Author's Note: See? I made it in less than a month. :) I have a little announcement to make that I have to share because I'm so happy. We've got a little baby horse! She was born on Friday, and she's the prettiest little thing ever. The only thing left is to come up with a name for her. I'll let you know once we've got one. :) I just love her! I tried to put some pics of her up, but this site isn't letting me do that, so go to my bio and click on my homepage where I have some links to pics of her if you want to see.

Disclaimer: I don't own anybody, but that wasn't by my own choice.

Family Relations

By Be Boring

Chapter 15: Revelations

It was nearly noon by the time Jondy woke up the next day. It was easily the best night's sleep she had ever gotten, and she knew why. There could be no safer place than where she was now, especially with four other X5s in the house. It seemed that Zack owned a safe house in Osage, Wyoming, and had stayed there with Ben until he found an opening to sneak into Manticore. It was a pretty nice place, too. She couldn't imagine who had needed this house built, there were seven bedrooms altogether; three on the first floor, four on the second. Jondy had picked out the smallest yet most comfortable room out of all of them on the second floor, and for the moment she simply couldn't imagine ever getting out of that bed. Kiera and Zack were both downstairs, and Ben and Shayna had both picked upstairs rooms near Jondy. Actually, it had been Shayna's choice to be near Jondy, their time in Manticore had brought them a lot closer. Ben had asked endless questions about the baby, asking both Shayna and Jondy about what Manticore had done during the pregnancy.

Zack hadn't fully woken up ever since they had arrived at the safe house, but Kiera assured everyone that he was going to be fine. The serious bleeding had stopped while they were hiding in the little hole in the side of the hill. Now she said he was just recovering at his own pace, but that he would probably be wide awake within twenty-four hours. She couldn't wait, because she knew he could fill in the gaps in her memory. She remembered odd things here and there, but even the basics about how her life had been going were a mystery to her. Hardly anything about her time as SIC had come back to her, so she didn't even really remember the details about Zack. What about the X5s she had been helping him keep an eye on? She didn't remember much about any of them except for a vague image of what they looked like.

"Rise and shine!" an eager voice exclaimed from the doorway. Shayna was standing there, smiling brightly with her hands on her stomach. "The baby's really moving today, more than it ever used to. Wanna feel?"

Jondy grinned and sat up, holding out a hand as Shayna approached. That was one thing that had worried her about their stay at Manticore; the baby hardly ever moved. Maybe Shayna's stress was carrying over to him or her, because it hardly ever kicked. Now Jondy eagerly but gently placed her hand on Shayna's belly, grinning again when she felt the powerful kicks of the tiny baby. "What do you hope it is? Do you want a boy or a girl?"

Shayna sat down on the bed next to Jondy and looked down at her stomach happily. "I really want a little girl. I know a lot of women say that, but that's what I want. And I really hope she looks like a little female version of Ben. That would make me happier than anything else."

Jondy knew that was asking a lot, but she hoped Shayna got her wish. She had missed Tinga's pregnancy, so it was good to be with another sister through hers. Suddenly, what Shayna had said really settled in. A little female version of Ben. She had forgotten about Ben being the father of the baby. Wait, why do I remember something else? "Shayna, had you told me someone else was the father?"

She blushed and stared at the floor. "Yeah, when you first found out I was pregnant, I told you that Zack was the father." She broke off, refusing to look Jondy in the eye. Now it was coming back to her. Shayna had made it sound like Zack raped her after finding out she was living with an ordinary man without his permission. She didn't fully remember what the reasoning had been behind it, but she knew it had something to do with Shayna being angry about her unwilling separation from Ben.

Seeing the guilty look on her sister's face, Jondy gently patted the wriggling baby. "Don't worry about it, I think I already knew you were lying. And if you're wondering, I won't hold it against you. We have too much to be thankful for right now to worry about all that crap."

Shayna's relief showed clearly on her glowing face. As she left and Jondy started getting dressed, she realized that since now Shayna was free, she had quickly developed that glow most mothers are supposed to have. In her opinion, Shayna had never looked more beautiful than she did right now, even with the appearance of having a basketball shoved up her shirt. When she had finished changing, she rushed downstairs for something to eat. Kiera chuckled from the table when she rushed into the kitchen. "I thought you didn't sleep?"

