Thank you SOOOOOOO much to the people who reviewed! I really appreciate it.
And the reviews were just bew-ti-ful! *sobs into hankerchief *.
Oh, and I didn't realise that my 'will not accept anonymous reviewers' box
was ticked. The lovely Gabriel4 alerted me to that, bless her. So a
thousand apologies to those anonymous people who might've read this and
wanted to review – but were prevented from doing so my silly ole me. Please
review now.
To Chess: Glad you think this little fic's funny. Yeah, poor little Flitwick. So young to be a runt. *wipes away tears. * You love Snape? I don't. I absoloutely loved making fun of him – hehehe. Hope u'll keep reviewing.
To Gabriel4: Thanx for the great comments and advice. I know I whined like crazy last chapter and I was ashamed of it later. Thank you so much for alerting me to the fact that I didn't accept anonymous reviews. You're an angel (hehehe like the pun?) I cringe when people ask for a certain number of reviews in exchange for continuing a story – I'd never do that though. Whine as I did I mean to continue whether or not I get reviews! Will Flitwick's plan backfire? Wait and see my friend, wait and see...
To gloredhel28: The name Alganon is not mentioned in JK's books. I wanted a first name for Flitwick so me and my sister came up with 'Alganon.' Do you like? Anyways, glad to hear from you and hope u'll keep reviewing!
The Chocolate Frog: Thank ye for them kind words lady. Yeh warmed the cockles of this old author's heart. Well, I'm not really old but you get the idea....
Traveling Pants: Will you really? Ooohh it's nice to think that I have that much power over my readers (just joking). Glad you like the story and I 'preciate those pretty compliments of yours.
And FlamezFlyer and Marissa Ann, what happened to you guys?
OK, now that I've expressed my gratitude....
Here's more Flitwick!
* * * * * * * *
Melissa Longbottom looked curiously at Professor Flitwick as he passed her in the Charms corridor, whistling happily.
"Good afternoon, Miss Longbottom!"
She liked him the most out of all her teachers, though she wasn't very good at Charms. She shared her father's passion for Herbology, but she didn't exactly admire Professor Frommage, the French Herbology teacher. Professor Sprout, the teacher who had taught Herbology in her father's days at Hogwarts, had retired.
Professor Flitwick had always seemed so – so cheerful and nice and good- natured. He was tolerant of the various pranks she liked to pull in class. He had a sense of humor.
Except, it seemed, when students decided to levitate him in mid-air.
She thought that Betram really had gone too far on that one. After all, there was such things as dignity.
How can you talk! she told herself, didn't you expose Snape's, ahem, unfortunate lack of hair growth?
She giggled in spite of herself. She knew she had gotten her fellow classmates into loads of trouble and all...but it was hard to feel sorry for doing what she did when she remembered all the times Snape had humiliated HER in front of the class.
"It was worth losing the points," James Potter had told her, snorting with laughter, "I'd give a hundred Galleons to see Snape running around trying to catch his wig – and to see his face when it flew off!."
"Is there something you find amusing, Miss Longbottom?" Professor Flitwick had paused and turned to look at her.
"No – nothing Professor!" she hastened to say. "At least, nothing about you."
She didn't really fancy the idea of being turned into a rooster.
He smiled.
"Don't worry!" he squeaked, "I'm not going to lose my temper again! I was just having a bad day."
"Well, Professor Snape just had a – well, a bad HAIR day, you could call it," chortled Melissa, and stopped.
But he chuckled as well.
"Yes, I heard about that, er, unfortunate incident. So poor Severus is bald. Such a shame." He didn't sound particularly sad. "I expect he was livid?"
"Oh yes," Melissa nodded seriously, "He took fifty points off all of us and took me to the headmaster. He wanted Dumbledore – I mean, Professor Dumbledore to expell me, he was so angry."
"But I take it he didn't?" Professor Flitwick's eyes twinkled.
Melissa grinned. "No. He said that he thought fifty house points was enough. After all, I hadn't actually MEANT to take his wig off! And he also said that he thought Professor Snape should learn to accept his baldness and not wear the toupee!"
