An Infinite Improbability
"Righty-ho, then!" Sirius thrust up his arm, finger pointing toward the Three Broomsticks. "To Rosie's we go!"
James shook his head and turned to look at me. "He's not normally this obnoxious. Or bouncy. Usually a bit easier to cope with."
I turned to stare up at him. "And I suppose you're lying?"
He looked back at the path we were trudging through and smiled, nodding. "I suppose I am."
………
That morning, I woke up and wondered for a moment why it was so calm before remembering that I was the only person in the dormitory. I got up miserably, took a nice hot shower to freshen up, and ate a ham sandwich—actually, that's two ham sandwiches. The rest of the day, as I had previously decided during the late hours I spent awake the night before, was to be spent curled up in front of the fire accompanied by a good book I have yet to read. It was also dedicated to several bouts of shame and sulking every time I remember what I had done the night before. It wasn't exactly a huge ghastly misdemeanor. It was only playing chess with James, who I had consequently decided was a person I should avoid playing chess with.
It had been going quiet well actually. I even thought we were actually having a good time. But I suppose things were just getting too friendly that it just had to be ruined by something. Like, say, me crying. Yes, I believe that would ruin a wonderful moment quite adequately. And, needless to say, ruin it did.
I keep telling myself that it was just one tear that I had quickly brushed away. But what if I hadn't? What if I just bawled right there in front of him about how I was avoiding my sister, who quite evidently detests me with all the heart she has? What would have happened then? Would he have comforted me? Or would he have thought that I was a freakish crybaby?
But anyway, the point here really is that I had not planned on going to Hogsmeade on such a cold weather. I rarely did that. But the fact that I was out strolling down the road to Hogsmeade on a frozen day was nothing compared to the absurdity of the fact that I was out strolling down the road to Hogsmeade on a frozen day with the Marauders.
Of course, to have James Potter walk beside me and pretend that nothing had happened the previous night after the chess game was even more bizarre. Unnerving, really.
………
Sirius, Remus, and Peter walked a few yards ahead of us, consciously aware of the fact that they were leaving behind them an empty, silent, and awkward procession.
I struggled to think of a question. No, not the weather. That would be pathetic. Not Quidditch; I barely know my teams, nor do I know a lot about broomsticks. So I just went with a question that Lily Evans—that is to say myself—would be typically heard asking. "So…" I started. Lamely. "Um. Are we even allowed to be out here? I mean, you did ask for permission from McGonagall, right? Or even declare to one of the staff that you're going whether they like it or not, and there's nothing they can do to stop you…?"
Slowly, he turned his head to glance briefly at me. His mouth was opened slightly, puffs of breath visibly coming out from between his two recently moistened parted lips.
"From that face, I'm deducing you didn't. I think you should've."
"I think I really don't care much," he said, running a hand through his snow-sprinkled hair.
"When did you ever, really?"
"As a matter of fact, there is a part of me that cares, y'know. There is a very kind, wonderful, and pleasant part of me who I think you would be infinitely proud of. He does his work, turns in his essays on time, he's big on responsibilities, and he is also a perfect gentleman." He smiled lightheartedly. "I call him Jack. And—I'm guessing you've already figured this one out—I don't listen to Jack. Most of the time, at least. I personally think that he's a desperate idiot."
"Right." I said, not able to think of anything to say. "Well I suppose you and Jack have absolutely nothing in common?"
"Actually, now that you asked, we do. We're both very good looking. Yep. Absolutely, strikingly handsome. Breathtakingly spectacular."
It's weird that only yesterday James came to the Head Room and acted absolutely strange, almost shy. But now, he was comfortably nestled back onto his old cocky self, talking to me about how attractive he was. Of course this wasn't entirely untrue but he could at least be modest about it.
"And…" he continued, "We also have this other similarity over which we argue all the time. You see…" He ran a hand through his hair. "We're both very, very fond of the exact same person—a very lovely young lady who drives us both mad. Off our rockers. Terribly nutty." I twisted uncomfortable underneath my heavy cloak. "We squabble over her a lot. Which isn't entirely unreasonable once you've seen the girl. She is, in a word, amazing." My knees wobbled.
