Disclaimer: I do not own Gundam Wing. Please read and review. I keep all reveiws good and bad.
(Begin)
I do not know why I feel so sad.
Everyone is trying to keep me happy.
Everyone that is, except my Father.
I asked him a question and like always, he told me it all depends.
What does it depend on?
The type of question I wish to ask him?
I sometimes wish he was more clearer on what he means.
The rest of my family just states what they want to him.
Why do I have a hard time telling my father what I want?
Is it because I am the youngest and more is expected of me?
If that is the only reason then I do not think that it is fair.
Why can the oldest not be held more responsible then me?
Father yells at me for no reason sometimes and that hurts my feelings.
I was told that I do not care by him a couple weeks ago.
If I did not care, then I would not worry about him.
If I did not care about anything, then why are my feelings so hurt?
Sometimes I just want to give up and just get my life over with.
When I start to think that, I just sit here and think about everyone who might miss me.
I think about the people who I will never meet if I just end my life right now.
Sometimes I cannot handle the pressure that he puts on me because I am the youngest.
I sometimes wonder what he would do if I never existed.
Is my life supposed to be full if heartache and pain?
I try to be happy most of the time, but it is not working any longer.
I sit in my room by myself sometimes with tears just streaming down my face for no reason.
When that happens, I just feel even more alone.
I hate my life sometimes.
I miss having a normal life.
Why did I have to be the youngest with much more restrictions placed on me then what should be?
I give up and I cannot give in to my feelings of helplessness any longer.
I must be strong to help everyone in my family, including my father.
(Finish)
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