AN: So I know that there's a lot of Brooke pregnant drama, so I decided to
mix it up a bit. Thanks for reading, it really means a lot ! (It would mean
even more if you review, too! I'm definitely a review-whore so please
please!)
Description: Okay so to clear a few things up, there are some really tricky flashbacks that didn't happen exactly like you prolly remember them. So just read it like you would any story, I'll explain as I go along. But okay quick overview, Peyton never told Lucas she didn't want to be with him, they just kind of didn't get a chance to talk about it. Haley and Nathan are broken up at this time in the story, Brooke is still pissed. Yeah. I think that's everything. Just read and find out. I know whether this will end up being a Naley or a Laley, but it's part of the suspense so pleeeease forgive me for not telling!
Disclaimer: I own everything on the WB. (Yeah I'm totally kidding. But I got your attention, right? Hehe)
Enjoy!
The Surprise: by grace
Tears were already racing down her face as she stood outside his door, as she had a thousand times before. Her breath was shallow and she was rocking on the balls of her feet, a million different things running through her mind.
She raised her hand to knock and found that she couldn't, it was too painful, too hard. Her knuckles were white and her face was pale, void of makeup and any sign of life at all except for the tears that wouldn't stop falling.
She stood there for what must have been five minutes, debating on whether to knock or follow her gut instinct and run. Her breath came in short gasps as she watched the sun's brilliant light reflect on the windowpane, sending her torn face into sharp relief.
The door opened.
"Haley? What's wrong?" Concern appeared in Lucas's eyes and he ushered her inside. They sat on his bed. Without preamble she threw herself into his chest and cried. Her body shook and Lucas tried to control it, hugging her tightly but gently against his chest. Lucas sat there shocked for a moment, seeing his best friend wretch with such power. He hadn't seen her cry this way in a few years now and it scared him.
"Shh...Hales? Hales what's wrong?" He asked her soothingly, petting her hair in the way his mother always did.
For a moment, she couldn't speak. She couldn't bear to let the moment end; she couldn't bear to let Lucas think any less of her. She didn't want to tear him apart...
Couldn't their lives just be simple forever?
"I-I..." She shook her head. "I don't know how it happened...well, I do, I just don't..."
"Just calm down." He waited patiently for her to stop crying and for her to look him in the eye. "Now please tell me." He was getting scared now.
"I'm pregnant," She whispered to her hands. She bit her lip, ready for the cries of outrage, the looks of disgust, the accusations...but they didn't come. She looked up to see Lucas staring blankly at a wall, his lower lip jutting just slightly out in what Haley took as confusion, maybe silent rage.
"What?" His voice was calm, monotone, as if he wasn't sure he had heard her right. But of course he did. Damn him for making her say it again.
"I don't know how it happened...I haven't been with anyone...except for..." Her eyes opened wide as Lucas waited for her to finish her sentence. But she wouldn't.
"Except for who, Haley?" His voice was a little higher.
"Well..." Her cheeks burned at the thought. Lucas ran his fingers through his hair distractedly. She took a deep breath, bracing herself.
"Nathan."
Lucas swore under his breath and looked out into the fading sky, its brilliant rays fading into night. They sat silently, Haley chewing her nails nervously, feeling as though she might throw up.
Instantly the air between them was filled with the thick hatred Lucas and his brother had for each other. Memories flitted between them and they came to a soundless understanding that the memories would lie in the past, and that neither of them would bring any of it up. Haley gulped.
And she thought that coming to him would be easier than going to Nathan.
"But I don't know if it was him," She said, licking her lips in a
nervous way, trying to make amends for the pain she had brought to
Lucas's face.
"Lucas, I need to tell you something, but I need you to promise not to
judge me."
"Go on." His eyes told her that he wouldn't. She trusted him more than anyone just then. Haley took a deep breath.
"Well...the night after Nathan and I had a fight...he blamed a bunch of things on you and I got mad... I-I went to that party at Tim's. And...I don't...I don't...remember much of anything." She bit her lip and stared determinedly at the bedspread, bracing herself for the next part. "But I woke up the next morning, and...I...it was...I was in the guest bed at Tim's house. And I'm...I'm pretty sure that I...that I..." She couldn't finish and she broke out in fresh sobs.
Lucas wrapped his arm protectively around her. "Shh...it's okay." His eyes grew wide as realization hit him. He couldn't tell her...but he had to...
"Hales?" Haley looked up at his nervous tone. He fingered his bedspread, the soft, hand stitched quilt his mom had made him, tilting his head nervously to one side. Haley had seen him like this before, but it never ended in anything she liked to hear. "I was at the party too...I-I...I know who you were with." His mind flashed back to a drunken Haley, disappearing into a dark room with a giggle. She searched his body language and face but found nothing.
