There is a joke for Protector of the Small, if you plan on reading that book, don't.
Ok I made a reference to Robin Hood, the cartoon version, Where Prince Jon is a lion thing, And Robin is a fox, so think of that movie.
Oh and thank you for reading Quest for butter first.
Jon is in his night gown (Ya men wore those back then, trust me, I know) sitting Indian style on his big big big big big big big big big big big big bed. (Which is not used for massive group orgies.) He has a writing table on his lap, with a long piece of parchment and an ink bottle on top.
Jon: (looks up at a random servant who is taking out the now cold water out of his tub.) I thought I had a lot of friends, why can I only think four people? ( looks down at the names he had written: Alanna, Raoul, George, Gary.)
Random Servant who takes cold water out of tub: I know not, yer Majesty, I know not'in ov yer life. I know not that ye had a affair with Sire Alanna. I know not that ye asked her t' marry you, and she said no. I know not that ye have'int shared the Queens bed in some time. I know nothing of yer life, Majesty.
Jon: (the stupid walrus head that he is) Of course not dear, I was but thinking to my self.
Random Servant who takes cold water out of tub: (briskly walks out of room)
Jon: (goes back to thinking of more people to invite.)
Half an hour later
Jon: (still thinking of some one else to invite.) I got it! (He said as he stood up. He looked down to see ink all over his recently pressed night gown) NOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!! My mommy got this for me!!!!!!!!!
Palace Healer Guy who's name I can't remember: (runs in to see what was going on.) What is wrong your Majesty?
Jon: (still crying like a baby) I got ink all over my nighty!!!!!! (sticks thumb into mouth and sucks on it.)
Five minute after
Jon: (takes thumb out of his mouth) I have a dirty thumb. (looks up at healer guy) Where did you come from?
Palace Healer Guy who's name I can't remember: I was going to Neals rooms, ...not that I was going to have sex with him, but....I ....wanted to show him some new healing techniques! And I heard you, your Majesty.
Jon: (getting a tiny winy bit suspicious.....but then forgot why) I don't care what you were doing, what are you going to do about this ink stain?.......It was the last thing that mommy gave me before....before....she..... she.............died!!!! WAAAAAAAAAAA AAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! MOMMY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (goes back to sucking dirty thumb.
Palace Healer Guy who's name I can't remember: I could take it to the washers, sir. I'm sure they could clean it.
Jon: (falls on to really big big big big big bed that is not used for group orgies, and sucks thumb)
Palace Healer Guy who's name I can't remember: Majesty? Sire? I'm sure that they can clean it sire.
Jon: That's not why I'm crying. I don't care about a stupid nighty, I have enough money to buy a new one! I'm crying because I have no friends! (goes back to crying)
Palace Healer Guy who's name I can't remember: That's not true sire! Well you got Alanna,......Gary,......Raoul,.......Ale- well not Alex,......Myles,.....um well I guess George counts too. And,......um,.......And.....
Jon: who else?
Healer Guy who's nickname I don't want to write down any more so is now Healer Guy: well Sire I'm sure you plenty more friends out in the desert.
Jon: No. They just do what I tell them, because I am The Voice. They all hate me, cause I never go out there like I should, but really don't want to do cause I'm a lazy ass.
Healer Guy: Oh well um, I have to go. I'll have some one come for the night gown. Good night your Majesty. (leaves)
Jon: (stops crying now that there is no one to fuss over him, picks up the parchment and goes back to invitations.) Back to my wonderful idea. Looks up at the camera, if you don't remember before I got ink all over me, I had an idea. (gets up to find new night gown) I know exactly what to do.
Randomly evil laugh: (comes out of Jon's mouth) (Then just to piss him off, says "I have butter!!!!!!!!!!!")
Cast from Quest for Butter: (comes out of the closet) Did you say butter?!
Jon: (to himself) Damn it! (to them) No I only have the real kind
Cast from Quest from butter: Damn! And we in the middle of seeing if Butter Fingers had any. (Runs back into closet)
Jon: now, I believe I was in the middle of an evil laugh.
Randomly evil laugh: oh ya, sorry. (clears throat, if... a evil laugh ...has.... a throat, then comes out of Jon's mouth again,.... but not his throat)
Later that night
Jon: (who is now sleep deprived) I finally have done it! I have finished my invitations! I have lots people to come to my pool party now! Yae!! (skips around room) Now I must send theses out to my friends!
Randomly evil laugh: am I needed now sire?
Jon: no, you may go to sleep. I won't need you till tomorrow at least.
Randomly evil laugh: Sire I don't sleep, I just kind of,....sit there till I am needed.
Jon: well, alright. Then just go bother the pages or something. They could use a little provoking.
Randomly evil laugh: yes tour Majesty. (leaves,....somehow)
Maid servant: (walks in) Yer Majesty, (bows, really exposes her huge boobs) I was told that ye needed someth'in washed?
Jon: Yes, (picks up night gown) I got ink all over this.
Maid servant: (takes garment) I do believe it can be cleaned, your majesty.
Jon: Good. (turns away from her, but then looks back.) You have big boobies. (Not having to be nice because he was the King)
Maid servant: why,..um...thank ye, yer Majesty.
Jon: (his eyes never move from her boobies) Would you like to stay for a while?
Maid servant: Yer Majesty, I don't think that'd be a very good idea. Think ov the Queen. (She was backing away as she talked.
Jon: (walking toward her) She won't find out, her room is in another corridor.
Maid servant: Majesty, I should go.
Jon: (not paining any attention to her mouth raised his hands in front of him like Frankenstein) abuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhhhhh (it came out of his mouth as he reached for the maid servant's boobies)
Maid servant: (runs out of room before Jon can grab her boobies)
Jon: (puts his hands down) Where did she go?
Sorry it took awhile, I wanted to work on my other stories first, from now on I'm going to write a chapter, then move on to the next story. So it might be a week in between chapies.
Oh, and the whole abuh thing, inside joke, so review and tell me if you found it funny. Or I will set Jon after you!
Jon: (walks toward your computer) abuuuuuuuuuuuuhhhhhhh
