Reno: How many Turks does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Elena: I don't know. How many?
Reno: Three! One to get the replacement, and two to drop a sector plate on the nasty Avalanche member who let it go out!
Reeve: That's not funny, Reno.
Reno: Yeah, it is!
Reeve: Think about all the people that died when you dropped that sector plate.
Reno: I know! That's what makes it funny!
Reeve: Okay, I have a joke for you. Knock knock.
Reno: Who's there?
Reeve: You're fired.
Reno: I don't get it.
Heidegger: Gya ha ha ha! I do!
Reno: ...
Reeve: Right. Since I've managed to get Reno speechless, I think now's the perfect time to say that Tyramir doesn't own Final Fantasy.
Reno: Wait, I have a come back! YOUR MOM, BUDDY!
Reeve: Right. Bet you're proud of that one. On with the story.
Chapter Fourteen
Spirit Energy
The more Cloud looked at Doctor Hargun, the more he realized that the face was familiar, but not quite right. The wrinkles and white hair were definitely out of place, and there was something about the facial structure... but the eyes. Cloud just couldn't get over how familiar the eyes were.
Hargun was busying himself over Cid, who had taken an instant dislike to the old man. He'd flinch whenever the doctor would come near, and mutter about 'man scientists' and 'nutjob professors' and what a 'numbskull' Cloud was for having brought the 'whacko crackpot' anywhere near him. Several times during the doctor's examination, which combined both an odd assortment of scanners and Materia, Cid demanded a cigarette, and every time he'd try to reach one from the small table near him, the doctor would firmly slap his hand away.
Barret sat on a chair nearby, watching, a worried look on his face. Red XIII followed Hargun around, looking at his scanners and Materia whenever he set them aside. Occassionally the word 'fascinating' would issue from him.
A clucking noise came from Hargun, and finally he turned from the injured pilot and beckoned Cloud aside. Barret and Red XIII both immediately went to join in.
"How is he?" Cloud asked.
"His spinal column is fractured in several key points. There is also a small piece of metal lodged into one of the vertebrae. That's what's causing most of the trouble. Normally, enough work with a Cure Materia would eventually heal him fully, but that shard is preventing it. Healing him is actually hurting him, since all it's doing is fusing the shard into his spine."
"Well, shit," Barret swore. "What can we do, doc?"
"Surgery. The procedure will take a few hours, but unfortunately, he won't survive it. I can get the shard out, but it would kill him. As it is, he'll survive, but never walk again. There is one way I can do it, though."
"What's that?" Cloud asked.
"If I had a large and pure enough dose of Mako energy, I could infuse him with it. It would be like a temporary boost in his system's strength, almost as if he were a member of Soldier. For a brief period he'll be the same as you, Cloud, but it won't be permanent. It would allow his system to survive the surgery. Unfortauntely, to get this, I'll have to leave the relative protection of Kalm in order to get it. Mideel, I believe. Or maybe the Northern Crater."
Cloud nodded. "Understood. I'll go with you."
"Me, too," Barret said.
"Sorry, Barret, but Kalm needs you right now. Someone will have to head up the police force in my absence."
"Ah hell, Red can do that."
The feline nodded. "I can easily lead a pack of humans on the hunt. It will also give me additional resources in the location of Rude and Tifa."
"All right." Cloud said, "You two better get ready then. It might take some pretty good convincing on your part to let Kalm's mayor agree to letting a giant cat lead the police force."
An ugly smile crawled onto Barret's face. "Shit, if he's got any problems with my pal Nanaki here, I'll just go right upside his head. Oh right. Hey, Red? Can you watch over Marlene for me while I'm gone?"
"I would be happy to. She knows exactly where to scratch me behind my ears. A most agreeable human."
"Ah, thanks, Red."
Cloud watched as the two left the tent, then turned to face Hargun. The man had a very self-satisfied look on his face, as if he had just gotten somethat that he really wanted.
"May I ask you a personal question, doctor?"
"Yes? What is it?"
It was something that had defined his life for almost seven years. He was afraid to know the answer, but at the same time, needed it. "Why did you flunk me out of Soldier?"
"Excuse me?"