"Who?"
"I woke up at Tim's house too." This was so hard. His throat was constricting, choking off his last word. Her eyes looked questioningly into his and he looked away. "I woke up next to you."
She opened her mouth, and closed it again, staring at him with wide curious eyes.
"I...we...we?" Was all she could manage. She gave a small gasp and looked away from him, unable to believe it.
"I'm so sorry, Hales. I didn't mean to. I was upset over the whole Brooke and Peyton thing, and...you...were... I was so wasted." He shrugged with a helpless sigh. "I'm so sorry."
"We're going to be parents?" Haley whispered to him, subconsciously holding her stomach. Lucas took a deep breath, but he knew that he was doing the right thing.
"Well, we don't know for sure." But when he looked into her eyes, he knew that he would be the father. Haley. The woman who he was going to be with for the rest of his life.
"What are we going to do?" She asked him tearfully. She curled up beside him and cried again. They lay there for a long time until they fell asleep. Lucas's arm protectively wrapped around her, and her face buried into his shoulder.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
FLASHBACK: Karen's Café, night.
"I...believe...this is heaven to me..." Haley's words rang out and Nathan watched her with admiration. She felt her eyes on him, and she ended the song with a long, shaky note, her fingers dancing briskly on the piano.
Nathan came up to her and wrapped his arms around her waist, burying his face in her neck, tickling her with his soft breath. She smiled.
"That was beautiful," He whispered to her.
"Thanks."
"Where did you learn to sing like that?"
"Actually, Karen taught me some of it. I took lessons with her back in middle school." She grinned. "This was my favorite song. I remember she sang it to me and I was instantly in love with it. I've never seen anyone sing it more beautifully."
"I have." He grinned. She slapped his knee. "No, I'm serious. That was amazing."
"You're amazing." She kissed him, melting into his arms. His hand went down to rest on her stomach, massaging it gently.
"I know." He joked. She laughed, twisting around so she was facing him. He looked at her seriously. "You know, I'm really glad you've been here for me. I don't think I could have gotten through all this without you."
Haley smiled.
"I love you." He said to her, his finger trailing her cheekbone.
"I...I love you too." She said with a content smile, wondering when the last time was that she had been this happy. Never. She brushed her lips against his and then gave him a hug. "I'm just glad I could be there for you."
"Me too." It was quiet for a moment, the sweet silence surrounding them and the comfort of the moment. "I just wish they would stop fighting."
"I know. It'll be okay. At least you have options now."
"Yeah. But I don't know what I should do. I mean, my mom left me and Dad for a while to live out some secret fling, and my dad is an insane control freak who frequently pisses me off. I don't want to live with either one of them."
"Well," Haley said, giving him butterfly kisses on his neck, which sent shivers down Haley's spine. "You could come live with me." She let her sentence trail off suggestively. Nathan wiggled his eyebrows and Haley giggled.
"Yeah. Then they would be sorry." Nathan fell silent again and looked out the dark window. "I'm just wondering..."
"What?"
"I want to know why my dad is such an ass. He just...I don't know." He sighed. "I mean, I could understand my mom's wanting to run away from him if he had been such a jerk back then...but...I can't seem to come up with an excuse for him." He shrugged. "Maybe if Lucas hadn't been around, things would be different."
Haley tensed in his arms. He looked at her.
"What do you mean?" She asked.
"Well," Said Nathan hesitantly, aware that he was treading on thing ice. "My dad has always been this way, ever since I was really little. I'm told that he wasn't always like this, though, that he was once a great guy and everything."
Haley raised her eyebrows. "When?"
"Before Lucas was born. When that happened, I guess the world just stopped for him and he became this psycho person. I dunno. It just makes me wonder what would have happened if Lucas hadn't been born...there wouldn't be all of these problems, I guess."
Haley was suddenly cold, stiff in Nathan's warm embrace.
"What?" He asked her.
"That's a terrible thing to say. You don't mean that. You know that Lucas has nothing to do with your parent's divorce?" Her eyes were pleading, giving him the chance to take back what he said.
Nathan shook his head. There was so much bottled up inside him, so make rage and confusion about his parents, that he didn't really know what the reason was anymore. He clenched and unclenched his hands, searching the floor for answers with his eyes. "I think that things would have been simpler," He shrugged. He knew that she cared for Lucas, but he didn't really care at the moment. The pain was too great.
Haley untwined herself from his arms and went over to the counter where her coffee was sitting.
"Hales?"
