Disclaimer: You know. You all know.

Reaka: Hey everyone! Here's the fourth chapter of Ron Weasley Kills! In this chapter, you will find out what the hell it is that allows SpongeBob to brainwash everyone into liking his show. The secret shall be revealed! But first!

To the Reviewers!

Reese Craven: Yes, Reese, we must start that project soon! I'm glad you liked it.

I understand that there were technical difficulties around the time that I uploaded this fic, meaning a lot of you weren't able to review. I'm going to thank you for reading that chapter anyway. So, thank you.

Warning! (Unless you're really, really dim-witted you can skip over this.) I really don't like SpongeBob so I insult him a lot. If you like SpongeBob and are very sensitive to people slamming him, don't read. This chapter might be the worst for that.

Now, on with the chapter!

The Secret to the Brainwashing

The gillyweed, by far, had now become one of Ron's favorite magical plants. He was glad that it allowed him to breathe underwater instead of having to swim the whole time with his nose plugged. It was a really good change.

He felt someone grab his arm, and he almost screamed as he was being tugged. But it was only Snape trying to guide him into the right direction.

On the bottom of the ocean, there was a big, glowing bubble with, what looked like, a pineapple in the middle of it. Ron looked at Snape, and the Potions Master nodded. That was their pineapple under the sea that they needed to go to. Ron gulped, and the two heroes dove to the depths to save the world and their friends.

Inside of his hideout, SpongeBob laughed like a maniac as he watched Hermione struggle to get out of her chamber. In a few minutes, she was to be drowned in his merchandise. And that was a death of all deaths.

"Come on now, Hermione," SpongeBob coaxed. "All you have to do is join the dark side, and watch me on TV. I may be a big, retarded, sponge with a laugh that sounds suspiciously like a goat with a hernia, but everyone else likes it! Join us! Look at Mr. Potter! He's enjoying himself."

Harry sat in the chair in the middle of his drowning chamber looking amused at everything. Once he noticed SpongeBob was looking at him, he waved.

"Can I have your autograph?" Harry called.

"I don't get it," Hermione said. "You're the dumbest thing to ever be on TV. The show sucks! But how did you get so popular?"

"How you ask?" the yellow square repeated. "I'll tell you. Only you and I will know this secret."

SpongeBob reached in his pocket and pulled out a (twitch) Crabby Pattie. It was glowing with an evil light.

"My show is nothing but a big piece of crap," it explained. "I'll be the first to admit that. It's not funny, and my laugh is annoying. But, with help from the evil Lord Voldemort, I was able to take one of my overrated Crabby Patties and make it a brainwashing item. It'll show up for a split second right before an episode of my show comes on, and once the opening theme song starts playing, and after I do that embarrassing thing with my nose, everyone is brainwashed and loving it!"

After saying that monologue, he proceeded on doing the annoying, strangled sheep laugh. Hermione cringed.

"In return for his assistance, I brainwashed Lord Voldemort into liking it. This showed me that not even the wizards and witches could resist the power. Even the famous Harry Potter is reduced to nothing," he continued. " And soon, I shall rid the world of the only one that's immune to the brainwashing."

"Ron," Hermione said.

"That's right," SpongeBob said. "Mr. Weasley has turned into quite the nuisance in my world domination plan. But once he sees you and Harry drowned in my merchandise, he'll be helpless! And you know what I'll do? I'll kill him with Avada Kedavera!"

"But you have to be a wizard to do that!" Hermione protested. "You won't be able to do it! You lost there, you moronic invertebrate!"

"Oh, but you're wrong," said the sponge. He pulled a wand out from his pocket.

"I am a wizard!" he exclaimed. "And soon, I'll be the most powerful one in the world! I've gotten rid of Harry Potter and Voldemort. Now all that's left is Albus Dumbledore and Ron Weasley. Then I'll be invincible!"

"You won't win!" Hermione said. "Dumbledore's too smart to fall into trickery like that! Nice try!"

"I've had enough of your insolence!" SpongeBob yelled. He walked over to his crystal ball and looked inside. Ron and Snape were closing in on the pineapple.

"Severus Snape is immune?" he asked.

"Bet you didn't see that coming, did you?" Hermione asked.

"You knew!" the sponge yelled. "Patrick! Squidward! It's time we drowned our guests in my merchandise!"

The starfish went towards Harry, and the squid went to Hermione. Harry looked at Patrick and waved once he stepped inside.

"Hello!" Harry said cheerfully. "You've always been my favorite character. You're so funny!"

Patrick took no heed as he chained Harry's arms to the wall. Then he went to his legs.

"Hey, what are you doing?" Harry asked, suddenly afraid. "Hermione! What's going on?! Are they going to kill us? Hermione!"

Hermione, herself, was keeping her distance from the squid whose voice was more annoying than the author's sister. She drew her wand and sent curses and hexes to him, but none of them worked.

"You can't win!" she yelled. "Even Harry knows you're evil now! Give it up! When Ron comes, you'll be dead anyway!"

Suddenly, a tentacle shot at her, and Hermione fell. Squidward caught her and started to chain her up just as Patrick chained up Harry. Both of SpongeBob's minions stepped out of the chambers. SpongeBob looked at Hermione.

"I was hoping I'd hear you scream when I drowned you," he said. "but if all you're going to do is remind me how much I suck, then it's not worth it. Harry's screams are much better. Let the drowning begin!"

Stuffed SpongeBobs started falling in Harry and Hermione's prisons.

Ron and Snape made it to the bottom of the ocean and went right through the air bubble.

"That was different," Ron said.

"He must have a charm on his home so he can do that," Snape said. "Be on your guard, Weasley. We'll be lucky if he doesn't know of my presence, but he's mainly after you. I can't guarantee I'll be able to watch your ass all the time."

"The way you said it, I don't want you to," Ron replied.

Suddenly, the door to the pineapple opened, and Patrick and Squidward walked out. Snape and Ron prepared to draw their wands.

"If you want to get to your friends," Squidward said, "you'll have to get through us."

"We'll consider that a challenge," Snape replied. "Right Weasley?"

"Sure," Ron answered.

They drew their wands.

What will happen next? Will Ron and Snape get through Patrick and Squidward to get to Harry and Hermione on time? Will SpongeBob be killed? What'll happen to the Crabby Patty if he dies? Was Albus Dumbledore affected by SpongeBob?

Actually, I can answer that one!

Dumbledore sat in his office at Hogwarts when a bunch of owls flew in through his open window. Between them, a large package was being carried. Curiously, Dumbledore opened it. It was a small TV. Once he figured out how it worked, Dumbledore turned it on. SpongeBob Square Pants started playing!

Quickly, Dumbledore turned off the TV.

"I will not let myself watch that evil," he said. "That's worse than...a porno starring me."

But, suddenly, the TV turned on again on its own. The evil, theme music started to play again. Dumbledore screamed in agony.

Does this mean it could be the end of the world? Do Snape and Ron really love each other?

Snape and Ron: WE'RE NOT GAY!

Reaka: I know! I just had to put that. But I think you guys would make a very interesting couple though. Don't you think?

The two of them proceed to give me the finger.

Well, okay. The battle scene is coming up next, so you better be patient! The next one will have very careful planning. Till then, see you!