Yay! I've finally found the time to update- go me! Lol! But seriously sorry for keeping you guys waiting and I apologise in advance if this isn't up to scratch, I've been having a motivation issue lately, what with xmas and all…so…yeh, Sorry!
Cris-X- Your reviews have inspired a moment or two in this chapter, keep your eyes peeled for em (not that you could really miss it its HUUUGGGEE!) Anyway much thanks for these reviews which took me over the 70 mark!! GO YOU!! *Gets all excited* This has got the most reviews for any of my fics (tho technically 'No Added Sugar' got the most per chapter but its only a one shot!) Anyway it was great to here your views, but sorry neither Angel or Psylocke are gonna make an appearance, though after this series I'm thinking of doing another one whether 'Evolution style' or the same as this but different mutants is yet to be decided!
Ncsgirl~ You're back!! Bout time you updated your Xmen fics though don't ya think? Wheres the Xmas special ya promised? Hope to see you about soon! Your presence has been duly noticed and greatly missed *pulls sad face*. Hope ya had a nice Xmas, and I promise to email you soon, maybe even tonight!!
Trunksblue~ Yeh the 'man flesh' was the really obvious connotation of it meaning literally Eric's flesh, sorry it wasn't very sophisticated! Lol. My gags are too simple, I really need to bring this up to my Retribution X standard, I think they are a lot more fun! (Well to write anyway!)
Pyromaniac666~ Hey what made you change your name? Sorry I didn't update in 3 days *guilty face* I'll be honest and admit I am just plain lazy! Does that mean that Eric Kat and Scott are gonna pay me a visit? Better late then never write? *Gulps*
And last but not least….
xXRogue-DemonXx~ Yep I used the bonfire! I'm so glad you suggested it, ya know the ol' muses ain't been working to full capacity on this fic's out put so I rely heavily on you guys suggestions…and when they are as good as they have been I get inspired to actually write, especially as the next Retribution X fic is causing me major headaches. I do have another one shot coming out soon though! It's my first attempt to be serious outside of *those* R X stories so I'm really not sure how it will work out. I hope it don't burn no ones eyes out!! Lol!
Day 16 in the X Big Brotherhood mansion~ Nomination day
8:30AM
"Hank wake up" Bobby shakes Hanks shoulder in a bid to wake the big guy up "Come on you big lummox I've got a surprise for you"
"Robert, I feel I should remind you that I am not communicating with you after the events that took place yesterday" Hank growls sniffily before maturely poking his tongue out and turning his back to Bobby
"Awww come on Hank just come and see it then you can ignore me" Bobby pokes a big furry shoulder
Silence fills the room for a minute or two.
"GET YOUR FURRY BLUE BEHIND UP!" Bobby says clambering on to the bits of mattress not occupied by Dr McCoy's large limbs before bouncing up and down while singing 'I know a song that will get on your nerves'.
This carries on for a few minutes before a huge boot attacks Hanks head as if from nowhere.
Hank sits upright and rubs the spot where his head made contact with the projectile
"I fear that you aim needs to be improved Logan" Hank says soberly
"Nah it don't, it hit you didn't it…now do what the brat says and save yourself a world o' hurt" With that Logan turns over and instantly begins snoring
Bobby looks at Logan for a minute "Geez and to think he said I'm noisy, it sounds like hurricane Susan's in here."
Hank gets up and stretches
Suddenly Logan snores particularly loudly
"Oh my God he's trying to suck us in!" Bobby exclaims before acting like he's being sucked in by another of Logan's tremendous snores, Hank tries to smother the grin that threatens to crack his face by pulling a loose sweater over his head.
When Hank is fully dressed Bobby tugs on his large hand and directs him to the garden where, next to the world renowned Marshmallow tree, is a huge Twinkie tree.
"Bobby is that…?"
"Yes Hank it's a Twinkie tree, I grew it especially for you" Bobby looks proudly at his creation.
Hanks eyes mist over as he grabs Bobby and gives him a huge bear huge before ruffling his hair
"It's the best present I have ever had"
"That's ok Hankster; I wanted to say sorry but without actually saying the words" There is silence between the two of them before Bobby moves swiftly "WEDGIE"
Hank jumps startled "Oh my stars and Garters"
He begins chasing after Bobby, earlier feelings of upset between the two forgotten.
