Disclaimer: I don't own the characters.
Chapter 11- Day of Pranks
Lily was sitting alone at the picnic table, leaning her head against her right hand. James hadn't tried to talk to her for the past two days because she still seemed upset about the incident. James took a deep breath before taking the plunge and sitting next to Lily. "Hey Evans," James said casually trying to be friendly.
Lily turned, leaning against her left and instead. "Come on Lily," he said. "It was all meant in fun," James said wishing that he hadn't been so competitive.
"I'd like to hear you say fun when you're throwing up over the side of a mattress," Lily said before taking a bite of her sandwich.
"I'm sorry, I really am," James said. "Come on, let me take you out again tonight and I'll make it up to you," James suggested suavely.
"While you're planning your next prank? Fat chance!" Lily stood and left the table.
James almost just left her alone, but decided he wanted to solve this. A couple minutes after Lily had left James stormed after her. "Where are you going?" Sirius asked as James passed him and Remus.
"To get a girlfriend," James said surely.
James noticed was Lily sitting on her bed writing in some sort of journal. "Can I help you?" she asked angrily.
"Yes," James said. He then strode to her bed, sat on the edge, grabbed her by the shoulders and pulled her lips to his fiercely. Lily tried to pull away at first, but James just held on, not letting her leave the moment.
"James Michael Potter!" Kyla said coming into the room from the small bathroom. James pulled away quickly. "What do you think you're doing?" Kyla asked.
"I'm trying to woo Lily," James said boldly.
"How about letting her breath?" Kyla suggested. Lily was redder than her hair at this point, not liking the conversation, and had pulled her diary close to her.
"I... I was just trying to-"
"How about trying to be nice instead of stranding her on a mattress in the middle of the lake?" Kyla said, putting her hands on her hips.
James looked from his mum to Lily and back again. "Fine," James said standing up and storming from the cabin in the same way he stormed into it.
"I don't know where that boy gets his nerve," Kyla said, going to her bed and folding up one of her shirts.
July 26, 1979
Dear Diary,
James is the biggest egotistical jerk I've ever met. He thinks he can just come up to me, call me by my last name, which I've asked him not to do, and apologize for what he did? No way is that going to make up for something like that. He's rude, obnoxious, inconsiderate and...
A good kisser.
Two days later
A beeping went off in Cabin four about an hour after the sun had risen. "GeupJaaame," Sirius mumbled. It was James's turn to take the first shower, since they now had enough water for three or four a week.
James sat up on the edge of his bed and moved his hand around the night stand until he found his glasses. When he could see again, James found his wand and stopped the alarm that Michael had arranged.
James walked lazily into the shower area, took off his clothes and glasses and started the shower. He had washed his hair and was just lathering the soap on his body when he felt something at his feet. James put the soap aside, put his glasses on and looked down at his feet.
The other guys in the cabin were woken by a loud screaming, and the first sight their eyes saw was a naked James running out of his shower, trying to get a towel around his lower half, and looking as though he was doing a jig while trying to kick a snake off of his leg while it was crawling further up. The guys were all trying to keep their distance and try to help at the same time.
"What's wrong?" Lily said when she opened the door. Both Lily and James froze, then turned away. For a brief moment James forgot about the snake crawling up toward his thigh to wrap the towel around him. Lily had found herself looking at a little spot of grass just beyond Cabin four and decided not to attempt turning back.
Kyla came in just after Lily, and having missed the little show, didn't worry about what James was more frantic with now. She pulled out her wand and got rid of the snake quickly... just as they had planned.
"Thanks Mum," James said, sitting back on his bed even though he had suds all over him still.
"Remember that before you prank us again," Kyla said.
"You did that?" Michael asked realizing her meaning behind that. James was just so glad it was over he didn't care. "You know James is terrified of snakes," Michael accused.
"And you knew Lily gets sea sick," Kyla pointed out. Lily was still standing outside the door of Cabin Four. James and Lily's eyes met once, but they both looked away quickly.
"Kyla, what if James had been bit?"
"It was a Grass Snake, even if he had been bit, which is highly unlikely, it's not poisonous," Kyla argued.
