Chapter 3: Unwanted Emotions
Hey I know I've been gone a while, lots of stuff going on. The list includes going 2 Europe, going 2 the beach and getting hugged by a jellyfish, geting kicked out of my house, and getting a new compy so i had 2 switch my files. hehe For those of u who have seen Utena & know where my nickname comes from (my friends actually call me "Wakaba" more than my real name), Wakaba's b-day is March 14th, 4 days b4 mine ! Kewlies ne? and get this, my friend (nicknamed Juri), her b-day is on the 10th, putting Wakaba's b-day exactly between ours! I just thought I'd share that random info w/ u all. CAUSE I"M 18 NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Note: I do not own Inu-Yasha, wish I did, but hey, "If only wishes were made to come true," ne? I do, however, own a very cute Kirara plushie that my friend Utena (once again, nickname) gave me as an early b-day gift! ARIGATO UTENA-SAN! I also own this song, it is mine! I myself wrote it so if ne 1 reading this wants 2 use it they better ask first and give me credit (grr). Ne way, please tell me what u think of the song!
/Dark loneliness so familiar A pain I want to endure I hate having you by my side And yet I need you even more/
She spotted him from her balcony, he was sitting in one of the garden trees. She noticed that he seemed to have a habit of that. She had begun to notice a lot of things about him of late. Like how he loved to train, how he disliked his brother and visa versa, how he often went off to be by himself, and how he was staring at her when he thought she didn't notice. She had even begun to be able to finish his sentences in her mind and predict how he'd react if she said or did something, and she'd only been here a week.
Often she found herelf gazing finly at him without knowing why. She never used to do theis sort of thing before due to the fact that she never really went outside her family shrine, what with Naraku after her and all. She touched the area on her side where the jewel lay just beneath her skin, and wondered if he even knew. Sure she'd let it slip more than once, but he hadn't even seemed to notice. Maybe he hadn't heard her, or maybe he actually didn't know what it was, which she found very doubtful. Whatever the case, it sure made it easier for him not to react.
/I'm not some damsel in distress I can do fine on my own Don't need Mr. Shining Armor Oh why I am I so undone?/
What infuriated her to no end was how he thought she needed protecting. If she couldn't protect herself, she had Sango to help her. They worked well together when it came to fighting. Of course lately Sango had been occupied with an odd monk named Miroku who had a thing for groping pretty women and asking them to bear his child. His main focus since they had arrived, had been Sango, having been put out by Inu-Yasha before he could even phrase the question. KAMI! Did he think she couldn't even take care of herself in such a simple situation as that? And yet, it was comforting to know that he cared about her. Unlike what she had previously thought, he actually wasn't doing it out of guilt, or else he would have sheilded Sango from the monk's request as well.
/Don't you know I feel us getting closer And yet there is nothing I can do It should be so much easier for me To just live life hating you This isn't what I wanted at all So where are all of my regrets?
I wish I didn't know What happens next/
Suddenly Inu-Yasha looked up, noticing her in an instant. She couldn't help but smile at how suspicious he looked. "Hey," Inu-Yasha called up to her, "How long have you been up there watching me?"
"Not long," she replied, "I just came ou here to do some thinking and I noticed you sitting there."
"You mind if I come up?" he inquired.
"Um..." she tried to conceal her crimson face, "It is YOUR home you know!"
"That's not what I asked."
"Er... Sure! Come on up!"
In a single leap he was perched on the railing, "Thank you for inviting me!" He grinned.
That did it. She began to laugh so hard she thought her sides would burst. He was thanking her, for inviting him up to a room in his own palace! It was as it she were part of the royal family herself!
/You're so unlike the others You let me be me So this is what it feels like To truly be free/
"What's so funny," Inu-Yasha's utter confusion only served to increase he laughter, "What damnit?!?!?"
"You," she finally managed to gasp out, "You, and the way you're treating me like I actually belong here, like I'm part of the royal family or something!"
"Feh, and what's wrong with that," she hadn't remembered him coming off the ledge, or being so close before, "What's wrong with you belonging here, like a part of the family?"
"Because," conflicting emotions and questions bounced back and forth inside her head, "I'm not. I'm only here because of your generous hospitality."