"You said you were the one who flunked people out, chose who wasn't worthy of it. Why did I wash out?"
"Oh. That. Well, my boy, the answer is simple. You scored high on both the physical and mental tests, as well as the spiritual test in how you would react to a large dose of Mako. You had the potential to be incredibly strong, you were smart enough to be able to devise brilliant tactics when the situation called for it, and your potential for Materia use was astounding. But you had one drawback.
"Somewhere in your mind, you had the belief that you weren't strong enough. So you held yourself back. The belief that you were weak permeated your mind. We couldn't break you of it. So while you scored high in all other areas, you completely and utterly failed the psych evaluation."
The words struck Cloud like a blow. He had always thought he had failed because he was weak. But it had just been the thought ... The bitter irony of it almost made him laugh.
"Thank you, doctor. You've been a great help. I just need to talk to Cid and then we'll be on our way."
Hargun nodded, then turned and walked away.
Cloud slowly approached Cid's bedside. The old pilot looked in much better shape than he had a few days ago when Cloud had first brought him in. He almost looked healthy.
"Godamn crackpot," Cid muttered. "Whoever heard of mixin' science with that magic crap?"
"Mako reactors use both. You seem to trust those."
"But those are killin' the planet. See what magic and science combined gets us? A dyin' planet, that's what!"
"But the Lifestream repaired most of that damage when it destroyed Meteor."
The pilot grunted. "Think this'll really work?"
"Hargun seems to know what he's talking about. We just need to stop by Mideel to pick up some supplies."
"I know, I heard. Just because my legs don't work doesn't mean I've gone deaf. Take the Tiny Bronco."
"What?"
"Those idiot pilots of mine found it and went and restored it without me. You're not a bad pilot, kid, so I'll trust you with it for now. Just get it back to me in one piece."
"I will, Cid." He turned away.
"Wait, Cloud. One more thing."
He turned back to Cid, who had a light of mischief in his eyes. "What's that?"
"Don't be afraid to rough it up a little. I'll need an excuse to fix up the mistakes those pinheads probably made of my plane."
Cloud laughed and walked away.
Elena: I don't know. How many?
Reno: Three! One to get the replacement, and two to drop a sector plate on the nasty Avalanche member who let it go out!
Reeve: That's not funny, Reno.
Reno: Yeah, it is!
Reeve: Think about all the people that died when you dropped that sector plate.
Reno: I know! That's what makes it funny!
Reeve: Okay, I have a joke for you. Knock knock.
Reno: Who's there?
Reeve: You're fired.
Reno: I don't get it.
Heidegger: Gya ha ha ha! I do!
Reno: ...
Reeve: Right. Since I've managed to get Reno speechless, I think now's the perfect time to say that Tyramir doesn't own Final Fantasy.
Reno: Wait, I have a come back! YOUR MOM, BUDDY!
Reeve: Right. Bet you're proud of that one. On with the story.
Chapter Fourteen
Spirit Energy
The more Cloud looked at Doctor Hargun, the more he realized that the face was familiar, but not quite right. The wrinkles and white hair were definitely out of place, and there was something about the facial structure... but the eyes. Cloud just couldn't get over how familiar the eyes were.
Hargun was busying himself over Cid, who had taken an instant dislike to the old man. He'd flinch whenever the doctor would come near, and mutter about 'man scientists' and 'nutjob professors' and what a 'numbskull' Cloud was for having brought the 'whacko crackpot' anywhere near him. Several times during the doctor's examination, which combined both an odd assortment of scanners and Materia, Cid demanded a cigarette, and every time he'd try to reach one from the small table near him, the doctor would firmly slap his hand away.
Barret sat on a chair nearby, watching, a worried look on his face. Red XIII followed Hargun around, looking at his scanners and Materia whenever he set them aside. Occassionally the word 'fascinating' would issue from him.
A clucking noise came from Hargun, and finally he turned from the injured pilot and beckoned Cloud aside. Barret and Red XIII both immediately went to join in.
"How is he?" Cloud asked.
