The morning after her return to the real world Sam gradually started to feel better. Her headaches had gone and she no longer felt dizzy. Her friends had sat with her for a long time, they had talked about everything she and the others had had on their mind. It had felt so good to all of them. As Daniel and Teal'C had long gone in the middle of the night, Jack had still been with her. This time they had not hidden any of their affection toward each other; Jack had held her in his arms and she had told him everything from beginning to end, he had caressed her hair and she had kissed his neck. After all that Sam was able to smile again, but now she suddenly started to feel awkward once again...
Pete who had stayed at an on-base room the last night came up to see her. He sat down on the chair next to her bed where Jack had been sitting just some hours ago.
"Hi", he said with a relieved smile, "how are you doing?"
"I'm gonna be fine", Sam replied trying to smile back at him, "some things are still a little vague, but they'll come back soon as well."
"But you're remembering your boyfriend now, don't you?"
"How could I ever forget you?" she questioned back thinking: Yeah, how had she ever come to forget Pete? What had Baal intended with wiping him out? It was not just because he was her boyfriend and he would have kept her from becoming a loyal servant, there was more. Baal had gotten to know about her and Jack adoring each other, perhaps ... no it could not be... That the return of her most moving memories about Jack had caused a revival of their long suppressed love had never been part of any plan, it was a side-effect no one had ever considered to happen. But it had come to be and she had to deal with it now, Sam had no idea how she should ever tell Pete about her current feelings, she could not even look straight into his face, she hated Baal for things having developed that way.
Sam was so lost in her thoughts, she did not listen to Pete's words.
"...again."
"Pardon?" Sam asked. "I've just been way off with my thoughts, I'm sorry."
Her boyfriend eyed her with a slight trace of concern: "I was just hoping we'd be together again now."
"Hope so, too", Sam replied trying to quip a little, but she was not really convincing with it.
Pete furrowed his brows: "What's wrong?" he exquired eyeing his girlfriend closely.
"Nothing, really", Sam was not ready to tell him about her insecurity just now.
They talked for some more minutes and Sam could not stop feeling uncomfortable. Finally Pete left and she was still not able to stop pondering...
"Sam", later that day Janet came to tell her friend good news.
Carter looked up from the astronomy book Daniel had fetched her from the library. "Hey Jan, you look as if you have something happy to tell", she remarked.
"Yeah, so it is. I've just spoken to Sina. She told me that the Tok'ra are able to remove the remaining parts of the implant."
"That's ... great", Sam hesitated as she realized that it was not really easing the rest of her thoughts, "so they've seen it before?"
Janet nodded. "Yeah, it wasn't the first time Baal used it on somebody..." she frowned as she saw the wary expression on her opposite's face. "Hey, what's wrong with you?" she inquired.
Samantha took a deep breath and told her: "It's because... because of Pete. I can't love him like I did before and I don't know how to tell him." A tear found its way down her cheek.
Janet sat down on the bed and watched her for a moment before she tried to comfort her: "Your affection for Jack has grown strong again, hasn't it? It's hard for you and I really understand that. But you have to deal with it somehow. I don't know how I can help you exactly."
"I know", Sam sighed, "but thank you for trying. If you think of something nevertheless..."
"Wait", her friend exclaimed, "why don't you try and write him a letter?"
"You think?", Carter was not sure if writing her thoughts down would make it easier.
"Yeah, why not?" Janet encouraged her.
"Well, okay, I'll try", Sam gave her a thankful smile.
Some time later Janet return with a pad and some pens. Once again she gave Samantha an encouraging smile.
For some hours Sam tried to write the letter, she made some attempts, but she threw them all away. Finally she gave it up until Daniel came to visit her.
"Having trouble?" he asked.
"I've been trying to write Pete a letter for hours now."
"Oh", Daniel smirked a bit, "difficult task, huh?"
Sam nodded.
"Maybe I can help, I've got some experience with letters."
He sat down on the edge of her bed and Sam gave the letter another try. After some minutes of thinking she started writing again. It was easier now. Half an hour later she was finished.
"So now we're going to send it now? Mail could take some days", Carter thought out loud.
"Has Pete gone back home to Denver?"
"I think so."
"I have to go and pick some stuff up there, tomorrow morning. I could take the letter with me if you want to, then."
Sam smiled at her friend for his helpfulness: "Thank you a lot, Daniel."
He smiled back. "You're welcome, Sam.
As Pete came home he found a letter on the doorstep. He picked it up and went inside then opened the letter starting to read it. It was from Sam.
Dear Pete,
Hopefully you're feeling better now that you know things are going to be fine again. My memories have all returned by now. We've even found a way to remove the remains of the implant. So I'm going to be fine pretty soon.
There's only one thing we'll have to deal with. Some things in my life have changed now that my memories have returned. I need some time to deal with them, so you won't see me for some time. I hope you understand.
In love,
Sam
Pete lay the letter down on the kitchen table and gazed outside the window. Some day, in the near future, he thought, Samantha Carter and he would be together again as if nothing had happened.
The End
AN: Okay people, you've made it to the end. Thank you for all those positive reviews... blushes I'm really flattered about them all. Thanks for the attention you've paid on this story anyway.
I hope you'll like my next story as well. It'll be up here in some time, I think it's going to be a little romance, but not one of the usual kind...