Time out
Sara sighed as she leaned back against the upholstery of the Mustang and closed her eyes, glad to be out of the hospital at last. She was a lousy patient, she knew, and the last day she had been pretty hard to take. Even though Catherine had brought her books, journals, and DVDs, and every one of her CSIs had visited, spending time just sitting was incredibly draining for her. The nursing staff was probably very glad to see the last of her. Even though she was in more pain than she would ever admit, leaving the hospital was a relief.
The mid-morning sun felt good as they cruised, and Sara happily made plans to spend the afternoon on her deck, soaking it all in. If she had to be a lazy bum for the next few weeks, at least she could do it outdoors. She felt rather than saw Catherine's repeated glances her way as they drove, and finally she couldn't take it anymore. "What?" she asked, squinting one eye open.
"I've just been wondering where you got the car."
"Not my style, huh?" Sara replied, catching Catherine's sheepish look as she voiced what the older CSI had been thinking. She laughed and shifted up in the seat, trying to hide her wince of pain and knowing that Catherine caught everything. "My dad. My parents own a B&B outside the city." She considered saying something more about her parents, but her sometimes difficult relationship with them was not something she wanted to share. "I went out to see them when I got back and Dad took one look at my car and decided I needed some color." She shook her head in disbelief that her parents never ceased to amaze and infuriate her. "I think his exact words were, 'White is the color of death. You need some vibrancy in your life. It will help your life energy.' Next thing I knew, I was driving this home." She laughed at how she couldn't argue with his inexplicable gestures even now. "I'm going to give it back to him in a couple of months, when he's forgotten why he gave it to me in the first place, but until then, I'm just enjoying it."
"It's great," Catherine agreed, swinging the car into the garage. "I'm completely jealous. They got situated, and soon were sitting out on the deck, sipping iced tea and drowsing. Catherine noted Sara's outfit lived up to her tomboy status, a pair of cut-off jeans and a black sports bra, but the rather demure attire showed off her long muscular legs and wide shoulders as well as the bruises that mottled her arms and back. Her eyes were hidden behind sunglasses, but she appeared to be dozing, so Catherine examined her at her leisure. She didn't think she had ever seen Sara so relaxed around her before, and she once again regretted being so hard on the young woman. Every insult she had directed at Sara replayed itself before her eyes, as well as every time Sara had tried to open up to her. She remembered the carnival case, where the mother had drowned her child, and Sara's plaintive, "We're not getting lunch, are we?" after they had tangled about Catherine's motivations.
On the other lounge chair, Sara was not only awake, but well aware of Catherine's scrutiny as well. She still wasn't sure what impulse had driven her to invite them to stay with her, and she was undecided on whether she would regret it or not, but since she had left Vegas, Sara had made a concerted effort to be more open and social in her life. Inviting Catherine and Lindsey to stay with her was definitely part of that effort, but there was such a thing as being too open as well. Too late now, she thought to herself, as she swiveled her head to Catherine, eliciting a slight jolt of surprise from the older woman.
"You're working your first shift tonight, right?"
"Yeah," Catherine's voice was lazy and tired, as the heat finally started getting to her. Sara's glance took in her drooping eyelids as well as her very pale skin. "You should go in and take a nap." Catherine grunted her reply, as if words were too much of an effort. "You are going to burn if you sleep out here. Even with the sunblock," Sara said patiently, as if talking to a child.
Catherine sighed. "Yeah, but it feels so good," she pouted.
Sara chuckled. "The sun will still be here later." Catherine grumbled at her logic, but she hoisted herself out of the chair. She paused beside Sara, noting that Sara looked tanned enough to keep her from burning if she fell asleep. "You need anything before I go?"
She considered for a moment. "Yeah, can you bring me the phone? I was going to have the team come over for a quick dinner before shift so I can break the news to them about their new supervisor in person." Shielding her eyes with her hand, she looked up at Catherine. "That ok with you?"
"Yeah, actually, that would be better than them hearing the news as we start the shift."
"I thought so too. I'm just going to order something in since I don't feel like cooking and I'm pretty sure I need to run to the grocery soon. Chinese or pizza?"
"Surprise me."
