"Hello?" I said, hoping John was on the other end of the line.
"Hello, May I please speak to Mrs. Carter?" An unfamiliar voice replied.
"This is she."
"Mrs. Carter, I am calling you to tell you that we are treating your husband at Beaumont Hospital. Could you please come here as soon as possible?" I felt my heart leap into my throat. A million questions were running through my head.
"Is he all right? What happened? When did he get there?" I knew that I wasn't going to get any answers but I still needed to ask those questions.
" I am not authorized to tell you that information but when you get here, I'm sure the doctor treating him will tell you everything."
"Yes... thank you. I'll be there as soon as possible." I hung up the phone and ran to Jonathan's room. I silently prayed that nothing bad had happened to John. I flipped on the night light and started to wake Jonathan up.
"Jonathan, sweetie, you have to get up." I watched as he opened his sleepy eyes, confused. "Sweetie, you need to get up so Mommy can put your shoes on." He sat up, rubbing his eyes. I quickly grabbed socks and shoes and began putting them on his feet.
"Where are we going?" he asked.
"We need to go and get Daddy." I didn't want to say anymore because if I did, my voice would have broke. After I put his shoes on, I picked him up and headed for the door. I grabbed ours coats, my keys and purse and immediately went out the door. I strapped Jonathan into his car seat and wrapped his coat around him. He was already falling back to sleep. I hurriedly put my coat on and got into the car. I put the keys into the ignition and made my way to Beaumont.
About twenty minutes later I arrived at Beaumont. I unstrapped Jonathan
from his car seat and picked him up. He was still sleeping and his body
was heavy on my shoulder. I ran through the doors of the ER and made my
way towards the main desk. I bored looking woman stared up at me.
"Can I help you?" She asked.
"I'm looking for my husband, John Carter." I told the receptionist,
breathless. Her face softened a little and she spoke.
"Have a seat over there, the doctor will be with you shortly." I looked
to where she motioned to, a small array of chairs were set up. I nodded
and made my way to those chairs. I sat down, Jonathan in my lap, still
asleep, I prayed that nothing bad had happened to John. I sat there for
almost an hour before I saw a doctor approach the main desk. He said something
to the receptionist and she pointed in my direction. I inhaled sharply
as he walked towards me.
"Mrs. Carter?" he asked politely. I nodded my head, afraid to speak.
He looked as Jonathan, a sad smile on his face. Oh God, why did he look
like that? Please, please, tell me John is okay. "I'm Dr. Kendall, I treated
your husband." Treated? Shouldn't he be saying treating? I stayed silent
as he continued. "Mr. Carter came in with severe internal injuries due
to a car accident. We took him up to the operating room but the damage
was too extensive. I'm sorry, your husband died."
I sat there numb. I couldn't have heard correctly. He couldn't have
died. No. NO.
"No, there must be some mistake...John.. He couldn't have..." I plead
with the doctor, tears threatening to escape my eyes. "Today was his last
day at the clinic, We're going to have another baby soon... he was taking
a vacation... No..please tell me he's okay..." I looked up at the doctor,
the same sad, sympathetic look on his face. I let the tears fall.
"I'm sorry." He said again. " Is there anyone I can call?" I shook
my head. I didn't know many people here, and the few people I did know,
well, they were mostly John's friends. I watched as the doctor stood up
and walked away. I could feel Jonathan stirring. He opened his eyes and
looked up at me.
"Mommy, why are you crying?" he asked. It broke my heart to look at
him. He was going to grow up without his father in his life and so was
the baby inside me. I wiped the tears from my eyes before answering him.
"Because Mommy is very sad right now." I told him. He just kept looking
at me.
"Why?" How was I going to explain to him that his Daddy wasn't going
to come home again? I looked into Jonathan's eyes and knew right then that
this was going to be the hardest thing I would ever have to do in my life.
