Disclaimer: I am a lonely little writer who owns nothing.
Author's Notes: the response to this was, at the least, overwhelming. It wasn't that there were so many reviews; it was that the ones I got were so sweet and truly made my day. I pray you all forgive me for the late update and review this and tell me what you think of it.
What am I doing? No one really reads these anyway. ü Please, do enjoy.
Oh and Alikona? She wasn't playing bass when she was doing the solo. Let's pretend Zack did. Just clarifying.
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Chapter 2- The Reason
I'm not a perfect person
There's many things I wish I didn't do
But I continue learning
I never meant to do those things to you
And so I have to say before I go
That I just want you to know
-Hoobastank
Lights momentarily lit up the small room through the cracks in the blinds, making Zachary Mooneyham's eyesight blur for a moment. His dark brown eyes narrowed at the small window, damning the driver who hadn't been aware that his car possessed a dimmer switch for his headlights. He was probably some college yuppie who just got a brand spankin' new convertible because his boat sank or something, Zack concluded, thoroughly disgusted.
He turned his head back to Katie's sleeping form, wrapped in his arms, and Zack sincerely wanted to keep it that way. He had always known that they belonged together, no matter how cheesy it sounded or clichéd a couple they were. It was like God (and his vision of God was a bit skewed, being that he believed God to take the form of Alanis Morisette, thanks to the great piece of art that was Dogma) had made them at the same time and one would never be able to function properly without the other. Katie was the one thing he kept living for, and he liked to live in his delusions that she felt the same way. It had always escaped him why she had stayed with him all these years. She deserved so much better than him.
He laced his henna-ink stained fingers with her long, creamy-white ones and took a deep breath, savoring the smell of her. Her hair always smelled like citrus and lilacs and her skin a mix of wood and metal, owing to the fact that she was always with her guitar and bass. Even if he tried, he would never find anyone else like her. He didn't want to. She was all he would ever need.
If only he could tell her that.
Zack pulled Katie's sleeping form closer so that her head was resting on his shoulder and his lips brushed against her ear.
"Are you awake, Posh?" he whispered softly.
Katie didn't stir and continued to breathe evenly.
Zack took a deep breath. "Remember the first time we had a concert? You were so nervous and pale you looked like you were about to spontaneously combust." He laughed slowly. "Right then I knew that I'd fallen in love with you and there was no going back. I know that maybe I don't say it as often as I should but I do, Posh. I love you more than a human being could possibly love another. I swear that I'll always be there for you, whether you need me or not. You mean more to me than air or sky or ground. I'd even give up music for you, without a second thought. You're the Goddess and I'm your faithful worshipper. Maybe I should start a new religion... Katie-ism? What do you think?"
He thought he saw her smile at that.
"I love it when you smile, and the way your lip quivers when you're about to cry or you don't get something you want. I love the way you blink when Summer says something you don't understand, I love the way your forehead crinkles up during math and chemistry, and the way your nostrils flare when Freddy teases you. I love it when you laugh at my corny jokes but I hate it when you cry. Whenever you do I want to change the world so that it'll stop hurting you.
"I want us to stay like this forever, Kaye. Would you? Would you stay forever with me?"
Zack let out a long sigh. "I'm not acting like myself, am I, Posh?" he asked her ear.
Katie shifted slightly so that her cheek was pressed against his lips. "I love you, Zack," she said sleepily, her brown eyes opening slightly. Her pale-rose lips pulled upward into a smile. "You don't have to say it for me to know,"
He smiled as well and pressed his lips lightly against hers, his long-ish black hair falling around both their faces. He pulled away, his hand resting under her shirt on her bare stomach, his eyes asking permission.
Katie propped herself up on her elbows and met his lips again, this time allowing him entry.
Mid-September rain fell softly outside Zack's window.
