Satoshi had no idea why he was here. It had been out of his hands,
actually. He had been transported along whatever had grabbed Daisuke, depositing
them both in this strange realm. His cursed heritage and inheritance, he
thought. Even now, when he had been free of it all, it still clung to him
like a bad taste.
His eyes found the frozen, painfully stretched out form of his past horror and nightmare.
The other half of Dark. The other half of the Black Wings. Everything he had hated so much. Everything he had tried to stop.
Krad had always been his fear, his nightmare, the beast that lurked inside him, that tore him apart. The curse of his blood. He had been used by this creature, used and abused, forced to follow a path he had hated. He had hurt his friend, had tried to kill him in the form of Krad.
Daisuke had forgiven him, had wanted to be his friend, had saved him. Time and again. Both boys had broken the vicious cycle of family feuds and hatred, had forged a bond not even Krad's insanity and Satoshi's stepfather had been able to break. Maybe it was even thanks to this struggle that Satoshi had found someone to live for, to love.
Dai had asked more from him than to give his life… he had forced him live. He had been the first, the very first person, to ever demand him to live. Daisuke had accepted him without questions, had always been there for him, had been his best friend. He had a future with his lover, he had plans, he had had so much… Now he was facing his past again. He was looking at his nightmare.
Just that Krad was no longer such a nightmarish apparition. He was still angelic outside, a demon on the inside. Blond hair, golden eyes that weren't human, white wings… all the good looks of an angel. But the temper, the drive and the intentions of a devil. Ruthless, brutal, deadly… The negative side of Dark. The antithesis. All the evil in the world condensed in this beautiful body.
Now he was just a weak shadow of his former self, strung up like sacrifice, pain etched into his features.
Satoshi had envied Daisuke his relationship with Dark. The two of them, despite their differences, had worked well together, had been a unit. They had learned to trust each other, while all he had felt for Krad was disgust and the fervent wish to get rid of him.
Now he witnessed the same trust and unity as Daisuke knelt beside his injured partner, touched him, initiated the bond that had been by blood once. Dark turned into blackness, then enveloped his host, absorbed himself into the human body. He was drawn to the Niwa bloodline unable to resist its call because of the physical contact, and finally became one.
Daisuke stiffened, cried out, then hunched over. Out of his back a pair of black wings exploded in a display of raw magic. Unlike before, his body went through very little changes. He was as tall as Dark now, just as lithe, and only his different hair color showed the change. Brown eyes became violet, the face slightly sharper. Those different eyes gazed up into the blackening sky, a dark smile gracing the new features.
The attack came out of nothing and Dark jumped out of the way, his wings spreading, taking him into the air.
The fight was on.
Satoshi briefly closed his eyes, then looked at Krad, whose gaze was following his mirror image's flight.
"Why are you here?" the demon finally asked, voice rough and shaky.
"I don't know."
"Is it because of him?"
Satoshi smirked a little. "He's my best friend. Not a concept you'd understand, I'm sure."
Krad's eyes slid shut for a moment and his features twitched in pain. "Your blood called you here because he called out to both of you. It's a trap," he said after a moment, voice strained.
"What is he?"
"I don't know." It was a softly-voiced confession. "Powerful… cold…" He gasped as his wings were suddenly bent at an angle that had to be painful. Krad cried out softly, unable to stop the sound of suffering.
Satoshi felt part of him writhe in pain at the sound. Whatever Krad was, he was also able to feel. Like Dark. Like them all. And he had been tortured just the same.
"Why set this trap? Why call us here?" he wanted to know, watching the fight with an almost clinical detachment. He analyzed the facts as coldly as he had done before, in his old life. It was so easy to slip back into that persona, even now that he was grown up.
"I don't know…"
"Well, whoever he is, he woke you from the seal. He brought you here. He somehow knew that Dark would awaken Daisuke's blood, would call him here…"
More pieces fell into place. More sense, more reason, more… hard and undeniable facts.
"He started hurting him immediately. No explanations," Krad's voice shook and lines of stress etched deeper into the smooth face. "Again and again and again…"
"He knew Daisuke would be unable to resist the merge, that they would fight. And they are strong." Dark eyes followed the battle that was evenly matched. "He knew. Why bring me here, then?"
Krad had no answer to that and Satoshi had no idea whether the demon was even able to answer him. He hung limply in the invisible bonds, his chest rising ever so slightly. A soft whimper suddenly escaped him and there was a dry cracking sound. One wing started to leak blood.
