Author's Note: Hey guys here is chapter 5. Enjoy and please review! The story should pick up a little after this chapter. And someone said that they don't know when this is happening and I realized that they are right! I'll either have to revise a previous chapter or put it into a later chapter, but THIS chapter is not the place for it. It's supposed to take place sometime next seanson when Marco would be in Grade 11.

Chapter 5: Just a Little While Longer

Marco's papa dragged him to the middle of the kitchen floor. Everything had turned to black and white. Marco stood there in his kitchen, shivering and whimpering. When had his house gotten so cold?

Marco's father went into the living room and came out holding a baseball bat. As his father beat him, Marco looked up so he wouldn't have to see his papa's enraged face. He focused on one tiny stain on the ceiling, one spot. That one spot was the whole world.

"Marco...." his mother's voice was calling him from very far away.

"Mama," Marco whispered, his voice cracking. He burst into a fresh wave of tears.

"Marco..."

"Marco! Wake up!" his mother was shaking him awake. Marco sat up. "What's wrong?" his mother asked "You cry very loud."

Marco was awake, but still half wild from the dream. "Oh Mama," he cried, "I'm sorry, I'm so sorry."

"Sorry for what baby?" his mother asked looking at him with a confused expression.

"I'm sorry," Marco sobbed, "I can't keep doing this, I just can't."

"It's okay Marco," said his mama, "it was only a dream."

She took him in her arms and began to gently rock him and sing to him in Italian. Marco's mother always treated him as if he were five years old. Normally, he hated it, but tonight it was exactly what he needed. Marco was transported to his childhood. When he was small, he had always had horrible dreams. Then, he could run into his parents room and his mama would sooth and sing to him and his papa would chase the monsters from under his bed. That was back when he actually liked his parents as people and didn't just love them out of obligation. Back when they were the center of his little world and he had no secrets from him. That was before his papa became the monster.

But now? Marco wondered. He wondered how his mother would react if he told her everything. About his being gay, about Dylan, about his dreams. Would her face change to shock and disgust? Would she cry? Would she tell his papa? Would she, could she....understand?

Whatever the answers to these questions were, Marco knew that he couldn't keep this up much longer. The lying, the sneaking around, the nightmares, the lack of sleep. He just wasn't built for it, if nothing else, Marco had to tell his parents in order to preserve his sanity. Telling Dylan had helped, but only temporarily. When Marco hadn't had his dreams for almost three weeks, he had thought that they were gone for good. Then, on night they came back, more horrible and more vivid than ever. Now he was back to having dreams nearly every night. Yes, telling Dylan had been a quick fix, like people who take asprins when what they really need is major surgery.

And yet...telling his parents could wait. He could allow them to live in their perfect little world where he was the perfect son for just a few days longer. Surely he could have their full love for just a little while longer. Marco was falling asleep.

"Goodnight Mama," Marco said drowsily, "I love you."