9:01AM
Big Brother has made the announcement that there will be no replacements for Eric and that nomination will go ahead as normal. He also announced that there is a stash of toothpicks and cocktail umbrella's under the sink in the case of an emergency or attack (both Kat related).
9:10AM
Bobby has decided to 'cook' breakfast as a surprise for the other housemates.
"What ya rustled up for us this mornin' shrimp?" Rogue asks ruffling Bobby's hair as he stops what he is doing to glower at her for a moment
"It's a surprise!"
Hank doesn't look bothered by the fact that Bobby is cooking his breakfast, Remy on the other hand is twitching like a flea at the prospect.
"Here we go…" Bobby walks over to the table carrying two breakfast bowls full of…ice cream "This is one of my favourites, it has chocolate chips and just a hint of mint….I thought it might help with your mouth odour Logan"
Logan snarls in Bobby's direction sending him scuttling back to the counter, before returning with two more bowls one for Victor and one for Hank.
Hank looks into his bowl before clapping his hands and squealing like an excited toddler.
"Is this what I think it is Master Drake?"
"It sure is, its Twinkies (freshly picked today) and cream, with a light sprinkling of marshmallows just the way you like it!" Bobby grins proud of his culinary delights before handing Victor his bowl "Its frozen fish fingers and strawberry swirl ice cream."
Remy begins to gag at the end of the table, causing him to get kicked sharply in the shins by Rogue.
"For Remy you have spicy chicken ice cream pizza!!" Of all of Bobby's dishes this one looks the worst.
"What exactly are the spices in that er….dish?" Rogue asks feigning interest
"Pepper"
"Oh….right" Rogue just thinks herself lucky that she only got mint choc chip ice cream.
Other than Hank no one seems to be particularly enjoying the meal, they all offer the customary 'Thank you's' and 'it's delicious' except Logan who merely grunts.
"Seeing as you all enjoyed breakfast, how about you let me cook lunch?" Bobby offers his services excitedly
"Erm….nah your alright kid, Rogue volunteered earlier" Victor jumps in quickly, resulting in Remy being kicked under the table again because Rogue can't reach Victor, who's on the other end of the table.
"Oh ok…" Bobby looks crest fallen "…If your sure"
9:25AM
"They won't be asking me to cook dinner again, thank god!" Bobby chuckles to Hank "It seems operation 'Lazy Bobby' really worked out for me"
Hank pats Bobby on the back "I fear that your plan worked too well Robert, Remy hasn't stopped vomiting yet"
"It was a sacrifice I was willing to take"
11:17AM
Bobby and Hank have decided to set up a band called 'Hell Reaper', in which Bobby shall play the genetically modified drums (i.e. the metal dustbin and various pots and pans) and Hank is to be the lead comb player.
"You should play that note higher Hank" Bobby points out helpfully.
Hank looks at the comb "Robert you do realise that this is a comb covered in toilet paper"
Bobby looks at Hank witheringly "I'm not stupid Hank, just because I couldn't pour water out of that boot when there were instructions on the heel doesn't prove a thing."
Hank meekly shakes his head before continuing to blow on his comb.
11:41AM
Remy, Rogue and Victor have all joined 'Hell Reaper'. This leaves Logan (who was smoking a cigar when their decision to join was made) as the only housemate not involved in the band.
"Electro speed,
please take heed,
Busy bees make there sugah traps…"
Rogue wails, sorry sings, the lyrics that 'charm boi' /Remy has added to the music of the other 3 band members.
"Hey Hank, who would have thought that Victor would be such a natural on the spoons?" Bobby exclaims somewhat incredulously.
It is at this choice moment that Logan walks in, a sneer playing across his lips.
"What's up Creed? Ya like playin' kiddy games?"
"You'll be laughing on the other side of your face when we are an international rock act runt." It isn't, despite what the audience think, said spitefully.
"Yeh, I can see it now; the band consisting of the screecher, a comb, some pots and pans and some lanky idiot playing the spoons, hitting number one with a song written by…" Logan paused at a loss as to how to viciously describe Remy.
"Remy be the eye candy Mon brave"
"…an idiot who talks in third person all the bloody time!"
Suddenly Rogue caught up and screeched "HEY AH DO NOT SCREECH!"
11:51 AM
"Can I join your band?"
"What ah thought our band was pathetic?" Rogue 'screeches' at Logan.
Bobby decides to be a bit more tactful. "There aren't any other instruments we need sorry"
Logan pouts, staring pointedly at Bobby.
