Kathrine: We're back!
JC: Okay, we've had a very stressful last two weeks. We're not going to get into right now, but just know that, rather than have our work suffer, we decided to take a step back to relax and get through some things first.
Kathrine: Yeah, and we actually got our first real Flame. Someone complained that Blood-bonding was disgusting and unhygienic. We were actually mad that our first flame was so pathetic since Elves can't get sick anyway.
JC: We do want to thank Eressë again for being so nice and giving us advice.
Kathrine: This chapter is short, but that's only because we decided to see how Legolas' sons are doing and their ways of dealing with the situation.
JC: It just ended in a good place. So we hope you enjoy it!
Warnings: Slash, Fluff, Sexual Tension, Angst
Disclaimer: We do NOT own LOTR or anything affiliated with it. But we do own the Twin Legolasiond and Ithinor.
Weight of the Burden
By Jennifer and JC
Chapter 7
Andúnel knew something had happened. He could feel the strange bond the he and his brother shared with his father. Before, it had been dormant, empty in a way that left them feeling as if a wall had been erected between themselves and their adar. They had been unable to reach his spirit. But now… His spirit was alive, golden, but tired and weak, though in a good way. They succeeded, he realized. I only hope that all three of them have at last settled this century-long run-around.
He entered the healing wing, carrying the meal that the kitchen maids had provided for him and Glorfindel. Some had been awake, a few doing stock and inventory, while others were gathering the needed supplies for preparing the next morning meal. He had not realized how truly late it was. Thankfully, they were very kind about him asking for an early meal, seeing as it was still three or more hours until they would break fast.
He had then been approached by Queen Arwen, seeking to know if her husband was still watching over Legolas. She explained to him that, after telling him of Legolas' condition, she had bee able to calm him down and send him to his chambers until early morning. She had then praised her grandmother, Galadriel's, influence over the stalwart Dwarf. He told her that Aragorn had gone looking for her, and of what her brothers had gone to do. Not so much to his surprise, she gave him a knowing smile and said that she knew they would follow their hearts.
Leave it to the queen, he thought. She would know of all that goes one within her walls and beyond.
" Andúnel," Glorfindel was waiting for him at the door into the separate hall. The younger twin thought it odd that he was not waiting at the door to his father's room as he said he would.
" What has happened?" he inquired.
Glorfindel gave a weak chuckle, steering the auburn-haired Edhel away from aforementioned hall. " Nothing," he assured him. " Although, I thought it best that they receive more privacy."
" So we shall wait out here?" the twin was not sure he was pleased with this turn of events.
" It will only be for a short while," the blonde told him. " Believe me, it is best that we do not disturbed them."
" So they are…?" Andúnel could feel a blush beginning to cover his face. So far, he had remained controlled around the golden Balrog Slayer, but at the thought of his father -his fathers- performing that rather intimate act… He could not deny that he felt somewhat uncomfortable. It was awkward to think of someone who had given birth to you and raised you in such a way. Not to mention quite embarrassing.
The pale blonde elf gave a loud laugh, his jade green eyes sparkling. " Surely you have never been one of such bashfulness," he stated. " It is not as if you have never tasted the fruits of the flesh for yourself. You are young but far enough past your majority."
To hear the one he had such affection for speaking of his love life only caused him to cough, almost dropping the platter of bread, cheese and fruit and the bottle of light wine he carried. Glorfindel laughed once again, surprised by the way the young one was acting and took the large plate away from him, setting it on a small table in the corner. He turned back and saw the look upon the other's face as he sat down in a chair beside said table.
" Ai, Amin hiraetha," Glorfindel apologized, sitting across from him. " I truly did not mean to make you feel so uncomfortable. I had not known that you…"
" It's all right," he said quickly. " I just have not seen the need to. I…have not found the right person yet."
" Understandable," Glorfindel agreed. " Most look for their first to be a special, memorable time with someone you care for or know will not take advantage of you."
" You…speak as if someone who knows," he remarked. Ai, Elbereth, he thought. I am not talking about this with him…with Glorfindel! But at the same time he was curious. Who had been the golden-haired Elf's first? Had he cared deeply for him or her? Or had it merely been someone he knew he could trust?
" That is because I do," he replied. " Do not think me so elderly that I have lost my 'older' memories, even those of my 'first' time upon Arda."
" I do not," he said, almost a little too hastily. " I just believe you are the sort of Edhel that would not choose such things lightly. I…would believe you to be bound to the one you gave your heart to." But he knew that Glorfindel was not bound. He did not see the signs in his eyes. He saw age, wisdom, compassion, understanding, but he did not seethe signs of a wed Elf.
