Remus realised how stupid it was to invite Sirius to his house for the holidays when over breakfast his mother, buttering a piece of toast, casually said "I think your friend Sirius might be one of those homosexuals."
Remus choked on his cornflakes and gave his mother a dirty look but from then on the holiday was spoiled. Every touch, every look, every laugh had Remus worried in case it meant something more than just the friendly boys own adventure it was meant to be.
Finally he had to ask, just to know, and so he waited until they were camped out in the woods near his home, both of them tucked into their sleeping bags and staring at the kaki green walls of Remus's dad's old RAF tent.
"Sirius," he asked, blood pounding in his ears as he rolled over and looked closely at his friend. "Are you a… a you know, a homosexual?"
Sirius opened one eye and grinned at him.
"Of course I am." He said dreamily and then fell asleep.
Remus felt he'd misunderstood the question.
……..
The next time he asked they were propped up against the side of the village post office eating ice cream in the mid-day sun, relaxed and almost carefree.
"I want the honest answer, Sirius. Are you homosexual?"
Sirius delicately licked his ice-cream and smiled devilishly at him.
"Yes, I am." He said and stole a lick of Remus's ice cream while Remus stared at him as if Sirius had just announced he was shagging Snape.
"Are you mad?" he ventured.
"No," Sirius said, mildly disappointed. "your flavours better than mine, want to swap?"
"Do you fancy any of us?" Remus asked, his voice suddenly rather high and strained. "I mean we, James and Peter and me, spend half the time walking around naked back at school…"
"I know, it's disgusting," Sirius said with a wink. "But no, I don't fancy James or Peter."
"Oh." Remus said and dropped his ice-cream in the middle of the road.
……..
When Remus told his mother she had been right about Sirius she nodded smugly and said one could always tell.
Then Remus asked her when she'd realised he was one of those homosexuals too and had to bang her hard upon the back to stop her choking.
Surprisingly, Sirius was not invited to stay another summer.