"I guess I had to catch up eventually," Jondy retorted playfully as she grabbed the box of doughnuts on the counter. "Who got these?"

"I sent Ben for them this morning. You're actually the last person to wake up, even Zack woke up over two hours ago."

Jondy perked up at this news. "Really? Is it okay if I go in and talk to him for a while?"

Kiera shrugged. "Sure, if you want. He's a little crabby right now, but I suppose I would be too if I had just lost practically half the blood in my body."

She smiled slightly and strode off to Zack's room with three doughnuts in her hand. When she knocked on his door, she heard a familiar grunt of permission that she knew he had given her before, even if she didn't remember any particular incidents. It generally meant that he would allow you to be by him, but he didn't really want you to be. As soon as she had stepped through the doorway, however, he seemed to brighten up. "I wondered when you would be in to see me. I figured I would wake up with you sitting next to me, seeing as how you don't sleep."

She blushed and sat down in a tattered recliner that had been dragged next to the bed. "I guess I needed my sleep, because I just woke up. How are you feeling?"

"Fine, I guess. I'm just relieved we're all out of there." He hesitated for a moment, then offered a smile that warmed her completely. She could sense a compliment coming already, even though with Zack she instinctively knew that his praise tended to come as a bit of a surprise. "You did a great job out there. Kiera told me all about it, and I remember a little bit too. To tell you the truth, the only thing I clearly remember is you ordering Kiera to help you take my pants off. Embarrassing, but effective."

Jondy flashed a grin at the faint blush in his cheeks. "Wouldn't Lydecker flip if he saw surveillance of me depantsing you?" He glared at her with some embarrassed indignation, but reluctantly smiled back. She decided now was as good a time as any to start filling in her memories. "I need to ask you about a lot of things, and I'm pretty sure you've already thought over what you'll tell me and what you would rather have me remember on my own. First thing's first, why did you pick me to be your SIC?"

Zack stared steadily into her eyes, and she had to look away to keep from blushing at the affection that was in his. "After how you handled everything after I was injured, you shouldn't even have to ask, but of course you know I'm going to tell you anyway. I was going through a rough patch with everybody, and I had just taken you away from the Casteau's. Ben royally pissed me off, so I cut him off. Told him if he needed help, he would need to take care of it on his own. Shayna was living with somebody and was refusing to move, and Kiera had just majorly disappointed me. I decided I needed somebody to help me keep everyone happy, which happens to not be one of my many talents. Because you reminded me so much of Eva, I decided there was no one I'd rather have as my SIC than you. Any questions so far?"

He didn't press anything, due to the fact that her eyes were darting back and forth rapidly as memories flashed through her head. It was like she was watching a slide show, everything was choppy and disjointed, but she knew the basics of what was going on. At the mention of Ben and Kiera, she remembered immediately that Ben had convinced her to kill with him. He had done it before with Shayna, which resulted in her pregnancy after they became caught up in the moment after the kill. It wasn't that that was disturbing her, though. It was the memory of Zack's story about Eva. She hadn't died when Lydecker shot her—which of course Jondy already knew without remembering the story—and had tried to escape a second time with Zack. When her body gave out, she ordered him to go on ahead. He believed she had died after he left, but Jondy knew better. "Zack, there's something you really need to know. It's about Eva."

That obviously took Zack by surprise. "What about her?"

"It's not your fault she's dead, it's mine."

Now he straightened up in the bed, staring at her with a firm expression of disbelief on his face. "That's ridiculous, you weren't even there when we tried to make a run for it."

"I know that, but she didn't die then. I don't know if they managed to shoot her again, or if it was just a warning shot you heard then, but Eva didn't die that day. I saw her when we were in Manticore."

"If she didn't die, then why are you saying her death is your fault?"

She glared at him, apparently putting enough emotion into her eyes to silence him, because he leaned back against the headboard and didn't make another peep. "Would you just let me finish?" He nodded, now looking concerned at the guilt in her eyes. "I was coming out of the room where she was when you found me for the first time and walked me back to my room. She acted like she was a prisoner there, and she managed to make me talk about some of the X5s. I didn't remember much, of course, but I remembered some stuff about Kiera. That's how they were able to find her. She seemed so happy to see one of us again, that I just didn't see through it. After we stopped my reprogramming and you went for Kiera, I knew she had lied to me and I went to confront her. We had a bit of a fight, and she made me so angry about the way she was talking that I got a little too enthusiastic with the bar I had found. I…" She broke off, feeling like if she said another word, she would burst into tears.

