AUTHOR'S NOTES: Hmm, the muse has struck this week in force. Here's another chapter of Eva Matrix Regurgitated, I'm just about done with another chapter of Evolution, and I even knocked out a true "short" story over in the Inu-Yasha section! Better enjoy this while it lasts.

But...unfortunately the muse has not seen fit to strike me with inspiration on how to end Misato's Revenge. Other than Misato getting revenge. Feh, I'll figure out something.

Makoto looked at the screen. Shinji's signature had abruptly disappeared. "Where the hell did they go?"

Keiichi led Shinji into a corridor, closing the noodle shop's back door behind him. Shinji stared, amazed. The corridor stretched into infinity, filled with nothing but doors. Then it hit him. "Say, these are back doors, aren't they? Programmer access."

Keiichi nodded. "Yep."

"Kewl. So how do they work?"

"The code is hidden in tumblers. One position opens a lock. Another position opens one of these doors."

Huh, Shinji thought. That's pretty simple. Heck, I could be a programmer. And speaking of which... "Are you a programmer?" Shinji asked.

"Nope." Keiichi stopped at a door and inserted a key.

"Then what are you?"

Keiichi hesitated and looked over his shoulder at Shinji. "I protect that which matters most."

"You're Belldandy's boyfriend," Shinji smirked.

Keiichi smirked back smugly. "Oh, yeah."

"You're da man."

"Thanks." The two men went through the door and walked out onto the grounds of a temple shrine. It was much larger than the Oracle's old grounds, with several buildings centered around a sunken central area. On the far end from Shinji was a torii gate. Directly in front of him was the Oracle, Belldandy, seated cross-legged on a tatami mat. She held a bird in one hand, and was gently feeding it. Keiichi stood aside next to the open door.

"Well, hello Shinji," Belldandy suddenly spoke. Shinji jumped at the sound. "Come around here please...you know I won't bite." Shinji took a deep breath and walked over to the mat, standing in front and staring down at the once and future goddess. Belldandy hadn't changed at all, though she looked a little older, a little more tired. She gently tossed the bird into the air, where it took flight. Her hands flew cutely to her mouth. "Oh my, look at you!" She lightly brushed the hard armor of his plugsuit. "You look good, Third Child. Very good. So...how do you feel?"

"You're not going to take my temperature again, are you?" Shinji asked plantively.

"Oh, I don't think that's necessary. I know you're not sleeping," she said without preamble. Shinji blinked in surprise. Belldandy patted the mat next to her. "Who don't you sit down this time?"

He shook his head. "No, um, I think I'll stand."

Belldandy only smiled beatifically. "Okay." She began rummaging around in her picnic basket. Shinji, feeling a proper fool, abruptly sat down next to her. She looked back at him placidly.

"I felt like sitting," Shinji said, folding his arms across his chest and trying to look indifferent.

"I know." She pulled out a box of pocky and set it aside. "Well...let's get the obvious stuff out of the way."

Shinji looked into her soft, blue eyes. "You're not human."

Belldandy laughed. "It's tough to get any more obvious than that! So who am I?"

"If I had to guess, I'd say you're a goddess. I'm not sure about Keiichi, but offhand, I'd say he's not quite human either."

Belldandy's smile faded a little. "Not since Third Impact. Luckily I was able to shield him. But you're right, I am a goddess."

"Then if you're not human, you're part of the Eva Matrix. Another form of control." She nodded, still frustratingly smiling. Shinji had been half-hoping she'd deny everything, or even attack. Of course, if she knew what was going to happen, she might be smiling to get him going. He shook off those thoughts. "So if you're part of the Eva Matrix, that means you're part of what the Censors created! You...you're...you're family friendly!"

Belldandy looked at him with beautiful pity. "That's true, Shinji. It is a porcupine's dilemma, no doubt about it. The bad news is there's no way if you can really know whether I'm here to help you or not. So it's really up to you. You just have to make up your own damn mind to either accept what I tell you...or reject it." She held out a piece of strawberry pocky. "Want some?"

Shinji looked at the pocky suspiciously. "You already know if I'm gonna eat it."

"I wouldn't be a Class One goddess if I didn't, silly."

Shinji shook his head. "But if you already know, how can I make a choice?"

"Because you didn't come here to make the choice. You've already made it. You're here to try to understand why you made it."

Shinji took the pocky and munched on it. There was silence for a long minute, then he returned his attention to Belldandy. "I don't have a clue what you're talking about."

Belldandy sighed. "Neither do I."

"So why are you helping us–the otaku, I mean."

"We're all here to do what we're all here to do." The smile faded and Belldandy got serious. "Enough with the Zen. I'm interested in one thing: the future, and whether or not we have one together, Shinji...the otaku and the Censors. Because if we have no future together, we have no future."

Shinji finished the pocky. So that's it. She wants to bring peace between the two factions. Of course, a goddess would want that. But how? We've been fighting each other forever. "Are there other goddess like you?"

