ATTENTION
This chapter of "Where I'll Always Be" contains diolouge containing, violence, drug abuse, mild language, and slight graphic diolouge of rape. The nature of this chapter has been kept as clean as possible. Rated PG-13.
THANK YOU AND ENJOY.
Where I'll Always Be
Chapter 31:Confessions of the Heart
Nikkie was in the back of the car unconcious. When he had thrown her in the car she had banged her head on the window on the other side. The guy was driving like crazy. He was heading far from town. Suddenly Nikkie began to squirm. She had woken up. She looked around and didn't notice where she was. She saw that the window was fogged up and water droplets covered it too. She saw a man in the front passenger seat smoking drugs. She was getting dizzy. She turned to her right to find a man staring at her.
"Where are you taking me" she asked
"Princess, your going to go places you've never been before. And your gonna do things you never done before" all three men started laughing. She scrunched up in a ball and leaned her head against the window. The man saw the look on her face. He moved towards her.
"Oh come on girl, we'll have fun. I promise. You'll love it" the man said, Nikkie tried to push him away
"Oh come on Chase. We wanna use her, not scare her" the driver said
"Shut up, I'm the one paying you for this, remember" Chase said
Chase...Chase. The name that she heard the day Jimmy was getting beat up.
"Trust me, your faces scared me already" Nikkie said
"OOHHH" the driver and the passenger said taking it like a diss
"Shut up" he said to them. He turned to Nikkie.
"Babygirl, your gonna have the time of your life. And so are we" Chase said
Nikkie began to cry. She knew what he meant. They were all going to get there way with her. But she wasn't going to allow it.
MEAWHILE....back at the dance
Jimmy was sitting playing with the food on his plate. Music was still pumping. He was feeling sad for the way he did Nikkie. He knew she deserved better than that. He didn't want to hurt her. That's the last thing he would have wanted to do to her. But he did it anyways. He wanted to apologize. But she was no where to be found. He figured she left early for lack of "a good time". Craig walked over to him.
"Hey man" Craig said
"Hey" Jimmy said
"So, having fun yet" Craig asked
"Nope" Jimmy said
"Let me guess....Nikkie won't forgive you so, you feel like garbage" Craig said
"Can you really tell" Jimmy said
"Come on. I thought you were smarter than that" Craig said
"What are you talking about" Jimmy asked
"You have known Nikkie...for a long time. You have to know how she thinks, don't you. Obviously she still loves you. She can't apologize. You know it's killing her to know that you havn't apologized yet" Craig said
"But then when I do, she pushes me away and argues" Jimmy said
"Of course. She has always tried to carry out the argument, but she still knows that you'll end up with her again" Craig said.
Jimmy laughed a little. He realized that he could be having the time of his life, if only he he had just apologized in the first place.
The car pulled up to an abandoned looking building. The guy got out and pulled her out of the car, holding her wrist with a tight grip. He pulled her through the doors of the building.He pulled her up about 3 flights of stairs until they arrived to an abandoned apartment. Inside there were about 3 couches with white sheets covering them. The guy that was driving yelled out for someone.
"Ey Yo, SLIM!, SLIM you here" the man yelled. A guy apeared from the room. He was about 5'10 with light brown tan colored skin. He looked about 18-19. He had short hair being covered with a black du-rag. He had on grey sweatpants, a black long t-shirt and his all black up-towns. He had hazel eyes. She wasn't exactly slim, but he wasn't that big either. For a thug, he was pretty cute, looking somewhat like her ex-boyfriend and friend Junior back in Virginia. He went up to Chase and gave him a pound. He walked towards Nikkie who was struggling form the other mans grip.
"Pucho (pooch-oh), let her go" Slim told the guy who was holding her. He released her wrist and she rubbed them.
"Whose this" Slim asked Chase
"This is the girl that was there the night I fought with that Jimmy boy and Cameron" Chase said
"Oh, why is she here" Slim asked. He seemed like a guy. He may have sold drugs and collected money, but it didn't mean he had to go off to get with all the girls.
"We picked her up, since I didn't get her that night, imma get her tonight" Chase said
"Are you retarded or something" Slim said slapping Chase in the back of the head.
