at the main mast. The sight of one of her father's fine ships burning, made the pain in her chest constrict, but with the constriction came a hardening.
Now was not the time for grief, it was the time for survival, if that was possible. He was dead, but he had died so that she would live. For her to die now would be to throw his sacrifice back in his face. She would do anything to be worthy of his gift.
She swam further so that the light from the burning ship wouldn't give her away. Finally when the two ships were small points in the distance she stopped and began to cut at the ropes at her wrists. With her wrists finally free she let the knife and the rope drop into the bucket and shucked out her dress, leaving her freezing in just her shift, but much more buoyant.
Now floating comfortably, she relaxed her grip on her thoughts just a little, so that she could think a ways into the future.
"Maybe," she thought to herself, "I'll get found and picked up by another merchant man, or a naval vessel"
"More likely, I'll die of starvation... Although thirst probably will come first," the thought popped into her head and suddenly as if it had opened a floodgate, it was joined may many more like it.
"Maybe I freeze first," suddenly she felt very, very cold. She found herself wishing she had left the dress on.
"I might get picked off buy some sort of sea beast," this charming thought made her imagine she felt something brush past her ankle.
"Or I'll fall asleep and lose the bucket," she yawned widely, and then was suddenly angry with herself. She couldn't do this, she'd drive herself mad!
Reaching into the bucket she pulled out the rope and tied one end tightly around her wrist and the other around the handle of the wooden bucket.
"There!" she said aloud in an accusing voice, "Does that satisfy you?"
Realising what she had just done, she sighed frustrated and tired. She would have given anything, right then, just to sleep a heavy dreamless sleep. Resting her chin on the rim of the bucket, she settled down for a long wait. A wait she wasn't sure she'd see the end of.
The sun high overhead played over her like fire. Her shoulders ached where her shift ended and she longed to sink beneath the cool water, but every time she tried, the voice in her head would come alive and sharply tell her not to. Next time her feverish mind mumbled next time I will ignore the voice, I will ignore and I will stop the burning.
Still each time, the voice had piped up again and she couldn't ignore it, each time she had held onto the bucket and continued to burn. But not this time, voice be damned she was a crisp and she wanted to cool down! She made to let go of the bucket, but as soon as she did the voice began again in her ear.
"Leave me alone," she croaked her voice thick and rough. The voice stilled
Slowly she released her grip on the bucket and the water close gently over her head, it was so lovely. She pushed herself down deeper, so that she could reached the cooler water at her feet. All of a sudden the bucket flipped and something shiny fell down past her face. By the time her muddled mind realised what it was, it had already slipped well past her feet.
The knife! She mustn't lose the knife! Sluggishly she tried to swim after it but some thing held her back, she struggled furiously against it, stretching with all her might to reach the knife, but the bucket had flipped fully over, trapping a large air bubble inside it. It was going to let her get far underwater.
Two voices argued in her mind. One screamed at her to get the knife, which had by now slipped completely out of sight, the other told her firmly to go back to the bucket. The second voice strengthened by the physical force holding her back by her wrist eventually won out over the first. She surfaced and returned to the bucket which, when flipped back the right way, now contained a small amount of water.
The sound of the water sloshing in the bucket reminded her how thirsty she was, the water in the bucket looked so good, even if it was saltwater, just a little bit couldn't hurt could it. The same voice that had made her return to the bucket scolded her sharply and told her not to drink the water.
A sob escaped her throat, followed by another and soon she was crying in earnest. She cried because the voice wouldn't leave her alone. She cried because she was thirsty and because the sun was burning her again. Also she cried for a sorrow that she couldn't remember a fact which made her cry worse, because she should remember. This sorrow was a part of her. It was her. It had been baked into a stone in her heart, where it lay heavily slowly expanding through her whole body. She should remember it!
The sobs tore at her throat choking her. She wanted it to stop, but the voice wouldn't let her go; the sorrow wouldn't let her go.