Chapter 37 - Decisions

"Love that we can not have is the one that lasts the longest, hurts the deepest and feels the strongest"

"Oooooh…. The weather outside is frightful. But inside the fire's delightful…"

April laughed as Mike danced around the room, singing.

Raph grumbled, crossing his arms tighter.

"Oh, c'mon, Raph." April said. "It's not all that bad…"

Raph grunted. "Right. At least he's done with the '12 Days of Christmas'."

"Did I hear a request?" Mike peeked his head over the couch and looked at his rather surly looking brother.

"Let the song go, Mikey." Leo walked into the room, his arms full of mugs. He was grinning, He carefully set the mugs down on the table, and looked out at the room. A few boxes still littered the floor, leftover from Christmas morning. Other than that, they'd cleaned it up quite well.

Lindy still didn't quite 'get' what was going on… but Mike had been all too happy to help her tear into her gifts.

And… Leo mused. Most of the gifts were for Lindy. Which was the point, really. And she had enjoyed it immensely, as did they all.

It had been a nice little break, from the tension and sadness that lay behind it all.

"We're back." Don said as he came back into the room, holding a freshly changed Lindy.

"Just in time." Leo said, motioning to the hot chocolate he'd brought in.

A few minutes silence fell over the room as they began drinking the hot chocolate, and relaxing.

"So," April began, breaking the silence. "We're still all set for tonight, right?"

"It's so awesome that you could stay for New Years, April." Mike nodded.

April laughed. "Yeah, I'm kinda glad they decided to have a few internal computer problems. I so wanted to stay for the holidays." She glanced quickly over at Don, then looked back down.

"Well, problems or not, we're happy you could stay." Leo added, wanting to stay away from any more silent pauses.

"So am I." April said. "I'll be busy once I get back to city, and I'm not sure…" She cut off, biting her lip.

Leo reached over, and placed a hand on her own. "We understand." He said simply.

She nodded, but continued to stare into her mug.

"Hey." Mike broke in. "We're gonna make this such a party… Rule number one: no long faces." He winked at her.

She gave a small smile back.

Raph sighed then. "I'm going for a walk." He said, then got up and left the room.

"He's fine." Leo said, as Mike began getting up to go after him. "Just… let him go."

Mike nodded, not saying anything, much to his brother's surprise.

Leo sighed. If things were this awkward NOW, he dreaded to think how the next few days were gonna go…

April glanced at the clock, for what must have been the thousandth time. 10:55. No night had ever seemed so long, yet gone so fast. She dreaded the midnight hour, as it meant… She had to leave the next day to get her apartment ready.

Looking around the room, she had to smile. It wasn't a wild party, it was hardly a party at all. It was just them, sitting there, talking, playing games, watching TV… She wouldn't trade it for the world.

"I think I hear Lindy." Mike said suddenly, looking over from the couch.

Don and Leo both moved, but Don waved Leo back. "I'll go."

Leo nodded, and sat back. He stole a glance at Raphael. He sat on the couch with Mikey, but was silent, his arms crossed. He'd been in a funk since Christmas, and Leo could only attribute it to April's upcoming departure. It actually sort of surprised Leo, that his brother would be so upset this time around.

April stood then. "I'm gonna…" She began, then stopped. "I'll be right back." She said, then left the room.

"Okay." Mike nodded, then went back to his movie. Leo nodded also, but Raphael merely looked at her, then back to the TV.

April walked down the hallway, wringing her hands. She really didn't want to do this, but she had to. It was the thing she dreaded the most, above all else, about leaving.

She passed Lindy's room, and was surprised to find it empty. Her heart sank, and she turned to go back to the others, when suddenly, Don was behind her.

She gasped in surprise.

"Sorry." He said quietly. "Were you looking for… something?"

"Yes." She said, just as quiet. "You." She took his hands in hers, and led him to her room. She took him to the bed, and sat, motioning for him to do the same.

"I was really, not looking forward to this." She said quietly, looking over at him.