"What" Chase asked
"You just picked up a girl from what, let me guess a building of about a thousand kids and cameras and gaurds, and you let her see your stupid looking faces" Slim said
"I didn't know..we didn't-" Chino said
"You guys are so dumb. I have nothing to do with this. So babygirl, if you plan on telling afterwards, you best leave me out, cause as you can see, I didn't touch" Slim turned to Chase and put his hand on his shoulder and whispered in his ear "Don't mess with her, boy" said Slim as he grabbed his jacket and left.
Nikkie knew he had nothing to do with what was happening. The room was dark and cold. She stood there shivering in her black dress.
"So I guess it's just us" Chino said to Nikkie
"I guess we havn't excatly met. That's Chino, and that's Hugo, Chino's brother" Chase said
Chase pulled her into a room. There was a bed and two windows on opposite sides of the room. Chase pushed her on the bed. He closed the door behind him. Chino and Hugo were left outside. He pulled something from his pocket. She backed up against the back board of the bed. He came beside her.
"You ready" he said. Nikkie was already crying she shook her head. She yelled no, but it was useless. She was somewhere, where no one would find her. He revealed what was in his hand. It was a needle. It was some sort of drug. He poked her with it and within minutes she passed out. He laughed and reached over her. He unbuckled his belt and looked at her body. She lay there motionless. She looked dead. But if she were awake she would feel pain like no other.
Jimmy was home, he tried calling her cellphone but all he got was her machine. He called the house but her mom said she hadn't arrived yet. He decided to wait for tomorrow.
It was morning. Nikkie layed on the bed her dress still on but it was a twisted. Nikkie tried to sit up but she couln't. It was hurting her below her stomach. She pressed her stomach. It had happened, she didn't feel it, she didn't know it was happening, but it did. She had been in a horrible situation. Could you imagine. In a room, drugged up and three guys with you in the room. What would exactly be happening in that room. She slowly stood up. She couldn't really stand. She was still dizzy from the drug. She looked out the window to see a deserted street. No cars, no people, and empty apartment buildings. The door opened. She turned to see Slim. He had a bag.
"Good morning" he said to her. He was dressed in white jeans, a grey t-shirt with a white jean jacket, and the white and grey jordans(12's).
"Hi" was all she could say to him.
"You ok" he asked
"Whach you think" she said
"I'm sorry, Chase got his game. I don't do those things to girls. I respect them. I was brought up better than that" He said
"Then why do you hang with them" Nikkie asked
"They ma cousins. I grew up around dem all. People always looked at me as a thug. So I did what I wanted. Soon enough, I became a street guy. I ain't in no gang, I suprisingly don't do drugs. I hate the crap, and I stay clean. But I do sell the drugs and I get paid for passing it around" Slim said
"Oh, where exactly did you grow up like this" Nikkie asked
"People think I'm from them straight up black communities, but I am half African-American and half Colombian, and I did live in a community where half of the people were black and the rest was either caucasian or hispanic. But I'm not from around here. I'm origianlly from Richmond, Virginia" Slim said
"Seriously, so did I. I mean, I grew up there. I'm quarter Dominican, and quarter African-American and my dad was white, so I grew up with the manners of white famliy" Nikkie was surprised. She knew about the ghetto, and how to act around it all.
"Cool, look, I bought you some food from McDonalds. Eat and I'll take you home" Slim said
"Ok" Nikkie said
Nikkie didn't exactly eat. Her stomach was killing her, so that's the last thing she wanted to do. Nikkie was in the passenger seat. She looked out the window. Tears were falling from her eyes.
"What's wrong" he asked
"Nothing, I just....why...." Nikkie paused
"I know, Chase is a stupid cat. He drives people up the wall. I mean he never learns. He's been on probation before for like 3 years. And he's been in Juvenile Hall at the age of 11" Slim said.
The rest of the ride was quiet. He arrived a few blocks from her house.
"Thanks for taking me home, I mean.." Nikkie said
"It's ok, look here. Call me whenever you need me. Ok. Oh yeah, just so you don't get too scared, Chase only got you. Chino and Hugo got high in the living room, so trust me on it ok." he said giving her a card with his house number and cell munber. With that he drove away.