The blonde stared at him for a moment, searching his eyes far something that Andúnel knew not, but then gave a smile. " You are very observant," he replied. " I knew that about you when we first met. While your brother is a tactician, when his ire is not raised, you are the more calm and watchful of you both. Yet, you are also the one who is more willing to take risks, so…"
" I know," Andúnel finally felt himself beginning to relax in the presence of his secret affection (though to him It seemed more like a near-affliction). " Many have wondered over our personalities. They believe that our minds were jumbled like broken eggs and then split between us while still in our Adar's womb. We're not sure."
" It could be the similarity between your auras," the blonde mentioned. " No twins I have before known, though they are rare, have such equality and symmetry in every aspect of their spirits. Even your fath- Elladan and Elrohir have a difference, letting you sense that halving of their soul between each other."
" It is all right," Andúnel assured him. " I am not as angry as I was, neither is Amun, even if he is not so sure. Though I am still somewhat angry at them, and perhaps even a little at my Ada as well, I am beginning to understand how this all came about."
" Legolas?" Glorfindel raised a curious brow.
" Each of them shares part of the blame," he sighed. " Though I admit that we are far more upset by the twins' reaction to all of this and how it has affected our father. They lied to each other, hid how they felt for so long and my father… We have always known that something was wrong, a thin shadow that veiled his thoughts and heart so many times when we would find him sitting in his room, staring off into space, or so tired that he would need to rest immediately. He hid it well under the pretense of the effects of our earlier birth…and we have only heard stories of Elves who succumbed to Grief."
" Do not put the fault upon yourself," Glorfindel told him. " None looked closely enough to see the truths. You could not have known, for as you yourself pointed out…you have never actually seen the affects of the Elven Sickness."
Andúnel didn't know how to explain it, seeing as hearing such comforting words come from others usually did very little to assuage his feelings (save when they came from his gwanunig or from his father), but when the words came from Glorfindel…he did actually feel them. And at the same time they also left him feeling the heat rising in his skin upon his face, neck, and ears.
This is worst than I first believed, he thought apprehensively. How can you feel so strongly for someone you barely know? The stories I have been told all of my life…do not do him justice. He's so much more… He's unbelievable.
" Andúnel?" Glorfindel touched his arm, bringing him back to the present, and sending a strange sensation up and down the aforementioned limb.
" I…was wondering of who it was that could have been worthy enough to be your first," he said, not truly thinking of what he was saying, save trying to shift the attention from himself. When he did realize what he had spoken, he was once again fighting to keep the embarrassed flush from showing upon his face.
" I am flattered you think so highly of me," Glorfindel chuckled. " But he was a far worthier Edhel than I. He was strong, in both body and spirit, loyal, determined, a true friend to a fault, and had been someone I had admired and cared deeply for since I was an Elfling."
" You, an Elfling?" Andúnel tried to be somewhat humorous, knowing he could not pass up such an opening.
Glorfindel laughed once more. " Yes, that WAS quite some time ago," he agreed. " But he had been a mentor for me, even though he came from a different House than I. Ecthelion, to me, had been on a different level than any other."
" Ecthelion?" the younger Edhel repeated. " Was he not the Lord of the Fountain in Gondolin who slew the Balrog Lord and was slain by it as well?"
" Aye," he nodded. " Though I always knew that, though I loved him and he succored as a child, in many ways, his heart always belonged to another. I also know now that my love for him was indeed like the naïve love of a child, for while it has never abated, it is not the love that would bind two souls together for eternity. He was dear to me, dearer than a friend, dearer than a brother, dearer than a parent, and in ways dearer than a lover, but it was still not the right type of love for soul-bound."
" You say that he was taken by another," Andúnel curiosity was peaked.
" Yes," Glorfindel nodded. " For who could have held his heart, devotion, loyalty, and friendship better than his king?" He then stood, placing a gentle hand on the auburn-haired Edhel's shoulder. " Do not dwell too much over such things. If you truly wish to wait for someone who you believe is special or who you believe your intended, than do so. But much time is wasted if you believe in the wrong person or if you are too unsure about the right one."
He then picked up the tray of food, which they had barely touched, and headed out of the healing wing. " I shall return this to the kitchen, for we have not eaten much and morning meal shall come soon enough," he turned to him. " The king shall show up within the next hour or so, but it is best that your fathers remain undisturbed until at least the sun has risen."
" All right," he nodded as he watched the golden-haired Edhel leave. He then leaned back in the chair he sat in and let out a deep sigh. Already he could feel the blush he had been trying so hard to hide coming forth, turning his face a deep shade of red. They had talked so openly, like two who had known each other for centuries. And yet, he still felt as if the blonde was so far above him.
