Because you had to wait so long i'll give ya two. Apologies!! blushes

Chapter 10

The doctors let him out. Finally, he was at home. Finally, his colleagues and their siblings had left him alone. But then again...did he really want to be alone?
When they were here he could take his mind off it, just a little bit. He was going to see a counsellor on Monday; he didn't really have much choice. The pain inside wouldn't go away, it was driving him insane, why wouldn't it go, just for a little while??

He tried everything to take his mind off it, but nothing worked. TV was useless, sleep was impossible, puzzles didn't help- nothing helped. He set himself to start making dinner. All he could hear were their screams. When he closed his eyes, all he saw were their faces, the memories overwhelmed him. Would he ever get away from it?

Right now it didn't seem possible to escape the nightmare. He chopped up the carrots angrily, tears falling unrestrained. He couldn't take this anymore, suddenly he felt his age- he was too young to go through this, how could he live like this? He didn't want to die, he just wanted the pain to go away. He took the knife away from the vegetables, and instead forcefully cut a diagonal line across the back of his arm. Finally the pain inside him stopped, overwhelmed by the physical pain. It hurt, but at the same time it was a relief and he embraced it. The blood dripped onto the clean table and rolled off the edge onto the floor. The blood refused to slow down, and he realised he'd hit something major, as he felt himself going into shock. He didn't want this, if he had to go to hospital the others were bound to find out...then he would be in trouble, they would pity him, he'd be one of those self-harmer types, no-one would ever see him the same again. He grabbed his hand and held it closely, the world was spinning. He fell onto the floor knocking a chair down as he went, he felt weak and scared. The blood dripped through his fingers unrelentingly and he felt sick. This was it. He was going to die. As the revelation struck him, he wasn't afraid anymore. It was all ok.

Jon Sanders knocked on his son's door. No response. He didn't blame his son for being angry at him, but he really needed to talk to him, apologise. He knocked again. Maybe he was out. Or maybe he was having a hallucination, or had fallen unconscious, or...he looked through the keyhole. Jon Sanders had no siblings, and his parents had both passed away. His sole remaining family member was lying in a pool of blood, rapidly losing consciousness. He knocked the door down in panic. Spotting the knife he kicked it out of the way and knelt in the blood next to Greg.

"Greg?! Greg? Stay awake!"

Jon reached for the phone in his pocket and dialled.

"Ambulance! My son, he's losing too much blood please....21 Apartment C, Clayford road...yes...ok..."

Following instructions, he compressed the blood flow and held it up, with his other hand trying to shake Greg's shoulders and wake him up.

The lady on the other end kept on talking and Jon grew impatient. He knew it was rude, but finally he couldn't help it and ended the call whilst she was talking. He suspected she was tying to calm him down so he wouldn't go into shock, but he needed to be with his son. But now he wasn't sure what to do. Silently praying for an ambulance to arrive soon, he pressed slightly harder as the blood seeped through his fingers. In desperate worry Jon begged the unconscious form beside him continuously.

"Greg- please stay with me stay with me please, don't die, you can't die, please, you gotta stay with me, you're all I got left, I'm so sorry I said those things, please..."

When the ambulance arrived, it was all a blur to Greg's father, in shock partly due to the blood he was now covered in, but mainly due to a fear that he would never see his son again, doubled by the harshness of his last words to him.

TBC