Catherine ended up being pleasantly surprised by dinner, as Sara ordered in some excellent Thai food and the atmosphere was relaxed and friendly. The team took the news fairly well, but Jerome didn't look very happy, and Catherine made a note to work on cultivating him. Apparently, pre- and post- shift dinners were a regular occurrence, as all of the younger CSIs knew their way around Sara's kitchen, and there was none of the stiff formality that would signal their unease at being summoned to their supervisor's house. She wondered if Sara did this in a conscious effort to be as unlike Gil as possible; given how she tried to encourage teamwork and frequent, and direct, feedback on performance, Catherine thought this was very likely. She would have liked to complement Sara on how well she was doing, but she was afraid it would sound condescending.
Sara's energy was obviously flagging as Catherine got ready to leave, and she managed to talk her into bed. Amazingly, Sara fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow, and Catherine delayed for a few moments as she watched her slide into a deep sleep. When she got back and was quietly changing into her pajamas, Catherine noticed Sara hadn't moved from the position she had fallen asleep in, and was surprised that she had slept through the night. As she climbed in carefully, still a little nervous about sharing the bed, she saw that Sara's eyes were open, and her sigh was audible, the meaning obvious to them both.
"What?" Sara's sleepy voice belayed her alert eyes. "It's ok, I'll be back to sleep soon. I just wanted to hear how the shift went." Thus began their routine. Once Lindsey arrived, Sara would get up with her and make breakfast, the two of them often disappearing to go to a museum or movie or shopping while Catherine slept. When Catherine got up, the three of them spent the afternoon together, sightseeing or playing in a park before Sara cooked dinner while Catherine took her shower before work. And every night, when Catherine slipped into bed, Sara woke up and, curled up and facing each other on opposite pillows, Catherine would fill her in on everything that happened during the shift.
Catherine had immediately realized that she had underestimated Sara's baby- sitting abilities that first morning she woke up and Lindsey filled her in on the morning that included flying kites on the beach and a walk in the park. As she watched the two together, Catherine realized that Sara was good with Lindsey because she didn't treat her as a kid, but instead talked with her seriously, as if talking to an adult. It didn't hurt that Sara enjoyed the activities she and Lindsey shared as well, another thing Catherine realized the first time she caught them climbing the jungle gym together. There was a charming, kid-like quality to Sara when she let her guard down and just had fun, and Lindsey seemed to bring that out. Surprisingly, it was soccer that they really bonded over, and Catherine knew most mornings while she slept, they spent hours practicing. She had to admit it was a side of Sara she had never imagined, and given that Sara had always said she wasn't good with kids, she thought that it might have surprised Sara as well.
One night, after a particularly draining case involving a child abduction, Catherine slid under the covers and Sara didn't wake up. "Sara?" Catherine asked, gently reaching over and shaking her shoulder. Sara's body lurched under her hand, but she didn't wake up. That's when Catherine noticed a note under the reading lamp on her side of the bed. "C – Doctor gave me sleeping pills and made me take one tonight. Talk to you in the morning – S" Catherine smiled to herself as she read the note, thinking how thoughtful the gesture was as her eyes closed.
When her eyes popped open in the middle of her nightmare, Catherine sat up so quickly she hit her head on the headboard and grunted in pain. The remnants of the nightmare flashed behind her eyes; a little girl who looked like Lindsey, Lindsey herself in a car filling with water, and a trunk lid opening to reveal Sara's bruised and battered face. Her deep breaths calmed her somewhat as sweat cooled on her skin, but the images didn't recede quickly or easily.
"Cath." Sara's voice was so quiet and sleepy she could barely hear it, but the concern was clear. "You ok?"
Catherine slid down in the bed carefully, facing Sara across the pillows. "Yeah." Sara reached over and brushed a few stray hairs off her damp forehead, and she turned her face into the caress as she felt Sara's fingers slide down her cheek. Sara's expression was doubtful as she gazed across, but Catherine saw her eyes blink rapidly as she fought against sleep. "Sure?" Sara asked as she caught and held Catherine's hand in her own, loosely lacing their fingers together in the center of the bed. Catherine nodded and smiled, watching Sara's eyes close. She lay, staring at their entwined hands for a long time before following Sara's example and going back to sleep. When she awoke, Sara was sitting beside her on the bed, a book propped up on her knees and a look of concentration on her face. "You want to talk about it?" Sara's question cut through the fog of sleepiness as Catherine stretched and rubbed her eyes.
