Title: "To Choose Whatever Heaven Grants…"

Author: Nefertili

Fandom: Lord of the Rings

Pairing(s): none

Rating: PG13

Genre(s): Angst, AU

Warning(s): No slash this time…it is replaced by bits and pieces of violence and insults in the other chapters.

Summary: A glimpse on Haldir's past, and what he has long hidden from the world in his face of indifference.

Author's Notes: Cry, cry I'm really, really sorry for the sad theme of this story. I was very sad and lonely as well when I started this, but don't worry. I plan on writing a sequel for it, and it's a lot, lot happier than this latter!

Haldir opened his eyes after a long moment of going through his pained past. The sun had risen, and once more, the Golden Wood hummed to life. Just then, he heard voices calling out to him from below. Haldir crouched and leaped down the mallorn with no effort at all, taking his brothers by surprise.

"Ai, Haldir, you nearly killed us out of fright!" Orophin exclaimed, holding his grey elven cloak close to his lithe frame.

Haldir could not help but laugh as he gently tapped his brother on the shoulder.

"Did you not even hear me?" he said. "Why did you seek me out?"

Rumil then spoke up, strapping his quiver to his back, "The Fellowship is close to arriving. You know the Lady. She wants them to come before her unscathed. We ought to go to the Northern Borders by now."

Haldir nodded readily. "Worry not about me. Depart now and I'll follow you. I still have to collect my weapons from my talan."

"All right, brother," Rumil and Orophin answered. They then went off on their way, leaving Haldir by the riverbank.

Now that he was alone again, Haldir reached inside his garments and pulled out a fine chain. At the end of it was the scarlet flower and emerald leaves, his last keepsake to remind him of Arthendion. Upon her and Anar-galad's death, he had steeled his heart and built a wall around himself, which was only demolished by his brothers, whom he loved most next to his Lord and lady.

He then kissed the sparkling blossom for one last time and with one graceful swing of his arm, he threw the necklace into the river Celebrant, where its rushing waters ran over the lost relic and washed it out to the Sea.

In the far banks, Haldir stood still, letting the wind flutter and play with his silken hair. He then said, hoping that she would hear, wherever he may be, "Naneth, I will still treasure your teachings inside my heart. I do not need your necklace to remind me of you."

And as he walked away, Haldir thought he heard Arthendion's melodious voice ring in the forest for one last time, singing

"You will be who you want to be,

You can choose whatever heaven grants.

As long as you can have your chance,

I swear I'd give my life for you.

No one can stop what I must do.

I swear I'd give my life for you."

Watch out for the sequel, 'The Song of the Aiwenor'. Intriguing? Exciting? Well, please lend me all the inspiration, and I will do the rest for you!