Is this merely the love a child would hold for someone they admired? he questioned. No, it would not keep such a hold over me if it were only that. Just the sight of him, the sound of his voice, everything about him…it leaves me feeling as if I need to throw myself into the Anduin, so consumed am I by the burning need. He then gave a short, dry chuckle. And it was he who gave me advice about my feelings.
He suddenly felt the blankness over half his mind. At first he was worried, but now then he calmed himself. Amúntel had blocked his mind from his elder twin for some reason, though he probably could tell why. He could no block all of the emotions he was feeling. The strange sensations caused him to blush once more. Well… he sighed again, at least one of us is getting somewhere.
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He stopped his assault, his chest heaving and his arm shaking from the exertion. Amúntel had not gone to bathe, but merely cleaned the blood and dirt from his hands and face. Afterwards, he had gone to find Ithinor, who had been awake in his chambers. Instead of fully explaining what had occurred, for he knew not how to do so, he had dragged the elder warrior outside to spar with him. As of now, it was becoming more relaxing, a way to settle his torrent thoughts and unusually insecure mind.
" Are you tired yet, pen-neth?" The raven-haired Edhel inquired.
" Not really." he gave a half-lie. " I just want to keep going. Needed the release."
Ithinor lowered his sword and the twin lowered his long knives, a gift both he and his brother had received from their father upon their passing of majority. The dark brown eyes stared into his own, searching them. " What is wrong, Amun?" he finally asked. " Something has happened, but not to Andúnel, for you would most assuredly not be out here with me. Has something happened to your father?"
The auburn-haired twin knew that he had to tell his mentor the truth. He had been a dear friend of his father's for very long and, even though he could feel that his father was no longer in danger, he knew that Ithinor would be worried until he told him something. " He- Adar is - WAS - fading from Grief, the Elven Sickness," he finally managed to get the words out, though they were forced as if they had been choking him within his throat.
" What?" The dark-haired Edhel was frozen by his words. " Lhiw-Edhellen? But, how is that possible? We would have known… For how long?"
Amúntel sighed, his eyes staring off at nothing. " Since before my brother and I were born."
" Law," Ithinor could believe it. " You can sense the comings of grief. We would have known."
" He hid it, masked its presence, from everyone," the younger gwanunig replied. " If he had not collapsed last evening…"
Ithinor interrupted him. " Collapsed?"
" Yes, Andúnel and I believed it to be the fatigue, but even that was false," his hands were beginning to hurt form how tight he held his knives. " The Grief… It has always been there, and he merely said that the fatigue he felt, the times he would lose himself, was due to our premature birth and the difficulties he faced during and afterwards."
" How could we not have known?" Ithinor sighed, moving to settle himself against one of the trees in the yard.
" T'would not have mattered, either way," the twin told him. " He was determined to face this alone, hiding his broken heart for as long as he lived."
" What do you mean 'broken heart'?" Ithinor asked him. " And why do you continued to say 'WAS'. There has been a dark tension surrounding this place since early evening, what has transpired?"
" Father…almost let go tonight…nearly gave in to his grief," Amúntel dropped to the ground beside his mentor, his eyes ever looking anywhere but at the elder Elf. " But now we have the truth about everything. Elladan and Elrohir know the truth…"
" You speak in jumbles," Ithinor stopped him. " Please, pen-neth, start at the beginning, from you knowledge. I wish to know everything and it seems that you need someone to speak to. Your spirit is heavily weighed by your worries and uncertainties. Where is Andúnel?"
" Andúnel…cannot help me with this," he explained. " We both feel this. T'would do no good for us to seek each other for understanding. We both need outside views. And he has someone who I know will help him."
" You are so somber, so cut off," Ithinor placed a comforting hand on the auburn-haired Edhel's leg. " Please, feel free to rant, worry, spout off anything, or even cry if you believe it would help. I cannot bear to see you in such depressing straits. Never before have you been so and I think it best that you do not start now."
Amúntel gave a weak laugh. If there was one thing that he adored about this Elf, it was how he was so willing to share the burden of another's sorrow. Ever had the other been someone who he could depend on, look up to, adore simply because he was kind, yet strong and firm when he needed to be. Since his majority, they had flirted playfully, but never enough for him to be sure what Ithinor actually wanted. Maybe now was the time to find out, he had learned that much from the ordeal, not to wait, lest something take away the only chance you have.
So he opened up to his long-time friend and told him everything. He told him of how he had attacked the human boy in the Stables, how they had been brought before the king. He told him of what had occurred after, the truth of his parentage, and the reactions of Sons of Elrond to the revelation. And he finally managed to speak of his father's Grief and the fear he had of losing him.