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"Kaye?" Therese Brown knocked softly on her daughter's door, asking permission to enter. She was all right as a mother, being that she was still young but she never knew how to talk to Katie about things. She always felt like she was smothering her daughter, like she was about to do now.
Katie covered the mouthpiece of her telephone with her hand and blinked up at her mum. They normally didn't converse with each other unless it was something serious, and the serious expression on her mother's face told her that it was. "Hold on," she told her mum, and turned away so that she couldn't see what she was saying.
"Zack?"
She saw Therese flinch slightly at this.
"I gotta go. I'll see you tomorrow at Sandra's, ok?"
Zack gave out a grunt, which meant yes. "Night, Posh. Sleep tight. Sweet dreams. I love you."
She smiled slightly. "You're such a corndog, Zack. I love you too. Night." She placed the receiver back on the cradle and pulled her legs up to her chin, looking up at her mum questioningly.
Therese was now walking around her room, looking at the photos, a majority of them being of her and Zack. Katie mentally berated herself. Her parent's were all right with her dating, but they knew how long Zack and Katie had been going steady. And knowing them, they would be concerned about it.
"So, talking to Zack?"
Katie sighed; she knew this was going. "Yes, mum. Why? Anything wrong?" She couldn't get the defensive tone out of her voice. Dammit!
"Katie, how old are you?" Therese asked, picking up the pair of jeans Katie had been wearing that day at school and folding them carefully before setting them onto the rest of Katie's dirty laundry.
"Sixteen mum. I'm turning seventeen in December."
"How many people have you dated?"
"One, mum. You know that. Zack." She replied, her eyes narrowing dubiously. What was her mum getting at?
"Honey, I think you should see other people. All you know is Zack and you're too young to have yourself tied down by one person."
Katie's arms fell down onto her pillows in shock. Where was this coming from? Was she serious? She couldn't be, could she? Her parents would never, never make her do anything as foul... as evil... as appalling as make her stop dating Zack, right?
Therese sat down at the foot of Katie's bed and stroked her daughter's knee. "Katie, there's a whole world of everything out there. It would be sad if you missed all that because you were afraid to go out of your comfort zone, don't you think?"
"So you're saying Zack is holding me back or something!?" Katie almost screamed, offended, hurt, defensive and downright pissed at the idea her mother was proposing.
Therese shook her head, sighing inwardly. She knew Katie would react like this. After all, she would have too if her parents had told her to stop dating the one man she loved. But she had to do this. It was for Katie's own good to try new things. "Honey, you know I love Zack like a son. He's the ideal son-in-law, and I'm not saying you should stop loving him. Just cool off for a bit between the both of you and try to date other people. You're getting too dependent on one another and that's just not healthy in a relationship."
Katie shook her head, unable to keep her eyes from tearing. "No. NO! you can't make me do this and I wont do it."
"Honey, you father and I have decided. It's either you date new people or we send you to your aunt in New York and study there."
Katie's brown eyes went wide at this. Her mouth fell open to retort but she couldn't form any words. All she could do was sit there, looking like a fish out of water, trying to comprehend what her parents were making her do. All too suddenly her eyes started stinging, like when an eyelash was stuck and she couldn't get it out. The room went blurry.
"Oh, Katie, honey," Therese pleaded, feeling like a major heel.
"Please, mum, just get out." Katie managed to choke out, grabbing the nearest pillow and burying her face in it.
Her mum stood up and moved towards the door. "If you're sneaking out to Raine's don't forget your jacket." she said as she closed to door behind her.
Katie held in a scream and threw the pillow at the door after her. How could she still be so cool and calm after ripping her daughter's life apart!? Thoroughly pissed she did the only thing she could think of: call Raine to see if she was at home.
"You've reached the Vasquez residence. Press 1 to leave a message for Nicodemus Vasquez. Press 2 for Nicolette Vasquez. Press 3 for Mitchell Vasquez. Press 4 for Katarina-"
The recording was barely finished before Katie punched in 4. Raine finally picked up just when Katie thought she'd go insane from the constant ringing.
