AN: Okay so for those of you who didn't read my other story yet, I have
been out of town this past weekend without access to a computer, I
apologize profusely. I really liked this chapter, it's written kind of
differently, but I like it.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything really...well, except for this new purse I just bought...sorry has nothing to do with the story...just keep reading.
Description: You learn who the REAL father is (you have to figure it out, but the clues are there, be patient,) and Peyton comes to talk to Lucas.
Enjoy.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
For the next few weeks, Haley saw Nathan everywhere. She saw him in the hallways, of course, but then he started appearing in other places, like the pages of her notebook when she was supposed to be studying. The damn coffee pots all seemed to reflect his smile when she was trying to clean them. The dark windows of the downtown shops also held his expression of removed indifference that she had been seeing on his face every time they were within shouting distance.
Haley was getting lonely.
The days dragged out long before her, endless cycles of work and school, and doctors appointments. She couldn't look at the piano at Karen's café anymore, it sent her into a starry trance of remorse and regret.
God she missed him.
But she didn't see how she could forgive him. And even if she did, how could she expect him to forgive her for having his brother's child? It didn't seem feasible. And yet every time they came close, she wanted to reach out and hold his hand, tickle his neck with her butterfly kisses once more, feel his hand on her back...
But she would simply look down at the ground, pretending she didn't feel his stare. She couldn't be any more miserable.
To top it all off, she was starting with the morning sickness. She hadn't really had it much at first, only a few times or so. But no luck with that lasting. A few weeks into the pregnancy, and she was full blown every morning, sometimes during the night, and occasionally on pizza day in the cafeteria.
Karen had gotten as much ginger ale as she could afford, claiming that it helped with the morning sickness. Karen had been such a help to Haley, she felt a deep gratitude towards her. Karen seemed to empathize with her more than anything, and Haley found her to be a steady rock throughout this confusing storm. And it still was, evermore, confusing.
Not that she would ever tell Lucas, but she was not happy. Well, who would be? But the truth was, she had always pictured having her first child. With the man she loved, after she was married and had a nice house and a good job. A future. Now all it seemed she had was her and her baby.
And Lucas. He would always be there, she knew. But besides the little episode in his bedroom, she had never felt anything like that for Lucas. And she was pretty sure she didn't want to. And that he didn't want to.
Haley stepped up to her locker, struggling to hold her book bag and purse while fiddling with the combination, ignoring the people all around her. She had felt a sudden increase in whisperings, and wondered whether she was just paranoid, or if they were all talking about her. She managed to open the locker while holding her pen in her mouth, and promptly dropped it when she saw what was inside.
A single white rose.
Her heart seemed to lift off the ground and she felt like she was melting into the floor like sappy goo. It was from...
She opened the card and inside was a neatly typed note:
It's only the rarest and most beautiful of flowers that can bloom in the windiest of seasons.
~Lucas
Haley felt a stab of disappointment that it wasn't from Nathan. She shook her head and picked up her stuff with difficulty. This baby thing was so damn hard. She tried to feel grateful. And she did successfully for a moment, closing her eyes and reminding herself that she has a best friend that loves her. She let her breath deepen and for a moment a sweet smile came to her lips, a genuine small gesture that filled her with unexpected warmth.
But a moment later she felt a tear slide discretely down her cheek, as she let her unkempt hair fall into her face.
She didn't feel quite as beautiful as a flower.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Lucas let the sun's dying rays wash over him as he sat, immobile, at the kitchen table. His exterior was cool, all that moved at all was the corner of his mouth. It twitched up and down regularly, thoughts no doubt flashing through his mind.
The house calm and peaceful around him, it's warm tones giving him comfort for the mistakes he might have made. Even now he wasn't so sure. Every fiber in his being was telling him that he should have chose differently. But his heart was telling him something else.
He really did love her.
FLASHBACK: Tim's party - continued (Lucas remembers this, not Haley)
Lucas's heartbeat was erratic as Haley trailed kisses up his neck. They had only really been fooling around, Haley giggling occasionally. Lucas smiled at her warm brown eyes. Haley's hair was messy around her face, and Lucas brushed it back behind her ears. She stopped for a second, her eyes sobering for just a moment. She looked confused.