Nikkie walked slowly with her stomach still hurting. She felt herself walking crooked. She began to cry. Her braids were a bit messy and her dress was a little bit dirty. She then heard someone call her name. Nikkie turned around and saw Sean.
"Nikkie, where were you last night, everyone was looking for you" he said
"I was...." Nikkie said
"What happened to you" Sean asked observing the look on her face and the profile of her body and dress.
"Nothing" Nikkie said
"Nikkie, please" Sean said
"Sean, just leave me alone, I need to be home" Nikkie yelled as she walked as fats as she could. He grabbed her by the shoulder and turned her around.
"SEAN!" she yelled. He looked down and said
"What happened, I can tell you didn't exactly have the time of your life last night" Sean said
"Sean, I feel terrible.......those guys, that you fought with. They took me last night. One of them......raped me last night" Nikkie said a she began to cry.
"What?....they..." Sean stopped and hugged her and let her cry on his shoulder.
"Can you just do me one favor and tell my mother I was sleeping over at your house, please" Nikkie said
"Sure, but are you gonna tell anyone" Sean asked
"Not yet" Nikkie said
"Ok" Sean said
When she arrived in her house around 6:00. It was Wensday and her mother believed the story that Nikkie had gotten tired and stayed at Sean's. But she didn't call because she had accidentally left her purse and Manny had brought it home for her.
Nikkie got into the shower and changed into a short black jean skirt and she slipped on her white belt with her name plate on it. She put on a white wife beater that had a few black stars on it and she put on her all white uptowns. She took out her braids and passed the flat iron through her hair. She tied it up in a pretty bun, with strands falling from it. She slipped on her silver hoops. She went down stairs and told her mother she was going out.
"Honey, why are you walking that way" Kayla asked
"Oh, that, my knees feel out of place, so I guess I gotta walk to pop them back into place" Nikkie said
"Ok, well don't stress yourself. You have school" Kayla said. Nikkie walked out and sighed with relief. She walked a little bit. She began walking towards the school. She saw no one. She went towards the basketball court. She sat down on the bench. She crossed her legs and sat back. She closed her eyes and thought. She thought of everything. She sat as she heard the loud music from across the street pump throughout her body. It was "The Reason" by Hoobastank. All she could think of was Jimmy. How she missed him, how she was planning on apologizing to Jimmy.
I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
MEANWHILE.....
Jimmy walked down the street. He also heard the music playing loud. He realized how much the words connected to what he had done to Nikkie. He wanted to hold her again. He wanted her to trust him again.
I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You
He walked towards the building. He noticed it was still early. It was empty. But he saw someone sitting near the basketball court. He thought it might just be anyone. Until he heard soft crying. He realized it was her. NIKKIE. He had his chance. As the song was finishing it's final words. He walked towards the gate. He hooked his fingers on the gate and looked down at her.
"Nikkie" he said softly. Nikkie froze. She wiped her tears and turned around and saw Jimmy standing on the opposite side of the gate. She smiled a little. He smiled back. He ran towards the entrance of the gate and so did Nikkie. When they arrived at the entrance. They froze. They started at each other. But Jimmy opened up.
"I'm sorry" he said. Nikkie smiled. And she reached her arms around his neck and hugged him. She felt like she was home again. Like before she was lost, and she found her way back. She felt secure again. She felt whole. She felt......loved. Nikkie said she was sorry. They talked for a while. How they felt during the seperation.
"You know, that I love you. And I never meant to hurt you" Jimmy said as she sat beside him and he cradled her.
"I know, but....there's more to the story" Nikkie said
"What do you mean" Jimmy asked
"Jimmy, you have to understand where I'm coming from, ok" Nikkie said
Jimmy looked confused. He didn't understand. Nikkie breathed in and paused. She breathed out.
Author's Note: I know, I know. This chapter's a bit different than any of the other ones. It has more graphics, but I try to keep it clean. I don't want a dirty story. I want it tip-top, like the real show, but a little kick and spice in it.
Enjoy. 2 to 3 more chapters coming.
This chapter of "Where I'll Always Be" contains diolouge containing, violence, drug abuse, mild language, and slight graphic diolouge of rape. The nature of this chapter has been kept as clean as possible. Rated PG-13.