"This better be important," Raine sputtered into the receiver. Katie could just imagine her leaning across the bed, still in her clothes from school, looking cross that someone had woken her up. She didn't blame her- it was well past 11.
"Raine," Katie managed to say, new tears forming around her dark brown eyes.
"Kaye?" her best friend sounded more awake now. "What happened? Are you all right? Is everything OK? Chill! What happened? Is it Zack? Oh my gosh, I totally saw this coming. Don't worry about it and just, just breathe for a second, all right?"
Katie almost laughed at Raine's banter. "You chill, Raine. My mum just walked in and said that I'm not allowed to be Zack's girlfriend anymore because I should try new things. What the hell are they on? So now I need someone else's permission to be with him? Ugh! They're just so full of bull I wanna SCREAAAAAAAAMMMMMMMM!!!"
There was a pause on the other line. "Uh-huh. You go do that, Kaye. But I totally agree. It's a total perversion of their guardianship rights. They can't tell you who to date!"
"I know and it's just so frustrating because I know she's serious!"
Another pause, as if Raine were carefully choosing her words. "So are you? Gonna be a total slut and date other guys or at least tell Zack?"
Katie thought about it for a second. "I don't know!" she half-screamed into the mouthpiece. "AAAUUURRRGGHH!! Raine, I really really need help. I don't know what to do. I can't lie to my parents or follow what they're telling me to do and I as sure as hell can't tell Zack."
"Look at it this way, how would Zack react if he found out you went on a date with some guy your 'rents made you go with?"
"He'd go ballistic and not even try to hear an explanation." Katie answered automatically.
"Exactly, so it's better that you tell him about it and let him help you figure something out, don't you think? Stop being pessimistic about it and think of it as a weird crazy cool adventure in your relationship."
A pause. "Raine, did you just say 'weird crazy cool'?"
"I'm deprived of sleep, Kaye. Cut me some slack." Her best friend laughed.
"Oh, Raine? What did you mean when you said you were expecting this from Zack?"
After a few more seconds the reply finally came. "Nothing, I was just on the defensive if he'd hurt you or something equally impossible, right?" Raine laughed feebly.
Too distraught, Katie decided to buy it. "Oh. Well, I'll see you tomorrow. I have to stay awake the rest of the night trying to think of the perfect way to tell Zack."
"There is no perfect way. And if you decide to wimp out, I can always be your back up and tell him, OK? So don't lose too much sleep over it. Night, Kaye. And please try to smile once in a while."
Katie laughed as her best friend quoted "Lullaby". "Fine. Night, Raine. Thanks."
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"This stuff's good, you sure you don't want any?" Raine asked, her voice slightly muffled by the finger coated with maple syrup in her mouth.
Zack looked up at his best friend, next to Freddy Jones of course, looking tired but happy. They were at Sandra's Diner, having breakfast like they did every weekday morning. It was Friday, the last day of the week, and they were waiting for Freddy and Katie to show up.
Raine Vasquez was a year below their batch; a sophomore. She and Katie had practically identical hair, long and black with red highlights, except Raine's skin was paler and her eyes were a violent bluish purple. The two of them went shopping at vintage stores all the time and made their own clothes.
Zack mused at the irony of how even if Raine was the youngest she was the one who acted like their mother- fiercely protective but infinitely loving at the same time. He looked down at the plate of blueberry pancakes and frowned. "And you complain that you're fat," he said, wrinkling his nose at her.
Raine threw a napkin at his face. "I am fat; you call me a pig at least twice a day. But at least I'm not some malnourished wanker with too-long hair and a ratty face and scrawny bird-bones." she scoffed. They both knew it wasn't true.