"It's your son!" Michael said.
"This coming from the man who tried to teach James to skateboard down the Grand Canyon when he was eight!" Kyla shouted back in his face.
"I was just trying to teach the boy some character and fearlessness," Michael defended.
"So was I," Kyla retorted, then turned on her heel to return to the girls' cabin.
"I," Lily said, looking at the guys and back to Kyla. "I'm just going to... to," Lily pointed toward her own cabin then followed Kyla into it.
"Well, I'm sorry it had to happen to you, but I suppose if that's the best they could come up with then it must be pretty much over," Sirius said laying back on his bed.
"Yeah, thank Merlin for that one," Michael said, grabbing his towel and wand, just in case there were any more critters waiting for him.
Lily and Kyla were getting ready for the day in their cabin. "I didn't expect that," Lily admitted to Kyla about the scene she had witnessed earlier.
"I'm sure James didn't mind too much about that, though I have to apologize that you had to see anything," Kyla said. "I probably should have gone in first."
"I didn't see much, I think we both turned away so fast," Lily said, not believing she was talking to James's mum about this.
"You ready for the rest of today?"
"As long as I don't have to go through that again," Lily said referring to the embarrassing moment of that morning.
Sirius had been saving for quite some time for a flying motorbike he had seen being sold by a wizard. Just after they had finished this last year of school he finally had enough to purchase the vehicle. Sirius had been extremely disappointed when he found out he couldn't bring it camping, but Kyla had let him put it in the storage shed.
Michael and Remus had already left for breakfast, but James was still a bit shaken up and it took a bit of encouragement for him to get back into the shower to finish rinsing off. This time, though, he wore a pair of swim trunks in case he had to leave the shower again.
They entered the dining hall and were piling food onto their plates when James noticed a lot of people gathered around a small light for some reason. James nudged Sirius, "what do you think is going on?"
"I don't know," Sirius said. "Oy! Remus," he shouted, seeing his friend in the crowd.
Remus looked away from the group and walked nervously over to the other Marauders. "Hey guys," he tried to make things sound very casual.
"Hey Moony, what's the big fuss over there?" James asked, excited to see that there were hash browns this morning.
"We're listening to the WWN," Remus said with a shrug.
"No way, did they sneak that in here?" Sirius asked, ignoring the fact that they hadn't finished going through the breakfast line. James jumped ahead, got some hash browns and followed behind Remus who looked tentative for some reason.
"With plates that say 'BLACK' and a Weird Sister sticker just above. In the high speed chase it has been what the Muggles call totaled, meaning completely destroyed beyond all recognition," the WWN reporter said. Sirius had frozen and looked close to tears. "The perpetrator has been taken in by the Ministry for several accounts of breaking the Muggle secrecy laws, and for theft. It will be very difficult for the owner of the vehicle to get the money back for the motorbike, though we are told an item like this is practically irreplaceable."
"It is irreplaceable Jackass!" Sirius said not being able to control himself.
"Sirius, don't go over board," Michael said.
"I saved for five years and you don't want me to go overboard?!" Sirius said, dropping his tray leaving scrambled eggs and bacon on the mess hall floor.
"Come on, Padfoot, I'm sure it'll be okay, maybe they can fix it," James tried to comfort.
"Didn't you hear? It's toppled!"
"Totaled," Remus corrected.
"Whatever!" Sirius shouted back.
Michael was about to attempt calming Sirius when he saw Lily, Kyla and Arthur Weasley's wife laughing over something, and looking in their direction every so often. "Come here," Michael said, grabbing Sirius's arm, perhaps more harshly than he had meant to, and led him over to where the women sat laughing. "Tell him his motorbike is safe," Michael said.
"Why?" Kyla asked.
"Very funny, Kyla, you got us now tell him please," Michael said.
Kyla turned her attention to the seventeen year old whose eyes were starting to well up with tears. "You're motorbike is fine, we made it seem like the WWN," she said very plainly then looked back to Michael.
Sirius went to the other side of the table and hugged Kyla tightly, "Thank Godric," he said.
"You can let me go," Kyla said.