"And what did Severus say to that?" Flitwick was obviously enjoying what he was hearing.
"He scowled and said he wanted all our memories modified. Then Dumbledore said he was being silly and that he shouldn't let children get to him like that! But I think he's more annoyed because it's us who found out then if it had been a teacher!" Matilda finished, laughing.
Flitwick joined in. "I should think he would be!"
Then Melissa thought of something.
"You know, Professor, a strange thing happened down in the dungeons. Besides finding out that Professor Snape's bald, I mean. "
"And what was that, my dear?" Flitwick inquired, peering avidly up at her.
"Well, when I took the toupee off, it flew around for a bit, then landed ontop of a stone shelf. You know, the ones with those jars full of horrible slimy things in them?"
Prof. Flitwick's shudder told her he knew.
"Then," Melissa went on, "Professor Snape tried to reach for it. And he couldn't. It's funny, because he's so tall. He tried and tried and couldn't reach." It had been quite amusing, actually.
"And there was something weird about him as well, when he came in. He looked...shorter."
Professor Flitwick gave a sudden little jump of glee. Melissa looked at him, and he coughed.
"Do go on. Don't mind me."
Melissa spread her hands and shrugged.
"I don't know. It was just weird." She looked at her watch and yelped.
"I'm going to be late for Transfiguration! Bye, Professor!"
She hurried around a corner and out of sight.
If she'd paused to look over her shoulder, she would have seen Alganon Flitwick dancing a very un-teacherish war-dance of triumph next to a painting of the Lady Florena, while the lady in question looked disapprovingly down at him from under her lace cap.
* * * * * * * *
It was working! It was working! It was working!
Now Professor Flitwick didn't normally gloat. But this was too good an opportunity to miss.
So he danced around his cauldron twice, looking for all the world like that scheming dwarf Rumpelstiltskin – in fact, Rumpel may have been an ancestor of Flitwick's.
"Revenge is sweet," he said happily. "I never knew just how sweet it could be!"
There was a sharp, loud knock on the door of his office, that made him jump.
Over his many years at Hogwarts he had learned to recognize knocks. The soft, hesitant knock of a student. The brisk tap of Minerva McGonagall. The sharp, loud, unrelenting knock of Severus Snape.
"Come in," called Professor Flitwick, hopping onto his desk and looking expectant. Though it was an entirely unconscious act, he normally sat on his desk whenever Snape paid him a visit so as to boost his height and self- esteem.
The door was flung open, and Severus Snape stood there, tall and imposing, eyes flashing and mouth pulled into a hard line of anger.
He also had hair.
* * * * * * * *
For a moment Flitwick wondered whether grim-faced colleague had found out his great plan. Though how he could've was mind-boggling.
Then Snape said, sneering, "I require your assistance, Alganon."
Professor Flitwick gave an inward sigh of relief.
"Certainly, Severus. What can I do for you?"
Snape opened his mouth, then closed it. Opened it again, and closed it again. When he finally spoke, it was with difficulty and as if each word cost him Galleons.
"You – have – heard – of – a – recent – mishap – that - occurred – in – my – classroom?"
"A mishap?" Flitwick said politely, swinging his legs. He knew exactly what Snape was talking about, but he couldn't help enjoying his discomfort.
"Yes," Snape said jerkily, "A – Gryffindor student. Melissa Longbottom. Played – a – nasty – trick – on – me."
"Oh, THAT mishap," Flitwick said, as if he had heard of about a dozen that day.
"Yes. Charms are – your field of expertise. I was wondering – if you, that is – if you could – give me a Permanent Sticking Charm."
"And what would you be needing it for?"
Snape gritted his teeth.
"To – to keep my – my – toupee in place. Permanently."
"Why, of course I will!" Flitwick jumped off the desk, and turned to his shelf, glad to conceal his grin from Snape's eyes.
He pulled a small purple silk packet out of a green box and presented it to Snape.