Zack had grown up to fulfill every one of Dewey Finn's expectations and live out his "rock god" ideals. He hardly ever cut his hair (Raine cut it for him when they had the time), making his straight jet-black bangs fall into his puppy dog gray eyes that always betrayed a secret. He was a normal tan color, not too pale and not too dark, and he had a slight slouch from playing hours on end with his heavy cherry red Gibson flying V. He always had a confused, far away stare, as if in the back of his mind he was making up lyrics and his fingers searching for the right chords. He dressed in faded band t-shirts, too-loose jeans and worn-out black Chucks. In other words... he was rock god personified.
Zack smiled at the familiar insult-exchange, suddenly feeling up to the challenge. It had been too long since they'd sniped at each other. "Well, I'm not the fat, short and ugly severely untalented chick with ugly red hair, an annoying British accent and a pudgy face," he dead-panned, his voice not rising one bit.
They'd been doing this to each other since they were in grade school. In fact, it was the reason they had become so close in the first place. Raine had just transferred to Horace Green from a dance academy in London, and on her first day of 5th grade and she had accidentally crashed into Zack in the hallway, sending his guitar flying and crashing into a wall. The insults began to fly and they both got detention, where she'd apologized and they had become close friends. She had replaced the ruined guitar and now it was one of Zack's most prized possessions.
Raine grinned at Zack. "I'm glad to see you're back to your old self, Jimi." She'd been calling him "Jimi" since the first time she heard us, School of Rock, play, and he called her "Steffi" because her favorite singer at the time had been Gwen Steffani.
Around them Yellowcard's "Way Away" started playing from the boom box as Raine ducked down, rummaging around her army messenger bag.
Zack tucked into his bacon and eggs just as Freddy walked in, looking half-asleep. His hair was sticking up at the back and his black TRIBAL shirt was rumpled, as were his jeans. His normally bright blue eyes were bleary and the indent of his sheets were still on his face. Everyone had noticed that he had toned down over the years and was content to be in the background, but he hardly ever was because every girl wanted him, and every guy wanted to be like him for it. Tomika told them once that she'd heard that there was a Freddy Jones Fan Club. Zack hadn't been able to sleep well that night.
Freddy slid into the booth beside Raine and took a gulp of her orange juice. "'Sup?"
Raine finally sat back upright, a bottle of henna-ink in her fishnet-gloved hand. "Did you even remember to brush your teeth this morning, Fred?"
A pause.
"Yes,"
She rolled her naturally purple eyes and tossed him her bottle of Tic-Tacs. Freddy put them down beside the glass of juice so he wouldn't forget before gobbling down the rest of the pancakes. Raine was now drawing patterns on her wrist with the henna-ink. Her fingers were practically as stained as Zack's because they did hennas for extra pocket money, but it wasn't as obvious on her because her fingernails were always painted black. She and Katie used to graffiti-paint each other's nails, but what with both their extra-curriculars and love lives and respective bands, neither had found enough time.
Freddy let out a loud belch just as another song began. It was "Clumsy" by Our Lady Peace.
Raine stopped and waved her hand in front of her face, frowning. "That was nasty, Fred. I'm sure Marta would loathe to see you right now," she informed him.
Freddy shrugged. "Doesn't matter. We broke up,"
Zack raised an eyebrow at this startling piece of information. Their relationship had been Freddy's longest ever, basically because of the fact that Marta had been used to him and his slob-ish, slightly dense cluelessness. They had been going out for a whole year and now he was stating it as if it were the most natural thing in the world. Zack wondered dubiously if Freddy took anything seriously at all. Raine was trying to look indifferent about it in her corner of the booth, but she wanted to smile.
"Why? When? How? Why didn't you tell me?"
Freddy sighed; classic Zack interrogation. He would have preferred just talking to Katie or Raine about it, because they wouldn't say anything, try to make him feel better by telling him what a fantastic catch he was (he grinned inwardly at this thought), and he could let out how crappy he was feeling, but now Zack knew and he deserved to know the whole story. After all, they had been friends for 7 years. In 6th grade Freddy said that Zack was a Martian, and Zack had countered that Freddy was his Martian mother.
