A/N: Emily: Hey! No more stinky exams! Oh yeah! I'm leaving school tomorrow! No more stupid maroon uniform! Woo Hoo! I just cut it up and made a nice costume for our dog, Roxy, but she didn't seem that impressed.

George: This chapter is slightly short but it is just getting going, to where, we still don't know but we hope you shall join us on our quest for…well…um…

Disclaimer: We own Kai! It's the first time we have owned something! We don't have to give him back! Yay! Feel free to use him we won't mind as long as we can read it too!

Chapter One – Kai.

"I really do not think you will need that many dresses." Pointed out Legolas as he watched Emily try and shut her bag with a great deal of difficulty.

"Has it escaped your attention that I may need your help over here?!"

"We will not be in Lothlorien for long, you have brought enough dresses to last for twice the stay!"

"Exactly!"

"I do not see how that answers my point and I also do not see why you insist on leaving for Lothlorien now. The wedding is not for another three weeks."

"You shall see." Grinned Emily as she dragged her bag to the stables.

….

Gathered at the stables were a large group of elves ready to see their prince and princess off. There usually would be a congregation of giggling elf-maidens surrounding Legolas wherever it went, but they had been scared off by a threat of water bombs that would not necessarily be filled with water by the ever original princess.

"Your father has asked I join you." Began Kai.

Emily was sure his name was a shortened version of something a lot more elven but had never bothered to find out. Kai was Thranduil's best guard and also Legolas' best friend.

"Any particular reason why?" Asked Legolas.

"He still worries about the high number of Orcs in Arda. I told him you could take care of yourself to which he answered, 'and while he is doing that who will be making sure Emily is not destroying something.'"

"He does have a point." Smirked Legolas. Mirkwood had been significantly livelier since Emily's arrival. Who could forget the speech she had insisted making at their wedding?!

"Can we go now?!" Asked an impatient Emily who was doing her best impressions of an over excited two year old.

"Kai will be joining us."

"Does he have an invitation?"

Kai shook his head in amusement, "I do not think Haldir and Boromir will mind one more."

"If you say so." Emily jumped up onto her horse Tiny. "Hi Ho Tiny Away!"

With that Emily sped off leaving Legolas and Kai to mount their Stallions and follow.

….

"My Lord, do you not think we should ready your things for your journey to Lothlorien?" Asked George's personal assistant. When George became King of Gondor he refused to call anyone his servant so now he has a great deal of P.A's. 

"I am awaiting the arrival of someone. When they are spotted I shall pack my things." Answered George wondering on the whereabouts of his sister.

….

"I think we should play a game." Suggested Emily as the three riders made their way through Mirkwood forest.

"What kind of game?" Asked Kai.

"I suppose 'Name that tune' would be lost on you guys. We could always play George's favorite, 'Guess that smell.'"

"Would you be deeply offended if I declined?"

"I think I'll survived." Sighed Emily. "Although Legolas knows all about the repercussions of my boredom."

Images flashed of pink and zombies in Legolas' mind, "So this tune game how do you play it?"

"Nice try! How about eye spy? Even you could play that."

"Are you saying I'm thick?" Gasped Legolas using one of Emily's preferred phrases.

Kai laughed at the exchange, "Prince Legolas ever the demure and well spoken aristocrat."

"Did you ever have to take prince lessons?" Inquired Emily following the line of conversation.

"No." Replied Legolas.

"So you're naturally stuck up?"

Legolas raised and eyebrow.

"Joke! I could never marry someone stuck up. I mean to kiss them you would have to stick your head up…"

"Look a bird!" Cried Legolas stopping the obvious direction Emily's thought process was going in.

"That's just a leaf dear." Said Emily skeptically.

"Oh so it is." Mumbled Legolas.

Kai's confusion was ever present on his face as Legolas and Emily continued to bicker on about Legolas' need for glasses.

After five minutes of arguing and the ten minutes of silence that ensued Emily finally said something.

"I went to finishing school."

"There was a definite need for conversation there. However, there was no need for a downright lie!" Laughed Kai.

"What?! It's true!" Defended Emily.

"What happened?" Smirked Legolas.

"Well remember the time when Aragorn tried to give George and I lessons in manners, it kinda ended like that except with a glue gun and some staples."

"What are staples?" Asked Kai.

Emily was lost in memory so Legolas answered for her, "Ask Gandalf at the wedding."

"So he hasn't been banned then?"

"Boromir took pity on him."

….

The three set up camp on the outskirts of southern Mirkwood.

'Where's my eye candy gone?" Thought Emily to herself.

Legolas had gone scouting the area so Emily rested her eyes on Kai who was unloading the horses.

'No your married! You can't ogle other elves!' Yelled Emily's brain.

'I was not ogling I was admiring! Legolas is the only one for me! Though Kai is quite cute in a darker kind of way.' Noted Emily.

'Stop it! However, you do have a valid point, Oh! He just bent over!'

"What are you looking at?" Asked Legolas from behind her.

"Ka…" Emily quickly stopped herself.

"What?"

"Urm…Kangaroos."

"Maybe you should get some sleep hunny."

"Yep and I can think of no better person than you to assist me in that task!" Smiled Emily.

….

A/N: George; Weird place to end it but I promised Emily that I would let her help right the next bit. Right now she is tanking up on Rum in celebration of no more exams. I tried to warn her that all the photos of her on leavers day will be of her with a hangover but did she listen?!

Thank yous:

Snow Crystals – I reckon Em knows how you feel. She was uber peeved when that bed got in the way of Oiled up Orli, as she is now referring to him, nudeness. I myself was quite glad; you try dragging an unconscious Emily from the cinema!

Lil' Smartass – I think Emily has taped the comma button down!

Limpet666 – Nooooooooooo! Emily keeps singing that flipping advert! What's so special about it!

Shadowz – Huzzah! Don't you just love POTC. You need to watch Spaced we are starting a cult following. Don't tell anyone but Emily has developed a crush on Simon Pegg!