"Ok, ok you can be our groupie"
"I don't wanna be a groupie…I wanna be in t' band" Logan Whines at Bobby.
"Well every band needs a groupie Logan" Hank points out diplomatically.
Logan blinks back tears for a moment before attempting to throw his mutton chops over his shoulder as he marches to the diary room.
In the diary room
Logan is sat in the chair softly weeping
"What appears to be the problem Logan?"
"It's nothin'. I got summat in my eye" Logan paws at his eye, in a manner reminiscent of a bear.
There is silence for a moment.
"OK, ok stop with t' pressurin' me! I'll tell you. They don't want me in their band, yet Creeds allowed ta be in it and he's a cannibal. I can't help but feel that they prefer him ta me!" For the second time since entering the mansion Logan breaks down in tears. "Sorry it's this environment it's getting' ta me" He gasps between sobs, wiping his eyes with the back of his hand.
3:59 PM
To inject a bit of life into the mansion Big Brother has given the housemates a fortune telling crystal ball.
"I see mounds of flesh ahead of you Victor, and a love interest with Blue skin" Bobby is acting the part of the fortune teller, he is even dressed the part.
Victor looks rather startled at the last comment and steals a glance at Hank, who in turn moves slowly and cautiously away from Victor to the other side of the table.
"I also see a small mound of fat running towards as you prepare for battle, causing you to run into a van…a van with an RX emblazoned on the side. I also see you dressed up in your finest to attend a wedding, where you eat the person on your rights entrée, with an implement that might be a fork... might be a blind mans cane? Do we know any blind men?"
"Gawd ya can't take him anywhere" Rogue rolls her eyes.
"Come to think of it, any ideas as to what an entrée is?" Bobby asks looking confused.
Remy and Hank merely shrug.
"Is there anything else kid?" Victor asks leaning forward to peer into the crystal ball himself, but, alas, Bobby swats him away.
"The crystal ball also sees a long life for you yada yada yada" Bobby waves his hand dismissively. "Ok who's next?"
"Oh me! PICK ME!" Hank waves his hand in the air excitedly.
Bobby crack's his fingers. "Ok I'm seeing a big Blue lion who's name is Henry…do we know any Henrys?"
"That my name!" Hank exclaims
"Well there we go they've called a blue lion after you then." Bobby positively beams "You'll be famous!"
"What else do you see?"
"Ok as the fog clears I see a flame hitting your head, singeing your eyebrows. I see weeping in a sterile room, a room full of Twinkies"
"That's my lab" Hank nod's knowingly "What about love interests?"
"I see a void, a horrible gaping hole."
"What happened to Trish" Hank has begun to look rather frantic in his worry.
"Ohhhhh Hanks gotta girlfriend!" Rogue sing songs childishly.
"Yes I do as a matter of fact" Hank says looking rather proud (if his puffed out chest is anything to go by).
"I don't know, maybe she gets hit by a car or something" Bobby looks rather cheerful at this prospect. "Oh wait I see a tree, but not just any tree, the Twinkie tree becoming a long term, life long companion to you"
This seems to cheer up Hank a bit "My blessed Twinkies, I knew they wouldn't let me down"
Rogue pushes to the front of the throng of housemates awaiting a reading.
"Ahhh Rogue, I fore saw your arrival" Bobby leans forward and peers into the ball, making noises of approval, before addressing the 'crowd'. "I see love blossoming for this one, a love for the man of the cards. I also see a mop, a bucket and a very dirty floor. I sense great power in this one, a power Jedi master Xavier would be sad to lose…no, fly free young spirit of the skunk, run free"
With this Bobby makes shoeing motions at Rogue.
Wolverine steps forward cautiously as he eyes the crystal ball warily.
"What does it say bub?"
"Ok I see crazed fur ball sticking to your face, I see much peeing in the shower…what is this I see? Is that you frolicking in the fields naked with Scott?"
"No! It most certainly is not!" Logan edges away from the crystal ball as if it is excreting venom.
Remy jumps over the back of the chair and lands easily into the seat which Logan has just vacated.
"It be Remy's turn now" He says it matter of factly.
"Ok I see a cold place; it may be the freezer section in the 7 till 11 though." Bobby pauses before looking directly into Remy's Red on Black eyes. "Beware the ides of March!"
"Why?"