To her surprise, Zack scooted over a little on the bed and motioned for her to come up by him. She hurried to sit next to him, and he gently pulled her against him in a tight hug. Without warning, the tears flooded out of her and she turned to bury her face in his shoulder. He didn't do anything to stop her, in fact, he rubbed her back comfortingly as she sobbed. "I-I killed her, Zack, and I didn't have to!" she cried, her voice muffled against his shoulder. "It was so stupid, why didn't I just knock her out? Why did I kill her?"

"Shhhh," Zack whispered, still rubbing her back soothingly. "It wasn't your fault. I know you would never intentionally hurt an X5 more than was necessary. Before you start arguing, Jace, Prix, and Vega were necessary. Even Eva was necessary, and perhaps it's better this way."

Jondy sat back so quickly that she nearly toppled off the bed. "How can you say that? How could it be better with Eva dead?"

He reached out quickly and grabbed her hand, squeezing it gently but firmly enough so that she couldn't pull it away. "I think once they've been there so long, it would take something drastic to change their minds about where they want to be. Eva was reprogrammed to be faithful to Manticore, which I'm sure was a difficult task for them. It probably took them weeks to break her, which was my fault. I shouldn't have left her all those years ago." As Jondy opened her mouth to protest, he held up a hand sternly enough to stop her. "I let you talk when you wanted to, now give me my turn. What happened so long ago is over, and there's nothing we can do about it now. I'm sure Eva was quite an asset to Manticore. Look at how she convinced you to give up Kiera's location. If they had sent any of the others in there, you wouldn't have given that up. She was dangerous to us, you have to understand that. I didn't want her to die any more than you did, but it's over now, and at least she's not serving Manticore anymore. The real Eva would have wanted that."

Jondy threw herself forward again, forcing him to make a soft "oomph!" as she collided with him in another hug. He squeezed her tightly, and she couldn't help being so grateful for his words. Just like nobody but Eva would have been able to make her compromise the escapees, nobody but Zack would have been able to comfort her like this. Zack didn't say things to make you feel better, he simply told you the truth, so she knew he considered every last word he'd just said to her to be true. Suddenly, with the need she had to make him realize how much she appreciated his comfort, she did something that she probably never would have done otherwise. She tilted her head back from his shoulder, reached up, and pressed her lips very gently against his. For a moment, she leaned forward and deepened the kiss, feeling encouraged by the fact that he wasn't pushing her away, then sat back up very quickly. He was giving her a somewhat quizzical look, but then he turned and looked over her shoulder. Jondy turned around to see Kiera standing in the doorway, carrying a plate of ham and cheese sandwiches. "Sorry to interrupt, but I thought you'd want some lunch." She walked over and set the plate down on Zack's lap, then hurried straight back out.

Jondy scrambled off the bed, suddenly extremely self-conscious. She couldn't believe she had actually kissed Zack. What was she thinking? He was her brother for Christ's sake! "Um, I think I'll go out and have some lunch," she stammered, then rushed out after Kiera, leaving her three uneaten doughnuts completely forgotten on Zack's bed. Kiera was in the kitchen again, pacing back and forth slowly. She looked up when Jondy came in, then straightened up and placed her hands on her hips.

"I know it's not my place to ask, but what was that about?"

She blushed so deeply that she was sure it was showing through even her hair. "I told Zack something that happened in Manticore that upset me, and I guess he comforted me well enough that I just had to show him how grateful I was. It wasn't what you think."

"So you're telling me you didn't just kiss Zack?"

"Well, I did that," Jondy grumbled, hating that she couldn't seem to say what she meant. "It's just that it wasn't a romantic kiss. I was just thanking him for making me feel better. I guess I overdid it a little bit."

Suddenly, Kiera smiled and sat down at the table. "You seem a little too defensive for it to just have been a 'thank you' kiss. Are you sure you don't have feelings for Zack?"

Jondy plopped down at the table, nearly knocking her chair over. "Feelings? No! That's ridiculous, he's my—"

"Jondy, you know as well as I do that he's not your brother. There's nothing wrong about it if you feel something more than a sister's love for him."

