I am. Because I think, I am. I am the one who can make rain go away and make the sun come out, because I think that I can. I can open my mind and shut my mouth, and be all powerful because I am God. He is nothing in my mind, and everybody looks up at me like they should.
Someday, everybody is going to look back in our yearbooks, with our grade ten innocent grins, the girls all made up and the guys with their hair "stylishly" messed up, and we are going to laugh. We will look at the all the blonde girls and think, wow, she is beautiful. We will look at all the freaks with pink hair and think, oh man, I bet she's nowhere. We will look at all the girls with dyed black hair and wonder if they've killed themselves yet.
And they will look and wonder what happened to Rick. He will be, someday, someone they will all look up to because I will be the Prime Minister. I will be God. I will be a movie star. I will be an icon.
Sometimes I look in the mirror and see somebody else. I am almost sure I am seeing things and having hallucinations, but probably I am seeing me, in the future.
I am going to have four kids, a dog, and a cat. We will live in a 2-story house with a white picket fence and pool in the backyard, and the kitchen will always smell like fresh baking. It will be so typical. My wife will be Terri, and we will always be in love forever.
There won't be a housekeeper, because I've had enough traumas with those to last me a lifetime.
She smiled at me today; Terri, not Lola. More of a half-smile, I said Hi to her. And Jimmy flipped the bird at me after I did, and I know he was off to tell her not to get to know me any more, but she is grown up, come on, Jimmy. She knows what she is doing.
After all, I was the one who is dating her, not Jimmy.
But on the other hand, I was the one who lost control. Here is my goal- to learn control, then go out with Terri. I will.
Or get her to forgive me. I've been avoiding them all lately except for Terri, not a difficult task seeing as I know them. I know her better than she thinks she does and I am going to get her back. I am.