"Damnit! Quit throwing out that bull-shit!" he looked mad, "This isn't about hositality, or generosity, or me feeling guilty about what happened to your mom and gramps! And don't tell me you didn't say that cause I know you were thinking it! I'm not doing this to make myself look good or feel better! I'm doing this for you! Because I care about YOU!"
/Don't you know I feel us getting closer And yet there is nothing I can do It should be so much easier for me To just live life hating you This isn't what I wanted at all So where are all of my regrets?
I wish I didn't know what happens next/
"...Because I love you..."
It was so quiet she almost thought she had just imagined it, but one look into his eyes told her that she had heard correctly. He loved her. She had known this would happen, but now that it had what was she going to do about it? Did she love him back? She felt something for him, but she wasn't quite sure what those feelings were. It must be love she thought but why? I don't need this right now, this is the last thing I need
Inu-Yasha stood there, watching every emotion flicker across her beautiful face. Honestly, he had felt the the exact same way when he realized his emotions for her. Many other girls threw themselves at him, and yet he went for the girl who hadn't even known he was there as she swept. This girl didn't care if he was a prince or a pauper, so he knew her response would not be based on his status or wealth. Her answer would be her pure, honest feelings.
/Is this that silly emotion The one that they call love?
Don't feel like taking the dive yet Could you give me a little shove?/
"I can't love you... No...not can't, DON'T! I DON'T!! NO!" she collaped onto the balcony, shaking from held back sobs. She wasn't going to cry in front of him, not again, not EVER again.
"Why not," he knelt beside her and pulled her towrds him, "Why can't you?"
"Because I'm a miko," she would use that excuse, that one was undeniably true, "I have to remain pure... ((author note: this is true for all of you sceptics out there. Mikos are supposed to be virgins or else they loose their powers)) I have to keep my powers to protect the Jewel of Four Souls!"
She looked up at him in shock as she clamped her hands over her mouth, there was no way he hadn't heard her that time! DAMNIT KAGOME YOU ARE SUCH A BAKA! BAKA! BAKA! BAKA
"You have the Shikon no Tama?!?! But how... It doesn't matter. You," here it came, he'd demand the jewel like all other demons had done in the past... "Shouldn't base your feelings for me on that. I know you have to protect it, but there are other ways that don't require you giving up your happiness."
"You don't... want the jewel? You know what the jewel is right?"
"Feh, of course I know what it is! I'm a little peeved that ya' didn't let me in on this earlier, but I don't care about that right now I care about YOU!"
/Don't you know I feel us getting closer And yet there is nothing I can do It should be so much easier for me To just live life hating you This isn't what I wanted at all So where are all of my regrets?
I wish I didn't know What happens next/
Well at that precise moment there was someone burst througghtthe door... ((AN- isn't there always? -)) Kagome tried to regain her composure as Sango burst though though the door.
"I SWEAR IF THAT LECH GROPES ME ONE MORE TIME I'LL- OH! Good afternoon Inu-Yasha, perfect timing," there wasn't a doubt in Inu-Yasha or Kagome's minds as to who Sango was talking about. "Inu-Yasha could you please lock your friend in the dungeon or something?!?! For his own safety, before I KILL HIM!"
She whirled around to face the monk who had just entered the room. Raising up her bone boomerang as a warning for him not to take another step. Kirara bounded in, fully transformed, between the two.
Sango glared at Kirara, "Why the hell are you doing this Kirara!?!? Why are you protecting him?!?"
Kirara simply stood there between the two.
Kagome walked over to Sango to mollify her, "She probably just doesn't want you to do any permanent damage to the monk. He is a nice guy after all."
"Kagome I'm touched," Miroku came up behind her and.
SMACK SMACK BAM
Both girls slaped the monk right before Inu-Yasha came flying at him, knocking him senseless.
Inu-Yasha grabbed the unconcious monk by the robes and dragged him out the door, "If you didn't have to be at the festival tonight I WOULD be locking you in the dungeon. Kagom, please come tonight, I'll wait for you by the fountain out front."
/Don't you know I feel us getting closer And yet there is nothing I can do It should be so much easier for me To just live life hating you This isn't what I wanted at all So where are all of my regrets?
I wish I didn't know What happens next/
Sango looked over at Kagome, "No way in hell you're missing that festival. Come on we've got to get you ready..."
