[AN: IF you have not red my first story, 'Tell me a story' , you won't understand this.]
"Well, it was back in the past, a few years after Wanda's story. We had split up; Wanda was with Wandisimo and I was on my own. I was going to school one day when I saw Jorgen von Strangle, and he called me over. The thing was, he didn't sound that pleased. In fact he was in a huge, screaming rage..."
BEGIN FLASHBCK
"COSMO!!!" roared Jorgen von Strangle, "COSMO!!! You blithering idiot!!!" ("That's him" giggled Wanda.) "You imbecile!!! You are not worthy of me or my muscles!!!" [AN: Jorgen always uses three exclamation marks after speaking.]
"What- what did I do?" shivered Cosmo in terror.
Jorgen considered for a second, then spoke in a very calm voice. "Er- nothing. I just felt like shouting at someone. But do not disturb me or my muscles again!!!" He poofed off. Cosmo floated exactly where he was, as if Jorgen was still there.
"Ooooh! Like, what a loser!!!" said a voice which was very high-pitched, but also managing to sound like it's owner was pretty high in the school's popularity ranks. "Like, that moron Cosmo totally was like sooo scared of Jorgen, like what a sap! Not only is he a, like, total dweeb, he is a wuss too! Like, oooh my gosh! Wuss! Totally cool new insult word! Check that down, Beth! Put it under, like, dweeb words."
[AN: In my other story, in the beginning, Wanda was not identified as soon as Cosmo. This is similar, but I'm not telling ya who Wanda is yet!]
"Totally! W-U-S-S. Got it. Anyway, today is speak to the losers day... The girls walked off.
"Oooh like what a loser" said Cosmo to his mates, prancing about like the girl who'd insulted him. "I wasn't scared of Jorgen, well I was, but she'd probably wet her pants!!! Just because she's pretty, and popular, and rich, and has loads of people crowding round her, and several boyfriends, and..." Cosmo stopped. "Wait! What's my point?"
"The thing is, Cosmo," stated Daniel, his best pal, "Wanda is pretty and popular and that lot. And she's not a good enemy to choose, even though you are the leader of our club. It's just not worth it. Lets face it, we're losers and she's all-powerful. There's just nothing we can do! Forget it. It won't get us anywhere!"
"I suppose" said Cosmo dully.
---
"Soooo Wanda, today is talk to the losers day, like totally gross, and you've been paired with Cosmo." Wanda's best friend/secretary stated.
"What? That wuss? (Hey, I like that word.) Like, don't I get to choose? I am the most popular fairy in at least, like, a four-and-a-half mile radius of here. No, five, if you don't count my brother's house. He, like, suffers from memory loss."
"No, this isn't up to us popular people. It's social studies, in class. An hour a day with your partner-"
"What?" yelled Wanda, "An hour a day with that loser? I mean that's- that's- that's so, like, cruel! And I can't, like, object? That is sooooo not cool!"
"Cool or not, we have to do it," sighed Beth.
"Like, I'll get my gas mask."
END FLASHBACK
---
"Wow!" yelled Timmy. "Wanda, you were cool! You were like, um, Trixie Tang!" His eyes went into little hearts when he mentioned her name.
"And I was you!" Cosmo cried. "Apart from that, er, you fancy Trixie-" Cosmo blushed deep rose red.
Wanda smiled all-knowingly. She smiled michcheviously at Timmy.
"Ooooh," said Timmy, smiling just the way Wanda had done. "I see. Well, I want to see how Cosmo won you, maybe it will work on Trixie!"
"Your wish is my command, sir!" announced Cosmo stupidly. Timmy stared at him blankly.
Wanda gave a very convincing 'bored' look and magicked up another flashback.
BEGIN FLASHBACK
It was social studies class. Wanda and Cosmo had to sit at a desk together, of course. Wanda was sitting at the very far end, and whenever she had to touch something of Cosmo's, she held the very edge, as if it was all dirty and germy. Beth and the others giggled appreciatively.
"Hey! Don't do that!" Cosmo said crossly, "My stuff is just as clean as yours..."
"...apart from the two inches of muck! Oh, just get on with it!" Wanda said, (receiving a clap from someone called Miranda).
It certainly was an interesting scene – The leader of all the people who were popular and cool, and the leader of the nerds, come face to face. Wanda was making jokes about Cosmo's general untidiness and making her mates laugh, Cosmo was holding his nose at her and making his mates laugh. But no-one was doing their social studies, and the teacher, Miss Sky, was not pleased.
"Class, come on. I know you will be working with someone who you don't usually spend a lot of time with, but-"
Beth giggled at this. She nudged a blonde girl sitting next to her and whispered something. They burst into peals of laugher.
"Yes, Bethany and Samantha, I am glad you find this so entertaining. Bethany, please move to the back of the room. Sam, you please sit on the table next to Wanda and Cosmo. I know you are a sensible girl really, so I would like you to calm them down. They are the noisiest pair of them all!" commanded the teacher.