THANK YOU AND ENJOY.
Where I'll Always Be
Chapter 31:Confessions of the Heart
Nikkie was in the back of the car unconcious. When he had thrown her in the car she had banged her head on the window on the other side. The guy was driving like crazy. He was heading far from town. Suddenly Nikkie began to squirm. She had woken up. She looked around and didn't notice where she was. She saw that the window was fogged up and water droplets covered it too. She saw a man in the front passenger seat smoking drugs. She was getting dizzy. She turned to her right to find a man staring at her.
"Where are you taking me" she asked
"Princess, your going to go places you've never been before. And your gonna do things you never done before" all three men started laughing. She scrunched up in a ball and leaned her head against the window. The man saw the look on her face. He moved towards her.
"Oh come on girl, we'll have fun. I promise. You'll love it" the man said, Nikkie tried to push him away
"Oh come on Chase. We wanna use her, not scare her" the driver said
"Shut up, I'm the one paying you for this, remember" Chase said
Chase...Chase. The name that she heard the day Jimmy was getting beat up.
"Trust me, your faces scared me already" Nikkie said
"OOHHH" the driver and the passenger said taking it like a diss
"Shut up" he said to them. He turned to Nikkie.
"Babygirl, your gonna have the time of your life. And so are we" Chase said
Nikkie began to cry. She knew what he meant. They were all going to get there way with her. But she wasn't going to allow it.
MEAWHILE....back at the dance
Jimmy was sitting playing with the food on his plate. Music was still pumping. He was feeling sad for the way he did Nikkie. He knew she deserved better than that. He didn't want to hurt her. That's the last thing he would have wanted to do to her. But he did it anyways. He wanted to apologize. But she was no where to be found. He figured she left early for lack of "a good time". Craig walked over to him.
"Hey man" Craig said
"Hey" Jimmy said
"So, having fun yet" Craig asked
"Nope" Jimmy said
"Let me guess....Nikkie won't forgive you so, you feel like garbage" Craig said
"Can you really tell" Jimmy said
"Come on. I thought you were smarter than that" Craig said
"What are you talking about" Jimmy asked
"You have known Nikkie...for a long time. You have to know how she thinks, don't you. Obviously she still loves you. She can't apologize. You know it's killing her to know that you havn't apologized yet" Craig said
"But then when I do, she pushes me away and argues" Jimmy said
"Of course. She has always tried to carry out the argument, but she still knows that you'll end up with her again" Craig said.
Jimmy laughed a little. He realized that he could be having the time of his life, if only he he had just apologized in the first place.
The car pulled up to an abandoned looking building. The guy got out and pulled her out of the car, holding her wrist with a tight grip. He pulled her through the doors of the building.He pulled her up about 3 flights of stairs until they arrived to an abandoned apartment. Inside there were about 3 couches with white sheets covering them. The guy that was driving yelled out for someone.
"Ey Yo, SLIM!, SLIM you here" the man yelled. A guy apeared from the room. He was about 5'10 with light brown tan colored skin. He looked about 18-19. He had short hair being covered with a black du-rag. He had on grey sweatpants, a black long t-shirt and his all black up-towns. He had hazel eyes. She wasn't exactly slim, but he wasn't that big either. For a thug, he was pretty cute, looking somewhat like her ex-boyfriend and friend Junior back in Virginia. He went up to Chase and gave him a pound. He walked towards Nikkie who was struggling form the other mans grip.
"Pucho (pooch-oh), let her go" Slim told the guy who was holding her. He released her wrist and she rubbed them.
"Whose this" Slim asked Chase
"This is the girl that was there the night I fought with that Jimmy boy and Cameron" Chase said
"Oh, why is she here" Slim asked. He seemed like a guy. He may have sold drugs and collected money, but it didn't mean he had to go off to get with all the girls.
"We picked her up, since I didn't get her that night, imma get her tonight" Chase said
"Are you retarded or something" Slim said slapping Chase in the back of the head.