"You always have taken care of me, haven't you Luke?" Lucas couldn't control his mind long enough to come up with a good reply to this, so he just stared at her, the both of them breathing heavily. Haley's eyes were filling with tears. "Please, Lucas, take care of me now. I want to forget, I just want to forget..."
He didn't really know if she was making sense now, but his mind was still racing and he tried to slow it down. Memories and feelings washed over him and he suddenly tensed. Haley was right. He had always taken care of her, and now was not the time to stop. He held Haley tight just then, before they went any further, realizing that she might regret doing anything when she woke up sober tomorrow morning.
He didn't want to jeopardize her happiness. Or what was left of it, after Nathan had gotten through with her. Lucas clenched his teeth. Just the thought of Nathan made him want to hurl something across the room. But since the only thing within reaching distance was Haley, he held to her steadfast against his storm of emotions.
Never had he seen her like this. So alive, so bare, so vulnerable. Sweet, smart, lovely Haley. Here, drunk off her ass, sobbing uncontrollably, her shirt lying on the floor and her pants somewhere under the covers. She looked like a small child. Or a confused, grown woman. Even now he couldn't decide.
She sobbed silently into his shoulder, and he didn't say anything else. He rubbed her back for her and that calmed her down a bit. Reluctantly he stopped her kisses and held her gently in his arms, stroking her hair.
She fell asleep like that, and Lucas watched her. He didn't sleep at all himself, he just watched her lay peacefully, wondering what exactly they had been thinking, crossing the friendship line and heading into a dangerous, confusing territory. Did he regret it?
He already missed the simplicity.
After two hours of contemplation, he decided on not saying anything about their night together. He really didn't think she would remember it anyways, not if he left now. She looked troubled, even in her sleep, and Lucas couldn't imagine bringing any more pain to those lovely features.
His heart heavy, he dressed quietly and tucked Haley into the bed, and then turned to leave. He locked the door from the inside and then pulled it shut, to assure himself that no one would come in to bother her. He felt guilty for just leaving her, but he knew that it would hurt her even more if she had woken up next to her best friend.
But still, as he slipped out the door, he cursed himself, even though he knew he was making the right choice. Even so, he knew nothing would ever be the same.
END OF FLASHBACK
There was a knock at the door that startled his silence and sent him into almost knocking the vase holding drooping daisies onto the yellow tiles with a crash. But the flowers were saved, and every look of regret or feeling at all but pleasantness was wiped from his face as he went to answer the door.
He was expecting the mailman, maybe, or else the little girl down the street who often tried to sell them Girl Scout cookies. But as he opened the door, prepared to turn down the eager face standing on the other side, his mind went blank.
She was wearing somewhat of a hopeful expression, with just a bare hint of tears in her eyes as she surveyed him for what seemed like the first time in months, although it had been mere weeks since their encounter at the garage. And days since he had last avoided her gaze in the hallways.
"Can I come in?" She broke the silent stares with a light question. She was biting her lip. Lucas started, sure for a moment that she wasn't really there.
"Yeah, come on in."
They sat at the kitchen table, Peyton fingering the drooping daisies, Lucas watching her silently, shame and guilt and pride washing over him.
"So what's up?" He asked her finally.
"I know." She said quietly. Her tone wasn't angry, or confused. Just simple.
This confused him for a moment, as it did not quite fit his question. Then he raised his eyebrows, and he understood. He looked down at his rough hands. She watched them too, wondering what he was thinking...wondering if she would ever hold those hands again in her own.
"How?"
Peyton smiled and stood from the table. She went to sit in his lap, and he accepted her graciously, convinced that it was a dream and that at any second he would wake up, and be back in his nightmare.
"I can feel it. Besides, the look on your face told me everything I needed to know. I can't believe you did that." There was a silent understanding between the two suddenly, and Lucas smiled ruefully. He couldn't believe that someone would know him that well.
