Note: This one is in Duo's point of view.
Quite
I saw him, mindlessly just tossing cans of various foods into his cart. I've never seen him so lifeless before and somehow he looks much older than his age. All I can do is wonder what he's been through what he's going through at that moment, what thoughts in your mind are plaguing you so Trowa? Who's hurt you?
I wanted more than anything to go to him and wrap my arms around his familiar torso. Sadly to say I followed him around the store for a while, hoping he would see me, run into me something just so that we would come in contact with one another. Than a thought struck me, was he happy now that he had his new girlfriend. Spite hit me like a ton of bricks on fire and I went back to despising him, his smile, his home, his touch, and his girlfriend so perfect in her pale blue skirts. I saw him again, in fact he passed right by me and didn't even notice; the look in his eyes made me want to cry. That was something I could never hate, his eyes they told you everything you needed to know about him, his past, his presnt, his entire life.
His once bright green eyes use to light up a room, now all they seemed to do was flicker between pain and despair. An unexpected pang of regret and guilt overwhelmed me and all I could do was stare at his dull presence and wish I could read his now fragile mind.
Leaving the grocery store gave me some sort of relief I was not expecting to have. Like a huge wieght had be lifted from me. Unbalanced, unstable I wasn't doing so well myself theses days come to think of it. Lately I've felt lost, stuck in the middle of a huge crowd going in so many directions, so many left turns, I get dizzy, frustrated, so helpless in my own mind. When and how did I make it home? I don't remember and blatantly I don't care.
I didn't even realize it had gotten so late it's midnight already, I lock all the doors once I get in all the groceries and put them away. Walking down the hall of my home I start to turn out all the lights and suddenly it feels like the end of the world this Sunday night. After I turned out all the lights I figured I would lay down in my bed for a while and just sleep, but for some reason I can't seem to find the quite inside my mind.
So I let my mind wonder for a while, I figure if I let it run eventually it will run out of thought, but I guess I'm wrong. I couldn't stop thinking about Trowa and how he looked. No, no I needed to get my mind off of him. I look out the window in my living room and realize how quite it is outside, then soon water, drops of rain make their way to the dirty impure floor.
You know, often the lights go out and the city turns a different shade of sad. That dark place in our souls becomes more apparent in our minds and we can't help but cry. But that burden is never lifted, constantly it collects more weight over time, shadowing our souls forever.
Damnit I was still thinking.
I turn to face right on the couch and grab the remote off the arm and promptly turn on the T.V., but I mute it hoping that if I just watched it would help clear my mind. I watched at the lights danced across the screen blue, red, yellow, black, purple, and green..........green.......green..........Trowa. What was I supposed to do, I was at a lose I wanted to talk to him know what was wrong feel his pain, and yet I wonder if he ever felt mine?
Quietly I stared at the phone on my small coffee table slightly hoping it would ring or perhaps that I would pick it up and call him. I was stuck between curiosity and pride I wanted to call him figure out what was wrong, but the other half of me was happy that he was hurting the way he was. I know it's vindictive to think this way, but I can't help it. And for some reason the room in which I sit seems to get smaller, and all of my fears have cornered me here along with my TV screen.
I don't want to face any of this, I know deep down inside me I still love Trowa more then anything in this world even my family. But he hurt me, he left me............I've been so alone since then; no one could replace that chunk he took with him that once had a place in my heart.
I reached for the phone and started to dial his number, it rang and I panicked and hung up before the second ring. I feel so pathetic doing something so childish, so junior high. Reaching for the phone again I dialed the same number as before, it actually surprises me that he never changed it. I hear the answering machine pick up, but for some reason don't hang up. I guess I'm just that desperate to hear his voice.
"Hey this is the Barton residence I'm Trowa, and I'm not home or can't reach the phone at the moment so if you could plea-"
Next think I knew the message was cut off and the real thing answered and still I didn't hang up.
"This is Trowa." Seconds passed and I didn't speak, just listened. "Hello? Is someone there?"
"........." even if I was going to speak I didn't know what to say.
"If someone's there push a button." I did willingly.
"Hm-mm I see, not a talker are we, or at least at the moment." He must have found some comfort in my silence or knew somehow it was me. I mean who else would push a button.
"ssss..." I blew into the phone softly wanting him to quite for a few seconds. And somehow he got my message and for the first few minutes of the night I was at peace with myself.
"I may know you, I may not and in a way I want you to be one single person. The person I dream of constantly, the one."
"I-"he cut me off.
"Please don't speak, I might die if I figure out who you really are or rather are not. So for now just be there." After that neither of us made a sound, just the thought of knowing we were there was enough to make us both feel content.