"About what?" She answered, hoping maybe if she played it off, Sara would let it drop.
"You screamed, at the end of that nightmare." The scream had pulled Sara out of a deep, drugged sleep to see Catherine bolt upright in bed, the terror in her eyes evident by the light of the reading lamp she had apparently forgot to turn off, and the sight had occupied Sara's thoughts all morning. So when Lindsey had curled up on the couch to watch cartoons, Sara had ended up back in the bedroom watching Catherine sleep. Which wasn't exactly a hardship, Sara mused, considering how she had memorized the lines of Catherine's face as the sunlight had outlined the sharp angles of her face and cast her lips into sharp relief. Sara would have loved to have captured the play of light across her features, but taking pictures of her while she slept would have been rude to say the very least. She had finally had to pick up a book, but even then thoughts of waking up holding Catherine's hand had interfered with her concentration.
Catherine sat up, embarrassed by her outburst the night before. "Just a nightmare." Her expression was pensive. "Bad night at work last night." She saw Sara's questioning look. "Later, ok? I... kinda want to spend some time with Lindsey." Disappointment shown in Sara's eyes, but she seemed to read the meaning behind Catherine's words.
"Why don't the two of you go shopping?" she suggested. Catherine opened her mouth to protest, but Sara cut her off. "I need to run to the market this afternoon, and you know I have a limited ability to look at various shades of pink for more than ten minutes, tops." Her apparent understanding soothed Catherine's worry, and she caught her hand and squeezed it, trying to convey her appreciation.
"Thanks. Could you tell Linds to get ready? I'm going to take an early shower." Sara hopped up, and strode out of the door before Catherine called her back. She leaned in the doorway, an eyebrow extended to show she was listening. "Thanks." Sara shook her head silently, as if to say there was no need for thanks, and then she disappeared from the doorway, leaving Catherine to stare after her, lost in thought.
Sara sighed as she leaned back against the upholstery of the Mustang and closed her eyes, glad to be out of the hospital at last. She was a lousy patient, she knew, and the last day she had been pretty hard to take. Even though Catherine had brought her books, journals, and DVDs, and every one of her CSIs had visited, spending time just sitting was incredibly draining for her. The nursing staff was probably very glad to see the last of her. Even though she was in more pain than she would ever admit, leaving the hospital was a relief.
The mid-morning sun felt good as they cruised, and Sara happily made plans to spend the afternoon on her deck, soaking it all in. If she had to be a lazy bum for the next few weeks, at least she could do it outdoors. She felt rather than saw Catherine's repeated glances her way as they drove, and finally she couldn't take it anymore. "What?" she asked, squinting one eye open.
"I've just been wondering where you got the car."
"Not my style, huh?" Sara replied, catching Catherine's sheepish look as she voiced what the older CSI had been thinking. She laughed and shifted up in the seat, trying to hide her wince of pain and knowing that Catherine caught everything. "My dad. My parents own a B&B outside the city." She considered saying something more about her parents, but her sometimes difficult relationship with them was not something she wanted to share. "I went out to see them when I got back and Dad took one look at my car and decided I needed some color." She shook her head in disbelief that her parents never ceased to amaze and infuriate her. "I think his exact words were, 'White is the color of death. You need some vibrancy in your life. It will help your life energy.' Next thing I knew, I was driving this home." She laughed at how she couldn't argue with his inexplicable gestures even now. "I'm going to give it back to him in a couple of months, when he's forgotten why he gave it to me in the first place, but until then, I'm just enjoying it."
"It's great," Catherine agreed, swinging the car into the garage. "I'm completely jealous. They got situated, and soon were sitting out on the deck, sipping iced tea and drowsing. Catherine noted Sara's outfit lived up to her tomboy status, a pair of cut-off jeans and a black sports bra, but the rather demure attire showed off her long muscular legs and wide shoulders as well as the bruises that mottled her arms and back. Her eyes were hidden behind sunglasses, but she appeared to be dozing, so Catherine examined her at her leisure. She didn't think she had ever seen Sara so relaxed around her before, and she once again regretted being so hard on the young woman. Every insult she had directed at Sara replayed itself before her eyes, as well as every time Sara had tried to open up to her. She remembered the carnival case, where the mother had drowned her child, and Sara's plaintive, "We're not getting lunch, are we?" after they had tangled about Catherine's motivations.