"She means a lot to me." He told her. Peyton raised her eyebrows. Lucas traced a finger down her temple with complete ease and sincerity, as if he had done it a million times before. All traces of doubt were eased from her mind with his touch. He cupped her face with his hands and kissed her gently.
She answered with a more passionate kiss, one that rendered them both breathless.
"...I'd better go." She said. She made no move to get up. Lucas smiled. She kissed him again. It was a wild, first lover kind of kiss, filled with sweet understanding and such a deep connection that only they understood.
"You'd better go," Said a breathless Lucas, his cool blue eyes still boring into hers, revealing an incredibly honest and rare emotion that Peyton couldn't quite place. She shivered as he lightly traced a finger down her spine. She was breathing heavily too, but not from the kissing. She had missed him so much...she searched his face, trying to memorize every part of it.
She kissed each of his eyelids and his nose, and his cheeks. She brushed his lips with a butterfly-light kiss, and then moved down his neck, memorizing every bit of him as she went.
His hand went to gentle circles on her back. He moaned with delight as she moved down his neck with a trail of butterfly kisses. She took his free hand in her own as she stopped, and looked into his eyes. She intertwined their fingers and kissed his hand.
"I want this," She whispered. Her eyes wouldn't leave his blue ones...they stared at her with such meaning that she couldn't take her eyes away from them. "No matter how long it takes..."
Lucas looked down, the moment both shattered and illuminated. The reality came crashing back into him, hitting him with the cold, hard facts. He was going to be the father of his best friend's baby. A baby that was undoubtedly not his. They fell into a heavy silence, full of meaning, but neither willing to address it.
He looked at Peyton as though he would never see her again and reluctantly let her slide off his lap, and out the door. He watched her through the window as she made her way to her car, her blonde curls swirling in the wind behind her, the sunset gracing her figure with deep tones of a velvety blue and red.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
So now you know....LUCAS IS NOT THE FATHER. Does that mean it's Nathan's? Or did someone else get to her? Hehehe. Either way, Peyton and Lucas have made up, although neither is quite sure where they stand. Where does this leave Haley? Will Lucas tell her he's not the father? Will he tell Nathan?
Guess you'd better review if you want to find out.
Disclaimer: I don't own anything really...well, except for this new purse I just bought...sorry has nothing to do with the story...just keep reading.
Description: You learn who the REAL father is (you have to figure it out, but the clues are there, be patient,) and Peyton comes to talk to Lucas.
Enjoy.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
For the next few weeks, Haley saw Nathan everywhere. She saw him in the hallways, of course, but then he started appearing in other places, like the pages of her notebook when she was supposed to be studying. The damn coffee pots all seemed to reflect his smile when she was trying to clean them. The dark windows of the downtown shops also held his expression of removed indifference that she had been seeing on his face every time they were within shouting distance.
Haley was getting lonely.
The days dragged out long before her, endless cycles of work and school, and doctors appointments. She couldn't look at the piano at Karen's café anymore, it sent her into a starry trance of remorse and regret.
God she missed him.
But she didn't see how she could forgive him. And even if she did, how could she expect him to forgive her for having his brother's child? It didn't seem feasible. And yet every time they came close, she wanted to reach out and hold his hand, tickle his neck with her butterfly kisses once more, feel his hand on her back...
But she would simply look down at the ground, pretending she didn't feel his stare. She couldn't be any more miserable.
To top it all off, she was starting with the morning sickness. She hadn't really had it much at first, only a few times or so. But no luck with that lasting. A few weeks into the pregnancy, and she was full blown every morning, sometimes during the night, and occasionally on pizza day in the cafeteria.
Karen had gotten as much ginger ale as she could afford, claiming that it helped with the morning sickness. Karen had been such a help to Haley, she felt a deep gratitude towards her. Karen seemed to empathize with her more than anything, and Haley found her to be a steady rock throughout this confusing storm. And it still was, evermore, confusing.
Not that she would ever tell Lucas, but she was not happy. Well, who would be? But the truth was, she had always pictured having her first child. With the man she loved, after she was married and had a nice house and a good job. A future. Now all it seemed she had was her and her baby.