I don't remember when, but my phone died. It was bound to happen, I could even hear his phone beeping wildly like always. It actually made me smile knowing that he never had gotten rid of the phone I got for him.
Still laying on the couch I looked up at the ceiling maybe hoping to find more consolence. Maybe he didn't want to be with that girl anymore, maybe he realized how perfect we were that we need each other. More wishful thinking, if he wanted me he'd find me, he'd come looking.
How much longer could I delude myself, I don't know? All I know is that I can't take this bleak emptiness anymore, the dark room still seems to be closing in on me and I know I can't take much more of this.
And as if my prayers had been answered dawn was rising bathing the walls with its beautiful warm rays of light. Calming that creature inside me which hadn't seemed to stop chatting since dark had unfurled.
Slowly I walked to my room, and the only sound I could hear were that of my feet lightly tapping he ground beneath me. Now I'm safe, at least by the light of the day, which has taken everything away. I laid down unto my bed and closed my eyes, then I heard my phone ring a little more then reluctant I didn't go to pick it up. I listened as the manufactured voice answered for me.
"Hello, no one is home at the moment please leave a message after the tone."
BEEP
"How befitting that you remain anonymous, and this is.............well this is Trowa we talked or rather I talked. Well I just called because, well actually I'm not sure why I called, but for some reason, I guess there was just something in our silence that seemed so familiar so comfortable that I just felt the sudden urge to call you. Whoever you are. Well............good- bye."
"And for some reason that felt so final." I heard myself whisper.
I need to get away from here,
I need to get my life back,
I need Trowa.
The next day I booked myself a flight as far away from my home as possible. I found myself on a plain. Canada to Cali, I couldn't have asked for anything better than this transaction from my cold past to a warm future. I loaded my luggage and then went and got a quick pick-me-up in the terminal by the time I got back to the plain it was already boarding.
I was the last man in and for some reason I was told I was lucky, still not sure why. I found the only available seat and found that my seat buddy was asleep and had covered himself in his long black coat. I placed my carry on bag in the storage compartment then sat back down and buckled my seatbelt. I nudged my new would-be companion and was shocked beyond belief, words couldn't describe how I felt at this moment.
"Duo? What are you doing here?" I could ask the same question Trowa.
"What are you........"
A/N: said I would get it up fast, I don't know if this is any good or not but I'm going to finish it in a matter of days.
So feed back would be nice, - , but anywho I hope someone liked it.
Quite
I saw him, mindlessly just tossing cans of various foods into his cart. I've never seen him so lifeless before and somehow he looks much older than his age. All I can do is wonder what he's been through what he's going through at that moment, what thoughts in your mind are plaguing you so Trowa? Who's hurt you?
I wanted more than anything to go to him and wrap my arms around his familiar torso. Sadly to say I followed him around the store for a while, hoping he would see me, run into me something just so that we would come in contact with one another. Than a thought struck me, was he happy now that he had his new girlfriend. Spite hit me like a ton of bricks on fire and I went back to despising him, his smile, his home, his touch, and his girlfriend so perfect in her pale blue skirts. I saw him again, in fact he passed right by me and didn't even notice; the look in his eyes made me want to cry. That was something I could never hate, his eyes they told you everything you needed to know about him, his past, his presnt, his entire life.
His once bright green eyes use to light up a room, now all they seemed to do was flicker between pain and despair. An unexpected pang of regret and guilt overwhelmed me and all I could do was stare at his dull presence and wish I could read his now fragile mind.
Leaving the grocery store gave me some sort of relief I was not expecting to have. Like a huge wieght had be lifted from me. Unbalanced, unstable I wasn't doing so well myself theses days come to think of it. Lately I've felt lost, stuck in the middle of a huge crowd going in so many directions, so many left turns, I get dizzy, frustrated, so helpless in my own mind. When and how did I make it home? I don't remember and blatantly I don't care.
I didn't even realize it had gotten so late it's midnight already, I lock all the doors once I get in all the groceries and put them away. Walking down the hall of my home I start to turn out all the lights and suddenly it feels like the end of the world this Sunday night. After I turned out all the lights I figured I would lay down in my bed for a while and just sleep, but for some reason I can't seem to find the quite inside my mind.
So I let my mind wonder for a while, I figure if I let it run eventually it will run out of thought, but I guess I'm wrong. I couldn't stop thinking about Trowa and how he looked. No, no I needed to get my mind off of him. I look out the window in my living room and realize how quite it is outside, then soon water, drops of rain make their way to the dirty impure floor.
You know, often the lights go out and the city turns a different shade of sad. That dark place in our souls becomes more apparent in our minds and we can't help but cry. But that burden is never lifted, constantly it collects more weight over time, shadowing our souls forever.
