Title - Come Home
Author name - Carol
E-mail -
Rating - G
Spoilers - none
Disclaimer – What do these two statements have in common....."Have you ever danced with the devil in the pale moon light?" and "Do you own JAG?"- Alex Trebek "What is no, Alex?" - Carol
Summary – Wishing for someone to be home
Authors Note's –
1. Kleenex Warning ahead, but in a good way. And if you don't need it then I just guess I'm overemotional right now. Blame the insomnia.
2. Borrowing "Come Home Soon" by SheDaisy.
3. Once again give it up to the MSWOA Kitty for the beta-read.
August 18
Rabb Residence
9:05 PM
"Mommy, when's Daddy coming home?" Andrew asked before he placed his sleepy head on his pillow.
"Soon, Little Man," Mac responded to her four-year-old son. "You brushed your teeth?"
Andrew shook his head and showed his mother his clean white teeth. "See."
Mac chuckled. "Very good. Did you say your blessings?"
"Can Danielle say them with me?"
"Danielle's already asleep. We stayed up late tonight. Maybe tomorrow night."
"Okay." Andrew got out of his bed and kneeled on the floor. He looked up at his ceiling and pretended to be looking a heaven. "God bless Mommy, Daddy, Danielle, Thomas and everyone else. Thanks for the moon and the stars, too. Oh and could you please bring my Daddy home, I miss him lots." He smiled as if he heard God's answer in the air. "Thanks and amen."
"Amen," Mac echoed as Andrew climbed back in his bed and under the covers. "I love you."
"I love you, too." Andrew gave his mother a kiss and hugged her as she leaned over him.
Mac smiled down at his angelic face and walked to the door. "Sweet dreams," she softly whispered as Andrew watched her leave the room.
Mac left the door halfway open and crossed the hall to Danielle's room. The toddler was fast asleep in her bed. She was just like her father with the blanket already kicked off. Mac chuckled and pulled the blanket up to Danielle's chin. She kissed her soft cheek and left the room, again leaving the door halfway open.
She stood in the hallway for a minute and remembered the night Harm left, the two of them checked on the kids before they went off to bed. However, there wasn't much they could do once they went to bed. Mac was one week away from delivering their third child. The tiny three-week old baby who now slept in the nursery and had only seen his father in pictures.
She slowly crept into the nursery and watched Thomas as he sleep. A tear fell down cheek as she caught a glimpse of the teddy bear Harm sent from Italy the day Thomas was born. He had been called over to Naples to give a lecture at a conference and ended up stationed aboard the Seahawk. Their JAG fell down a flight of stairs and since Harm was in the area he was ordered there until the replacement could arrive. A month had past and they were still waiting on the replacement.
Thomas let out a soft whimper, as if he could feel his mother's sadness. Mac looked down at him and smiled. "It's okay, Baby." She ran her fingers over his soft brown hair and slowly walked out of the room.
I put away the groceries
And I take my daily bread
I dream of your arms around me
As I tuck the kids in bed
She walked into the master bedroom and looked around the room. In the center of the room was the bed where she and Harm made their three children. It held the many nights he would hold her and tell her how much he loved her. On the nightstand proudly stood their wedding picture and pictures of the kids, their family.
This room was filled with love. On the weekends Andrew and Danielle would jump on the bed to wake them. Sunday mornings were her favorite; Harm and Andrew would make breakfast for all of them. They would eat cereal in their bed and read the paper together.
Mac looked at the small table next to the overstuffed chair in the room. The table held a lamp and the books she and Harm were reading. Across the arm of the chair was one of Harm's zipper sweatshirts. This sweatshirt had become a long standing argument between them. Mac had acquired it when they were just friend and Harm had been trying to claim it back since they got engaged. Mac smiled as she slipped it on, it reminded her that she was still winning the argument.
She picked up the baby monitor and walked out of the room and down the stairs. She locked the front door and checked the kitchen to make sure everything was turned off. She stopped as she stood by the map of the world that was tapped to the wall. Her fingers crossed over the pushpins that were placed in Europe and the Persian Gulf area. Everyday Harm e-mailed the kids to tell them where he was and Mac would place a pushpin so the kids could see where Daddy was.
"Come home," Mac said as she gazed at yesterday's pushpin. For some reason there wasn't an e-mail this morning.
She wrapped her arms around herself and stepped out onto the deck from the glass doors of the kitchen. She leaned against the railing and looked up at the bright moon and stars in the sky.
I don't know what you're doin'
And I don't know where you are
But I look up at that great big sky
And I hope you're wishin' on that same bright star
I wonder, I pray
She placed the baby monitor on the railing and walked into the backyard. The moist grass felt cold against her bare feet and made her skin shiver as she walked through it. She thought back to the sleepless nights of when Andrew was a baby and she and Harm would dance in the backyard. She would be holding the restless baby to her chest and Harm held her against his chest and softly hummed a song to the both of them. Eventually Andrew would fall asleep, but they would continue to dance.