"Thank you." Snape said coldly. Then, as if needing to gather up his lost dignity, he said:
"That shelf is rather low, isn't it Alganon? Of course, you need it that way."
Professor Flitwick surveyed his colleague calmly.
"Of course I do."
Then Snape said a strange thing.
"Is this magic?" he waved the purple packet.
Professor Flitwick blinked.
"Of course it is."
Snape shook himself and repeated, "Of course it is."
Then he swept out of the room without even saying thank you.
* * * * * *
Lord Gobblygoop was bored. He had also eaten a whole box of Chameleon's Best Liquor Chocolates. One of his Death Bandits had carelessly given him a box for his birthday.
The days of Lord Voldemort were long over. This was the time of Lord Gobblygoop – famously evil, people screaming with fear whenever they heard his name, the whole world trembling at his feet.
In his dreams anyway.
In reality, he had about five Death Bandits as supporters, worked at Madame Malkin's, could barely do a Summoning Charm, and had no girlfriend.
It was a tough life.
But that was all going to change!
Lord Gobblygoop sat up, his bloodshot eyes wide and bulging slightly.
It was time for him to make his debut as a Famously Evil Dark Lord.
"Roo-dolf!" he grunted.
A small, monkey-faced little man hopped into the room.
"I have a plan for my debut as a Famously Evil Dark Lord!" Lord Gobblygoop told him.
"Oh, very good sir!" chirped the little man.
"I need a map."
"Oh very good sir!" the little man ran and fetched a map.
Lord Gobblygoop leaned over it, muttering inanely. Finally he poked a spot.
"THAT'S where I'm going to do it!" he announced.
"Oh, very good sir!"
"Shut up!" roared his master.
"Oh very good sir!"
Lord Gobblygoop lurched across at Roo-dolf, trying to throttle him.
"I'm going to strangle you till you're purple and blue!"
"Oh, very good sir!"
* * * * * * * *
Voila! By the by, school's started which means....you guessed it....HOMEWORK. Therefore I won't be able to update real quickly.
By the by again, I have a new nickname! Silver Stockings is my name and – er – writing fan fictions is my game! Yeah, that sounds good!
Dumdahdumdum.
What are you guys waiting for?
REVIEWS RULE! YEAH!
~ S.S~
To Chess: Glad you think this little fic's funny. Yeah, poor little Flitwick. So young to be a runt. *wipes away tears. * You love Snape? I don't. I absoloutely loved making fun of him – hehehe. Hope u'll keep reviewing.
To Gabriel4: Thanx for the great comments and advice. I know I whined like crazy last chapter and I was ashamed of it later. Thank you so much for alerting me to the fact that I didn't accept anonymous reviews. You're an angel (hehehe like the pun?) I cringe when people ask for a certain number of reviews in exchange for continuing a story – I'd never do that though. Whine as I did I mean to continue whether or not I get reviews! Will Flitwick's plan backfire? Wait and see my friend, wait and see...
To gloredhel28: The name Alganon is not mentioned in JK's books. I wanted a first name for Flitwick so me and my sister came up with 'Alganon.' Do you like? Anyways, glad to hear from you and hope u'll keep reviewing!
The Chocolate Frog: Thank ye for them kind words lady. Yeh warmed the cockles of this old author's heart. Well, I'm not really old but you get the idea....
Traveling Pants: Will you really? Ooohh it's nice to think that I have that much power over my readers (just joking). Glad you like the story and I 'preciate those pretty compliments of yours.
And FlamezFlyer and Marissa Ann, what happened to you guys?
OK, now that I've expressed my gratitude....
Here's more Flitwick!
* * * * * * * *
Melissa Longbottom looked curiously at Professor Flitwick as he passed her in the Charms corridor, whistling happily.
"Good afternoon, Miss Longbottom!"
She liked him the most out of all her teachers, though she wasn't very good at Charms. She shared her father's passion for Herbology, but she didn't exactly admire Professor Frommage, the French Herbology teacher. Professor Sprout, the teacher who had taught Herbology in her father's days at Hogwarts, had retired.