Satoshi couldn't remember seeing Krad ever bleed before. Those wings had been cut and torn off in the final fight. There had been no blood then. Magic didn't bleed. In here, though… they were real. Everything was real. Krad experienced pain from a true body, not just a magical form. Satoshi gazed at the injury, at the demon that had been so horrifying before. Now it was a broken puppet, strung up, the toy of a creature that had brought them all here for his entertainment.
The fight in the sky went on, neither side giving in, neither side gaining much. Dark was hit several times, but he was still moving fast, his magical strikes powerful. Daisuke was a strong host, had grown a lot. When he had been fourteen, drawing on his energy had drained the boy. Now, as a young man, he had a lot more resilience. Still, there was a limit.
Black and white, he thought. Darkness and light. One showed the wounds, the other only felt the pain. One fought, the other still suffered the aftershocks.
"Balance," Satoshi whispered. "It's about balance."
Golden eyes cracked open, gazing at him. They were glazed over, swimming with agony. Gone was the cool elegance of before, the aloofness, the neatness. This was a tortured creature.
"Dark and Daisuke are that balance. They are equals, partners… They are one. But Dark is a part of you." Satoshi looked at the creature. "You are his balance, whether either of you likes it or not."
Krad laughed weakly. "Maybe."
"You know it is so. You live and die together."
"We cannot die. We live eternally. We aren't bound by human time or law."
Satoshi smirked. "You can die, demon. You and Dark can be killed by the right means. You can stop to exist, return to the nothingness that gave birth to you. You can suffer, feel pain, and maybe he, whatever he is, can truly kill you." He turned fully to his nightmare. "You are one."
Krad looked at him, silent. Tremors were racing through his body.
"You are two sides of the same coin. You are in a balance that has been upset a long time ago. Humanity broke you apart, forced you to live separate lives. You could never let the other go, never find happiness, enjoy life. You were cursed, just like your hosts. And without you, he can't win in here either," Satoshi went on. It was as if the solution came to him as he spoke, eyes on the sky again. "Daisuke isn't enough. Dark isn't enough. Both can never be enough because half of each is missing. There's only darkness, no light."
A soft, harsh laugh drew his attention back to the trapped being. "It sounds like you want to free me, Satoshi."
He seriously regarded the creature. Krad's eyes widened in shock.
"You… do?"
He had never seen him so open, so vulnerable, so completely caught off guard and reeling – in body and in mind. Krad had always been cold, treating him as his possession, his toy. Now there was little of that left. Sure, it would return the moment he had a host, a Hikari host. Satoshi's memories were quite clear of the time he had physically and mentally suffered under the brutal onslaught of this particular demon. He had been close to ending his life, had neglected his own needs, just to stop him from killing Daisuke to get to Dark.
If he allowed him access again, he would have the same fate. He would suffer the pain, the humiliation, the abysmal loneliness. A cold voice in his mind, taunting him, abusing him, raping his soul… He would become a tool again.
'Life is not precious.'
Carelessly uttered words or the truth? At the time, when he had been ready to kill himself to stop Krad, he had been convinced. Daisuke had fought for him, had forced his own will to live onto the failing body and soul of his friend.
'You can't want yourself to die!'
Live…
Live with Krad? But what was the alternative? Die in here? Watch Daisuke and Dark die before the entity turned on him and Krad? Or merge with the demon and hand his life over to his mercy once more?
Satoshi closed his eyes, shivering a little. His stomach was a pit of ice, turning over and over, making him sick.
Was he really ready to let Krad in again after he had lived six years without him? Satoshi had gone to school like his friend, they had gone to university together, even though it was an old hat for the Hikari genius. Still, he had learned more than what a university taught. He had learned life. He had learned love.
Daisuke, he thought desperately.
But if he didn't act, his lover would die. It was a no win situation. He knew the key to winning, to maybe getting out of here.
Unlike for Daisuke, there had been no empty spot, no loneliness. The absence of Krad had meant life to him, friends and fun, a normal existence without a burden that had nearly killed him.
Was he really contemplating this?
A cry of pain had him whirl around and he witnessed Dark impacting with the ground, a lance of pure energy shooting at him. The kaitou brought up a shield, but it was weaker than it should be. He was losing…
Daisuke was losing.
They were losing.
He was running out of time.
He had to make a decision. Either they would die here, together, or they could have a faint chance of survival.
Satoshi met the golden eyes. Feline. Feral. Predatory. But also filled with pain and longing and need, all those emotions he had felt before. All of them directed at him. All scaring him like nothing else.
'You are my everything.'
He shivered.
