The darkness was endless, echoing through the infinity. He was just a smart part of it, an insignificant speck of nothingness. His existence was an empty, shallow experience. "Anyone there?" he called out. There was no reply. No one cared, there was no one to give a damn. Shinji sobbed; he didn't like the darkness, he wished someone would at least brighten it a little bit for him.

He knew he didn't deserve other people's company. After all, he was just a worthless, useless kid. This blackness was his own personal hell. "Help me, someone," he muttered to himself. He didn't like other people anyway. They just expected him to do things for them, to be useful to them. He didn't want to be useful, yet it was the only way to get them to pay attention.

He started sobbing harder; he hated them all anyway! Tears of self pity were running down his face in a never ending stream. "Hate you. If you hate me, I'll hate you back," he called out.

"Pathetic! You're such a jumbled mess of conflicting desires and neuroses. Boo-hoo, what an idiot."

The voice was Asuka's. Shinji turned round to see who it was-it was Asuka in the flesh, wearing her old school uniform. Her eyes were a deep pale blue, they were beautiful even when scowling, yet Shinji couldn't bring himself to look at her. He couldn't stand her harsh judgment.

"Why do you act so pathetic? Is it some lame attempt to get some sympathy? Well it won't work, you loser. All you will get is my contempt," she told Shinji with a smirk. She seemed to take joy in belittling him.

"Please don't. Help me," he begged in reply.

"You're not listening, are you. You're such a passive wimp, but you know you can be pretty stubborn when you want to be. I've already told you: such pathetic tactics won't work with me. It also wont get you anywhere in life," Asuka continued in a cold tone. She then added, snorting, "No wonder my ego couldn't deal with you being a better pilot."

Shinji couldn't bring himself to say anything. He had no idea what to reply with anyway-after all, she was right. Asuka stood there, with her arms folded as if she was waiting for Shinji to speak. Shinji remembered how much he hated the blackness and the emptiness before, and found himself yearning for it again.

He finally spoke, asking in a whimpering manner, "Why do you hate me? Why are you being so cruel to me?"

Asuka's face softened and she sighed. "I am not Asuka. This is just a dream. I am the part of you that judges yourself too harshly. Yes, you're sometimes too hard on yourself, Shinji, but sometimes you have to tackle the root causes of your self loathing by yourself. You can't spend your whole life being passive, and doing nothing about it."

Shinji replied, "I am fucked up. I can't do anything right."

"No excuse not to try," Asuka retorted sternly. "You can either cry like a baby and do nothing, or you can be a man."

"I miss you, Asuka," Shinji said, finally looking up to face her.

"Yeah, you do, and perhaps you will never see me again. Or maybe you will, and then I will just laugh at you and belittle you, but you're not going to change anything by torturing yourself over it. Get over it already," she finished softly. Her voice wasn't harsh anymore, it had a sympathetic tone.

"I... I can't. Even if the memories of your rejection are painful, I still can't let go, they're all I've got. I got nothing without you," he explained.

Asuka sighed, rolling her eyes. "Pleeeease! Do you even realize how wretched that sounds? There are a lot of things you are running away from, things that you need to deal with. Focus on them first." She placed her hand softly on his shoulder.

"Everyone hates me," Shinji whined.

"Nah, most people don't know you exist. That's the way it is for all of us, don't be so paranoid."

Asuka then kissed Shinji on the lips softly. He blushed, not expecting that. Without warning, Asuka started getting undressed. He couldn't believe it; Asuka didn't hate him, she actually wanted him... Perhaps this dream wasn't a nightmare after all.

He could feel his excitement starting to build, when suddenly-

"Wake up, Shinji."

Shinji Ikari woke with a start. "Bleh... What time is it?" he asked, rubbing his eyes.

"8 AM," Maya replied. Shinji could tell that Maya was cooking something by the delicious smell that was coming from the kitchen. "I think our sleeping habits are too strange, so from now on we are getting up early to cook breakfast. It'll be your turn to cook tomorrow," she told Shinji.

"Just great, perfect timing," Shinji complained. If only Maya had woken him up a few minutes later.