Disclaimer: Hey- I've got the Golden Gate Bridge for cheap! Interested?
A/T: ...sigh I don't know what it is, but I'm having a complete mental block. I'm not sure where I want to go with this, but lo! I shan't give up! I'll fight the good fight, I don't care if I die here at the keyboard- you've been waiting and I'm here to deliver. My new mantra? Never give up- NEVER SURRENDER! Only one more chapter and an already written epilogue to go!
Alley of Dreams
Act 9: Glow and Tarnish
Ginny was positively glowing, to say the least. Harry watched her from a distance as he and the others waited for her to drag her somewhat timid husband-to-be from their Muggle car, obviously thrilled at being at her very own wedding rehearsal.
"Hello Harry," she said, smiling radiantly and giving Harry a big hug and a small peck on the cheek. "I'm so happy you could make it!"
She gave Sirius, Remus, and Oliver the same loving treatment and Neville followed her, nodding and shaking hands with the three wizards, a little more than terrified.
"Look at the lucky man," said Sirius, winking at Neville. "Shaking in his boots."
Neville grinned, his face tinting a bit. "Yes, well, what can I say? I'm at my own wedding rehearsal. With all these people. Lots of folks, did you see them all? I'd suggested a small wedding with no one but us and a priest, but Ginny-''
"I said absolutely no way. This is going to be my one and only wedding. I want my family to be there, my classmates, my teachers, everyone! It'll be the wedding of the century!"
Neville nodded, somewhat somberly. "But Ginny wanted the wedding of the century," he finished. "And I said as long as I get to marry her..."
She smiled at his confession, even brighter than before. "Isn't he the catch?" she asked, giving him a quick kiss before shrugging off her coat.
"Oh, absolutely," replied Remus, nodding his head in his agreement. "I'd just wish Sirius were so quiet and calm."
Sirius gave him a look. "Highly unappreciated, darling."
"My apologies, sweetheart."
"So what made you decide to get married on Christmas Eve?" Harry asked, shaking his head at his Godfather's antics before turning to Ginny again.
Ginny looked thoughtful. "I don't know. I guess we just loved the weather, the atmosphere, Christmas itself... very romantic. Hermione suggested it, and I've made it my business to always take her advice. Speaking of which, I forgot to ask," she said, hanging her coat and purse on a nearby coat rack. "What did you think of my book, Black Cat's Castle?"
Harry bit his tongue, realizing that his inability to keep up with the times was going to bite him on the bum.
"Fantastic, no other word to describe it! I loved how you depicted the castle and the characters were so mysterious. It had magnificent atmosphere. Where do you get your book ideas anyway?" he asked, praying he was picking the right phrases to get him through the conversation.
Ginny smiled and he deflated.
"I never wrote a book called Black Cat's Castle, Harry."
Harry had the decency to look ashamed. "I'm really sorry Ginny, I've only read your first one. I've been taking care of Cedric and everything... so what is the last book you wrote? I promise to buy it the moment I get out of today's rehearsal."
She smiled again.
"Never change, Harry. I don't mind whether you read my silly books or not. It was just a friendly test, to see if what Hermione says is true."
"Oh?" he asked, raising a suspicious eyebrow. "And just what does she say?"
"Oh, that you're messy, late for everything, clumsy, behind the times, and didn't even know Neville and I were dating."
"Hey, in my defense, my subscription to the Daily Prophet ran out months ago."
"It's not that, Harry. The word is around the bookstore that the Boy-Who-Lived is quite taken with a certain Potion's Master," she replied, winking. He quickly turned several shades of pink, suddenly understanding what it must have felt to be in Draco's shoes not an hour ago.
"Now, shall we plan the wedding of the century or what?" she asked, smiling once more as Hermione walked in.
"B-but-''
"Did I mention Severus was coming to the wedding? Or at least we invited him. I expect Albus is going to have to drag him kicking and screaming to the ceremony; there might be no hope for the reception."
"Really, there's no need to talk abou-''
"What about Severus?" Sirius suddenly asked, having already greeted Hermione, tuned out from the conversation until just a few moments ago.
"You haven't heard?" she asked, surprised he wasn't "in the know" with the rest of the circle.