"What" Chase asked
"You just picked up a girl from what, let me guess a building of about a thousand kids and cameras and gaurds, and you let her see your stupid looking faces" Slim said
"I didn't know..we didn't-" Chino said
"You guys are so dumb. I have nothing to do with this. So babygirl, if you plan on telling afterwards, you best leave me out, cause as you can see, I didn't touch" Slim turned to Chase and put his hand on his shoulder and whispered in his ear "Don't mess with her, boy" said Slim as he grabbed his jacket and left.
Nikkie knew he had nothing to do with what was happening. The room was dark and cold. She stood there shivering in her black dress.
"So I guess it's just us" Chino said to Nikkie
"I guess we havn't excatly met. That's Chino, and that's Hugo, Chino's brother" Chase said
Chase pulled her into a room. There was a bed and two windows on opposite sides of the room. Chase pushed her on the bed. He closed the door behind him. Chino and Hugo were left outside. He pulled something from his pocket. She backed up against the back board of the bed. He came beside her.
"You ready" he said. Nikkie was already crying she shook her head. She yelled no, but it was useless. She was somewhere, where no one would find her. He revealed what was in his hand. It was a needle. It was some sort of drug. He poked her with it and within minutes she passed out. He laughed and reached over her. He unbuckled his belt and looked at her body. She lay there motionless. She looked dead. But if she were awake she would feel pain like no other.
Jimmy was home, he tried calling her cellphone but all he got was her machine. He called the house but her mom said she hadn't arrived yet. He decided to wait for tomorrow.
It was morning. Nikkie layed on the bed her dress still on but it was a twisted. Nikkie tried to sit up but she couln't. It was hurting her below her stomach. She pressed her stomach. It had happened, she didn't feel it, she didn't know it was happening, but it did. She had been in a horrible situation. Could you imagine. In a room, drugged up and three guys with you in the room. What would exactly be happening in that room. She slowly stood up. She couldn't really stand. She was still dizzy from the drug. She looked out the window to see a deserted street. No cars, no people, and empty apartment buildings. The door opened. She turned to see Slim. He had a bag.
"Good morning" he said to her. He was dressed in white jeans, a grey t-shirt with a white jean jacket, and the white and grey jordans(12's).
"Hi" was all she could say to him.
"You ok" he asked
"Whach you think" she said
"I'm sorry, Chase got his game. I don't do those things to girls. I respect them. I was brought up better than that" He said
"Then why do you hang with them" Nikkie asked
"They ma cousins. I grew up around dem all. People always looked at me as a thug. So I did what I wanted. Soon enough, I became a street guy. I ain't in no gang, I suprisingly don't do drugs. I hate the crap, and I stay clean. But I do sell the drugs and I get paid for passing it around" Slim said
"Oh, where exactly did you grow up like this" Nikkie asked
"People think I'm from them straight up black communities, but I am half African-American and half Colombian, and I did live in a community where half of the people were black and the rest was either caucasian or hispanic. But I'm not from around here. I'm origianlly from Richmond, Virginia" Slim said
"Seriously, so did I. I mean, I grew up there. I'm quarter Dominican, and quarter African-American and my dad was white, so I grew up with the manners of white famliy" Nikkie was surprised. She knew about the ghetto, and how to act around it all.
"Cool, look, I bought you some food from McDonalds. Eat and I'll take you home" Slim said
"Ok" Nikkie said
Nikkie didn't exactly eat. Her stomach was killing her, so that's the last thing she wanted to do. Nikkie was in the passenger seat. She looked out the window. Tears were falling from her eyes.
"What's wrong" he asked
"Nothing, I just....why...." Nikkie paused
"I know, Chase is a stupid cat. He drives people up the wall. I mean he never learns. He's been on probation before for like 3 years. And he's been in Juvenile Hall at the age of 11" Slim said.
The rest of the ride was quiet. He arrived a few blocks from her house.
"Thanks for taking me home, I mean.." Nikkie said
"It's ok, look here. Call me whenever you need me. Ok. Oh yeah, just so you don't get too scared, Chase only got you. Chino and Hugo got high in the living room, so trust me on it ok." he said giving her a card with his house number and cell munber. With that he drove away.