And Lucas. He would always be there, she knew. But besides the little episode in his bedroom, she had never felt anything like that for Lucas. And she was pretty sure she didn't want to. And that he didn't want to.
Haley stepped up to her locker, struggling to hold her book bag and purse while fiddling with the combination, ignoring the people all around her. She had felt a sudden increase in whisperings, and wondered whether she was just paranoid, or if they were all talking about her. She managed to open the locker while holding her pen in her mouth, and promptly dropped it when she saw what was inside.
A single white rose.
Her heart seemed to lift off the ground and she felt like she was melting into the floor like sappy goo. It was from...
She opened the card and inside was a neatly typed note:
It's only the rarest and most beautiful of flowers that can bloom in the windiest of seasons.
~Lucas
Haley felt a stab of disappointment that it wasn't from Nathan. She shook her head and picked up her stuff with difficulty. This baby thing was so damn hard. She tried to feel grateful. And she did successfully for a moment, closing her eyes and reminding herself that she has a best friend that loves her. She let her breath deepen and for a moment a sweet smile came to her lips, a genuine small gesture that filled her with unexpected warmth.
But a moment later she felt a tear slide discretely down her cheek, as she let her unkempt hair fall into her face.
She didn't feel quite as beautiful as a flower.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Lucas let the sun's dying rays wash over him as he sat, immobile, at the kitchen table. His exterior was cool, all that moved at all was the corner of his mouth. It twitched up and down regularly, thoughts no doubt flashing through his mind.
The house calm and peaceful around him, it's warm tones giving him comfort for the mistakes he might have made. Even now he wasn't so sure. Every fiber in his being was telling him that he should have chose differently. But his heart was telling him something else.
He really did love her.
FLASHBACK: Tim's party - continued (Lucas remembers this, not Haley)
Lucas's heartbeat was erratic as Haley trailed kisses up his neck. They had only really been fooling around, Haley giggling occasionally. Lucas smiled at her warm brown eyes. Haley's hair was messy around her face, and Lucas brushed it back behind her ears. She stopped for a second, her eyes sobering for just a moment. She looked confused.
"You always have taken care of me, haven't you Luke?" Lucas couldn't control his mind long enough to come up with a good reply to this, so he just stared at her, the both of them breathing heavily. Haley's eyes were filling with tears. "Please, Lucas, take care of me now. I want to forget, I just want to forget..."
He didn't really know if she was making sense now, but his mind was still racing and he tried to slow it down. Memories and feelings washed over him and he suddenly tensed. Haley was right. He had always taken care of her, and now was not the time to stop. He held Haley tight just then, before they went any further, realizing that she might regret doing anything when she woke up sober tomorrow morning.
He didn't want to jeopardize her happiness. Or what was left of it, after Nathan had gotten through with her. Lucas clenched his teeth. Just the thought of Nathan made him want to hurl something across the room. But since the only thing within reaching distance was Haley, he held to her steadfast against his storm of emotions.
Never had he seen her like this. So alive, so bare, so vulnerable. Sweet, smart, lovely Haley. Here, drunk off her ass, sobbing uncontrollably, her shirt lying on the floor and her pants somewhere under the covers. She looked like a small child. Or a confused, grown woman. Even now he couldn't decide.
She sobbed silently into his shoulder, and he didn't say anything else. He rubbed her back for her and that calmed her down a bit. Reluctantly he stopped her kisses and held her gently in his arms, stroking her hair.
She fell asleep like that, and Lucas watched her. He didn't sleep at all himself, he just watched her lay peacefully, wondering what exactly they had been thinking, crossing the friendship line and heading into a dangerous, confusing territory. Did he regret it?
He already missed the simplicity.
After two hours of contemplation, he decided on not saying anything about their night together. He really didn't think she would remember it anyways, not if he left now. She looked troubled, even in her sleep, and Lucas couldn't imagine bringing any more pain to those lovely features.
His heart heavy, he dressed quietly and tucked Haley into the bed, and then turned to leave. He locked the door from the inside and then pulled it shut, to assure himself that no one would come in to bother her. He felt guilty for just leaving her, but he knew that it would hurt her even more if she had woken up next to her best friend.