/Oh by God now I know What happens next/
Hey I know I've been gone a while, lots of stuff going on. The list includes going 2 Europe, going 2 the beach and getting hugged by a jellyfish, geting kicked out of my house, and getting a new compy so i had 2 switch my files. hehe For those of u who have seen Utena & know where my nickname comes from (my friends actually call me "Wakaba" more than my real name), Wakaba's b-day is March 14th, 4 days b4 mine ! Kewlies ne? and get this, my friend (nicknamed Juri), her b-day is on the 10th, putting Wakaba's b-day exactly between ours! I just thought I'd share that random info w/ u all. CAUSE I"M 18 NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Note: I do not own Inu-Yasha, wish I did, but hey, "If only wishes were made to come true," ne? I do, however, own a very cute Kirara plushie that my friend Utena (once again, nickname) gave me as an early b-day gift! ARIGATO UTENA-SAN! I also own this song, it is mine! I myself wrote it so if ne 1 reading this wants 2 use it they better ask first and give me credit (grr). Ne way, please tell me what u think of the song!
/Dark loneliness so familiar A pain I want to endure I hate having you by my side And yet I need you even more/
She spotted him from her balcony, he was sitting in one of the garden trees. She noticed that he seemed to have a habit of that. She had begun to notice a lot of things about him of late. Like how he loved to train, how he disliked his brother and visa versa, how he often went off to be by himself, and how he was staring at her when he thought she didn't notice. She had even begun to be able to finish his sentences in her mind and predict how he'd react if she said or did something, and she'd only been here a week.
Often she found herelf gazing finly at him without knowing why. She never used to do theis sort of thing before due to the fact that she never really went outside her family shrine, what with Naraku after her and all. She touched the area on her side where the jewel lay just beneath her skin, and wondered if he even knew. Sure she'd let it slip more than once, but he hadn't even seemed to notice. Maybe he hadn't heard her, or maybe he actually didn't know what it was, which she found very doubtful. Whatever the case, it sure made it easier for him not to react.
/I'm not some damsel in distress I can do fine on my own Don't need Mr. Shining Armor Oh why I am I so undone?/
What infuriated her to no end was how he thought she needed protecting. If she couldn't protect herself, she had Sango to help her. They worked well together when it came to fighting. Of course lately Sango had been occupied with an odd monk named Miroku who had a thing for groping pretty women and asking them to bear his child. His main focus since they had arrived, had been Sango, having been put out by Inu-Yasha before he could even phrase the question. KAMI! Did he think she couldn't even take care of herself in such a simple situation as that? And yet, it was comforting to know that he cared about her. Unlike what she had previously thought, he actually wasn't doing it out of guilt, or else he would have sheilded Sango from the monk's request as well.
/Don't you know I feel us getting closer And yet there is nothing I can do It should be so much easier for me To just live life hating you This isn't what I wanted at all So where are all of my regrets?
I wish I didn't know What happens next/
Suddenly Inu-Yasha looked up, noticing her in an instant. She couldn't help but smile at how suspicious he looked. "Hey," Inu-Yasha called up to her, "How long have you been up there watching me?"
"Not long," she replied, "I just came ou here to do some thinking and I noticed you sitting there."
"You mind if I come up?" he inquired.
"Um..." she tried to conceal her crimson face, "It is YOUR home you know!"
"That's not what I asked."
"Er... Sure! Come on up!"
In a single leap he was perched on the railing, "Thank you for inviting me!" He grinned.
That did it. She began to laugh so hard she thought her sides would burst. He was thanking her, for inviting him up to a room in his own palace! It was as it she were part of the royal family herself!
/You're so unlike the others You let me be me So this is what it feels like To truly be free/
"What's so funny," Inu-Yasha's utter confusion only served to increase he laughter, "What damnit?!?!?"
"You," she finally managed to gasp out, "You, and the way you're treating me like I actually belong here, like I'm part of the royal family or something!"
"Feh, and what's wrong with that," she hadn't remembered him coming off the ledge, or being so close before, "What's wrong with you belonging here, like a part of the family?"
"Because," conflicting emotions and questions bounced back and forth inside her head, "I'm not. I'm only here because of your generous hospitality."