"His spinal column is fractured in several key points. There is also a small piece of metal lodged into one of the vertebrae. That's what's causing most of the trouble. Normally, enough work with a Cure Materia would eventually heal him fully, but that shard is preventing it. Healing him is actually hurting him, since all it's doing is fusing the shard into his spine."
"Well, shit," Barret swore. "What can we do, doc?"
"Surgery. The procedure will take a few hours, but unfortunately, he won't survive it. I can get the shard out, but it would kill him. As it is, he'll survive, but never walk again. There is one way I can do it, though."
"What's that?" Cloud asked.
"If I had a large and pure enough dose of Mako energy, I could infuse him with it. It would be like a temporary boost in his system's strength, almost as if he were a member of Soldier. For a brief period he'll be the same as you, Cloud, but it won't be permanent. It would allow his system to survive the surgery. Unfortauntely, to get this, I'll have to leave the relative protection of Kalm in order to get it. Mideel, I believe. Or maybe the Northern Crater."
Cloud nodded. "Understood. I'll go with you."
"Me, too," Barret said.
"Sorry, Barret, but Kalm needs you right now. Someone will have to head up the police force in my absence."
"Ah hell, Red can do that."
The feline nodded. "I can easily lead a pack of humans on the hunt. It will also give me additional resources in the location of Rude and Tifa."
"All right." Cloud said, "You two better get ready then. It might take some pretty good convincing on your part to let Kalm's mayor agree to letting a giant cat lead the police force."
An ugly smile crawled onto Barret's face. "Shit, if he's got any problems with my pal Nanaki here, I'll just go right upside his head. Oh right. Hey, Red? Can you watch over Marlene for me while I'm gone?"
"I would be happy to. She knows exactly where to scratch me behind my ears. A most agreeable human."
"Ah, thanks, Red."
Cloud watched as the two left the tent, then turned to face Hargun. The man had a very self-satisfied look on his face, as if he had just gotten somethat that he really wanted.
"May I ask you a personal question, doctor?"
"Yes? What is it?"
It was something that had defined his life for almost seven years. He was afraid to know the answer, but at the same time, needed it. "Why did you flunk me out of Soldier?"
"Excuse me?"
"You said you were the one who flunked people out, chose who wasn't worthy of it. Why did I wash out?"
"Oh. That. Well, my boy, the answer is simple. You scored high on both the physical and mental tests, as well as the spiritual test in how you would react to a large dose of Mako. You had the potential to be incredibly strong, you were smart enough to be able to devise brilliant tactics when the situation called for it, and your potential for Materia use was astounding. But you had one drawback.
"Somewhere in your mind, you had the belief that you weren't strong enough. So you held yourself back. The belief that you were weak permeated your mind. We couldn't break you of it. So while you scored high in all other areas, you completely and utterly failed the psych evaluation."
The words struck Cloud like a blow. He had always thought he had failed because he was weak. But it had just been the thought ... The bitter irony of it almost made him laugh.
"Thank you, doctor. You've been a great help. I just need to talk to Cid and then we'll be on our way."
Hargun nodded, then turned and walked away.
Cloud slowly approached Cid's bedside. The old pilot looked in much better shape than he had a few days ago when Cloud had first brought him in. He almost looked healthy.
"Godamn crackpot," Cid muttered. "Whoever heard of mixin' science with that magic crap?"
"Mako reactors use both. You seem to trust those."
"But those are killin' the planet. See what magic and science combined gets us? A dyin' planet, that's what!"
"But the Lifestream repaired most of that damage when it destroyed Meteor."
The pilot grunted. "Think this'll really work?"
"Hargun seems to know what he's talking about. We just need to stop by Mideel to pick up some supplies."
"I know, I heard. Just because my legs don't work doesn't mean I've gone deaf. Take the Tiny Bronco."
"What?"
"Those idiot pilots of mine found it and went and restored it without me. You're not a bad pilot, kid, so I'll trust you with it for now. Just get it back to me in one piece."
"I will, Cid." He turned away.
"Wait, Cloud. One more thing."
He turned back to Cid, who had a light of mischief in his eyes. "What's that?"
"Don't be afraid to rough it up a little. I'll need an excuse to fix up the mistakes those pinheads probably made of my plane."
Cloud laughed and walked away.