[Disclaimer: I don't own Teen Titians, but of course you knew that.]
Raven's p.o.v.
"Azarath Metrion Zinthos…" My chants rang out all night. Long into the morning hours as well. I still couldn't get as deep as I was before. I couldn't get back into my mind as well now.
Still something changed in me today. I opened an eye to spot the time. Correction-yesterday. It was already six in the morning. That thing that Jinx hit me with wasn't just a curse that didn't work. I think she messed with my emotions. Something Slade might have picked up on.
He was probably counting on it. He might have known how unstable my powers were. Making an emotion stronger than usual would surely make me act on it, or loose control. I'd spent the whole night putting together those thoughts. It was aggravating. Since the weird glitch last night I couldn't see my powers acting any differently. Whatever emotion was messed with wasn't in play right now.
That ruled out a few. However I still hadn't experienced happiness. Anger yesterday at Beast Boy. But nothing happened at that time. Only when Robin grabbed my hand did my powers fluke out.
I held my gloved hand in front of me. As if wishing it would just speak out. What was that emotion? I ran through them in my head.
Sadness, anger, happiness, jealousy, bravery, fear, intelligence….
There was a few more that rarely ever made an appearance that I didn't count on. Still there was something missing. Some emotion I wasn't counting…
I got up from my bed walking over to the mirror. I took a quick glance. You couldn't tell I hadn't slept. My meditation and powers had kept that away. I did feel refreshed anyway. Leaving my hood down I decided to get something to drink.
My door quietly swished open and I headed toward the kitchen. It was still a little dark in the tower and quiet spread evenly through it. It was a shame that soon enough the tower would be filled with Beast Boy and Cyborg constant blubbering's.
I walked into the kitchen and got out some of my herbal tea. Like every day I got a little quiet to drink my tea before the rest began to wake up. I poured steamy water into my mug and added a tea bag.
I watched with a detached amusement as the brown swirled mixing with the water. My face never left the name mono way as the tea mixed. Finally I brought it to my lips and took a long sip.
"Good morning Robin," I greeted as our leader slinking into the kitchen. He looked the same as he did every day.
"Your up early," He noted sitting down at the table with me.
"You are as well," It was always better to shoot a conversation back at the other person. That way they inadvertently ended up talking about them, instead of prying on you. Robin was never fooled.
"Well?" He prompted. We both knew what he was talking about; playing anything but the truth was useless.
"Jinx hit me with a spell yesterday. It must have amplified an emotion, Slade probably realized what trouble that would cause."
"What emotion?"
"I don't know, so far the only time I must have felt it was yesterday,"
That stopped the conversation. We both were now thinking. What emotion could it possibly have been. I watched Robin's face as his eyes were on the table. His mouth moved in just the slightest frown that only I would have been able to catch.
I took a sip of my tea feeling my powers flair. I shouldn't worry Robin he has more problems. After all I had handled ever other problem by myself, why not this one too?
"I'm going to read," I explained and stood up.
"But I-"
"No Robin, this is my problem, I can handle it."
Without waiting for a reply I left the room and plopped myself down on the far end of the living room. I conjured a book to me and opened it to read. An Edgar Allen Poe story looked back at me. I began to read and let all thoughts slip away.
-----------
"Friend Raven?" Starfire floated up just as I finished my book. I closed it and it surrounded in black returning itself.
She had her hands clasped waiting expectantly.
"Can I acquire your help dear friend?" Her eyes glowed big as she cheerily smiled at me in hope. Inwardly I groaned and made just the slightest nod.
"I wish to know how to get Robin back." She had seated herself next to me smiling.
"Get him back?" I raised an eyebrow looking at the young Tamaranian.
"Yes, he seems to not like me anymore." I almost choked. She girl was just now noticing Robin wasn't responding to her flattery the same. How some people, even aliens could be so naive was beyond my comprehension. It was pointless to want affectionate feelings in the first place.
Emotions were nothing but trouble. Trouble that no one needed.
I heard the crack of a light bulb bust. I quickly looked across the room, everyone was looking at a lamp that was surrounded in black energy, and the light bulb was shattered on the floor.
How had my power gotten out without my noticing? I tugged it back quickly as the Titians in the living room gave me curious glances.
"Starfire I think it's really a lost cause," I answered quicker than usual. She alien girl looked shattered. Excusing myself quickly I headed for my room. More meditation time was necessary. Robin had been in the kitchen fixing breakfast at the time, but he must have noticed the shattered glass.
I didn't need more questions and him digging.
I heard a discussion start as I left the room. Beast Boy and Cyborg would be heard asking Starfire what had happened. I heard Robin's voice ask the guys what happened. I closed my bedroom door.
I sat down on my bed and brought back the memories. My conversation with Starfire. She was asking about help with getting Robin. She loved him, almost everyone knew.
Then my mind wandered. I started thinking how useless affections for someone else were-
I opened my eyes. My powers had reached out again. I tugged hard and shoved them back inside. The random objects dropped to the floor. I cared not right now to pick them up.
Had I just figured out the emotion? Was I even capable of having that emotion?
Banging came at my door.
"Friend Raven, what is wrong?" Starfire's muffled voice was on the other side of the door.
"Rae, open up." That was Robin's voice.
Azarath, Metrion Zinthos…
It wasn't working. I was watching my black powers move toward the door. No, I wouldn't let them in.
"Azarath Metrion Zinthos," I chanted aloud. They slowed. I concentrated. I needed to clear my mind. I needed to forget. Forget my friends were there. I fell back on my bed and closed my eyes.
I was getting tired. All my energy was being used up now. It was impossible battling myself. I pulled my cape close to me. I suddenly felt cold. I was still tugging at the threads of power that were mingling outside my body.
I couldn't be weak. This was stupid. Emotions couldn't control me. I couldn't let them. I felt something new move around in my head. It was that emotion.
I opened my eyes and gave a last fast pull toward me. That worked. The tendrils stopped just as they had turned the doorknob. My door slid open a little. They rushed back at me. Absorbing them again I didn't feel any less tired, if anything I felt more. My eyes closed and an unhappy sleep met me.
The last I heard was the sliding of a particular door I knew all too well.
[Umm I hope the pace is good So what do you all think?? Yes I changed the title, it just bugged me.
If you don't like the coupling, well you shouldn't have made it to ch 2 XD]
-Dragonslayer527