"Yeah, Sammy, I need you here, to keep that awful Cosmo in line," giggled Wanda, not believing her luck. Cosmo, on the other hand, moved even further round the table, held his nose, and made a crude joke about teachers pets. Sam, like Wanda, was also lucky, but in the respect that she now had a first hand view at the Big Scene.
---
"Like, that was sooooo not cool," whined Wanda. "I mean, having to spend a whole hour with Cosmo! He is, like, the most major rated dork dweeb there is! He's a moron!"
"You can say that again!" laughed Beth. "But Miss Sky was totally out of order! I mean, did you see the way she looked at Cosmo! Like she was his, like, mom! I mean, like, no wonder she's a Miss!"
"Oooh gross! She doesn't look anything like Cosmo." said Sam, "But she's an old loser, just like him."
"Like soooo totally! I mean, what was she thinking, moving me away? She has no popularity sense at all," moaned Beth
"She doesn't understand," agreed Sam.
"Or maybe she understands all too well. She doesn't like us, does she?" suggested Wanda sleepily.
There was a silence. Partly because what no one could think of anything to say, and partly because what Wanda had just said was rather clever. Beth sighed. Sam stuck her tongue out at Daniel. Wanda looked like she might drop off to sleep.
"Wanda, are you okay?" asked Sam. "You look pretty tired."
"I... don't know... I feel... sleepy."
"Wanda! Are you okay? Shall I get a teacher?" asked Beth worriedly.
"Fat lot she'll do," argued Sam.
"Oh I'm so sorry for caring about my best friend!" yelled Beth sacrasticly.
"Don't talk to me like that! I'm just stating the truth!" yelled Sam.
"Pessimist."
"Dork"
"Loser"
"Wimp"
"Oh you're calling me a wimp!" screamed Beth. "You're a blooming wuss!"
"As if, you stupid loser! Right! You are officially UNPOPULAR!!!!!"
"You can't to that!" yelled Beth. "I'm much more popular than you! Wanda likes me best!"
"No, me!"
"No, me!"
"Me!"
"Me!"
"Me!"
"Me!"
"Me!"
"Me!"
"Me! Me! Me!" yapped Sam.
"Me! Me! Me!" yapped Beth.
"Me! Me! Me!" yapped Sam.
"Shut up!" yelled Insomnicac II
---
Normally in class, Beth and Sam sat at one desk while Wanda one to herself in front, but today when they got back to class, Wanda was gone! Normally Beth would have called the police, but today she rudely shoved Sam and flopped down in Wanda's desk. Normally Sam would have hijacked the school loudspeaker and alerted the entire school, but today she just grabbed Wanda's stuff protectively and plopped it down on her desk. When the teacher's back was turned, Sam kicked Beth. If Miss Sky had to go out for some reason, Beth hurled pieces of rubber at Sam.
The rest of the class had noticed that Wanda was missing, and some presumed Sam had kicked Beth of the desk and Beth had to sit on Wanda's desk, and Wanda had been upset and gone away. Some decided that Beth had hurt Wanda and moved onto her desk because she was jealous. So at the end of the day, people were cross with both Beth and Sam, but it didn't bring Wanda back.
[AN: Yes I know that was about the shortest chapter in the history of all short chapters, I'm sorry; I had about five minutes to write it. The next one will be better, I promise!]
---
"Mmmmph mmmmph mmmmph MMMMPH"
"Hey, easy on the load! He's waking up!"
"O shut up, it's not my fault! You're the one who's jogging him!"
"No I'm not! It's difficult walking backwards, you know!"
"Well, I don't know, you're the one walking backwards!"
"O shut up and stop being a smart aleck! Its not funny."
"Yes it is!!!"
"NO ITS NOT!"
"Mmmmph!! MMM noise"
"That's your fault!"
"Shut up!"
Cosmo gulped. He did not know where he was, and he did not have any idea what was happening to him. All he knew was that he could not speak, his wings were tied, and his wand was gone. All he could say was 'mmmmph'. Cosmo was usually a loud fairy, so he did not like this at all. He also felt cramped, and it was dark. No, it was that he had his eyes closed. When he tried to open them, he felt he could not. He tried to speak but he could not do that either. He was scared.
Suddenly Cosmo was pulled out of his cage, what he discovered later to be a cardboard box. Strong hands hurled him into a real cage, complete with metal bars. His wand was gone. That meant he could not poof anywhere. He was really scared now. He realised there were other fairies there. There were both fairies and Anti-Fairies. The only one he recognised was Anti Wanda. She was part of his nerds gang, and she beamed when she saw him.
"Cothmo, the big thtrong guy ith puthing fairieth in thith cage. He got Danieel now. They are taking our wandth and outing them in a bockth. Mine got thaken away. You gotto thtop them."