"I hate you. I hate your existence and I curse my blood, my mother and every other Hikari in the blood line. I was free of you because of Dark. I could live because of Daisuke. No one else believed in me." His voice was steady. "I had six years to catch up on what I had lost in the sixteen years before. I'm not ready to die here, but our survival means my damnation."
Dark was off into the sky again, blasting at his enemy. Satoshi closed his eyes, inhaling deeply.
Daisuke…
"Maybe it's my destiny, my so-called fate, maybe I can never get rid of this curse. We can't win without the two of you. Dark alone will be killed otherwise, and with him Daisuke. You are what he needs… and what I despise."
He faced his demon, his nightmare and squared his shoulders. Golden eyes regarded him with an almost morbid fascination. Krad was unable to grasp what the young human was saying, staring at him like a hypnotized rabbit would at a striking cobra. A dangerous rabbit. A rabbit that could strike and kill, but at the moment he was manacled, chained…
"Six years were enough," Satoshi said, voice steady and belying the soul-deep fear he felt inside.
Six years hadn't been enough! a part of him cried. He was only twenty-two! He had a whole life ahead of him and he was throwing it away. He and Dai had had plans! So many plans…
'Live!' something screamed inside him.
But if he didn't make this step, he wouldn't get out of here, he would witness Dark and Daisuke's death…
"Satoshi…"
His name. He looked at Krad, saw the incredulous expression. For the first time he noticed the streaks of dirt on the formerly so smooth features. Shadows under his eyes, all the lines of pain and suffering… The predatory eyes of before were just golden orbs, the pupils round, wide, reflecting agony.
Satoshi had no illusions. As vulnerable and human the creature now was, the moment he was inside his body he would be back to the Krad he had hated and still did. Cold, sadistic, psychotic… everything Dark wasn't. Krad was the demon who had tried to take over Hikari Satoshi's body, purge him from his consciousness, the parasite.
"Last time I had no choice," he said softly. "I had to accept it. This time I'm making the choice." A wry smile flew over his thin lips. "I condemn myself."
Satoshi stretched out a hand and touched the spread-eagled form. It would hurt, he knew. Like all the other transformations when Krad had forced himself out of the boy's body, had torn it apart. He had experienced such pain in his young life, it had been enough for a life time. No broken bone or cut skin hurt as much as the physical takeover of Krad.
Now he would be a slave once more.
He was sealing his fate.
'I love you, Dai. Forgive me.'
His eyes found the frozen, painfully stretched out form of his past horror and nightmare.
The other half of Dark. The other half of the Black Wings. Everything he had hated so much. Everything he had tried to stop.
Krad had always been his fear, his nightmare, the beast that lurked inside him, that tore him apart. The curse of his blood. He had been used by this creature, used and abused, forced to follow a path he had hated. He had hurt his friend, had tried to kill him in the form of Krad.
Daisuke had forgiven him, had wanted to be his friend, had saved him. Time and again. Both boys had broken the vicious cycle of family feuds and hatred, had forged a bond not even Krad's insanity and Satoshi's stepfather had been able to break. Maybe it was even thanks to this struggle that Satoshi had found someone to live for, to love.
Dai had asked more from him than to give his life… he had forced him live. He had been the first, the very first person, to ever demand him to live. Daisuke had accepted him without questions, had always been there for him, had been his best friend. He had a future with his lover, he had plans, he had had so much… Now he was facing his past again. He was looking at his nightmare.
Just that Krad was no longer such a nightmarish apparition. He was still angelic outside, a demon on the inside. Blond hair, golden eyes that weren't human, white wings… all the good looks of an angel. But the temper, the drive and the intentions of a devil. Ruthless, brutal, deadly… The negative side of Dark. The antithesis. All the evil in the world condensed in this beautiful body.
Now he was just a weak shadow of his former self, strung up like sacrifice, pain etched into his features.
Satoshi had envied Daisuke his relationship with Dark. The two of them, despite their differences, had worked well together, had been a unit. They had learned to trust each other, while all he had felt for Krad was disgust and the fervent wish to get rid of him.
Now he witnessed the same trust and unity as Daisuke knelt beside his injured partner, touched him, initiated the bond that had been by blood once. Dark turned into blackness, then enveloped his host, absorbed himself into the human body. He was drawn to the Niwa bloodline unable to resist its call because of the physical contact, and finally became one.
Daisuke stiffened, cried out, then hunched over. Out of his back a pair of black wings exploded in a display of raw magic. Unlike before, his body went through very little changes. He was as tall as Dark now, just as lithe, and only his different hair color showed the change. Brown eyes became violet, the face slightly sharper. Those different eyes gazed up into the blackening sky, a dark smile gracing the new features.