"And I know her, don't I?" Perhaps I shouldn't have said that…
He smiled, eyes gleaming. "Evans, I'll be surprised if you don't."
I nodded. "I thought so."
Why doesn't he just tell me? Get to the point and tell me that you—and Jack—fancy me!
Then again, maybe he doesn't. Maybe he's not talking about me at all. He could have easily been talking about one of the girls in my dormitory; a close friend of mine.
But then he has been asking me out for the past few years. But then he did stop. Not a word about a date from him since September. Probably thought I was a waste of time. A futile attempt. There were, after all, a lot more fish in the sea. Especially for someone like him—Head Boy, Quidditch captain, and an incredibly appealing and intelligent young man who carries himself exceptionally well.
Now that I do think about it, James finally losing interest in me is incredibly probable. Not to mention incredibly upsetting. On my part, at least.
………
The pub was thankfully as nice, as cozy, and as warm as always. It was empty except for a few local villagers (who were discussing the Ministry's defense schemes against the Dark Lord), the five of us, and Madam Rosmerta, who jumped up and beamed the moment we got through the door.
She paused right in front of our table, took out a chair, and made herself comfortable. She grinned a lovely grin and looked us over. Her eyes bulged enthusiastically when she saw me.
"Rosie, lookin' good."
"Why thank you Sirius. I suppose you could introduce me to our guest? I've seen her around I'm sure. Such a charming young lady doesn't go unnoticed. Unfortunately, no proper introductions have been made."
Remus smiled. "Lily Evans, Rosie. Lily, I'm sure you know Madam Rosmerta."
I smiled. She smiled back, her eyes shimmering more vividly. She gave a small chuckle. "A pleasure to finally meet you Miss Evans." In a loud whisper, she added, "I have heard great things about you."
"Is that so? I should be thanking the person from whom you heard then."
"Oh, believe me, you should. The young man deserves it. All the times he's been here moping about—"
James plunked down a couple of galleons on the table. "Right. That's nice. Five butterbeers then, Rosie."
Madam Rosmerta gave another giggle and took the galleons before leaving.
Remus looked at James, grinning. "James, why end a pleasant conversation so rudely?"
James ran a hand through his hair. "I was thirsty."
At this Sirius laughed out loud. Peter followed. Remus sniggered quietly. I, on the other hand, watched as James turned to me and felt shamed (yet again) by his friends.
"They're not normally this obnoxious," he said. "Not Remus, at least."
"Do you think I know what they're so happy about?" I asked.
He stared at me and smiled. "Yes. You know exactly what they're so happy about."
At that point in time, upon seeing the look of utter aggravation on his face, I laughed. Which seemed to have cheered him up a great deal. He smiled at me. It was that normal, human smile I had been hoping for.
I smiled back.
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/sniffle/ the reviews were absolutely wonderful…it's people like you who make me feel terribly good that it's not even humanly possible…
stasiamez – writing about love in a normal way is one of my goals and I love you for telling me that…
aurora-borealis – I'm hoping on keeping it up…I'll have my fingers crossed.
LogicalRaven – hehe…there is a Maraudering rule (that I made up just now) stating that a Marauder should try to be inconspicuous only if his life is depending on it…I guess they're just going by the rules…
duva – ack, thank you!
MC – damn, have I ever told you that I love you? :o)
Emily-Hardbottle – exactly…it shouldn't be allowed…
Kait – it's good that you like that cause I don't think they'll be hitting it off anytime too soon… or maybe they will… or not… And getting addicted to reviews is completely reasonable.
spunkygabi – hope I updated soon enough for you to keep reading.
iriscristata - /blush/ thank you… and don't worry, they'll get together… I just can't assure you that it's gonna be soon…
Diana – I completely agree with school being appalling… it's horrible. Anyway, thank you. And easy on the Hard Lemonades.
IeatGlue17 – whoo! I did an excellent job! Thank you!
***The other half of the Hogsmeade visit—or invasion—will be narrated by James, who is currently very, very flustered.