"I don't know I just always wanted to say it." Bobby shrugs before turning back to the crystal ball. "Ok I sense a change in your luck with the opposite sex…"
"You mean Remy will lose his touch"
"No, think of it more along the lines of finally gaining luck with women" Bobby is either deadpanning or totally serious the audience is not sure which; Remy however goes very red and refuses to hear anymore.
Bobby stands up and bows "That's it folks, I'm here until the end of the series though, so if you wish a repeat consultation please hesitate to come and find me when I'm in my Marshmallow tree"
Nomination Time
Bobby enters the diary room. It seems he is dressed as some kind of coconut creation in a brown hairy suit.
"Hey Big Brother!"
"Hello Bobby"
"Today I would like to vote for Logan because of his reaction earlier to 'Hell Reaper'. I feel that his criticism was both hurtful and uncalled for."
Big Brother can only just contain a gasp at Bobby's normal comment; it really was quite intelligent for him.
"My second nomination this time is for Remy. The reason behind this is that although I really like him, I can contemplate life in the mansion without him, I really don't think he would be missed that much."
"Thank you Bobby"
With that Bobby gets out of the chair and raises his fist in the air, before yelling; "ALL HAIL THE COCONUT KING!"
Hank is the next to enter the diary room; he is dressed in a gingham apron and is freshly back from gathering his Twinkie harvest.
"Good evening Big Brother. I shall cut straight to the chase, I am here today to nominate both Remy and Rogue because they clearly er… 'Dig each other' as Robert puts it, yet fail to accept this. I mean I can see it, you can see it, even Bobby can see it! It's about time they stopped pussy footing around each other and declared they're undying love for each other, in a similar fashion to Jane Eyre and Rochester I feel. I mean the Twinkie tree and the Marshmallow tree would be an excellent setting for such a display of affection, just as long as it isn't my beloved Twinkie tree that gets struck by lightening…"
"Ok Hank I get the picture…you may leave now"
Hank gets up huffily, grabbing his basket brimming with his favourite crop, and stomps from the room.
Logan enters the room with a cocktail stick stuck in his mutton chops.
"The Cajuns gotta go. Without him in the house I might finally get a bit o' action if ya know what I mean" Logan winks pointedly at the camera "I also wanna vote Creed off coz the guy is so false. " Logan growls at the mere thought of Victor before stomping off humming 'The sound of music' quietly
Remy wanders into the Diary room looking like a little lost sheep.
"Bonjour Big Brother" But he says it with a sigh "Today I would like to nominate Rogue because she is like the forbidden fruit, and while she is here I can not seem to engage in conversation with anybody else. The second person dat I want to nominate is that brat child Bobby for making me ill earlier."
Remy stares at the camera a moment as if what he has just said pains him, tears glisten in his eyes. Slowly he drags himself to his feet before exiting with a sigh.
Rogue enters casually, she is wearing a novelty t-shirt bearing the slogan 'Men~ Only Chocolate clings to your thighs faster'.
"Mah first nomination is for Logan because he was so rude about mah singin' today an' he has been actin' like a bear with a sore head for the last few days. Also ah would like ta nominate Hank because sometimes he plays the comb out of tune."
With that Rogue floats majestically from the room
Victor is the last one to nominate and enters the room like the last hobo, his hair can only be described as a birds nest in motion.
"First o' all I vote fer the runt cause he upset the young one earlier by being rude about the band. I also wanna vote fer that she witch Rogue, cause I don't feel she is coping with the pressure o' being in the house at this stage in the game an' I also don't know who else to nominate."
Announcement on who is up for eviction
"The housemates up for eviction this week are…"
Remy and Rogue cling to each other in anticipation before Rogue realises what she's doing and pushes him off, a little bit over zealously it must be said, sending him crashing into the coffee table. Logan looks at his reflection in his adamantium claws, picking some spinach from between his teeth, while Hank, Bobby and Victor are linked together by their hands.
"…In alphabetical order, are; Logan…"
A growl is heard from where Logan is sat but no emotions register on his face.
"… Remy…"
"Oh Merde!"
"… and Rogue."
Rogue looks around the room as if trying to figure out who nominated her, before stomping into the toilets.
"Well I think she took that well" Hank comments amiably
As I said to Rogue-Demon your imput really helps with the creation of this fic so keep it coming, also who d'ya want out, it's a tough decision for you lot this time…as from my observations the majority of you favour these 3 characters over poor ol' Victor and Hank. *Laughs demonically* And I promise not to try and let it go this long with out an update again!
*Ellie*