"Neither was I." Don admitted, glancing at her for a moment before looking down at the ground.

After a moment of quietness, she looked back at him. "Donnie…" She began, and he looked up at her. The look on his face broke her heart, and her face crumpled. "I'm gonna miss you, so much…"

"I know…" Don said. "Me too."

She sniffed, and looked down at the bedspread. "I was trying to think of a way, I could work from here. I COULD, you know. I could get an internet position or something…"

"No." Don's words, quiet, but forceful, made her stop, and look back up at him. He took her hand in his.

"April," He began, looking at her. He seemed to have so much to say, but then, deciding against it, looked down again. "We'd love for you to stay, you know that. Nothing would make me happier." She grinned slightly at that. "But," He continued. "We're… in like some kind of… warp out here. You could keep staying and staying, but… at the end of the day… you'd HAVE to go back, sooner or later, to a job. A life." His heart broke at the words he was saying, but he was convinced that he would NOT be the one to hold her back. No matter how much it hurt.

"I'll visit every chance I get." April said, tears streaming down her face. "I'll write, and call everyday…"

"No, you won't." Don interrupted softly. She looked at him. A sad grin covered his face. "And it's okay." He continued. "You'll be busy." He looked down for a minute.

April bit her lip, tears running down, falling to the bed.

"If I were a selfish person." Don said quietly. "I'd ask you to stay."

April started at the words. They'd been what she was waiting for, and dreading, since she knew she had to leave. Why did he have to wait until right then to say them??

"I have to go." She choked out, her own words surprising her, even as they left her mouth.

He looked at her, and nodded. He hadn't really been expecting her to change her mind and stay, but a piece of his heart still shattered at her words.

Another uncomfortable silence filled the room, until Don spoke, his voice barely a whisper. "April."

"Yes?" She looked at him. He was staring intently at her face, searching her eyes.

He opened his mouth to say something, then closed it again. Holding in a deep sigh, he looked back down. "You should get back to the others." He finished, closing his eyes slowly.

April drew in a sharp breath, her eyes filling with new tears. She nodded, knowing that if she opened her mouth, nothing but a sob would come out.

Covering her mouth with her hand, she left the room and went down the hall.

Don let out the breath he was holding, and opened his eyes, staring at his feet. He weakly punched his hand down on the bed as a shuddering breath left him, and his eyes filled with tears.

April rinsed a paper towel underneath the water in the sink. She used it to pat dry her face. She looked up at her reflection. Not too red… not too revealing of how upset she was. Her eyes filled anew at the thought. No. She would be strong. She would. She had to be. Straightening her shoulders, she walked back to the others.

She stopped in the doorway of the living room, watching them. Crossing her arms, she let a bit of a smile cross her face as she watched Mikey try and get Leo to play charades. Obviously his movie was over. She sighed, looking up. Suddenly she noticed the mistletoe that hung above her head. She shook her head, remembering how adamant Mikey had been about putting it there. God, how she'd miss them.

"April!" She heard Mike call suddenly. "Hey, girl, you're just in time, the ball's about to drop!"

She cleared her throat softly. Be strong. "Okay, Mikey." She stepped away from the doorway.

A moment later, Don appeared in the doorway. The countdown was just beginning. He sighed, dreading the festivities that everyone else was so looking forward to. Something caught his eye, and he looked up. He wrinkled his nose. Mistletoe.

Shaking his head, he watched as the crowd on TV became more excited as the count got down to the wire.

"4... 3... 2... 1." He whispered with the announcer.

Leo grinned as the ball dropped, and Mikey jumped up, yelling: "Happy New Year!!"

"Mikey, shh…" Leo admonished quietly. "Lindy…"

"Oops, sorry." Mike said sheepishly.

Even Raph had to smile when Mike grabbed April, kissing her on the cheek. She made a playful face, and then winked.

Don watched, almost transfixed as the people on the TV went wild. The celebration onscreen was an almost painful reminder that, despite the pain and tension in the house, life did, truly, go on.