But still, as he slipped out the door, he cursed himself, even though he knew he was making the right choice. Even so, he knew nothing would ever be the same.
END OF FLASHBACK
There was a knock at the door that startled his silence and sent him into almost knocking the vase holding drooping daisies onto the yellow tiles with a crash. But the flowers were saved, and every look of regret or feeling at all but pleasantness was wiped from his face as he went to answer the door.
He was expecting the mailman, maybe, or else the little girl down the street who often tried to sell them Girl Scout cookies. But as he opened the door, prepared to turn down the eager face standing on the other side, his mind went blank.
She was wearing somewhat of a hopeful expression, with just a bare hint of tears in her eyes as she surveyed him for what seemed like the first time in months, although it had been mere weeks since their encounter at the garage. And days since he had last avoided her gaze in the hallways.
"Can I come in?" She broke the silent stares with a light question. She was biting her lip. Lucas started, sure for a moment that she wasn't really there.
"Yeah, come on in."
They sat at the kitchen table, Peyton fingering the drooping daisies, Lucas watching her silently, shame and guilt and pride washing over him.
"So what's up?" He asked her finally.
"I know." She said quietly. Her tone wasn't angry, or confused. Just simple.
This confused him for a moment, as it did not quite fit his question. Then he raised his eyebrows, and he understood. He looked down at his rough hands. She watched them too, wondering what he was thinking...wondering if she would ever hold those hands again in her own.
"How?"
Peyton smiled and stood from the table. She went to sit in his lap, and he accepted her graciously, convinced that it was a dream and that at any second he would wake up, and be back in his nightmare.
"I can feel it. Besides, the look on your face told me everything I needed to know. I can't believe you did that." There was a silent understanding between the two suddenly, and Lucas smiled ruefully. He couldn't believe that someone would know him that well.
"She means a lot to me." He told her. Peyton raised her eyebrows. Lucas traced a finger down her temple with complete ease and sincerity, as if he had done it a million times before. All traces of doubt were eased from her mind with his touch. He cupped her face with his hands and kissed her gently.
She answered with a more passionate kiss, one that rendered them both breathless.
"...I'd better go." She said. She made no move to get up. Lucas smiled. She kissed him again. It was a wild, first lover kind of kiss, filled with sweet understanding and such a deep connection that only they understood.
"You'd better go," Said a breathless Lucas, his cool blue eyes still boring into hers, revealing an incredibly honest and rare emotion that Peyton couldn't quite place. She shivered as he lightly traced a finger down her spine. She was breathing heavily too, but not from the kissing. She had missed him so much...she searched his face, trying to memorize every part of it.
She kissed each of his eyelids and his nose, and his cheeks. She brushed his lips with a butterfly-light kiss, and then moved down his neck, memorizing every bit of him as she went.
His hand went to gentle circles on her back. He moaned with delight as she moved down his neck with a trail of butterfly kisses. She took his free hand in her own as she stopped, and looked into his eyes. She intertwined their fingers and kissed his hand.
"I want this," She whispered. Her eyes wouldn't leave his blue ones...they stared at her with such meaning that she couldn't take her eyes away from them. "No matter how long it takes..."
Lucas looked down, the moment both shattered and illuminated. The reality came crashing back into him, hitting him with the cold, hard facts. He was going to be the father of his best friend's baby. A baby that was undoubtedly not his. They fell into a heavy silence, full of meaning, but neither willing to address it.
He looked at Peyton as though he would never see her again and reluctantly let her slide off his lap, and out the door. He watched her through the window as she made her way to her car, her blonde curls swirling in the wind behind her, the sunset gracing her figure with deep tones of a velvety blue and red.
~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
So now you know....LUCAS IS NOT THE FATHER. Does that mean it's Nathan's? Or did someone else get to her? Hehehe. Either way, Peyton and Lucas have made up, although neither is quite sure where they stand. Where does this leave Haley? Will Lucas tell her he's not the father? Will he tell Nathan?
Guess you'd better review if you want to find out.