"I can't believe you're blaming your problems on Lucas, Nathan. This has absolutely nothing to do with him. You're just reaching for answers that aren't there...you're wrong."
Nathan bristled. "I forgot," He said, his tone suddenly colder. "You have to defend him. You love him."
Haley stared at Nathan. "Lucas is like my brother." She said simply.
"Yeah, well, Lucas IS my brother and I don't enjoy a damn minute of it!" He said, his voice rising. "But maybe you like having him around...maybe you like him as MORE than a brother..."
Haley rolled her eyes. "Nathan, you're crazy."
"Am I?" He seethed. "You've always stuck up for him. ALWAYS. Even against me. You're BOYFRIEND. The guy you said you loved, remember? Don't I mean anything? I'm so sick of Lucas being this perfect person in your head, while I am just some poor rich kid with a messed up family."
"Nathan!" Haley said, the coffee halfway to her lips again, her mouth open in shock. "How could you think that? That's not how I see you...OR Lucas. Is that why you are blaming all of this stuff on him? Because you think I think he's better than you or something? Are you jealous?"
"Of WHAT?" He looked outraged. "Of the fact that my girlfriend thinks he's some sort of GOD while I appear to be some messed up kid with a bunch of problems? Yeah, I guess you could say that. I'm just wondering why you are with me and not with him."
"Because I love you," Haley said quietly, tears appearing in her eyes. "I love you, Nathan. Not Lucas. Not the thought of Lucas. You."
Nathan said nothing.
"If I loved Lucas, would I have told you that I loved you? Would I be with you at all right now? His sworn enemy?" She stood and went up to him, and looked him in the eye, with an attempt at a teasing smile. He looked away. "Nathan, I love you because you're you. The fact that you're family is messed up doesn't bother me. The fact that you think that it does bother me, bothers me. You know me." Her eyes pleaded with him but he refused to look at her.
Haley sighed and picked up her jacket, tears racing down her cheeks. "Your decisions are what's causing problems right now, Nathan." She opened her mouth again, ready to say something more, but closed it and shook her head, thinking better of it, and slipped out of the door and into the night.
END OF FLASHBACK
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Like it? LOVE it? (yea!) haha well there's this fabulous little review thing you can do to let me know (you know, they don't put them on here for nothing!)
If you don't want me to continue, please by all means don't review! Tehe okay NOW I'm done.
NEXT TIME on Protecting her always: The secret is shared with Peyton...how will she react? Haley comes face to face with Nathan for the first time since she found out.
Description: Okay so to clear a few things up, there are some really tricky flashbacks that didn't happen exactly like you prolly remember them. So just read it like you would any story, I'll explain as I go along. But okay quick overview, Peyton never told Lucas she didn't want to be with him, they just kind of didn't get a chance to talk about it. Haley and Nathan are broken up at this time in the story, Brooke is still pissed. Yeah. I think that's everything. Just read and find out. I know whether this will end up being a Naley or a Laley, but it's part of the suspense so pleeeease forgive me for not telling!
Disclaimer: I own everything on the WB. (Yeah I'm totally kidding. But I got your attention, right? Hehe)
Enjoy!
The Surprise: by grace
Tears were already racing down her face as she stood outside his door, as she had a thousand times before. Her breath was shallow and she was rocking on the balls of her feet, a million different things running through her mind.
She raised her hand to knock and found that she couldn't, it was too painful, too hard. Her knuckles were white and her face was pale, void of makeup and any sign of life at all except for the tears that wouldn't stop falling.
She stood there for what must have been five minutes, debating on whether to knock or follow her gut instinct and run. Her breath came in short gasps as she watched the sun's brilliant light reflect on the windowpane, sending her torn face into sharp relief.
The door opened.
"Haley? What's wrong?" Concern appeared in Lucas's eyes and he ushered her inside. They sat on his bed. Without preamble she threw herself into his chest and cried. Her body shook and Lucas tried to control it, hugging her tightly but gently against his chest. Lucas sat there shocked for a moment, seeing his best friend wretch with such power. He hadn't seen her cry this way in a few years now and it scared him.
"Shh...Hales? Hales what's wrong?" He asked her soothingly, petting her hair in the way his mother always did.
For a moment, she couldn't speak. She couldn't bear to let the moment end; she couldn't bear to let Lucas think any less of her. She didn't want to tear him apart...
Couldn't their lives just be simple forever?
"I-I..." She shook her head. "I don't know how it happened...well, I do, I just don't..."
"Just calm down." He waited patiently for her to stop crying and for her to look him in the eye. "Now please tell me." He was getting scared now.