"Me? Why me?"
"Coth you thtill got your crown. You will haff a lithle bit oth mathic left."
"What do I have to do?"
"Lithten. That ith Mr Sir..."
---
"Right," said Cosmo. "I recon we wait until-" Cosmo was interrupted by a loud, high-piched scream of 'Hey, watch the hair!' Seconds later a large crane tipped Wanda headfirst into the cage on fairies. "Great. Just what I needed." said Cosmo sarcastically, but under his breath.
"Ooooh, like what are you freaks doing here? I mean, is this the nerd enclosure or something?? Sure smells like it!" said Wanda dismissively. "What are we doing here anyway. Before letting anyone answer, she dipped into her handbag and pulled out a very flashy mobile, and began talking rapidly in girl-speak.
"Roit!" yelled a man, making all of the fairies except Anti Jorgen and Wanda (who was still chatting to Beth and Sam in turn, each snatching the phone from the other and talking rapidly for about five seconds until the phone was snatched back again) jump back in startled confusion and fear.
"Thath the head big thtrong guy" whispered Anti Wanda to Cosmo. "Make thure he duthent pick oo up. Ith he duth it will be tha end for you!"
"Is that what happened to Anti Cosmo," he whispered back.
"Yeth."
"Really?" said Wanda, who had been listening. "What happens?"
"I don't want tho tork abowt it." said Anti Wanda, and a tear rolled down her cheek.
"Sorry." whispered Wanda. As soon as he's gone, I'll get us out of here. I promise."
"AS if! We're nerds. Why are you helping us? This is a trap, isn't it." said Cosmo suspiciously.
"No, I promise." said Wanda. "I've been so horrible. I owe it to you. Remember when we were little..." Cosmo went into a daydream.
"What do we haf to do?" asked Anti Wanda.
"Nothing except... when I ask you to climb into a scary looking jeep, you have to believe me that its safe. And promise me one thing. You can't ever tell anyone I did this. I'd get kicked out of my gang at school!"
"I promith." said Anti Wanda.
---
As soon as the lead bad guy was gone, Wanda opened up her cell phone. She dialled quickly. "Hello? Beth! Thank goodness. Yes I'm fine, send jeep 0154 to- buzz Sam? Its you! I need you to send the jeep 0154 over to co-ordinates (2;7), (7;1). Got it? buzz Beth again? Okay, I told you the jeep number, send it to (2;7), (7;1). With Sam. I don't care if you had a fight. I need you to- AAAAGGGGHHH send... it quickl-" Wanda's phone was torn from her hands and dropped into a vat of bubbling liquid.
Beth looked at Sam. Sam looked at Beth.
"Best friends again?" offered Sam.
"Best friends again!" agreed Beth.
By the time Jeep 0154 was ready and on its way to co-ordinates (2;7), (7;1), Anti Wanda had been picked up by the scary-looking man and was about to be drained of her magic. Wanda just had to hope her friends would make up and send the jeep in time to save Anti Wanda.
---
"Yee Ha!" yelled Beth. "Help has arrived!" The machine suspending a terrified Anti Wanda dropped her and Cosmo just managed to grab his wand in time to magic up a pillow underneath so she wouldn't be hurt.
"Get into the jeep!" yelled Sam, who was holding on to it and leaning out of the door. "Get in if you wanna live!" Fairies began piling in as Sam, Wanda and Cosmo shot with their wands at the big guy and his cronies. But one of them shot back, and Cosmo fell on his leg, which twisted sideways. He yelled in pain. Sam protected them from the baddies while Wanda and Miranda (remember her?) helped Cosmo into the vehicle. Beth stayed at the jeep's wheel, ready to drive away as soon as Wanda called her. Which she did, and everyone got clean away. Well they weren't clean, most were splashed in oil, but you know what I mean!!!!!
END FLASHBACK
"And that's what happened!" yelled Cosmo in a frenzy.
"Jeeze, calm down a bit!" giggled Timmy. "That was a cool story. So... all I have to do to win Trixie is have her abducted then save her from complete and utter annihilation. Sounds hard."
"It was." said Wanda.
"To put it plain, no chance!" laughed Cosmo.
"You do another story now, Wanda," said Timmy.
"Oooooh! Do the one about our wedding! And the Anti Fairies! Pleeeeeese!" yelled Cosmo.
"Alright. But Timmy, you have to promise not to tell Jorgen or anyone." giggled Wanda. "Now, at the beginning of one's wedding day, in fairyland, Da Rules say that brothers and sisters get married on the same day. So normally you might get two sisters, and they each marry one of two brothers, say. But we had a problem. Cosmo was an only child, and my only siblings, my two older sisters were both already married. And the rules say that either the bride or the groom has to have one of his/her brothers/sisters married on the same day. Which we couldn't do! So we went to Jorgen..."