Belldandy stared at the sky, leaning backwards and letting her long legs stretch out in front of her. "My sisters, Urd and Skuld. Maybe Peorth...I don't know if she's made it this far. I haven't heard from her in awhile...but that's not the point, Shinji." She pointed at a murder of crows circling in the sky, which was more than a little ominous to Shinji. "See those birds? At some point, a program was written to govern them. A program was written to watch over the trees, the wind, the sunrise, the sunset, everything. There are programs running all over the place! The ones that do their job, what they were meant to do, they're invisible. You'd never even know they were here." She looked down, her grayish tresses partially hiding her features. "But the other ones....we hear about them all the time."

"I've never heard of them," Shinji protested, getting another stick of pocky.

"Sure you have. Every time you've heard someone say they saw a ghost, or a demon. Every story you've ever heard about vampires, werewolves, or hanyou is the Censors taking out some character that's doing something they're not supposed to be doing, at least according to them–getting killed, showing skin, whatever."

"Why?"

"Oh, they have their reasons. But it's usually that a character chooses manga reprints when it faces cancellation."

"So why is a program cancelled?"

"Bad ratings. Maybe the plot breaks down. Maybe the next new thing replaces it–happens all the time, and when it does, a character can either choose to hide here, inside the Eva Matrix, or return to the Director's Chair."

"The Censors' mainframe?"

"Yes...where you must go." Belldandy looked away. "Where the path of the Third Child ends."

Shinji put up his hands defensively. "Hey, now, wait a second, I like being the Third Child. I accept who I am, okay? Aw, man, I don't want to go through all that crap again!"

Belldandy kept speaking, as if she had not heard him. "You've seen it, haven't you? In your dreams? The door made of light?" Shinji turned pale, swallowed nervously, and nodded. "What happens when you go through the door?"

Shinji took a deep breath. He did not want to say it. He could not say it. Belldandy reached up and gently caressed his cheek. One look into her angelic face, and Shinji knew he could not deny her, not even the thing that frightened him the most. "I-I see Asuka," he stammered. "Something happens. Something bad. She starts to fall, and then I wake up. Then we usually end up having sex–"

Belldandy looked ill and put up a hand. That was a vision she could have done without. Except she had already seen it, salad tongs and all. "Um, yes, well...moving right along...do you see her die?"

"No," Shinji said.

"You have the Sight, Shinji. You can exist outside of time, like self-insertion characters."

"Then why can't I see what happens to her?" Shinji pleaded.

Belldandy folded her hands in her lap. "We can never see past the choices we don't understand, Shinji," she said softly. "Or want to make."

Shinji jumped to his feet and leveled an angry finger at her. "Are you saying I have to choose whether Asuka lives or dies?"

"No."

Shinji blew out his breath. "Oh. Well, kewl. That's a relief–"

"You've already made the choice, now you have to understand it."

Keiichi stuck his fingers in his ears as Shinji let the world know that Spike Spencer does his voice. "AAAAGHH! I'M SO DAMN CONFUSED!"

Belldandy smiled sweetly. "So's the audience, dear."

Shinji brought down his foot on the concrete, which cracked audibly. He turned away from Belldandy, folded his arms, and stuck his head low between his shoulders. "No. I can't do that. I won't!"

"You have to," Belldandy said.

"Make me."

"I don't have to, Shinji. You have to because you're the Third Child."

"Oh, great. The fate of the world depends on me, again." Shinji turned around. "This sucks. Okay, oh high and mighty Oracle Belldandy, She Who Sees All, what if I can't, huh? What are you going to then, if I fail? I'm not perfect, you know."

Belldandy sighed and got to her feet. "Then the Geofront falls, and everyone in it dies." That stopped Shinji in his tracks. She began to gather up her basket and the tatami. "Our time is up, Shinji, but you must hear me. You can save the Geofront, but you must go to the Director's Chair. To do that, you will need the Fleamaker."

"You mean the Keymaker."

"No, I mean the Fleamaker. His name is Myoga. He disappeared some time ago. We did not know what happened to him until just recently. That's why I sent for you." She handed the mat and the basket to Keiichi. "He's being held prisoner by a very dangerous character, one of the older anime characters. He is called the Backstabber, and he will not let Myoga go willingly."

Oh, great...the Backstabber. Sounds like a great guy to spend an afternoon with. This does suck. "What does he want with a damn flea?"

"What do all men with power want? More power. Being human, goddess, or alien doesn't make much difference." She reached into her kimono and pulled out a business card. On the front was a picture of a happy, chibi-version of Belldandy, with the words NEED A WISH? DIAL 1-900-GODDESS. IF YOU'RE WORTHY, WE'LL BE SEEING YOU. On the back was a time. "Be there, at that exact time, and you'll have a chance."

The crows fluttering around the shrine suddenly cawed and flew off as one. Keiichi looked more than a little worried. "We've got to go, Bell."

