A/N: Right… I haven't been writing fanfics for… I dunno, a year? And I can't be bothered finishing my X-men Evo one, cuz it takes too much effort.. (damn, I'm getting lazy…) I feel kinda bad reading the reviews I got from some sweet-mouth reviewers, and I think I'll continue writing when I feel xmen-inspiration revisiting. :P Well, considering that I haven't written for quite a while, plz excuse any bad writing skills, grammar, etc., if my writing does not achieve your standards. Although not my first fanfic, this is my first Naruto fanfic, so if I seem rather stiff at any point, do forgive me.
So maybe this storyline does seem a little weird. But Roald Dahl has always been a favorite of mine, and I had actually been saving this storyline up for Xmen evo (it would be cool to see mice running around with mutant powers.. XD) But Naruto came along and addictions do change… I'm gonna try to get as many of the characters in as I possibly can, so if this chapter seems to have a lack of your favorite Naruto individual, just wait a while and maybe he/she may pop up somewhere along the story.
Disclaimer: Naruto does not belong to me (duh) and neither does 'The Witches' (double duh)
Chapter 1: Something Weird
Naruto could feel his eyes gradually getting heavier and he was starting to lose whatever little focus he had even had. He squinted hard at the blackboard before giving up and knocking out, with his head face-down on his desk. He was dancing around in a sunny and cheerful garden of sweet-smelling roses when a sharp pang at the back of his head snapped him out of his dream and into a series of muffled chokes. He looked up to the front see Iruka glaring at him and the entire class chuckling away. When Iruka resumed the lesson, Naruto turned back to see who had thrown that damn eraser at him, and saw Sasuke rolling his eyes and shaking his head. Naruto glared at him, though he was particularly thankful that it was Sasuke's eraser and not Iruka's hard metal ruler that had hit him.
The class bell rang and the students were getting ready to go when Iruka yelled out, "By the way, class, in order to fortify the camaraderie between the Hidden Leaf and the Hidden Sand and Sound, our school teachers are exchanging with the other villages' Ninja Academy's teachers, so if you see some other people walking around next week instead of us, please don't go hysterical and start throwing daggers at them." The last line was accompanied by a concerned smile toward Naruto, which got the class laughing again while they made their way out the classroom.
---
"Hey, Kakashi-sensei, you know about that teacher-exchange thing?" Naruto stopped practicing with his shuriken and looked at his teacher.
"Yea?" Kakashi responded.
"Is it a must for the exchange to happen? I mean, just cuz we're trying to get on friendly terms with the Sand and Sound doesn't mean it's important for a teacher-exchange, is it?"
"Well, it was agreed between the nations that for an alliance to be established, trust in each other must initially be gained. So what better way than through the education system? That way, we still protect any vulnerability by not letting them into our team trainings or near the Hokage, but through a more counteractive method, which is our ninja academy, where in most villages, the education system is pretty much identical, and where there are many students to offensively retaliate if necessary."
Naruto blinked. "So… it's not a must for the exchange to happen?"
Kakashi rolled his one exposed eye, "No. It is a must, Naruto."
Naruto immediately started sulking.
Kakashi shook his head and… smiled? Naruto couldn't tell. His trainer's face was just too covered up. Naruto had always found Kakashi to be a very mysterious, cool, yet… strange man. He was calm and composed, and almost sleepy-looking for most of the time, with odd habits that were quite unexpected of someone like him. But when he was serious, damn he was scary. Naruto never forgot the battle between Zabuza and Kakashi on Team 7's first mission, and he had been a little amazed and frightened by his trainer. But all the different qualities jumbled up together were what made Naruto think he had the coolest teacher in Konoha, or possibly in all the villages. And that was why he didn't want Kakashi to leave.
"Sensei, can you pleeeeeeaaaase ask the Hokage to stay here in Konoha? Say that it's extremely important that you supervise my training! He can't say no to that, can he?"
"Naruto, this exchange is really important, and I'm sure you can survive the term without your fantastic trainer. Just keep practicing what I've told you to work on and I want you to have mastered it by the time I get back, okay?"
Naruto just sulked more but nodded.
---
Naruto was panting heavily as he ran toward his classroom. He had been moody the entire weekend for having to miss out on an entire term's training, and had to relieve himself of his depression by indulging in ramen. But this temporary depression was also the cause of him getting up late that morning. The more depressed he was, the more sleep he needed. At least that was the excuse he convinced himself of. As he carelessly turned a corner, he bumped into someone else. He looked up to see a man, with dark hair tied back, and most noticeably, six arms. Naruto snapped out from his shock and mumbled his apologies before dashing off toward his classroom. The man was probably one of the new substitutes, for Naruto had never seen him before.
When reached outside his classroom door, he stopped to catch his breath. He slid open the door, and instead of seeing Iruka-sensei with the usual shake of his head, standing there was another freak, for a substitute teacher. Naruto couldn't help but go wide-eyed and let out an "Ack!" It looked like something out from a little boy's nightmares. Looking down at him was a hunched man, with queer, dark-ringed eyes, light blue hair and a thin line of dark blue for a mouth. Naruto swallowed hard and smiled, "Hehez… ah, sorry I'm late." It wasn't exactly a good idea to be late on the first day of school, and the first impression was always the most important. Looks like Naruto screwed it up once again. He was about to dash to his seat when the sub turned around and looked at him again.
