Disclaimer - Don't own any of 'em. Except Lindy.

Chapter 15 - Together, But Alone

Michaelangelo looked up from his walk when he heard a car coming down the street. It's gotta be April. He thought happily, and picked up his gait.

"Hey!" He called out, when April stepped out of the car, and she turned and waved to him happily.

"Hi, Mikey!" She walked up to him, where he was holding his arms out for a hug. She obliged, then began walking up to the house with him, arm in arm.

"So," She began. "Where is everyone else?"

"In the house." Mike answered, then smiled. "They just don't appreciate the great outdoors like I do." He said jokingly.

"Mmm hmm." April smiled. "I bet. What are you guys up to?"

"Nothing. Just staying out of trouble, just like you told us to."

She laughed. "Yeah, right. Now really, what's everyone else up to?"

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Leonardo walked down the stairs, rubbing a hand over his forehead. He was exhausted. He'd only slept about two hours the night before, and maybe three the night before. He hadn't done that for… well, it had been almost a year now, hadn't it?

He stumbled into the kitchen, where Don sat, watching Raph try and feed Lindy; an amused smile on his face.

"Hey." Don said, when he saw Leo enter the room.

"Hi." Leo said softly, then sat down at the table. Raph looked over to him, and Lindy grinned, holding her arms out for him.

"Thought you were gonna sleep the whole day away." Raph said, then turned back to the mission at hand, which was making the food actually go into Lindy's mouth.

"Yeah," Leo began. "I don't know what came over me, feeling so tired all the time…"

"Not sleeping for two weeks will do that to you." Don interrupted softly. Both Leo and Raph whipped their heads around to look at him.

"I… I don't, I haven't…" Leo stammered, but had no excuse.

Don shrugged. "Well, it's not like none of us wouldn't have noticed."

"Is this true?" Raph asked, a scowl forming on his face.

"Raph…" Leo began, but stopped, frowning. "Don, this is really not something I want to discuss here." He said lowly.

"But I do." Don sat back in his chair and folded his arms. "This isn't good, Leo, and I want to talk to you about the other week, too, when…"

"Don." Leo hissed through his teeth. "I said not now."

Raph looked between the two, at first confused, then getting angry. He hated being out of the loop like this.

"Either of you two care to tell me what's going on?" He asked.

Don and Leo looked at each other for a few more moments in silence.

"No." Leo said forcefully.

"…No" Don said, softly.

Raphael sighed in frustration. "Fine, you two gonna be that way? Great. Here." He shoved the remainder of Lindy's lunch into Leo's hands. "I'll leave so you two can talk." He spit out, then stormed out of the room.

Mike opened the front door, almost colliding with Raphael when he and April stepped into the room.

"Uh, looks like things are right back to normal." April said, looking up the stairs after Raphael.

"They haven't had a fight in awhile." Mike frowned, but it soon turned back into his trademark half-grin. "Then again," He began. "We were worrying about that too…" He linked arms with April, leading her to the kitchen. "If this is where he came from, then I'm sure that everyone else is surely…" He cut off when they got into the next room.

Don and Leo sat at the table, each one making an effort to not look at the other. The silence was deafening.

"Um, hi." April said finally, and it took a moment for both of them to react. Leo finally looked up at her.

"Hey, April." He said, a tired smile on his face.

Lindy grinned and waved her hands around.

Don looked up a moment later, distracted, like he was jarred out of a dream. "Hi, April. What's up?" He asked, but looked back at Leo, and then out the window, lost in his thoughts again.

April frowned, and Michaelangelo followed suit.

"Guys? Is something going on?" Mike asked, looking at his brothers.

"Absolutely nothing." Leo said.

"Are you sure…?" Mike began, but Leo cut him off.

"I said nothing, Michaelangelo. Why is everyone in such a nosy mood today?" Leo got up from his chair, then left the room.

Mike and April looked at each other.

"Don?" She began softly. "What happened?"

"Hmm…?" He said, distractedly. "Oh, nothing." He mumbled.

Mike sighed and April looked at him again.

"You'll never get anything out of him when he's like this." Mike said. "Watch." He turned to Don. "Hey, Don, we're gonna take Lindy with us, OK?"

"Mmm hmm." Came the answer.

"Maybe take her for a ride."

"That'll be nice."

"Take her skydiving. Is that OK?"

"Yeah, just have her back for her nap."

Mike looked at April, who was covering her mouth to keep from laughing.

"Mikey. You're bad." She whispered, partly laughing.

"I know." He beamed. "But I'm darn good at it." He grinned. "Years and years of practice."

"No kidding." April said, then laughed.

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Raphael sat on the couch, trying to watch TV. He uses the word 'trying' because all he can hear is the sounds of April and Mikey making lunch. Together. In the same room.

He sighed and looked at Donatello, who was sitting next to him on the couch. He hadn't said a word since he came in and sat down. Although Raph didn't much mind.

Leo had been upstairs since the morning, too. But he wasn't sleeping; not the few times Raph was upstairs.

Not that he could be, what with all the racket that's going on down here.

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Leo walked downstairs, feeling more awake now, but still tired. He walked into the living room, where it appeared that Raph and Don were watching TV.