On the other lounge chair, Sara was not only awake, but well aware of Catherine's scrutiny as well. She still wasn't sure what impulse had driven her to invite them to stay with her, and she was undecided on whether she would regret it or not, but since she had left Vegas, Sara had made a concerted effort to be more open and social in her life. Inviting Catherine and Lindsey to stay with her was definitely part of that effort, but there was such a thing as being too open as well. Too late now, she thought to herself, as she swiveled her head to Catherine, eliciting a slight jolt of surprise from the older woman.
"You're working your first shift tonight, right?"
"Yeah," Catherine's voice was lazy and tired, as the heat finally started getting to her. Sara's glance took in her drooping eyelids as well as her very pale skin. "You should go in and take a nap." Catherine grunted her reply, as if words were too much of an effort. "You are going to burn if you sleep out here. Even with the sunblock," Sara said patiently, as if talking to a child.
Catherine sighed. "Yeah, but it feels so good," she pouted.
Sara chuckled. "The sun will still be here later." Catherine grumbled at her logic, but she hoisted herself out of the chair. She paused beside Sara, noting that Sara looked tanned enough to keep her from burning if she fell asleep. "You need anything before I go?"
She considered for a moment. "Yeah, can you bring me the phone? I was going to have the team come over for a quick dinner before shift so I can break the news to them about their new supervisor in person." Shielding her eyes with her hand, she looked up at Catherine. "That ok with you?"
"Yeah, actually, that would be better than them hearing the news as we start the shift."
"I thought so too. I'm just going to order something in since I don't feel like cooking and I'm pretty sure I need to run to the grocery soon. Chinese or pizza?"
"Surprise me."
Catherine ended up being pleasantly surprised by dinner, as Sara ordered in some excellent Thai food and the atmosphere was relaxed and friendly. The team took the news fairly well, but Jerome didn't look very happy, and Catherine made a note to work on cultivating him. Apparently, pre- and post- shift dinners were a regular occurrence, as all of the younger CSIs knew their way around Sara's kitchen, and there was none of the stiff formality that would signal their unease at being summoned to their supervisor's house. She wondered if Sara did this in a conscious effort to be as unlike Gil as possible; given how she tried to encourage teamwork and frequent, and direct, feedback on performance, Catherine thought this was very likely. She would have liked to complement Sara on how well she was doing, but she was afraid it would sound condescending.
Sara's energy was obviously flagging as Catherine got ready to leave, and she managed to talk her into bed. Amazingly, Sara fell asleep as soon as her head hit the pillow, and Catherine delayed for a few moments as she watched her slide into a deep sleep. When she got back and was quietly changing into her pajamas, Catherine noticed Sara hadn't moved from the position she had fallen asleep in, and was surprised that she had slept through the night. As she climbed in carefully, still a little nervous about sharing the bed, she saw that Sara's eyes were open, and her sigh was audible, the meaning obvious to them both.
"What?" Sara's sleepy voice belayed her alert eyes. "It's ok, I'll be back to sleep soon. I just wanted to hear how the shift went." Thus began their routine. Once Lindsey arrived, Sara would get up with her and make breakfast, the two of them often disappearing to go to a museum or movie or shopping while Catherine slept. When Catherine got up, the three of them spent the afternoon together, sightseeing or playing in a park before Sara cooked dinner while Catherine took her shower before work. And every night, when Catherine slipped into bed, Sara woke up and, curled up and facing each other on opposite pillows, Catherine would fill her in on everything that happened during the shift.