Freddy tried valiantly not to smile at the random memory.
"We talked about it last month because she said it wasn't working out for her, that I wasn't paying enough attention. I asked if we could give it a chance and, well, you can see that didn't work." Freddy said slowly, his hands tapping the side of the booth table with every syllable.
Freddy berated himself mentally. Why couldn't he tell them the whole story? He let out a sigh. It was as much as he could allow himself to say at the moment. Wounds were still raw.
Raine spoke before Zack could. "Is that why you're such a mess today?" she asked as-a-matter-of-factly.
Freddy paused then shrugged. "Maybe. I'm not really sure."
Zack, who had been sitting on the edge of his seat while Freddy had been speaking, leaned back onto the fire hydrant red vinyl seat, running a hand through his messy black hair. A habit of his when he was preparing to say something heavy.
He was fighting an incredible mental battle within him. Even if the blond punk drummer was smiling on the outside, his friends knew him well enough to know that he was really in pain over breaking up with Marta. Zack wanted to be there for him, but he was never really one for many words.
"That's not the whole story, is it?" Zack prompted, raising his eyebrows at his best friend.
"You don't want to know, Zack. Really, you don't." Freddy said, matching Zack's gaze evenly.
Raine could practically see the war going between them. A war of will and stubbornness. After a few tense moments she turned back to her henna ink, and Freddy looked away; he'd given in to Zack. "Fine," he hissed.
"Sore loser," Raine taunted, punching his arm lightly. Zack almost always won.
Freddy sighed and rested his elbows on the table. Raine was struggling not to say anything about manners for the sake of knowing about what had happened. "You know Nicolas Robin right? Well, he asked Marta out and apparently she's had 'this really really super huge crush on him since, like, forever'-"he said, mocking Marta's high, ditzy voice. The voice that had annoyed the hell out of Zack when she had been his lab partner in biology last year. "So she asked me if an open relationship was all right, and for the hell of it I said we could try it out. It didn't, as you all can obviously see."
"Nobody ever gets the best of both worlds," Zack ventured.
"I guess Marta thought that the grass was greener on the other side even if it isn't." Raine added, hoping it would make him feel better.
Freddy laughed. "You two are hopelessly clichéd romantics who have no concept of reality, aren't you?"
Raine pouted. "Oh bugger off. At least we're not trying to take the mickey out of you or anything horrid like that,"
Zack and Freddy blinked at her. "In normal English please?" they prompted in unison.
"It means that at least she isn't making fun of you or anything equally mean." Katie explained, finally arriving.
Unnerving. She was later than Freddy. Katie slipped into the booth beside Zack and he kissed her lightly on the lips in greeting. She subconsciously stiffened at this. Raine noticed and glared at her.
"Yeah, well you'd know, Posh. You're her best friend." Freddy said defensively.
Raine kicked him with the toe of her combat boots, now annoyed at how cold Katie was acting towards her boyfriend. "So are you and Zack, you bloody wanker. Crickey, you'd think you both'd be used to me by now."
"And you'd think you'd learn how to speak normal English by now, wouldn't you?" Freddy shot back, pinching her leg.
Raine let out slight scream and kicked him hard, which only resulted in Freddy knocking over the glass of orange juice.
The four of them stared at the mess for a moment then burst out laughing.
"You're such a klutz, Frederick Martin Jones!" Maria, the waitress, exclaimed, now in front of their table, looking amused. She took out the notebook and pen from her apron. "This is going on your tab, kids."
Freddy turned to face her, instantly putting on his trademark puppy dog look. "Aww, c'mon Maria. You saw it was an accident."
The woman simply smiled. "You always get the best of me, Frederick, but this better not happen again,"
Freddy grinned and saluted her. "Yes Ma'am! You have my solemn oath, Ma'am!"