" And they are allowing him to fade?!" Ithinor was enraged, jumping to his feet. " I have always believed that the Sons of Elrond were noble and honorable, but now…"
" Nay!" Amúntel stood and placed his arms on the other's should, hoping to calm him some. " I said 'WAS'! Recall that is what I kept saying…'was'. They have realized what has been done. They care for Adar as much as he cares for them! It is they who have saved him!"
" 'Saved him'?" Ithinor visibly settled.
" Aye," he nodded. " I can feel it in my heart…in my soul. He is well now. They have bonded to him."
" If they have reconciled," the dark-haired Elf wondered. " Why are you so angry and confused?"
" That is exactly why I am confused!" he ranted. " I know not how I should feel! I have nearly lost my father this night, found out that my other sires are the Twin Peredhil, which should make myself one as well, and now it seems as if things should be all right, but they are not!" He finally stopped, taking in deep breaths, before sighing. " I feel so…lost."
Ithinor didn't wait long before enveloping him in a comforting embrace. " Now it is you who should calm yourself, Amun," he soothed as he rubbed his back. " But after all that you have told me has transpired this past day, no one should expect you to be able to simply decide how to act in a few short hours, or even a few days. You have much to ponder on."
" I know," Amúntel nodded, trying to keep his feelings down. It was so hard to stay confused, angry, and hurt when he was being held like this by the elder Edhel. Everything was just fading away, leaving only he and Ithinor, locked together. He almost wished he could cuddle him, nuzzle his head against his object of his affection's neck. A deep intake of air finally pulled him from his musings…only to realize that he WAS nuzzling into the other's neck.
" Amun…Amúntel," Ithinor stilled his hand. " What are you doing?"
" Something I have waited decades to do," he murmured, unable to still his ministrations. Instead, he turned his head and breathed in the scent of the Silvan Elf, causing him to shudder when he breathed out.
" You… You shouldn't…" Ithinor started, but was cut off by the lips that overtook his own, seizing them in a way that screamed out what it was that the auburn-haired twin was feeling. The onslaught was too much for the other to handle, as he was overwhelmed and swallowed by the intensity of Amúntel's feelings towards him.
The younger twin would have laughed at how he was dominating the kiss, but was soon shoved back against the tree they had sat under, the control quickly taken from him. A flame was lit in his veins, spreading throughout his body like an untamed forest fire, eating away his resolved with its delicious heat. A questing tongue slid between his open lips, diving into his mouth and taking every inch to detail.
It was by some unknown force of nature (perhaps interference of the Valar themselves) that they were able to release each other, bodies thrumming with pleasure, breaths unstable, eyes alight with emotions they could no longer hide. Amúntel chuckled, his voice dry and soft. " Well…" he started. " If I had known…that you would be such a wonderful kisser…I would have done this sooner."
" Or perhaps 'tis I who should have taken the first step," Ithinor pointed out.
" Nay," Amúntel laughed. " I enjoyed taking you by surprise."
" And surprise me you did," he agreed before capturing the soft mouth of the youth once more. Nothing between them was said for they already knew what it was both would say. They could feel it within them, the understanding and desire that took control. It was no longer a choice, but a NEED for them to accept this.
Amúntel also knew that they would not go any further then the delectable kisses and caresses that left his body chilled for a fire only his love could provide. It was what he needed, an escape from the direct situation that left him too tightly wound and unsteady to catch himself should he fall. No, he would think when his mind was fresh, clearer than right now. At that moment…he had more pleasurable things to do. He barely had enough lucidity to form the block between his brother's mind and his own. This was not something he would share with his twin. Andúnel would die of embarrassment first, he thought offhandedly before being pleasantly drowned in Ithinor's ministrations.
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Translations:
Legolasiond - Sons of Legolas
Adar/Ada - Father/Dad/Daddy
Edhel/Edhil - Elf (sing)/Elves (pl)
Ai, Amin hiraetha - Oh, I am sorry
Gwanunig - Twin (sing. of Gwanûn - a pair of twins)
Pen-neth - Young one
Lhiw-Edhellen - Elven Sickness (Sickness of the Elves)
Law - No
Peredhel/Peredhil - Half-Elf (sing)/Half-Elves (pl)/Half-Elven
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JC: See? This chapter ended where we wanted it.
Kathrine: Actually, we had a different ending, but after out computer suddenly deleted it twice, we decided that it was where it was supposed to be.
JC: Next we will get into the aftermath. Legolas and the Twin Peredhil still have to face the music.
Kathrine: And we added we put more information about Glorfindel into this chapter, just because we love him so much.
JC: And now, please drop us a review and let us known what you think. As long as Real Life doesn't bite us in the butt again…expect a new chapter at the end of the week but before Saturday.
Kathrine: Wes till have to finish a chapter of another story. Everything has been greatly neglected.