"And thank you," Sirius said, giving Lily her turn, only this time he dipped her back from the bench and laid a kiss on her.
"Hey, hey!" James said before Sirius came to his senses.
Lily turned bright red for the umpteenth time this morning and took a drink of water.
"Okay, that's enough," Michael said.
"Can't take the heat?" Kyla asked.
"No, it's just enough," Michael said. "Let's call it a truce."
"Fine, but we're going to talk about some things first," Kyla said referring to the two of them as adults.
"Fine," Michael said, then walked off.
James, Remus and Sirius still stood there. James was the first to sit down a little ways from the girls but close enough that hopefully they could converse some. "Oh, you got the hash browns?" Molly stated more than asked James.
"Yeah they're my favorite," James said cheerfully.
"Oh dear, I don't know if that's a good idea," Molly said, before turning back to her own food.
James pushed his plate aside and started to pout.
Around ten o'clock Michael and Kyla made their way out into the woods, taking a stroll to discuss the past few weeks, and especially the last prank pulled. "You're probably right, we may have gone a bit far with that one, but what about making us clean up the mess around the campsite?"
"You have always said you wanted me to lighten up about James getting in trouble with pranks at school, well here it is: I've lightened up," Kyla said.
"That's not what I meant," Michael retorted.
"Of course you didn't, you'd rather me go prank someone with the last name of Malfoy or one of Sirius's relatives."
"That would be a good start," Michael said.
"You know by treating them the way you do it sometimes only makes it worse. I'm not going to condone what they believe, but you're just stooping to their level."
"I just don't think you should be-"
"Doing anything to you?"
"Well yeah."
"Not going to happen," Kyla said. They got to where a large tree was, and she conjured stones to make a staircase and they both climbed up to the top. "And what is with the crap you're teaching the boys about how to treat a girl? I swear you give guys a bad name sometimes."
"You helped Lily cheat in the poker game!"
"You encouraged them to play strip poker with her!"
"And? They just wanted their award back!"
"The award she earned fair this year! I wish Lily would have made them give her more that night," Kyla added.
"Okay, we need to just call it to an end," Michael said taking a deep breath. "Kyla, I can't stand to be on these terms with you."
Kyla sighed and thought. "Neither can I."
"Do you realize that we haven't kissed for almost three weeks?"
"James has been beating you out. Did you hear what he did yesterday?" Kyla asked in more of a kind and fun tone.
"Sirius and Remus were talking about it, so I overheard some," Michael said. "That sounds familiar doesn't it?"
"You mean the way you tried to kiss me in my third year," Kyla asked. "You also remember you ended up with your lips on the wall right?"
"Right, I try to forget that part," Michael said, running his fingers through Kyla's hair. "Let's let it all go, okay?"
"I don't know," Kyla said, pursing her lips, but they soon left that position when Michael pulled her close and kissed his wife. They kissed for quite a while until Kyla pulled away with Michael's wand in her hands. "Sorry not this time," Kyla said.
"What?" Michael asked, his eyes going wide.
"We have one more thing up our sleeves," Kyla said, starting to descend the stairs she had made. Michael tried to follow but was stopped by some sort of invisible shield.
"Kyla!" he shouted.
"I love you honey, but I better get going," she said. "Lily and I were going to go ride the horses today."
"Kyla give me back my wand!" Michael tried to demand from his hopeless situation.
"I think I'll wait for a while. See you at dinner?" she asked while walking away, but then stopped and looked behind her shoulder, "or maybe not."
"KYLA!"
Remus leaned back against a large oak tree, reading a book entitled 'Werewolves: the Monsters of the Modern World' which was actually written by a Muggle. He was having a good laugh over some of the specifics when Lily approached him. "Hey Remus," she said sitting down next to him and handing him his Hogwarts letter that had just arrived.
"Thanks," he said, hoping this wasn't filled with some sort of powder or something. He began to open the edges when Lily stopped him.
"I just wanted to tell you first that James got Head Boy, and I know that you wanted it, but don't be upset or angry okay?"
It took Remus a second to catch up the pace of Lily's explanation. "Right, James Head Boy," Remus said, figuring this is what they had thought to pull on him to settle the score.