And I sleep alone
I cry alone
And it's so hard livin' here on my own
So please, come home soon
(Come home soon)
Her hand worked its way to the necklace she wore. Her fingers enclosed the charmed penny; their lucky penny. Her eyes closed tightly and she felt closer to Harm. He had told her it was his lucky penny and that it was always with him. She once asked him what made it so lucky and he grinned, "It was with me when I asked you out on our first official date, the day we got engaged, and it will be with me when we get married." And it was.
Before he left for the conference he had the penny encased in a gold charm holder and gave it to Mac to hold on to for him. He was worried he wouldn't be home for the birth of the baby, but at least the penny would be there. It was there for the birth of Andrew and Danielle. There was no reason for this birth to be any different.
The penny pressed against her heart and hand, but it didn't replace her husband. It wasn't something she could hold on to. It wasn't him.
I know that we're together
Even though we're far apart
And I'll wear our lucky penny 'round my neck
Pressed to my heart
I wonder, I pray
As every night since his departure Mac stood in the backyard under the star wishing Harm was home. Wishing and praying he was safe. Wishing he was lying in their bed waiting for her to finish tucking the kids into bed. Her eyes opened on the brightest star in sky.
"That one right there," Mac repeated Harm's words from so long ago. "That one is ours. Whenever we're apart look up and I'll be looking at it, too."
She stared up at the star and felt closer to him. It warmed her heart, but didn't reach her soul. Her soul was across the world in Harm's heart.
The tears rolled freely down her cheeks. She refused to cry in the house; scared the kids would see her and worry. But after tuck-in she would cry in the backyard.
And I sleep alone
I cry alone
And it's so hard livin' here on my own
So please, come home soon
(Come home soon)
She would also remember. Remember his touch as they played with Andrew and Danielle in the backyard. The games of tag and water-war. The feeling of the four of them in the hammock holding each other. After tuck-in the two of them would lie in the hammock and lay there. Harm would talk to her belly and she would stroke his hair. Or Harm would kiss her neck and tell her how beautiful she looked, even if she was wearing his sweatshirt.
It had been five years since they said 'I do' and she could still remember their first kiss as man and wife. It was burned on her lips and heart, just like all of Harm's kisses. Her heart raced every time she thought about being with him. Being held by him after they made love was sometimes more wonderful than the act of making love. His eyes would look into hers and she could feel everything about it.
"I miss you," she whispered to the crickets and birds of the twilight.
I still imagine your touch
It's beautiful missing something that much
But sometimes love needs a fighting chance
So I'll wait my turn until it's our turn to dance
I wonder, I pray
I sleep alone
I cry alone
Without you this house is not a home
So please, come home soon
Her hands ran across the rough texture of the hammock and her toes stretched into the soft grass. A smiled crossed her face as she recalled Danielle doing the same thing this afternoon as she and Andrew played in the yard. The two played a game of water tag and tried to convince Mac they needed a dog. She just laughed and said they would discuss it once their father got home. According to Andrew that was as good as a yes.
Mac turned around and looked up at the house. The lights from the kitchen showed off the deck with its furniture and the grill off to the side. She looked up onto the second floor where the windows could be made out of the different rooms. The windows to the master bedroom were her favorite. Etched glass with the rose colored curtains behind them.
She looked back down to the glass doors which lead onto the deck. The little flag which hung on the glass reminded her of their sacrifice. There was another one placed in the front window. It let everyone know there was a serviceman serving their country. Andrew hung the one on the glass door stating, "The backyard neighbors should know about Daddy, too."
Her worst fear was that of all wives. That he wouldn't come home. That she would get the phone call and she would be alone. Their children would never know their father. She closed her eyes and prayed he was safe and sound.
I walk alone
I try alone
I'll wait for you, don't want to die alone
So please, come home soon
She lifted her closed eyes to heaven and gave another plea. "Bring him home."
She lowered her head and opened her eyes. She started to walk back towards the house, when a figure standing next to the deck railing caught her attention. Her heart stopped in her chest as she looked at it. She closed her eyes again, not believing them. She reopened them and the figure moved away from the deck and walked towards her.
They met halfway in the middle of the backyard. Mac placed her hand on Harm's cheek and stared up into his eyes. Her voice had left her and tears freely fell down her cheeks. Harm grasped her hand and held onto it as the heat from her hand penetrated his skin and moved directly into his heart.
Her other hand moved on to his other cheek and Harm smiled at her shock and surprise. He tried to say something, but he couldn't. He stood in awe of her as she did him. There was only one thing he could do. He leaned down and kissed her lips. They tasted as they did the day he left.
Slowly their arms wrapped around each other as they fell into their kiss. As the kiss broke Mac pulled herself as close as she could to Harm. He lifted her off of the ground and held her. He held her as he had in his dreams, close and unyielding, nothing would break them apart.
Come home soon
Come home soon
He set her back down on her feet and looked into her tear soaked eyes. He read love, desire, happiness, and a hint of confusion in them. Mac opened her mouth to say something, but Harm placed a finger over her soft lips. He gazed into her some more and said the only words he could think of.
"I'm home."
THE END