"I'm pregnant," She whispered to her hands. She bit her lip, ready for the cries of outrage, the looks of disgust, the accusations...but they didn't come. She looked up to see Lucas staring blankly at a wall, his lower lip jutting just slightly out in what Haley took as confusion, maybe silent rage.
"What?" His voice was calm, monotone, as if he wasn't sure he had heard her right. But of course he did. Damn him for making her say it again.
"I don't know how it happened...I haven't been with anyone...except for..." Her eyes opened wide as Lucas waited for her to finish her sentence. But she wouldn't.
"Except for who, Haley?" His voice was a little higher.
"Well..." Her cheeks burned at the thought. Lucas ran his fingers through his hair distractedly. She took a deep breath, bracing herself.
"Nathan."
Lucas swore under his breath and looked out into the fading sky, its brilliant rays fading into night. They sat silently, Haley chewing her nails nervously, feeling as though she might throw up.
Instantly the air between them was filled with the thick hatred Lucas and his brother had for each other. Memories flitted between them and they came to a soundless understanding that the memories would lie in the past, and that neither of them would bring any of it up. Haley gulped.
And she thought that coming to him would be easier than going to Nathan.
"But I don't know if it was him," She said, licking her lips in a
nervous way, trying to make amends for the pain she had brought to
Lucas's face.
"Lucas, I need to tell you something, but I need you to promise not to
judge me."
"Go on." His eyes told her that he wouldn't. She trusted him more than anyone just then. Haley took a deep breath.
"Well...the night after Nathan and I had a fight...he blamed a bunch of things on you and I got mad... I-I went to that party at Tim's. And...I don't...I don't...remember much of anything." She bit her lip and stared determinedly at the bedspread, bracing herself for the next part. "But I woke up the next morning, and...I...it was...I was in the guest bed at Tim's house. And I'm...I'm pretty sure that I...that I..." She couldn't finish and she broke out in fresh sobs.
Lucas wrapped his arm protectively around her. "Shh...it's okay." His eyes grew wide as realization hit him. He couldn't tell her...but he had to...
"Hales?" Haley looked up at his nervous tone. He fingered his bedspread, the soft, hand stitched quilt his mom had made him, tilting his head nervously to one side. Haley had seen him like this before, but it never ended in anything she liked to hear. "I was at the party too...I-I...I know who you were with." His mind flashed back to a drunken Haley, disappearing into a dark room with a giggle. She searched his body language and face but found nothing.
"Who?"
"I woke up at Tim's house too." This was so hard. His throat was constricting, choking off his last word. Her eyes looked questioningly into his and he looked away. "I woke up next to you."
She opened her mouth, and closed it again, staring at him with wide curious eyes.
"I...we...we?" Was all she could manage. She gave a small gasp and looked away from him, unable to believe it.
"I'm so sorry, Hales. I didn't mean to. I was upset over the whole Brooke and Peyton thing, and...you...were... I was so wasted." He shrugged with a helpless sigh. "I'm so sorry."
"We're going to be parents?" Haley whispered to him, subconsciously holding her stomach. Lucas took a deep breath, but he knew that he was doing the right thing.
"Well, we don't know for sure." But when he looked into her eyes, he knew that he would be the father. Haley. The woman who he was going to be with for the rest of his life.
"What are we going to do?" She asked him tearfully. She curled up beside him and cried again. They lay there for a long time until they fell asleep. Lucas's arm protectively wrapped around her, and her face buried into his shoulder.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
FLASHBACK: Karen's Café, night.
"I...believe...this is heaven to me..." Haley's words rang out and Nathan watched her with admiration. She felt her eyes on him, and she ended the song with a long, shaky note, her fingers dancing briskly on the piano.
Nathan came up to her and wrapped his arms around her waist, burying his face in her neck, tickling her with his soft breath. She smiled.
"That was beautiful," He whispered to her.
"Thanks."
"Where did you learn to sing like that?"
"Actually, Karen taught me some of it. I took lessons with her back in middle school." She grinned. "This was my favorite song. I remember she sang it to me and I was instantly in love with it. I've never seen anyone sing it more beautifully."
"I have." He grinned. She slapped his knee. "No, I'm serious. That was amazing."
"You're amazing." She kissed him, melting into his arms. His hand went down to rest on her stomach, massaging it gently.
"I know." He joked. She laughed, twisting around so she was facing him. He looked at her seriously. "You know, I'm really glad you've been here for me. I don't think I could have gotten through all this without you."
Haley smiled.
"I love you." He said to her, his finger trailing her cheekbone.
"I...I love you too." She said with a content smile, wondering when the last time was that she had been this happy. Never. She brushed her lips against his and then gave him a hug. "I'm just glad I could be there for you."