"No really," Lily said. "I'm sure Dumbledore has his reasons, and it isn't as if you don't have enough on your shoulders right now," Lily started talking fast again.
Remus just rolled his eyes and started opening his envelope. Right… James Potter… Head Boy. That's almost as funny as Peter being top in the class. Remus looked through the envelope as Lily stood and went back toward the main group. He saw the new book list, a note on the first day of school, little reminders… but no Head Boy letter or Badge. Must be a part of their plan, Remus thought. Remus decided, though, that he wouldn't ask about them. That would just play into their hands, so he went to join the rest of the group.
"Have you guys ever heard of the 'Liter Beater'?" Lily asked leaning in a bit more.
"No," Sirius said.
"Basically it is almost inhumanly possible for anyone to drink more than three and a half liters in an hour," Lily said.
"And?" Remus asked, slightly interested. He had read somewhere that Werewolves held an abnormally large amount of fluid at once.
"Well, it's just to see if anyone can," Lily said, opening back up her magazine.
"I'll try it," Remus said, having the knowledge that he could probably do what the other two could not.
"Are you crazy?" James asked, pulling Remus aside by his upper arm. "Think, Remus, they've managed to get us all, except you."
"They've already gotten me, and don't you think I'd know if they were up to something," Remus said confidently, which was surprisingly normal in this kind of scenario. Remus only did these kinds of dares when it was a sure thing, or when James and Sirius talked him into it.
"Fine," James said, shrugging. "What did they do to you, by the way?"
"I'll tell you later," Remus said. "Hey Lily," he said going back toward the picnic table.
"What?" Lily asked looking up from whatever article she was reading. Sirius was disappointed when she closed it, since he had been standing behind her, staring at the models.
"I'm going to become a Liter Beater," Remus said.
"Are you sure? If you can't do it no one will blame you," Lily said, and she said just right. There was no better way to get Remus to do something than to suggest he couldn't do it.
"Yeah, I'm sure," Remus said.
"All right," Lily said, putting down the magazine which was soon picked up by Sirius. "I'll go get some milk from the kitchens."
As Lily fulfilled that task the boys sat around preparing for the task at hand. "Take it slow, Moony, and pace yourself," Sirius advised.
"And stop if you can't take it," James said.
"I can take it just fine," Remus said. "Trust me, I have my wolf instincts about this," he added. Both the other boys rolled their eyes at this.
Lily came back with two 2-liter jugs of milk. "All right whenever you're ready," she said.
Remus picked one of the jugs up took a deep breath and started drinking. Sirius and James sat around whooping and cheering him on. Lily smiled in a way that Remus took as encouraging. It was nearly fifteen minutes and two liters later when it hit, and it hit hard. Remus put the jug down and held his stomach.
"Are you okay mate?" Sirius asked, putting a hand on Remus's back. Remus, however, pushed Sirius's hand away and ran to the closest out house.
James and Sirius stared as Remus ran, but Lily sat on her side of the table laughing hysterically. "What did you do?" James asked in awe.
Lily couldn't stop laughing but pulled out an empty bottle of laxative and put it on top of the table. Sirius's eyes got wide as he picked it up, "what is it?"
"I know what that is," James said, his eyes wider than Sirius's for the pure fact that he understood. "My mum gave me some one time when… when," James looked over at Lily who had started a whole new fit of laughter waiting for James to tell his embarrassing story, but instead James leaned toward Sirius and told him.
"Bloody Hell!" Sirius said, looking toward the out house.
Lily finished laughing, wiping tears from her eyes, and sighed before looking at her watch. "I better get going. Your mum and I are going horse back riding," Lily said, then gingerly stood up and made her way toward the stables.
Sirius and James both went to the out house Remus had gotten to. "How are you?" Sirius asked, then bit his bottom lip hoping he had said the right thing. The only response they got was a loud groan.
It was nearly ten minutes before Remus came back out. They made their way back to Cabin Four, the final stretch being a sprint for Remus. When all three of them were in their cabin, they started to discuss the treachery of that day. "Well at least they only got each of you once," Remus said bitterly.