"Damnit! Quit throwing out that bull-shit!" he looked mad, "This isn't about hositality, or generosity, or me feeling guilty about what happened to your mom and gramps! And don't tell me you didn't say that cause I know you were thinking it! I'm not doing this to make myself look good or feel better! I'm doing this for you! Because I care about YOU!"
/Don't you know I feel us getting closer And yet there is nothing I can do It should be so much easier for me To just live life hating you This isn't what I wanted at all So where are all of my regrets?
I wish I didn't know what happens next/
"...Because I love you..."
It was so quiet she almost thought she had just imagined it, but one look into his eyes told her that she had heard correctly. He loved her. She had known this would happen, but now that it had what was she going to do about it? Did she love him back? She felt something for him, but she wasn't quite sure what those feelings were. It must be love she thought but why? I don't need this right now, this is the last thing I need
Inu-Yasha stood there, watching every emotion flicker across her beautiful face. Honestly, he had felt the the exact same way when he realized his emotions for her. Many other girls threw themselves at him, and yet he went for the girl who hadn't even known he was there as she swept. This girl didn't care if he was a prince or a pauper, so he knew her response would not be based on his status or wealth. Her answer would be her pure, honest feelings.
/Is this that silly emotion The one that they call love?
Don't feel like taking the dive yet Could you give me a little shove?/
"I can't love you... No...not can't, DON'T! I DON'T!! NO!" she collaped onto the balcony, shaking from held back sobs. She wasn't going to cry in front of him, not again, not EVER again.
"Why not," he knelt beside her and pulled her towrds him, "Why can't you?"
"Because I'm a miko," she would use that excuse, that one was undeniably true, "I have to remain pure... ((author note: this is true for all of you sceptics out there. Mikos are supposed to be virgins or else they loose their powers)) I have to keep my powers to protect the Jewel of Four Souls!"
She looked up at him in shock as she clamped her hands over her mouth, there was no way he hadn't heard her that time! DAMNIT KAGOME YOU ARE SUCH A BAKA! BAKA! BAKA! BAKA
"You have the Shikon no Tama?!?! But how... It doesn't matter. You," here it came, he'd demand the jewel like all other demons had done in the past... "Shouldn't base your feelings for me on that. I know you have to protect it, but there are other ways that don't require you giving up your happiness."
"You don't... want the jewel? You know what the jewel is right?"
"Feh, of course I know what it is! I'm a little peeved that ya' didn't let me in on this earlier, but I don't care about that right now I care about YOU!"
/Don't you know I feel us getting closer And yet there is nothing I can do It should be so much easier for me To just live life hating you This isn't what I wanted at all So where are all of my regrets?
I wish I didn't know What happens next/
Well at that precise moment there was someone burst througghtthe door... ((AN- isn't there always? -)) Kagome tried to regain her composure as Sango burst though though the door.
"I SWEAR IF THAT LECH GROPES ME ONE MORE TIME I'LL- OH! Good afternoon Inu-Yasha, perfect timing," there wasn't a doubt in Inu-Yasha or Kagome's minds as to who Sango was talking about. "Inu-Yasha could you please lock your friend in the dungeon or something?!?! For his own safety, before I KILL HIM!"
She whirled around to face the monk who had just entered the room. Raising up her bone boomerang as a warning for him not to take another step. Kirara bounded in, fully transformed, between the two.
Sango glared at Kirara, "Why the hell are you doing this Kirara!?!? Why are you protecting him?!?"
Kirara simply stood there between the two.
Kagome walked over to Sango to mollify her, "She probably just doesn't want you to do any permanent damage to the monk. He is a nice guy after all."
"Kagome I'm touched," Miroku came up behind her and.
SMACK SMACK BAM
Both girls slaped the monk right before Inu-Yasha came flying at him, knocking him senseless.
Inu-Yasha grabbed the unconcious monk by the robes and dragged him out the door, "If you didn't have to be at the festival tonight I WOULD be locking you in the dungeon. Kagom, please come tonight, I'll wait for you by the fountain out front."
/Don't you know I feel us getting closer And yet there is nothing I can do It should be so much easier for me To just live life hating you This isn't what I wanted at all So where are all of my regrets?
I wish I didn't know What happens next/
Sango looked over at Kagome, "No way in hell you're missing that festival. Come on we've got to get you ready..."
/Oh by God now I know What happens next/