Professor Flitwick had always seemed so – so cheerful and nice and good- natured. He was tolerant of the various pranks she liked to pull in class. He had a sense of humor.
Except, it seemed, when students decided to levitate him in mid-air.
She thought that Betram really had gone too far on that one. After all, there was such things as dignity.
How can you talk! she told herself, didn't you expose Snape's, ahem, unfortunate lack of hair growth?
She giggled in spite of herself. She knew she had gotten her fellow classmates into loads of trouble and all...but it was hard to feel sorry for doing what she did when she remembered all the times Snape had humiliated HER in front of the class.
"It was worth losing the points," James Potter had told her, snorting with laughter, "I'd give a hundred Galleons to see Snape running around trying to catch his wig – and to see his face when it flew off!."
"Is there something you find amusing, Miss Longbottom?" Professor Flitwick had paused and turned to look at her.
"No – nothing Professor!" she hastened to say. "At least, nothing about you."
She didn't really fancy the idea of being turned into a rooster.
He smiled.
"Don't worry!" he squeaked, "I'm not going to lose my temper again! I was just having a bad day."
"Well, Professor Snape just had a – well, a bad HAIR day, you could call it," chortled Melissa, and stopped.
But he chuckled as well.
"Yes, I heard about that, er, unfortunate incident. So poor Severus is bald. Such a shame." He didn't sound particularly sad. "I expect he was livid?"
"Oh yes," Melissa nodded seriously, "He took fifty points off all of us and took me to the headmaster. He wanted Dumbledore – I mean, Professor Dumbledore to expell me, he was so angry."
"But I take it he didn't?" Professor Flitwick's eyes twinkled.
Melissa grinned. "No. He said that he thought fifty house points was enough. After all, I hadn't actually MEANT to take his wig off! And he also said that he thought Professor Snape should learn to accept his baldness and not wear the toupee!"
"And what did Severus say to that?" Flitwick was obviously enjoying what he was hearing.
"He scowled and said he wanted all our memories modified. Then Dumbledore said he was being silly and that he shouldn't let children get to him like that! But I think he's more annoyed because it's us who found out then if it had been a teacher!" Matilda finished, laughing.
Flitwick joined in. "I should think he would be!"
Then Melissa thought of something.
"You know, Professor, a strange thing happened down in the dungeons. Besides finding out that Professor Snape's bald, I mean. "
"And what was that, my dear?" Flitwick inquired, peering avidly up at her.
"Well, when I took the toupee off, it flew around for a bit, then landed ontop of a stone shelf. You know, the ones with those jars full of horrible slimy things in them?"
Prof. Flitwick's shudder told her he knew.
"Then," Melissa went on, "Professor Snape tried to reach for it. And he couldn't. It's funny, because he's so tall. He tried and tried and couldn't reach." It had been quite amusing, actually.
"And there was something weird about him as well, when he came in. He looked...shorter."
Professor Flitwick gave a sudden little jump of glee. Melissa looked at him, and he coughed.
"Do go on. Don't mind me."
Melissa spread her hands and shrugged.
"I don't know. It was just weird." She looked at her watch and yelped.
"I'm going to be late for Transfiguration! Bye, Professor!"
She hurried around a corner and out of sight.
If she'd paused to look over her shoulder, she would have seen Alganon Flitwick dancing a very un-teacherish war-dance of triumph next to a painting of the Lady Florena, while the lady in question looked disapprovingly down at him from under her lace cap.
* * * * * * * *
It was working! It was working! It was working!
Now Professor Flitwick didn't normally gloat. But this was too good an opportunity to miss.
So he danced around his cauldron twice, looking for all the world like that scheming dwarf Rumpelstiltskin – in fact, Rumpel may have been an ancestor of Flitwick's.
"Revenge is sweet," he said happily. "I never knew just how sweet it could be!"
There was a sharp, loud knock on the door of his office, that made him jump.
Over his many years at Hogwarts he had learned to recognize knocks. The soft, hesitant knock of a student. The brisk tap of Minerva McGonagall. The sharp, loud, unrelenting knock of Severus Snape.