Now she was just looking for an excuse to curb Kiera's sudden enthusiasm. "But, he's too old for me! I'm just sixteen, that's illegal."

Kiera rolled her eyes and leaned back in her chair, slowly taking in Jondy's extremely flustered appearance. "Who cares anymore? Twelve-year-olds are prostitutes in broad daylight these days, do you really think anybody's going to care about you two? I would have more reservations about this if you had the mentality of a sixteen-year-old, but you don't. You're extremely mature, and so is Zack. The way I see it, there's nothing stopping—"

Jondy held up both hands automatically, standing up and stepping away from the table. "For both our sakes, just stop right now. You're reading too much into a little kiss, and you're making me more than a little uncomfortable. Whatever my feelings are, they're my feelings, and I'll deal with them as I see fit."

"Are you admitting…?"

"I'm not admitting anything, I'm just stating the facts. All my feelings, no matter what they're about, are my business, and I'd really appreciate you not digging into them." With that, she pivoted on her heel and headed straight upstairs. Right now she just didn't want to deal with anybody, no matter who it was. Ben was insane, Shayna could sometimes be nauseating in her excitement—even though Jondy understood why she was excited about the baby, Kiera was infuriatingly nosy, and Zack was…complicated. She was embarrassed more than anything. She'd gotten carried away with her gratitude, and now she had Kiera on her heels and probably had confused Zack like all hell. Was he going to think she had feelings for him now too? The question that bugged her even more than that was did she have them?

Jondy stayed in her room for several hours, not even bothering to answer when Kiera knocked on the door later that evening and told her that supper was ready. She couldn't confront everybody, not right now. After a while, a tentative knock sounded on her door. "Come in," she called out in resignation. She would have to talk to somebody soon, she couldn't stay locked up forever. To her surprise, when the door opened, it was Ben. He smiled sheepishly and edged his way into the room, not opening the door very far. She couldn't tell if it was out of instinct or if he just didn't want anyone to know he was coming to talk to her.

"How are you doing?" he asked quietly. "I didn't get around to asking you last night, what with all my questions about the baby and all. Are you okay?"

She sighed and sat up on her bed, gesturing for him to come sit by her. "I'm fine, thanks for asking. I almost thought you hadn't noticed I was there." She was teasing, but only half-heartedly. She just wasn't in the mood to joke around. Had that kiss upset her that damn much?

"I'm sorry for not paying more attention. I never got around to thanking you either. You have no idea how much I appreciate you taking care of Shayna like you did. I know Zack's going to separate us soon enough, but I'm glad she's alright. I'm sure her pregnancy will go a lot smoother now that she's out of Manticore. Are you sure you're okay? You're hardly paying any attention to anything I'm saying, and even though I don't really know you that well, that doesn't quite seem like you."

It wasn't that she hadn't been paying attention, it was more that he was sparking off memories of her last encounter with him. "Ben, are you really going to keep killing? You have a baby on the way, do you really want his or her image of you to be as a killer?"

The question caught him off guard, but he shrugged. "I think if they know about the Blue Lady, it will be fine. They'll understand."

"Do you still really believe that stuff? Ben, you made her up. You of all people should know that, you must remember coming up with all those intricate details you gave us. Do you expect us to believe that something just told you those details? The teeth, the Nomlies, the Good Place, don't you even remember making those up?"

He was obviously offended by what she was saying, but her actions with Shayna seemed to be enough to spare her his full anger for now. "Maybe we shouldn't talk about this, it's not going to do either of us any good. You know as well as I do how things are going to play out once Zack's healthy enough to leave here. Kiera and Shayna will be set up with new locations, neither of which will be given to me, and I'll be sent my merry way. Zack isn't going to forgive me for what I've done, and he's not going to bring me back into the fold. As far as he's concerned, I'm a liability and I can't be trusted."

"Can you really blame him for thinking that? As much as I don't want to be as strict as Zack, I agree with him. Until you've stopped killing, you're not safe enough for any of us to be around. The only reason he used you to help him this time is because he knew you would focus on the job at hand because Shayna was in there. Am I right?" How did she know that? How did she know why Zack allowed Ben to take part in the rescue mission? I guess I just know him that well.

He shrugged, leaning his weight down on one hand like he was preparing to get up. "Probably, but I won't pretend to know how Zack's mind works. If you don't mind, I'm going to go check on Shayna." Before she could even say goodnight, he was out the door. There you go, offending him when you know this is one of the last times you'll get to see him. Real smooth, Jondy, just perfect.