Nikkie walked slowly with her stomach still hurting. She felt herself walking crooked. She began to cry. Her braids were a bit messy and her dress was a little bit dirty. She then heard someone call her name. Nikkie turned around and saw Sean.
"Nikkie, where were you last night, everyone was looking for you" he said
"I was...." Nikkie said
"What happened to you" Sean asked observing the look on her face and the profile of her body and dress.
"Nothing" Nikkie said
"Nikkie, please" Sean said
"Sean, just leave me alone, I need to be home" Nikkie yelled as she walked as fats as she could. He grabbed her by the shoulder and turned her around.
"SEAN!" she yelled. He looked down and said
"What happened, I can tell you didn't exactly have the time of your life last night" Sean said
"Sean, I feel terrible.......those guys, that you fought with. They took me last night. One of them......raped me last night" Nikkie said a she began to cry.
"What?....they..." Sean stopped and hugged her and let her cry on his shoulder.
"Can you just do me one favor and tell my mother I was sleeping over at your house, please" Nikkie said
"Sure, but are you gonna tell anyone" Sean asked
"Not yet" Nikkie said
"Ok" Sean said
When she arrived in her house around 6:00. It was Wensday and her mother believed the story that Nikkie had gotten tired and stayed at Sean's. But she didn't call because she had accidentally left her purse and Manny had brought it home for her.
Nikkie got into the shower and changed into a short black jean skirt and she slipped on her white belt with her name plate on it. She put on a white wife beater that had a few black stars on it and she put on her all white uptowns. She took out her braids and passed the flat iron through her hair. She tied it up in a pretty bun, with strands falling from it. She slipped on her silver hoops. She went down stairs and told her mother she was going out.
"Honey, why are you walking that way" Kayla asked
"Oh, that, my knees feel out of place, so I guess I gotta walk to pop them back into place" Nikkie said
"Ok, well don't stress yourself. You have school" Kayla said. Nikkie walked out and sighed with relief. She walked a little bit. She began walking towards the school. She saw no one. She went towards the basketball court. She sat down on the bench. She crossed her legs and sat back. She closed her eyes and thought. She thought of everything. She sat as she heard the loud music from across the street pump throughout her body. It was "The Reason" by Hoobastank. All she could think of was Jimmy. How she missed him, how she was planning on apologizing to Jimmy.
I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is you
MEANWHILE.....
Jimmy walked down the street. He also heard the music playing loud. He realized how much the words connected to what he had done to Nikkie. He wanted to hold her again. He wanted her to trust him again.
I'm sorry that I hurt you
It's something I must live with everyday
And all the pain I put you through
I wish that I could take it all away
And be the one who catches all your tears
Thats why i need you to hear
I've found a reason for me
To change who I used to be
A reason to start over new
and the reason is You
He walked towards the building. He noticed it was still early. It was empty. But he saw someone sitting near the basketball court. He thought it might just be anyone. Until he heard soft crying. He realized it was her. NIKKIE. He had his chance. As the song was finishing it's final words. He walked towards the gate. He hooked his fingers on the gate and looked down at her.
"Nikkie" he said softly. Nikkie froze. She wiped her tears and turned around and saw Jimmy standing on the opposite side of the gate. She smiled a little. He smiled back. He ran towards the entrance of the gate and so did Nikkie. When they arrived at the entrance. They froze. They started at each other. But Jimmy opened up.
"I'm sorry" he said. Nikkie smiled. And she reached her arms around his neck and hugged him. She felt like she was home again. Like before she was lost, and she found her way back. She felt secure again. She felt whole. She felt......loved. Nikkie said she was sorry. They talked for a while. How they felt during the seperation.
"You know, that I love you. And I never meant to hurt you" Jimmy said as she sat beside him and he cradled her.
"I know, but....there's more to the story" Nikkie said
"What do you mean" Jimmy asked
"Jimmy, you have to understand where I'm coming from, ok" Nikkie said
Jimmy looked confused. He didn't understand. Nikkie breathed in and paused. She breathed out.
Author's Note: I know, I know. This chapter's a bit different than any of the other ones. It has more graphics, but I try to keep it clean. I don't want a dirty story. I want it tip-top, like the real show, but a little kick and spice in it.
Enjoy. 2 to 3 more chapters coming.