"What do you mean?" Sirius asked.
"I mean, first they hide my Head Boy badge and then-"
"Yours?" James interrupted.
"Yes," Remus said. "She tried to trick me into believing that you got Head Boy instead of me."
"Uh," James said uncomfortably. "I did."
"WHAT?" Remus screamed. "No, they just put it in your letter, read the name at the top."
James got the letter out of his suitcase. "Dear Mr. Potter… see?" James said pointing out the salutations.
"No way," Remus muttered to himself while sitting on the edge of the nearest bed. This was just too much for him, first the sudden bowel movements, and now a punch right in the stomach, or was that to his pride? Either way Remus couldn't believe it.
"Sorry mate, but you're still Prefect right?" James said. "I mean, it's not like I really wanted it, they just sent me the letter. Maybe it was a mistake," James suggested.
"No," Remus said, handing James the letter back. "You're Head Boy, congratulations." Remus forced a smile and tried his best to be happy for his friend.
"Thanks," James said, reciprocating the smile. James looked at his watch then. "If Mum and Lily are horse back riding, shouldn't Dad be back by now?"
The boys all looked at each other, then, with minds in unison, made a mad dash for the door.
A/N: Okay, this chapter is way long, so I hope you all like it! This one took forever because it had to be as good as the last one, so I took the approach that they were all getting their own individual act of revenge upon their heads (muahahahaha).
Please Review if you haven't, and if you have thank you, because it really encourages me to keep going.
Thank you:
The-eater-of-words: Thank you! I hope you read the one before it, because I could just imagine your confusion otherwise. I appreciate that you like it so much!
Hahaanonymoushaha: Your sister need to stuff it… did I say that??? =) Thank you for reading them and I hope you like this chapter.
Dafalcon: More kissing here! I love how James handles himself with the whole situation, I think he's really funny.
Seed-of-Flame: Yes we shall! It's not like the girls haven't done their fair share, but I think it's funny that Arthur came up with the last one. This time (fyi) he made the suggestion to make individual revenge situations instead of one big one. I think it's funny that Molly makes him help the girls.
Misakichi1: Long enough for you? I know the chapters in my comedies tend to be really short, more like little antidotes instead of a big plot story. Hope you like this chapter.
Space-Pirate10: No!!! NOT MOLLY WEASLEY!!! Hehehe I know the last one was a bit short, but I hope I've made up for it here.
Dobbyfan18: Here's something to wade through all on its own!
Firewalker32: Thank you!
Mell Minamoto: After all the mean things the girls did this time, I'm pretty sure they're even. I mean, come on… laxative? HEHE, I know someone who actually did that to a friend of hers (but it's actually called the 'Gallon Challenge' but I don't like to make it soooo obvious that I'm an American), and they did it as a joke, but it turned really bad, and they felt sooooo bad for doing it after.
Morgan Riordan: Get the boys back!!! Of course!!! This is basically going to be even, until the very end, and if you think about it the first thing the boys did was stick the girls with the bad cabin. Remember here too, that the boys still don't have their shoes. Hehehe!
Megan: Thank you for that Ron comment!
Writegirl709: It's hard… it's very VERY hard. Hence why it takes me so long to post on this one. Each time I have to come up with something that was better than the last, and this time I had to come up with four things that were better.
JamieBell: You read my mind about the snakes thing. That one was really the only one I had planned. The rest I had to rack my brain until it hurt. I've thought of something really funny though for the next chapter! You haven't reviewed for a while, and I'm starting to wonder if something's wrong or if you just haven't had time. Either way I understand, but I really hope it's the later of the two!
Mochalattee: I really did update as soon as I could, even if id did take me a while. I'll try to do so again asap, but I make no promises to when that will occur.
Storywritter10791: Of course Molly knows how to handle Arthur… you don't train a man in just one day… or week. It takes persistence and knowledge. Just kidding! I love the way Molly always handles Arthur, I think it's funny and I just love Arthur all the more for dealing with it. One of my favorite moment in OOtP is when Molly is yelling at Arthur at Mungo's for trying to use stitches.