Pushing away from the wall, Don made his way over to the others, and they celebrated the new year together, as a family.

"Are you sure you have everything?" Leo asked, following a pacing April around, Lindy on his hip.

"Yes, I think so." April fretted, glancing at her watch again. She was due to meet her new landlord, and she was already running late.

Checking over everything once again, she smiled, satisfied that she had everything. Taking a deep breath, she turned to the small group surrounding her.

"I'm gonna miss you guys so much!" She said, going to Mike and kissing him on the cheek. She made her way to each of them, kissing their cheeks and hugging them. She was pleasantly surprised when Raph grabbed her in a rough, but quick hug.

"I want emails and phone calls…" She continued, then reached Lindy and grabbed her, hugging her tightly. "And pictures! I want lots of pictures!"

Her smile faded, however, as she reached Don. He smiled sadly. She searched his eyes, and he opened his mouth as if to say something, but then shut it again.

"April…" He began, but cut off.

She nodded, in understanding. "I know." She whispered, then hugged him quickly, and began walking briskly to the car.

"Call us when you get there." Leo instructed, and she grinned through the tears now streaming down her face.

"I will." She promised. She started the car and looked back once more. Leo was holding Lindy, and waving, a small smile on his face. Mike was sniffling, but waved goodbye. Raph gave her the thumbs up, and winked. And Don… he stared at the ground, as if in deep concentration. She gave another grin to them, and then, with another wave, she started her car, and drove down the driveway.

They watched as her car drove out of sight, and, one by one, they began making their way back into the house.

Don waited, long after the others had gone inside. He mentally berated himself. I should've said something… anything… Suddenly, he felt a hand on his shoulder, and he looked back to see a very concerned Leo.

"C'mon." Leo said. "Let's go inside, huh? It's freezing."

Don nodded mutely, and followed his brother to the house. He'd thought… hoped maybe that she would come back. Back to him. But he couldn't take that away from her. She was better off this way, he told himself. She shouldn't be hidden away in this old house like they were. She deserved… everything and more.

Still… the thought of her returning made him look back outside once more.

Sighing, and taking one more glance at the road, Don walked into the house, and closed the door.

Author's Notes - One more to go, folks. I have to say, I actually cried writing April and Donnie's conversation.

One other thing, I was thinking of putting a sort of FAQ page on my site regarding my stories. If anyone has any questions they'd like to see answered, regarding my fics or writing please email me, and put the subject line as FicFaqs. Thank you.

Thanks -

Reinbeauchaser - Hehe, glad ya enjoyed it! And, yes, Don and April… "The course of true love never did run smooth", eh? ;) Not saying it'll get any smoother, mind you… But I always think of that quote. And, of course, you're one of my favorite people, also.

Vampy - I think Don DOES realize that it's not okay… but he so wants the best for her…

Kaliann - Thank you. And I sure will!

Buslady - Raph vs. the Tree was a last second idea, that I still laugh over! I can just picture it, hehe. And, I think we're gonna make Rene blush soon. ;)

Mickis - Hehe, thanks. And yep, it CAN be a pain, lol. Writer's Block is horrible. Ugh.

SaphireCat - Wow! Thank you so much! I'm glad you're enjoying it so much.

LenniluvsBrian - Hehe, glad ya liked that. And yep, I'm back! And so glad to be back, too. ;)

VestqueX - Hehe. watches the shaking fist warily Here's your update!!

Vegeta-Hiei Lover - Thanks!!

Gummadoon Fanatic - Thank you!!

Invader Sam - Wow, thanks! I'm so glad you're liking it. And, to answer your question, I really didn't have an idea of what universe it was in when I began it. But I seem to be leaning towards certain universes, regarding certain characters. I think I'm taking from a few of them… But I'm glad it gave you a bit more insight to them! Thanks again!

Heather - Hehe, here ya go!! Another update for ya!

Next chapter - The end? Or is it just the beginning?