"Hermione!" Harry hissed, his life flashing before his eyes. When Sirius found out that he'd- well, natural disasters would be the least of his worries.
"Sweetie, whatever it is, I don't think Harry came to have his personal life tossed about," intervened Remus, hoping to save Harry's dignity in any possible way they could manage. Sirius was beginning to look suspicious.
"He's the bloody Boy Who Lived, Remy, everyone knows about his personal life. Now what about Snape?"
"Then there's really no problem, is there? If everyone knows, obviously you do as well," said Oliver, noting the look of horror on Harry's face and trying to help the best he could.
"I heard he went on a date with Severus," said Neville, looking thoughtful. "Hermione said-''
"I didn't say anything of the sort!" she cried, a look of shame falling upon her features, partly because it was now a fact that she, Hermione Weasley, engaged in gossip and partly because Harry was going to murder her later.
"I most certainly did not go on a date with him!"
And all the room fell quiet.
Sirius stared at Harry.
Harry stared back.
One second passed.
Two.
Then, "A DATE?!"
...
"I never went on a date with him, Sirius."
"But you'd like to, right?"
Harry was silent, staring out across the lush green grounds on which the church rested. He and Sirius were sitting on the stone steps of the church, having left the craziness for just a while, eager to have a proper conversation with one another but both unsure as to what to say.
"Your silence speaks louder than your words. You'd like to date him."
"Is that so bad?"
"What- that he's a guy? Or that he's Severus Snape?"
"Both, I suppose. I don't know. What do you think?"
"You expect me to bash you when I'm married to Remus? Besides, I'm your Godfather- I won't like anyone you decide to date."
Harry laughed softly. "That's what I hear. Overprotective much?"
A silence hung above them once again, pressing on their minds, the small conversation not enough to break the ice.
"Well, go on then. Say whatever you need to get off you chest," said Harry, finally, his voice cracking the air between them. "You brought me out here for a reason and I can tell you're about to explode. I just want to say one thing, though, before you do."
Sirius turned to face his Godson. "I'm listening."
Harry found it hard to look at him- he fought the urge to stare up at the sky where God was watching them, or the pond where things were swimming about, oblivious to the dramas humans put themselves through. It would be easier to just forget about it, to take the easier road, but Harry felt that Severus was worth anything he was going to have to go through to be with him. He took a breath before turning to face Sirius, braving the wrath his Godfather might pull down from the skies.
"Good. I'm glad you're listening. Because I really, really like Severus. He's different from what you think- he's funny, sweet; Cedric adores him. He's brilliant to me," Harry said, unconsciously grinning at the thought of even getting to see him again. "He's got morals, philosophies, personality. I didn't mean to like him so much-''
"Don't you mean love?"
Harry stared back, his green eyes wide at his Godfather's bold interruption.
Sirius grinned in return. "You love him, don't you?"
A careful pause hung between then before Harry asked, "If I did? What would you do then?"
"Harry, listen to me. I love you. I'm your Godfather, I'd love you no matter what. It's unconditional and you don't have to explain yourself to me."
Harry was stunned into speechlessness at this confession. "Oh," was all he was able to utter. "I... thought you hated him. I'd thought you'd kill him before you'd let him near me, possibly visa versa."
Sirius's smile faded a little. "It was my fault, Harry. James and I always started the fight and whatever grudge Severus and I have or had... the blame lies purely with us. We never meant to hurt him, we were silly and foolish and stupid, I'm afraid. He would've been a great friend to us, he was different from all the other Slytherins."
"How's that?"
"Harry, that man fought a war that took up half his life, he protected the most innocent children and sacrificed everything he had. It was our loss that we never knew him, but it shouldn't be yours. I don't mind you dating him, honestly. I just don't want to see you get hurt. With anyone."
Harry stared, completely fazed.
"You mean it?" he asked, feeling it was too good to be true. "Are you sure?"
Sirius smiled. "Whatever makes you happy, Harry, is perfectly acceptable to me."
A silence, a different type of quietness flowed between them, one that was happy, mellow, and comfortable. Gone was the uneasiness, the nervousness that both Harry and Sirius had been experiencing. And then Harry lurched forward, hugging his Godfather as tightly as possible, silently thanking whatever deity currently listening in for the blessing that was Sirius Black.