Once Maria was out of earshot Raine kicked him again. "You're suck a suck-up, you whore!" she grinned.
Zack caught Katie's eye and smiled. Raine and Freddy always carried on with their own conversations towards the end of breakfast, leaving Katie and Zack their own little world. It was just how things were. Zack and Katie were cool- air and water, while Raine and Freddy smoldered like earth and fire.
"Have you eaten?" Zack asked quietly, his dark eyes gently probing hers.
Katie shook her head, poking her fingers through the stray threads on the bottom of her worn denim skirt. On Fridays all students were allowed to wear casual clothes and today she'd pulled on her older sister's old denim skirt and an ocean blue top that she and Karyl (her sister) had dyed together, pairing it with blue inch high lace-ups. The only rocker-Goth twist to it was the strip of denim cloth Katie had ripped off the bottom of the skirt and tied around her head like a ribbon.
Zack laced his fingers with hers. "You should eat then. Class starts in," he checked the wall clock behind the diner's counter. "15 minutes. I don't want you starving all the way 'til break time."
Katie felt like crying at his genuine concern for her. She nodded mutely and pulled her hand gently out of his to try to choke down some un-orange-juice-soaked pancakes, party out of the need to pacify Zack and partly to assure herself that it would make him happy. She couldn't bring herself to even imagine the conversation that they'd have later that day.
Raine's mascara-ed eyes narrowed slightly, noting how Freddy's attention had wavered and was now directed towards Katie. Not to her immediate surprise, her best friend now looked like she was ready to cry. Zack was looking painfully at her, trying to coax her into telling him what was wrong.
Raine felt a sharp, hallowing pain in her chest. She'd give anything to have someone that held that much concern for her, and there Katie was, oblivious to the fact that not only was Zachary Taylor Mooneyham madly, insanely, head over heels in love with her, but so was his best friend, Frederick Jones.
It didn't exactly take a neurosurgeon to see, and Raine wasn't the dullest tool in the shed. It annoyed her to see how Freddy kept lusting after something he so clearly couldn't have.
Pushing the feelings aside, she grabbed her bag and threw a $10 bill onto the table. "Shove over, Freddy."
The blonde got out of the booth to let her out and she grabbed Katie's bag as well as the other girl's wrist.
"Zack, I'll talk to you later during lunch, all right?"
Zack nodded at her, seeming to retreat back into his frame as he pulled his gaze away from his girlfriend towards the window that overlooked the sidewalk. Freddy's hand was now clenched under the table, pissed at how much more priority Zack had to know what was going on with Katie. The plate of bacon and eggs seemed to sizzle under his glare all over again.
Raine pulled Katie out into the bright sunlight, joining the throng of other students marching over to Jameson High School.
"I'm so sorry, Raine," Katie sniffed, pulling a kerchief from her skirt pocket. "I can't do it. I can't tell him," She took her bag from Raine's other hand and slipped it around her lithe form.
The shorter girl took a deep breath, trying to draw enough patience. She definitely would never become a shrink or a counselor- the job was too emotionally draining. "I understand and it's OK. But it's not like you two are going to break up. You and Zack always find a way. Like remember when you joined our Coven and your parents almost turned you into a hermit? Zack visited you at home everyday, woke you up in the middle of the night by creeping to your window just to give you flowers and tell you how much he loved you. That will never end, Kaye. Zack's always gonna love you and you'll always have your friends."
Katie managed a watery smile. Raine had a point even though Katie was sure she had no idea what she was going through. But still, she couldn't bear to tell Zack.
"Don't worry. I'll tell him if you want me to," Raine promised, smiling and looping her arm through Katie's.
"Raine, you're the best friend anyone could possibly have," Katie beamed.
"I'm not so sure about that," the sophomore whispered quietly to herself.
A/N: did you like? Please, read and review! It's all greatly appreciated! It's a bit poor without much character development though, but I promise to fix that in the coming chapters! Ü R & R!