Damnit I was still thinking.
I turn to face right on the couch and grab the remote off the arm and promptly turn on the T.V., but I mute it hoping that if I just watched it would help clear my mind. I watched at the lights danced across the screen blue, red, yellow, black, purple, and green..........green.......green..........Trowa. What was I supposed to do, I was at a lose I wanted to talk to him know what was wrong feel his pain, and yet I wonder if he ever felt mine?
Quietly I stared at the phone on my small coffee table slightly hoping it would ring or perhaps that I would pick it up and call him. I was stuck between curiosity and pride I wanted to call him figure out what was wrong, but the other half of me was happy that he was hurting the way he was. I know it's vindictive to think this way, but I can't help it. And for some reason the room in which I sit seems to get smaller, and all of my fears have cornered me here along with my TV screen.
I don't want to face any of this, I know deep down inside me I still love Trowa more then anything in this world even my family. But he hurt me, he left me............I've been so alone since then; no one could replace that chunk he took with him that once had a place in my heart.
I reached for the phone and started to dial his number, it rang and I panicked and hung up before the second ring. I feel so pathetic doing something so childish, so junior high. Reaching for the phone again I dialed the same number as before, it actually surprises me that he never changed it. I hear the answering machine pick up, but for some reason don't hang up. I guess I'm just that desperate to hear his voice.
"Hey this is the Barton residence I'm Trowa, and I'm not home or can't reach the phone at the moment so if you could plea-"
Next think I knew the message was cut off and the real thing answered and still I didn't hang up.
"This is Trowa." Seconds passed and I didn't speak, just listened. "Hello? Is someone there?"
"........." even if I was going to speak I didn't know what to say.
"If someone's there push a button." I did willingly.
"Hm-mm I see, not a talker are we, or at least at the moment." He must have found some comfort in my silence or knew somehow it was me. I mean who else would push a button.
"ssss..." I blew into the phone softly wanting him to quite for a few seconds. And somehow he got my message and for the first few minutes of the night I was at peace with myself.
"I may know you, I may not and in a way I want you to be one single person. The person I dream of constantly, the one."
"I-"he cut me off.
"Please don't speak, I might die if I figure out who you really are or rather are not. So for now just be there." After that neither of us made a sound, just the thought of knowing we were there was enough to make us both feel content.
I don't remember when, but my phone died. It was bound to happen, I could even hear his phone beeping wildly like always. It actually made me smile knowing that he never had gotten rid of the phone I got for him.
Still laying on the couch I looked up at the ceiling maybe hoping to find more consolence. Maybe he didn't want to be with that girl anymore, maybe he realized how perfect we were that we need each other. More wishful thinking, if he wanted me he'd find me, he'd come looking.
How much longer could I delude myself, I don't know? All I know is that I can't take this bleak emptiness anymore, the dark room still seems to be closing in on me and I know I can't take much more of this.
And as if my prayers had been answered dawn was rising bathing the walls with its beautiful warm rays of light. Calming that creature inside me which hadn't seemed to stop chatting since dark had unfurled.
Slowly I walked to my room, and the only sound I could hear were that of my feet lightly tapping he ground beneath me. Now I'm safe, at least by the light of the day, which has taken everything away. I laid down unto my bed and closed my eyes, then I heard my phone ring a little more then reluctant I didn't go to pick it up. I listened as the manufactured voice answered for me.
"Hello, no one is home at the moment please leave a message after the tone."
BEEP
"How befitting that you remain anonymous, and this is.............well this is Trowa we talked or rather I talked. Well I just called because, well actually I'm not sure why I called, but for some reason, I guess there was just something in our silence that seemed so familiar so comfortable that I just felt the sudden urge to call you. Whoever you are. Well............good- bye."
"And for some reason that felt so final." I heard myself whisper.
I need to get away from here,
I need to get my life back,
I need Trowa.
The next day I booked myself a flight as far away from my home as possible. I found myself on a plain. Canada to Cali, I couldn't have asked for anything better than this transaction from my cold past to a warm future. I loaded my luggage and then went and got a quick pick-me-up in the terminal by the time I got back to the plain it was already boarding.
I was the last man in and for some reason I was told I was lucky, still not sure why. I found the only available seat and found that my seat buddy was asleep and had covered himself in his long black coat. I placed my carry on bag in the storage compartment then sat back down and buckled my seatbelt. I nudged my new would-be companion and was shocked beyond belief, words couldn't describe how I felt at this moment.
"Duo? What are you doing here?" I could ask the same question Trowa.
"What are you........"
A/N: said I would get it up fast, I don't know if this is any good or not but I'm going to finish it in a matter of days.
So feed back would be nice, - , but anywho I hope someone liked it.