The attack came out of nothing and Dark jumped out of the way, his wings spreading, taking him into the air.
The fight was on.
Satoshi briefly closed his eyes, then looked at Krad, whose gaze was following his mirror image's flight.
"Why are you here?" the demon finally asked, voice rough and shaky.
"I don't know."
"Is it because of him?"
Satoshi smirked a little. "He's my best friend. Not a concept you'd understand, I'm sure."
Krad's eyes slid shut for a moment and his features twitched in pain. "Your blood called you here because he called out to both of you. It's a trap," he said after a moment, voice strained.
"What is he?"
"I don't know." It was a softly-voiced confession. "Powerful… cold…" He gasped as his wings were suddenly bent at an angle that had to be painful. Krad cried out softly, unable to stop the sound of suffering.
Satoshi felt part of him writhe in pain at the sound. Whatever Krad was, he was also able to feel. Like Dark. Like them all. And he had been tortured just the same.
"Why set this trap? Why call us here?" he wanted to know, watching the fight with an almost clinical detachment. He analyzed the facts as coldly as he had done before, in his old life. It was so easy to slip back into that persona, even now that he was grown up.
"I don't know…"
"Well, whoever he is, he woke you from the seal. He brought you here. He somehow knew that Dark would awaken Daisuke's blood, would call him here…"
More pieces fell into place. More sense, more reason, more… hard and undeniable facts.
"He started hurting him immediately. No explanations," Krad's voice shook and lines of stress etched deeper into the smooth face. "Again and again and again…"
"He knew Daisuke would be unable to resist the merge, that they would fight. And they are strong." Dark eyes followed the battle that was evenly matched. "He knew. Why bring me here, then?"
Krad had no answer to that and Satoshi had no idea whether the demon was even able to answer him. He hung limply in the invisible bonds, his chest rising ever so slightly. A soft whimper suddenly escaped him and there was a dry cracking sound. One wing started to leak blood.
Satoshi couldn't remember seeing Krad ever bleed before. Those wings had been cut and torn off in the final fight. There had been no blood then. Magic didn't bleed. In here, though… they were real. Everything was real. Krad experienced pain from a true body, not just a magical form. Satoshi gazed at the injury, at the demon that had been so horrifying before. Now it was a broken puppet, strung up, the toy of a creature that had brought them all here for his entertainment.
The fight in the sky went on, neither side giving in, neither side gaining much. Dark was hit several times, but he was still moving fast, his magical strikes powerful. Daisuke was a strong host, had grown a lot. When he had been fourteen, drawing on his energy had drained the boy. Now, as a young man, he had a lot more resilience. Still, there was a limit.
Black and white, he thought. Darkness and light. One showed the wounds, the other only felt the pain. One fought, the other still suffered the aftershocks.
"Balance," Satoshi whispered. "It's about balance."
Golden eyes cracked open, gazing at him. They were glazed over, swimming with agony. Gone was the cool elegance of before, the aloofness, the neatness. This was a tortured creature.
"Dark and Daisuke are that balance. They are equals, partners… They are one. But Dark is a part of you." Satoshi looked at the creature. "You are his balance, whether either of you likes it or not."
Krad laughed weakly. "Maybe."
"You know it is so. You live and die together."
"We cannot die. We live eternally. We aren't bound by human time or law."
Satoshi smirked. "You can die, demon. You and Dark can be killed by the right means. You can stop to exist, return to the nothingness that gave birth to you. You can suffer, feel pain, and maybe he, whatever he is, can truly kill you." He turned fully to his nightmare. "You are one."
Krad looked at him, silent. Tremors were racing through his body.
"You are two sides of the same coin. You are in a balance that has been upset a long time ago. Humanity broke you apart, forced you to live separate lives. You could never let the other go, never find happiness, enjoy life. You were cursed, just like your hosts. And without you, he can't win in here either," Satoshi went on. It was as if the solution came to him as he spoke, eyes on the sky again. "Daisuke isn't enough. Dark isn't enough. Both can never be enough because half of each is missing. There's only darkness, no light."
A soft, harsh laugh drew his attention back to the trapped being. "It sounds like you want to free me, Satoshi."
He seriously regarded the creature. Krad's eyes widened in shock.
"You… do?"