"Thank you," the younger wizard whispered, his face buried in the crook of Sirius's shoulder.
"Anything for you," was all Sirius said in reply.
Harry looked at him, now smiling, a Lumos spell having hit his eyes, looking as if he could walk on air. "What you go say we plan a wedding? Ginny's about to detonate, I think."
"Great idea. Go on in, I'll be right there. Just make sure the excitement doesn't get the best of her."
Harry smiled brightly, quickly standing and running in, seemingly doing a small dance. "You bet. Come on with us in a couple of minutes, okay?"
"Got it."
Harry entered the church once more, leaving Sirius to his own train of thought. The older wizard felt sick to his stomach when he realized Harry had been afraid to tell him about his attraction to Severus. It felt bad to have found out with everyone else, even worse was the fact Harry thought he couldn't share his feelings with his Godfather.
He sighed and closed his eyes.
Was he that bad of a Godfather?
Would James have been proud about how he handled it? Disappointed that he gave Harry his blessing? Would Lily agreed or disagreed? What would-
Sirius opened his eyes when he felt the presence of another sit beside him, bundled up in a heavy tan jacked, white puffs of air coming from their mouth.
"You handled it brilliantly. Don't doubt that Lily and James wouldn't have done the same, not if they truly loved their son, which, of course, they did."
Sirius turned to Remus, his black leather jacket a contrast to the softer man. "How do you always know what I'm thinking?"
"Women's intuition, silly. What else?" he joked, smiling at his husband. "Besides, I know exactly what goes through your mind when things like this happen. It goes through mine as well. I want to make sure we're the best parents we can be to Harry, but it's inevitable that we'll probably make mistakes."
"Do you think I made a mistake?"
"You've let go of whatever bothered you so much about Severus. You love Harry no matter what. That's never a mistake, sweetheart."
Remus leaned in, resting his head on Sirius's shoulder. Sirius wrapped his arm around Remus's small waist, both completely at ease and in love with one another.
True love, they knew, could never be a fault.
...
"So, how was Ginny's wedding rehearsal?" asked Ron as he, Harry, Hermione, and Cedric sat around a table, each eating an ice-cream float, cone, or sundae of their choice at Madams.
"It went fine," replied Harry, eating his chocolate sauce first. "Neville was calm, but I think his crowd-phobia will probably get to him on the big day. You might have to make sure he doesn't faint from fright."
"Or drown in his own sweat."
"Or fall unconscious."
Hermione shook her head, an entire list of things that could go wrong at Ginny's wedding building up in her mind. "I'm afraid he's right. We'll need an entire task force just to make sure he can make it without losing the contents of his stomach."
"I guess I could keep an eye on him and make sure everything goes all right," offered Ron, looking thoughtfully at Hermione. "I remember the day I married you-''
"Your ears were red for a week afterwards," finished Harry, remembering the wedding well and hoping he'd never have to go through anything like it again.
"I'm sure it'll be fine," reassured Cedric, taking a sip of his milkshake. "Everyone will be there, and Mister Longbottom knows them all from school, right?"
"The man has a point," agreed Ron. "How nervous can you be in front of old classmates and ghosts?"
"Don't forget teachers. I'm sure the Headmaster is dragging them all along with him."
"Except Snape. I bet he'll just-'' began Ron, silenced only by the sharp kick to his shin delivered by his wife. He winced in pain before looking sheepishly at Harry. "I bet I'll just shut-up know, won't I?"
Hermione gave him an evil look. "If you wouldn't mind."
Harry felt a wave of nausea crash down on him, the thought of seeing Severus again making him both dizzy with anticipation and sick with nervousness. He missed Severus already- more than words could possibly describe. He was too ashamed to apologize, held back by all the worst case scenarios he unintentionally dreamt up in his mind, plus he felt just plain stupid for letting him go, holding himself back with memories of his previous marriage.
Hermione looked at him carefully before hesitantly asking, "Do you suppose he'll attend?"
Ron made a contemplative face. "I haven't the slightest clue. You can never tell with him. Five galleons he doesn't."
Hermione raised a brow. "Ten he does."
"You're on!"
...