Catherine had immediately realized that she had underestimated Sara's baby- sitting abilities that first morning she woke up and Lindsey filled her in on the morning that included flying kites on the beach and a walk in the park. As she watched the two together, Catherine realized that Sara was good with Lindsey because she didn't treat her as a kid, but instead talked with her seriously, as if talking to an adult. It didn't hurt that Sara enjoyed the activities she and Lindsey shared as well, another thing Catherine realized the first time she caught them climbing the jungle gym together. There was a charming, kid-like quality to Sara when she let her guard down and just had fun, and Lindsey seemed to bring that out. Surprisingly, it was soccer that they really bonded over, and Catherine knew most mornings while she slept, they spent hours practicing. She had to admit it was a side of Sara she had never imagined, and given that Sara had always said she wasn't good with kids, she thought that it might have surprised Sara as well.
One night, after a particularly draining case involving a child abduction, Catherine slid under the covers and Sara didn't wake up. "Sara?" Catherine asked, gently reaching over and shaking her shoulder. Sara's body lurched under her hand, but she didn't wake up. That's when Catherine noticed a note under the reading lamp on her side of the bed. "C – Doctor gave me sleeping pills and made me take one tonight. Talk to you in the morning – S" Catherine smiled to herself as she read the note, thinking how thoughtful the gesture was as her eyes closed.
When her eyes popped open in the middle of her nightmare, Catherine sat up so quickly she hit her head on the headboard and grunted in pain. The remnants of the nightmare flashed behind her eyes; a little girl who looked like Lindsey, Lindsey herself in a car filling with water, and a trunk lid opening to reveal Sara's bruised and battered face. Her deep breaths calmed her somewhat as sweat cooled on her skin, but the images didn't recede quickly or easily.
"Cath." Sara's voice was so quiet and sleepy she could barely hear it, but the concern was clear. "You ok?"
Catherine slid down in the bed carefully, facing Sara across the pillows. "Yeah." Sara reached over and brushed a few stray hairs off her damp forehead, and she turned her face into the caress as she felt Sara's fingers slide down her cheek. Sara's expression was doubtful as she gazed across, but Catherine saw her eyes blink rapidly as she fought against sleep. "Sure?" Sara asked as she caught and held Catherine's hand in her own, loosely lacing their fingers together in the center of the bed. Catherine nodded and smiled, watching Sara's eyes close. She lay, staring at their entwined hands for a long time before following Sara's example and going back to sleep. When she awoke, Sara was sitting beside her on the bed, a book propped up on her knees and a look of concentration on her face. "You want to talk about it?" Sara's question cut through the fog of sleepiness as Catherine stretched and rubbed her eyes.
"About what?" She answered, hoping maybe if she played it off, Sara would let it drop.
"You screamed, at the end of that nightmare." The scream had pulled Sara out of a deep, drugged sleep to see Catherine bolt upright in bed, the terror in her eyes evident by the light of the reading lamp she had apparently forgot to turn off, and the sight had occupied Sara's thoughts all morning. So when Lindsey had curled up on the couch to watch cartoons, Sara had ended up back in the bedroom watching Catherine sleep. Which wasn't exactly a hardship, Sara mused, considering how she had memorized the lines of Catherine's face as the sunlight had outlined the sharp angles of her face and cast her lips into sharp relief. Sara would have loved to have captured the play of light across her features, but taking pictures of her while she slept would have been rude to say the very least. She had finally had to pick up a book, but even then thoughts of waking up holding Catherine's hand had interfered with her concentration.
Catherine sat up, embarrassed by her outburst the night before. "Just a nightmare." Her expression was pensive. "Bad night at work last night." She saw Sara's questioning look. "Later, ok? I... kinda want to spend some time with Lindsey." Disappointment shown in Sara's eyes, but she seemed to read the meaning behind Catherine's words.
"Why don't the two of you go shopping?" she suggested. Catherine opened her mouth to protest, but Sara cut her off. "I need to run to the market this afternoon, and you know I have a limited ability to look at various shades of pink for more than ten minutes, tops." Her apparent understanding soothed Catherine's worry, and she caught her hand and squeezed it, trying to convey her appreciation.
"Thanks. Could you tell Linds to get ready? I'm going to take an early shower." Sara hopped up, and strode out of the door before Catherine called her back. She leaned in the doorway, an eyebrow extended to show she was listening. "Thanks." Sara shook her head silently, as if to say there was no need for thanks, and then she disappeared from the doorway, leaving Catherine to stare after her, lost in thought.