He had never seen him so open, so vulnerable, so completely caught off guard and reeling – in body and in mind. Krad had always been cold, treating him as his possession, his toy. Now there was little of that left. Sure, it would return the moment he had a host, a Hikari host. Satoshi's memories were quite clear of the time he had physically and mentally suffered under the brutal onslaught of this particular demon. He had been close to ending his life, had neglected his own needs, just to stop him from killing Daisuke to get to Dark.
If he allowed him access again, he would have the same fate. He would suffer the pain, the humiliation, the abysmal loneliness. A cold voice in his mind, taunting him, abusing him, raping his soul… He would become a tool again.
'Life is not precious.'
Carelessly uttered words or the truth? At the time, when he had been ready to kill himself to stop Krad, he had been convinced. Daisuke had fought for him, had forced his own will to live onto the failing body and soul of his friend.
'You can't want yourself to die!'
Live…
Live with Krad? But what was the alternative? Die in here? Watch Daisuke and Dark die before the entity turned on him and Krad? Or merge with the demon and hand his life over to his mercy once more?
Satoshi closed his eyes, shivering a little. His stomach was a pit of ice, turning over and over, making him sick.
Was he really ready to let Krad in again after he had lived six years without him? Satoshi had gone to school like his friend, they had gone to university together, even though it was an old hat for the Hikari genius. Still, he had learned more than what a university taught. He had learned life. He had learned love.
Daisuke, he thought desperately.
But if he didn't act, his lover would die. It was a no win situation. He knew the key to winning, to maybe getting out of here.
Unlike for Daisuke, there had been no empty spot, no loneliness. The absence of Krad had meant life to him, friends and fun, a normal existence without a burden that had nearly killed him.
Was he really contemplating this?
A cry of pain had him whirl around and he witnessed Dark impacting with the ground, a lance of pure energy shooting at him. The kaitou brought up a shield, but it was weaker than it should be. He was losing…
Daisuke was losing.
They were losing.
He was running out of time.
He had to make a decision. Either they would die here, together, or they could have a faint chance of survival.
Satoshi met the golden eyes. Feline. Feral. Predatory. But also filled with pain and longing and need, all those emotions he had felt before. All of them directed at him. All scaring him like nothing else.
'You are my everything.'
He shivered.
"I hate you. I hate your existence and I curse my blood, my mother and every other Hikari in the blood line. I was free of you because of Dark. I could live because of Daisuke. No one else believed in me." His voice was steady. "I had six years to catch up on what I had lost in the sixteen years before. I'm not ready to die here, but our survival means my damnation."
Dark was off into the sky again, blasting at his enemy. Satoshi closed his eyes, inhaling deeply.
Daisuke…
"Maybe it's my destiny, my so-called fate, maybe I can never get rid of this curse. We can't win without the two of you. Dark alone will be killed otherwise, and with him Daisuke. You are what he needs… and what I despise."
He faced his demon, his nightmare and squared his shoulders. Golden eyes regarded him with an almost morbid fascination. Krad was unable to grasp what the young human was saying, staring at him like a hypnotized rabbit would at a striking cobra. A dangerous rabbit. A rabbit that could strike and kill, but at the moment he was manacled, chained…
"Six years were enough," Satoshi said, voice steady and belying the soul-deep fear he felt inside.
Six years hadn't been enough! a part of him cried. He was only twenty-two! He had a whole life ahead of him and he was throwing it away. He and Dai had had plans! So many plans…
'Live!' something screamed inside him.
But if he didn't make this step, he wouldn't get out of here, he would witness Dark and Daisuke's death…
"Satoshi…"
His name. He looked at Krad, saw the incredulous expression. For the first time he noticed the streaks of dirt on the formerly so smooth features. Shadows under his eyes, all the lines of pain and suffering… The predatory eyes of before were just golden orbs, the pupils round, wide, reflecting agony.
Satoshi had no illusions. As vulnerable and human the creature now was, the moment he was inside his body he would be back to the Krad he had hated and still did. Cold, sadistic, psychotic… everything Dark wasn't. Krad was the demon who had tried to take over Hikari Satoshi's body, purge him from his consciousness, the parasite.
"Last time I had no choice," he said softly. "I had to accept it. This time I'm making the choice." A wry smile flew over his thin lips. "I condemn myself."
Satoshi stretched out a hand and touched the spread-eagled form. It would hurt, he knew. Like all the other transformations when Krad had forced himself out of the boy's body, had torn it apart. He had experienced such pain in his young life, it had been enough for a life time. No broken bone or cut skin hurt as much as the physical takeover of Krad.
Now he would be a slave once more.
He was sealing his fate.
'I love you, Dai. Forgive me.'