Naruto did a double take. It was not normal to look at someone, then turn your back at them and look at them again. No, definitely not normal.
But yes, the teacher was looking at him again. This time Naruto went wide-eyed and nearly fainted. The teacher had someone else on his back, who looked exactly the same as the other one, with shoulder length light blue hair, and the same dark eyes and blue lips. It looked like they were born as twins that just came out wrong, with the brother stuck to the back of the other in an odd way. The man on the back glared at him as Naruto scrambled to his seat. Naruto knew this was not good. The teacher hadn't even scolded him, more even said a word, and Naruto was already shaking inside. Just what kind of freaks did the other villages have? Naruto looked to the front at Sakura, who was quite visibly quivering, and he glanced back at Sasuke, who was merely gazing intently at the teacher.
The purple hair sub turned around to face the black board, causing the other sub to swing and face the students. The entire class could barely suppress their gasp. Kiba's puppy was whining softly in fear. The purple hair sub picked up a piece of chalk and started writing on the board. The loud, intolerable screech of chalk against the rough board echoed throughout the classroom, and the class groaned in deafening agony. The sub dropped the chalk and turned around, allowing the other sub to write on the board, with the same noisy screech. The sub also dropped the chalk and the purple hair teacher suddenly spoke, "You shall address me as Sakon-sensei, and…" he turned sideways, allowing the other sub to say, "I am Ukon-sensei." Sakon turned back to face them. "In this lesson, we'll be going through what we expect of this class and the rest of the school."
'No way' Naruto thought, 'the whole lesson? How much do they expect from us?'
Apparently, the new subs' list of expectation was long enough to take up the entire lesson. It had every 'no' you could think of, from no going to the toilet during class time because it was unnecessary, no talking because it was rude, and no eating because it would be distracting, all the way to no ninja techniques allowed because it was a classroom and not a battlefield, no asking too many questions because it was annoying, and no gawking at crushes because it was stupid - to which almost all the girls in the class sighed sadly and looked at Sasuke.
"What next, no breathing?" Naruto mumbled.
"And no breathing… too much." Sakon added, causing the entire class to gawk, "Because there's not enough air in this infinitesimal room for the entire lot of you unworthy rats."
---
"So we haven't done or said anything yet and they already hate us." Naruto complained. "It's only the first two hours of school and I'm already hating it." Naruto, who was on his way to the cafeteria, saw another teacher walk by - a female, whom he had been told was called Takuya, though she was at least one of the better looking ones of all the subs. There was a stray bit of reddish fringe that hung over the middle of her forehead, which Naruto found extremely irritating. But at least she looked normal. "Hey, I noticed that all the teachers are from the Hidden Sound. Where are the ones from Sand?"
Sakura and Sasuke were walking with him, but it was Sakura that answered, "Kakashi-sensei told me that the exchange was rotated, where the teachers from the Hidden Sound comes to the Hidden Leaf village, the teachers from Leaf go to Sand, and the teachers from Sand go to Sound. The Hidden Mist will be joining in the rotation soon though."
Naruto nodded in comprehension, and not noticing where he was going, crashed straight into a box someone was pushing on a trolley, spilling out its contents.
"Ah! Sorry!!" Naruto apologized in embarrassment, and looked up to the person. It was a gigantic and incredibly fat man, bald with some pink hair at the sides and middle of his head, much like an apache hairstyle. He looked passively down at Naruto, who was starting to feel really small. Naruto bent down and with the help of Sakura and Sasuke, started picking up the objects. He stared at them. They were… mousetraps?
When the trio dumped the last of the mousetraps into the box which was stacked atop many other piles, the sub started off without a word.
"Err, hey!" Naruto called out.
The sub turned back so that his head was sideways.
"Sir, ah, sensei, may I ask what all the mousetraps are for?"
The sub's expression didn't change, but he replied, "I heard there's gonna be a mice-infestation coming to Konoha, and I wanted to be prepared." And he was off.
Sakura was white-faced, "M-mice?" she stammered.
Naruto was scratching his head, before exclaiming aloud, "Ah, why are all the subs so damn weird? In fact, this whole thing is weird." And he kept on walking.
Sasuke, who was staring after the fat teacher who had just turned around a corner, felt that Naruto may have just hit the spot right there.
Something weird was definitely going on.
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A/N: Is anyone too OOC? I'm trying to maintain as much as Sasuke's cold and quiet self as possible without it seeming like he's not even there. :S And I think Kakashi had talked too much at one point… BAH!! Keeping in character is so hard…
The Sound teachers in the fic are actually from the Sound Five, Orochimaru's gatekeepers. I watch the anime and so I'm only updated that way. So I have no idea just how exactly the Sound Five look like and I'm clueless of their individual characteristics. (Thank God for the internet)
I'm going to be the dignified person I am and NOT push you for reviews. I'm too cool to request any.
{Falls on knees and wails} Oh, PLEASE!! Review, I beg of you!! Tell me what you think!! Your valuable opinion is crucial!!
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