"Hello Severus," greeted Albus, smiling at the dark wizard who was currently taking a liking to stabbing his steak until it was practically puréed. It was dinnertime in the Great Hall and it was a public fact that Severus hated dinnertime in that room, although the hall itself wasn't the problem. He loathed anything that required his presence with the rest of the Hogwarts population, especially if it was in a confined space.
And he considered the Great Hall to be a confined space.
"Good evening, Albus," replied Severus, wishing he could just skip the mealtime nightmare. He had a dreadful feeling in the pit of his stomach when he looked up and saw the Headmaster's blue eyes twinkle and shine innocently, a dead giveaway that a scheme was formulating in the older man's mind.
"How have you been these past few days?" the Headmaster asked, calmly taking a seat next to him. Ah. Chit-chat conversation, questioning his state of mind, testing the waters. Severus knew this scenario all too well.
"Peachy, thank you. And yourself?"
"Oh, I'm doing as well as my age permits, I suppose. Although..." Great. The "although" break-off of a sentence was always a bad sign.
"I just received Ginny Weasley's wedding invitation, as did the rest of the staff. I was curious as to whether you've obtained yours."
Weddings. Severus hated weddings as well. Funerals were acceptable- someone died, you'll never see them again and honoring their departure from the Earth seemed reasonable. Not weddings. Anything but a wedding.
"I'm sure its ashes are somewhere in the trash can."
"You're not quite eager to attend?" The innocent question.
"I've got dungeons to clean, papers to grade, and paint to watch peel. No. I'm not interested." A clear-cut response.
"Oh, Severus. That's quite a shame. Her groom-to-be is Neville Longbottom." A coaxing invitation- the textbook Albus Dumbledore Get Severus To Do Whatever I Want Plan (now on sale at your local bookstore) was obviously in action. Severus knew he had to somehow deflect that glitter and glow of the Headmaster's I'm-So-Innocent eyes.
"Then I especially have no inclination to attend."
"You don't want to witness your former students join together in a joyful union?"
"No."
"All of your other former students will be there as well."
"Veto."
"Your old friends will be wall to wall, happy to see you."
"I'd rather die."
"There's free food."
"Oh, please, don't tempt me."
Albus sighed, a forlorn tint to his voice. "Then I suppose I'll go alone then."
"The entire staff is going. How could you possibly go alone?"
"It won't quite be the same without you."
"My heart bleeds. What's your point?"
Albus sighed once more before rising from his seat, purposely clutching his cane he'd started walking around with a few days ago.
"I'll see you later then, my friend. Good luck with your cleaning, grading, and paint peeling."
Severus paused a moment. Somehow he'd avoided Albus Dumbledore's patented trap, but how?
"I live here, Albus. Of course you'll see me," said Severus, albeit rather carefully.
"And that is always an uplifting thought, Severus. There are so many I'll never get to see again. Not after the war..."
Severus closed his eyes and clenched his jaw. He'd learned (after knowing the Headmaster for an ungodly number of years) that there was always "the moment" in a conversation with Albus when you either finally accepted whatever his crazy plan might be, or leave Albus hobbling away, a cloud of disappointment hanging above him. It took Severus a long time to identify when that certain moment made its appearance and now he was here, aware he could either let the war haunt the Headmaster or go with him to the stupid wedding.
But he knew he'd see Harry there and he wasn't sure if he could handle it.
It would hurt.
Surely Albus knew that?
He would remember how happy he was in that short amount of time they were close and it would rip at him, mock him, old voices of old acquaintances taunting him and whispering, I told you so. You will never be happy, because you don't deserve that sort of life.
With a sigh, the beautiful wizard stood up from where he was, completely sick to his stomach but determined to brave life nonetheless, aware that he'd eventually see Harry at one point or another in the future. Why wait?
"Albus."
It was a demand for attention and the Headmaster stopped his walking and turned to face his Potions Master.
"Yes, Severus?"
"Of course I'll go."
Albus Dumbledore smiled at him and Severus felt grateful that he could at least make someone else happy.
Because God knows that he was not.
A/T: I can't believe I'm writing about Ginny. I was usually too busy despising her and Cho until I read the fifth book. I think Ms. Rowling did a good job of giving her personality instead of making her the "little-sister-that-has-a-crush-on-brother's-best-friend" role. However, Cho is still as sneaky, deceiving, and evil as usual. Doesn't she know there's only one person for Harry? Duh.