"Me too." It was quiet for a moment, the sweet silence surrounding them and the comfort of the moment. "I just wish they would stop fighting."
"I know. It'll be okay. At least you have options now."
"Yeah. But I don't know what I should do. I mean, my mom left me and Dad for a while to live out some secret fling, and my dad is an insane control freak who frequently pisses me off. I don't want to live with either one of them."
"Well," Haley said, giving him butterfly kisses on his neck, which sent shivers down Haley's spine. "You could come live with me." She let her sentence trail off suggestively. Nathan wiggled his eyebrows and Haley giggled.
"Yeah. Then they would be sorry." Nathan fell silent again and looked out the dark window. "I'm just wondering..."
"What?"
"I want to know why my dad is such an ass. He just...I don't know." He sighed. "I mean, I could understand my mom's wanting to run away from him if he had been such a jerk back then...but...I can't seem to come up with an excuse for him." He shrugged. "Maybe if Lucas hadn't been around, things would be different."
Haley tensed in his arms. He looked at her.
"What do you mean?" She asked.
"Well," Said Nathan hesitantly, aware that he was treading on thing ice. "My dad has always been this way, ever since I was really little. I'm told that he wasn't always like this, though, that he was once a great guy and everything."
Haley raised her eyebrows. "When?"
"Before Lucas was born. When that happened, I guess the world just stopped for him and he became this psycho person. I dunno. It just makes me wonder what would have happened if Lucas hadn't been born...there wouldn't be all of these problems, I guess."
Haley was suddenly cold, stiff in Nathan's warm embrace.
"What?" He asked her.
"That's a terrible thing to say. You don't mean that. You know that Lucas has nothing to do with your parent's divorce?" Her eyes were pleading, giving him the chance to take back what he said.
Nathan shook his head. There was so much bottled up inside him, so make rage and confusion about his parents, that he didn't really know what the reason was anymore. He clenched and unclenched his hands, searching the floor for answers with his eyes. "I think that things would have been simpler," He shrugged. He knew that she cared for Lucas, but he didn't really care at the moment. The pain was too great.
Haley untwined herself from his arms and went over to the counter where her coffee was sitting.
"Hales?"
"I can't believe you're blaming your problems on Lucas, Nathan. This has absolutely nothing to do with him. You're just reaching for answers that aren't there...you're wrong."
Nathan bristled. "I forgot," He said, his tone suddenly colder. "You have to defend him. You love him."
Haley stared at Nathan. "Lucas is like my brother." She said simply.
"Yeah, well, Lucas IS my brother and I don't enjoy a damn minute of it!" He said, his voice rising. "But maybe you like having him around...maybe you like him as MORE than a brother..."
Haley rolled her eyes. "Nathan, you're crazy."
"Am I?" He seethed. "You've always stuck up for him. ALWAYS. Even against me. You're BOYFRIEND. The guy you said you loved, remember? Don't I mean anything? I'm so sick of Lucas being this perfect person in your head, while I am just some poor rich kid with a messed up family."
"Nathan!" Haley said, the coffee halfway to her lips again, her mouth open in shock. "How could you think that? That's not how I see you...OR Lucas. Is that why you are blaming all of this stuff on him? Because you think I think he's better than you or something? Are you jealous?"
"Of WHAT?" He looked outraged. "Of the fact that my girlfriend thinks he's some sort of GOD while I appear to be some messed up kid with a bunch of problems? Yeah, I guess you could say that. I'm just wondering why you are with me and not with him."
"Because I love you," Haley said quietly, tears appearing in her eyes. "I love you, Nathan. Not Lucas. Not the thought of Lucas. You."
Nathan said nothing.
"If I loved Lucas, would I have told you that I loved you? Would I be with you at all right now? His sworn enemy?" She stood and went up to him, and looked him in the eye, with an attempt at a teasing smile. He looked away. "Nathan, I love you because you're you. The fact that you're family is messed up doesn't bother me. The fact that you think that it does bother me, bothers me. You know me." Her eyes pleaded with him but he refused to look at her.
Haley sighed and picked up her jacket, tears racing down her cheeks. "Your decisions are what's causing problems right now, Nathan." She opened her mouth again, ready to say something more, but closed it and shook her head, thinking better of it, and slipped out of the door and into the night.
END OF FLASHBACK
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Like it? LOVE it? (yea!) haha well there's this fabulous little review thing you can do to let me know (you know, they don't put them on here for nothing!)
If you don't want me to continue, please by all means don't review! Tehe okay NOW I'm done.
NEXT TIME on Protecting her always: The secret is shared with Peyton...how will she react? Haley comes face to face with Nathan for the first time since she found out.