She waited at least another hour, then decided to go down and grab something to eat. She hadn't gotten around to eating anything all day, and now she was regretting not eating those doughnuts earlier when she'd had the chance. Silence greeted her as she climbed down the stairs, but when she approached the kitchen, she could hear someone rattling around. Why were they being so noisy? That was easily answered. It wasn't like Zack was the king of grace with his injured leg. He spun around quickly when she walked in, guiltily holding the box of doughnuts. She suspected that he'd managed to empty out the rest of them. "I didn't think anybody was still up," he grumbled uncomfortably, quickly setting the box back on the counter.

"I just thought I'd get something to eat. I guess I wasn't the only one who was hungry."

He picked up the box again and held it out to her. "I didn't get around to eating the last one before you came in. You can have it."

She walked forward and took the box from him, pulling out the last doughnut. It wasn't bad for being the last, it was completely covered in chocolate and she was sure it was cream-filled. After she had it in her hands, she backed up so she could lean on the counter across the room from him. "So, how does your leg feel?"

"Not bad, but I feel like I've been hit by a truck. How are you doing? Kiera told me you spent the entire day up in your room. Did it have to do with what happened when you visited me earlier?"

She blushed and looked away. "Yeah, I guess I was a little embarrassed. I just got too excited, I guess. Sorry if I surprised you."

"Don't be, it's okay. Other than sending Kiera off on a tangent, it wasn't that big of a deal. I know what you were trying to express. I'm just glad I cheered you up, you seemed pretty down."

Relieved that he had blown off the kiss so easily, although also a little upset in the back of her mind, she took a bite of the doughnut. Wow, hunger really is the best seasoning. Nothing had ever tasted better, except perhaps her first chicken dinner she'd had when Zack had taken her away from the Casteau's. A faint smile must have broken out on her face at the memory, because Zack asked, "What are you thinking about?"

She blushed again and quickly swallowed her mouthful of doughnut. "Nothing much, it's just that memories pop into my head every now and then and it's almost like seeing them for the first time. Don't worry, I'm having good memories right now."

"About what?"

"You." The word was out of her mouth before she could stop it, but she looked up quickly to see his reaction. It had taken him by surprise, but then he smiled. "As long as I'm part of the good memories, I won't complain." They stood in comfortable silence on opposite sides of the kitchen while Jondy finished eating, but before she could say goodnight and head up to bed, he managed a strange sort of hobble to get over to her. "Wait, I wanted to do something before you went to bed. I know I'm going out on a limb here, but I figure if I don't do it now, I'll never have the guts to."

Jondy looked up at him in confusion, but he ended that quickly. He moved a hand around to the back of her head and gently pulled her toward him, then leaned down and kissed her softly. At first, her whole body stiffened in panic. What had she put into motion when she'd kissed him earlier? Then, she just didn't care. She reached up and wrapped her arms around his neck, returning the kiss hesitantly, then more boldly. Being this close to him was more intense than she had expected it to be, but she didn't mind. It was just so comfortable, like coming home for the first time in years and finding it as warm and welcoming as when you'd left it.

He had pulled her against him without her even noticing, but then suddenly his leg decided it wasn't going to put up with much more of this. Zack's body suddenly sank several inches as the leg simply gave out, and he just barely managed to catch himself. She took his elbow and helped him back up properly, then silently walked him to his room. She assumed his silence was out of embarrassment, he had completely just put the moves on his SIC. After she had him settled into the bed, she leaned forward so that she was right in front of him. "Zack?" she whispered, making him finally look up at her. She leaned in farther and kissed him again, much differently than she had earlier that day. It didn't last exceptionally long, but it made a deep impact on both of them. She finally pulled back and smiled at him. "I guess I just wanted to say goodnight."

When Zack finally managed to whisper back, "'Night," she gave his hand a gentle squeeze and headed back upstairs. As she neared her bedroom, her head was such a mix of feelings that she wasn't sure what to do. On one hand, a part of her was happier than she'd ever been. She had feelings that weren't quite sisterly for Zack, and he seemed to feel the same way. That was good, wasn't it? On the other hand, she felt like she'd just opened Pandora's Box. What have I started?