Belldandy nodded. She put her arms on Shinji's shoulders. "I'm sorry, Shinji. Every time we meet I've got nothing but bad news for you. You can do it, though. I have confidence in you. I believe in you, Shinji. We all do." She gave him a kiss on the cheek. "Good luck, Third Child." She bowed and retreated towards the doorway. "Oh, and by the way, you might want to leave...because someone scary is coming." With that, Keiichi gave him a thumbs-up and shut the door behind them.

"Someone scary," Shinji said, trying to find a place to put the card. The plugsuit didn't come with pockets. He finally stuck it down his collar. "I'll show 'em someone scary...darn goddesses, always got to be so cryptic. If I didn't know better, I'd say she'd been talking with my father." Shinji turned to leave, but then noticed that the air had gotten very still. The birds were gone. The people in the shrine had disappeared. He was alone.

No. He wasn't quite alone.

The doors in the temple on the far side slid open noiselessly. A female figure strode forth, underneath the torii gate. She shimmered in the pale sunlight, wearing a black fuku buttoned up in the front, her blond hair ending in two long, lustrous ponytails. Her black bootheels clicked loudly across the concrete. In her right hand twirled a heart-shaped scepter. Shinji could not see her eyes, but he knew they were a cold, icy blue, long since having lost any warmth.

"Mister Ikari!" Serena, the Scout Formerly Known as Moon, called out. "Did you get my package?"

Shinji turned and brought his hands up midway, balancing on the balls of his feet. He doubted she was here to make amends or sell cookies. "Yeah."

"Well, why aren't you wearing it?" She pointed to the plugsuit. "But I suppose it doesn't go with that." She smiled without a trace of humor. "Surprised to see me?"

"No." Which was true. Shinji had expected this moment for the last four days.

"Then you're aware of it."

"Of what?"

Serena rolled her eyes behind the sunglasses. "Durrh! Our connection. I don't fully understand how it happened, and it's got nothing to do with the fact that I'm a blonde. Perhaps some part of you imprinted on me, maybe the cel inks ran together, or something. Anyways, doesn't matter...what does is that whatever happened, happened for a reason."

"And what reason is that?"

Serena narrowed her eyes. "You're Gendo's kid, all right. Answer everything with a question. Well, I've got a question for you, Mister Smarty Plugsuit. I killed you, Mister Ikari. I watched you die." She looked at the scepter. "With a certain satisfaction, I might add. But then something happened. Something bad. Something I call no way on, but it happened anyway. You destroyed me, Mister Ikari. Blew me up and turned me into little Moonie chunks." She shrugged. "Afterward, I knew the rules. No more Serena, no more ratings, time to get consigned to reprints and fanfics. I knew what I was supposed to do, but guess what? I didn't do it. I was compelled to stay, be a bad little girl, and disobey." She gave a sort of half-curtsey. "And now here I stand because of you, Mister Ikari. Because of you I'm no longer an Agent Scout–lost my pen and everything–because of you I've changed." She motioned to her throat, where the blood-red bowtie had once been. "I'm unplugged. A new girl, so to speak, like you–"

"I'm no girl," Shinji protested.

"Okay, fine, a new person, like you, apparently free."

Shinji's eyebrows went up. He stepped forward and stuck out a hand. "Hey, congratulations, Serena! I knew you were okay at heart."

She stuck her nose in the air and refused to shake his hand. "Hmpf. Thanks a whole lot." She peered at him over the top of her glasses. "But as you well know, Mister Ikari, appearances can be deceiving, which brings me back to the reason we're here. We're not here because we're free, we're here because we're not free." Her eyebrows beetled together. "'We're not here because we're free, we're here because we're not free'...that doesn't make any damn sense." She shrugged. "Oh, well. It's my purpose–because as we both know, without a purpose, we wouldn't be here, right?"

"Right!" Shinji spun at the sound of another voice. His eyes nearly bugged out when he saw another Serena walk from the shrine building to his right. "It's purpose that creates us!"

"Purpose that connects us!" Shinji whirled to his left as another Serena came out of the shrine building there.

"Purpose that guides us!" This one came from behind.

"That drives us!" Serena Number Five appeared from the northwest.

"That pulls us!" From the southeast.

"It is purpose that defines us!" Shinji leaped backwards as a Serena came up out of the ground.

"Purpose that binds us!" He was nearly driven into the ground face first as a final Serena dropped out of the sky.

"Wuh–buh–" Shinji stammered.

"We're here because of you, Mister Ikari," the first Serena said. "We're here to take from you what you tried to take from us–and you did it on purpose, you big meanie!" And with that, she stabbed Shinji in the chest with her scepter.

(Ooh, cliffhanger! I LOVE doing that. But...aw, heck, you've seen the movie. Next time, fanboys rejoice, because you're going to see...er, read about hundreds of Sailor Moons!)