"I'm going for a walk." He said, surprised at the sound of his own voice. He sounded tired. Weak.

Neither of them looked back at him.

"Have fun." Raphael said.

"Umm…" Leo began. "Hey, Don, you mind if I take Lindy with me, show her around?" He asked.

Don turned to him. "Sure. Go ahead." He turned back to the television. "Oh, we'll be eating soon." He said, then smiled. "Well, that is, if Mike and April ever get done making the food. I'm almost afraid of going in there to see what's going on…"

"Almost?" Raph turned to look at Donatello. "Why do you think we're both sitting here starving? I'm not goin' in there."

"Mike and April?" Leo smiled. "Well, no rush, then. We'll be back in a bit. In time for lunch, no doubt. Or dinner."

"Yeah." Don smiled. "See you in a bit."

"Yeah." Leo said. "See you."

********************************

The farm was always the prettiest in the fall. At least, that's what Leo thought. The fall and the spring, when everything was new and bright. But now, almost all the leaves were gone, and it was getting cold. Just added to his mood.

He sighed, looking away from the bare branches and dull sky and down at the tiny hand holding his.

"You're lucky, you know that?" He said, then looked back up at the trees in front of them. "All this space, all this freedom… All your innocence." She tugged on his hand, then broke free.

"Oh, no." He grabbed her hand again. "You're staying with me."

He picked her up and took her deeper into the woods, being careful not to stray too far to the right.

"I don't know about you, Lind, but I needed a walk. And you're the only one who won't question me about… things." He spoke as he walked, carrying her to a clearing where he set her down, grabbing her hand.

He sighed. "I do love it here, don't get me wrong. And you will too, but… There's just so much that's here. Beyond what you can see. What you can feel." He stared out at the clouds. "Your daddy knows something's wrong. And he won't give up until he finds out what that is. Your uncle Raph is mad because we won't tell him what's going on… And I know Mikey's seen something's wrong." He sighed. "And I hate being such a bother…." He laughed dryly. "And here I am, telling it all to you." He looked down to see her looking up at him. The only answer he got was her tugging on his hand, then slipping out of his grasp again. She ran from him, and went straight into a pile of leaves.

He ran over to her, and looked down at her. She grinned up at him, then threw her arms up, causing the leaves to fly all around her. One landed on her head.

He grinned, then picked it off of her head. He sat down in the leaves with her.

"You know, I just hate second-guessing myself. And I find myself doing it now, all the time. Not that I didn't before, but now it's for everything."

She responded by throwing her arms up again and made leaves fall onto him now. He laughed.

"Is that what you want me to do?" He asked her, then threw some leaves up. He smiled. "Shut up an toss some leaves in the air?"

She laughed as they fell around her like rain. He smiled back at her, then lay in the leaves beside her. "Thanks for the talk." He said softly, then tossed some more leaves into the air.

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Leo walked into the living room to see Raph and Don were still in the room, only now Don was in a chair and Raph was sprawled on the couch.

They both looked over as they walked into the room. Lindy reached her arms out for Don.

"Hey, guys." Leo said, handing Lindy over to Don. "What's going on? Are we late for lunch?"

"Late for lunch?" Raphael muttered, half laughing.

Leo looked to Don for an explanation.

"Raph and I called for a pizza half an hour ago." He said calmly, picking a stray leaf out of Lindy's hair.

Leo grinned. "That good, huh?"

"What, good?" Raph finally looked over at him. "We've never seen Mikey or April since they went in there." He turned back to the TV. "Maybe April cooked him." He muttered.

Don looked at Leo and grinned.

***********************************

When they finally sat down to eat, it was for supper, and the kitchen looked as if a struggle had taken place in it, and it was hurriedly cleaned up. Despite the pizza they'd had for lunch, they were still hungry, and soon it was silent around the table, as they all ate.

"Um, I was thinking…" Mike finally spoke up.

"There's a new one." Raph grumbled.

Mike shot him a look, but continued. "We've been here almost two weeks, and I think we should go and… and visit him."

Raph coughed suddenly, and Leo dropped his fork.

"What?" Leo spluttered.

"I think we should go and visit him." He said defensively. "I have already, but we should all go, together, and… and see him. It would be nice."

Leo looked to Don, who'd stayed quiet during Mikey's announcement.

"You knew about this?" Leo asked him.

"Well, I think it's a good idea." Don said carefully, not looking up from his plate.

Mike beamed.

Raph shrugged. "If you guys really wanna."

Don turned to Leo. "Leo, it would be a really good idea. We were his sons and all…"

"Are." Leo interrupted fiercely.

"What?" Don asked, confused.

"Are. We are his sons. And don't you use that against me." Leo growled. "You know what?" Leo stood up, throwing his napkin on the table. "Fine. You guys do what you want to do. Whatever." Leo strode from the room and up to his bed, which he flopped down on. He stared at the ceiling, feeling not the sadness he thought he would, well a little bit of that, but nervousness. He felt nervous and scared and… helpless. He hated feeling that way.

Three years. He thought to himself. It's been almost three years and I'm afraid to face it. I'm afraid to face him.

He sighed and put an arm over his eyes. Brave ninja. It's been three years, and I'm still afraid of a ghost.