"Come in," called Professor Flitwick, hopping onto his desk and looking expectant. Though it was an entirely unconscious act, he normally sat on his desk whenever Snape paid him a visit so as to boost his height and self- esteem.
The door was flung open, and Severus Snape stood there, tall and imposing, eyes flashing and mouth pulled into a hard line of anger.
He also had hair.
* * * * * * * *
For a moment Flitwick wondered whether grim-faced colleague had found out his great plan. Though how he could've was mind-boggling.
Then Snape said, sneering, "I require your assistance, Alganon."
Professor Flitwick gave an inward sigh of relief.
"Certainly, Severus. What can I do for you?"
Snape opened his mouth, then closed it. Opened it again, and closed it again. When he finally spoke, it was with difficulty and as if each word cost him Galleons.
"You – have – heard – of – a – recent – mishap – that - occurred – in – my – classroom?"
"A mishap?" Flitwick said politely, swinging his legs. He knew exactly what Snape was talking about, but he couldn't help enjoying his discomfort.
"Yes," Snape said jerkily, "A – Gryffindor student. Melissa Longbottom. Played – a – nasty – trick – on – me."
"Oh, THAT mishap," Flitwick said, as if he had heard of about a dozen that day.
"Yes. Charms are – your field of expertise. I was wondering – if you, that is – if you could – give me a Permanent Sticking Charm."
"And what would you be needing it for?"
Snape gritted his teeth.
"To – to keep my – my – toupee in place. Permanently."
"Why, of course I will!" Flitwick jumped off the desk, and turned to his shelf, glad to conceal his grin from Snape's eyes.
He pulled a small purple silk packet out of a green box and presented it to Snape.
"Thank you." Snape said coldly. Then, as if needing to gather up his lost dignity, he said:
"That shelf is rather low, isn't it Alganon? Of course, you need it that way."
Professor Flitwick surveyed his colleague calmly.
"Of course I do."
Then Snape said a strange thing.
"Is this magic?" he waved the purple packet.
Professor Flitwick blinked.
"Of course it is."
Snape shook himself and repeated, "Of course it is."
Then he swept out of the room without even saying thank you.
* * * * * *
Lord Gobblygoop was bored. He had also eaten a whole box of Chameleon's Best Liquor Chocolates. One of his Death Bandits had carelessly given him a box for his birthday.
The days of Lord Voldemort were long over. This was the time of Lord Gobblygoop – famously evil, people screaming with fear whenever they heard his name, the whole world trembling at his feet.
In his dreams anyway.
In reality, he had about five Death Bandits as supporters, worked at Madame Malkin's, could barely do a Summoning Charm, and had no girlfriend.
It was a tough life.
But that was all going to change!
Lord Gobblygoop sat up, his bloodshot eyes wide and bulging slightly.
It was time for him to make his debut as a Famously Evil Dark Lord.
"Roo-dolf!" he grunted.
A small, monkey-faced little man hopped into the room.
"I have a plan for my debut as a Famously Evil Dark Lord!" Lord Gobblygoop told him.
"Oh, very good sir!" chirped the little man.
"I need a map."
"Oh very good sir!" the little man ran and fetched a map.
Lord Gobblygoop leaned over it, muttering inanely. Finally he poked a spot.
"THAT'S where I'm going to do it!" he announced.
"Oh, very good sir!"
"Shut up!" roared his master.
"Oh very good sir!"
Lord Gobblygoop lurched across at Roo-dolf, trying to throttle him.
"I'm going to strangle you till you're purple and blue!"
"Oh, very good sir!"
* * * * * * * *
Voila! By the by, school's started which means....you guessed it....HOMEWORK. Therefore I won't be able to update real quickly.
By the by again, I have a new nickname! Silver Stockings is my name and – er – writing fan fictions is my game! Yeah, that sounds good!
Dumdahdumdum.
What are you guys waiting for?
REVIEWS RULE! YEAH!
~ S.S~