This was my first ever songfic. Errr... I don't know how I did. Please R&R and let me know so I can improve. G.N.
Disclaimer: They aren't mine.
Oh my baby, baby. I love you more than I can tell.
I don't think I can live without you.
And I know that I never will.
Oh my baby, baby. I want you so it scares me to death.
I can't say anymore than "I love you."
Everything else is a waste of breath.
Elliot reclined in his chair and took in Elvis Costello's deep voice. He had just received the CD for his birthday from his partner Olivia Benson, who was also a Costello fan. Elliot let out a low sigh. He hated this song. It reminded him of his love for Olivia and the jealousy it aroused.
But he wanted to listen to it anyway. Captain Cragen normally didn't allow CD players in the station, but it was a slow day and Elliot's birthday so he made an exception.
"I can't even say 'I love you," Elliot whispered as he peered across the room at his partner who was flirting with George Huang, the FBI psychiatrist. He felt the jealousy bubble inside of his heart.
I want you.
You've had your fun you don't get well no more.
I want you.
Your fingernails go dragging down the wall.
Be careful darling you might fall.
I want you.
I woke up and one of us was crying.
I want you.
You said "Young man I do believe you're dying."
I want you.
If you need a second opinion as you seem to do these days,
I want you.
You can look in my eyes and you can count the ways.
Elliot stared at Olivia and Huang again. Olivia was giggling and smiling. I remember when I used to make her smile, Elliot reminisced. It's harder for me to do nowadays.
I want you.
Did you mean to tell me but seem to forget?
I want you.
Since when were you so generous and articulate?
I want you.
It's the stupid details that my heart is breaking for.
It's the way your shoulders shake and what they're shaking for.
I want you.
It's knowing that he knows you after only guessing.
It's the thought of him undressing you or you undressing.
I can't believe she didn't tell me, Elliot thought. She used to tell me about all of her dates, why not the one with Huang last night? I hate the idea and maybe she knows it. But I want to know every single thing that happened, every word spoken, every kiss stolen. Huang doesn't even know the first thing about Olivia Benson. I know everything about her. I know who she is inside and out.
He watched Olivia blush as George complimented her. Elliot clenched his pencil in his hand tighter and tighter as he listened to the lyrics to try to fit them into his situation.
I want you.
He tossed some tattered compliment your way.
I want you.
And you were fool enough to love it when he said
"I want you".
Olivia smiled as she said farewell to George. Elliot imagined the plans that they had probably made for that night. Olivia walked over towards Elliot's desk.
I want you.
The truth can't hurt you; it's just like the dark.
It scares you witless,
But in time you see things clear and stark.
I want you.
Go on and hurt me then we'll let it drop.
I want you.
I'm afraid I won't know where to stop.
Go on and say it Olivia, Elliot said with his eyes. As much as I don't want to know I want to know even more. It's better if I hear it from you than from Munch or the Captain or even Huang himself.
"Hey El," Olivia said smiling. "I'm going out with George again tonight." She seemed absolutely thrilled.
"Oh really," Elliot paused his song. "Where are you going?"
"We're going to that Chinese place you and I go to all the time."
"That's great. That place is um... really great." He wanted to drown out any further conversation so he pressed play again and the words were sharp as they pounded into his ears.
I want you.
I want to know the things you did that we do too.
I want you.
I want to hear he pleases you more than I do.
I want you.
I might as well be useless for all it means to you.
I want you.
Did you call his name out as he held you down?
I want you.
Oh no my darling not with that clown.
"Did you and Huang... well..." Elliot asked. He had to know. He had to be hurt just a little more.
"Yes," Olivia answered flat out even though it wasn't any of Elliot's business.
Elliot was silent as he pushed play again and turned up the volume so he couldn't hear anything else.
I want you.
I want you.
You had your fun you don't get well no more.
I want you.
No one who wants you could want you more.
I want you.
I want you.
I want you.
Damn you Olivia. There is no doubt that I love you more than he ever could, Elliot mentally screamed.
Every night when I go off to bed and when I wake up...
I want you.
"Olivia?" Elliot said. Olivia turned around in her chair.
"Yes?"
"I want you," Elliot whispered.
"Excuse me?"
I'm going to say it once again 'till I instill it.
I know I'm going to feel this way until you kill it.
I want you.
"I want you."