Chapter 7: The One Who Wasn't
A/N: I think this chapter is amusing. You all may not, but you can go eat hounded pineapples then! ;)
Disclaimer: As always, I do NOT own Legolas or anything to directly do with LOTR or JRR Tolkien. I also do not own Orlando Bloom. discontent sigh
Eruialiwen was the first to realize that the descent was vastly slowing down. Calenhen still flailed beneath her, but she kept a firm grip on the reins and with her knees, determined to hold on as the terror ebbed away. Now it was more like they were drifting down, instead of falling. The pitch blackness around them was lightening steadily, like a fast-approaching dawn, and the air had stopped whistling. Calenhen drew her hoofs in as though preparing to land, and Eruialiwen noticed that she could see her friends again, and their steeds were doing the same. Her friends were white-faced, but seemed to have lost their fright and were beginning to look at each other. None of them had any time to think any more as their horses' hoofs suddenly and gently touched ground at a gallop. The elves quickly reined them in, and as they did so, the darkness all around them began to lift like diluting ink. A faint noise like rushing water grew somewhere in the distance, becoming louder and louder every moment until the horses began balking nervously and their riders withdrew their weapons in anticipation of what might be coming. Eruialiwen had just nocked an arrow when suddenly the noises came to a pitch--women shouting and screaming--and the dark ground pitched downwards, throwing all five elves from their horses and casting their weapons out of reach in the process. Strong, flashing lights attacked Eruialiwen's eyes as she quickly leaped up, but they weren't strong enough to keep her from staring around her. On either side of her were thin, metal fences, holding back what appeared to be hundreds of young women that were leaning and groping the air and cheering at the tops of their lungs. In dozens of places among the women were the frequent bright flashes of light, and most of the hysterical women were showing more skin than the prostitutes Eruialiwen once saw in a distant town of the Edain. These were definitely Edain as well, as well as the men scattered at intervals along the outside of the fences; these men wore all black and were burly, handsome creatures that seemed to be guarding the women. Or guarding something from them. "What is going on?" Talawen's eyes were huge, her short sword held before her. "Where are we? What madness is this?"
"At least we are alive," Lothatal replied. "But I too would like to know where in Middle-Earth we are. I do not know this place."
Enednilwen's hand was back on Tirindail's beloved handle. "I do not think we are in Middle-Earth anymore, Lothatal," she said quietly; for even above the din the elves could still hear a whisper a mile away with their sharp hearing. "What ails them?" Ainacalion said aloud, body taut, gazing from one side of the stricken women to the other. "You should say 'who' ails them," Lothatal growled, then blinked sharply at the opposite end of the hard path they were standing on. "Am I joining their madness, or do I see the one we seek?"
Eruialiwen instantly followed her gaze, and when her eyes made contact with the person Lothatal was motioning to, her mind went white and seemed to tighten in toward her eyes, and her blood thundered red at the edges of her vision for a moment with an excited thrill. It was Legolas, or so it seemed. Did the vestiges of time and place that he fell through distort his mind, or was he forced into shearing off his gorgeous hair and dyeing it dark brown, like her own hair? He did not wear the earthen colors she had seen him in before, but instead wore clothes more bizarre and bright than most of the womens' clothing, or lack thereof. At least he was fully clothed, Eruialiwen thought, and then a bright stab of strange feeling hit her as he hugged many of the screaming women and even kissed some of them on the cheek. As the elves stood wide-eyed and staring at Legolas, Ainacalion voiced what all of them were thinking. "He certainly has changed, hasn't he?"
Suddenly, several of the black-dressed guards were pushing the elves toward the metal fences and writhing women. "Get back in there," one of them was shouting. "I know you guys like Orlando a lot, but so do the rest of these people. Now get back!" He roughly grabbed Eruialiwen's arm as she broke away from the group and started running toward Legolas. "Damn these fangirls to hell and back!" the guard barked, yanking her backward as she pulled against him.
"Get off her!" Ainacalion shouted, raising his sword threateningly at the guards.
Eruialiwen broke away again and ran toward Legolas. He was busy writing on a piece of paper an adolescant girl had handed him, and didn't see the elleth until she was nearly atop him. "Legolas," she breathed. "You are safe."
He turned to her with a raised eyebrow and an expression resembling fear and amusement. And his eyes are brown, Eruialiwen noted to herself in surprise. How have his eyes changed from blue to brown?
"Legolas isn't here," he said with a grin and an accent unfamiliar to her. "He was abducted by sex-crazed aliens just a half hour ago. Sorry you missed him."
Several of the women before him giggled loudly at his words. He finished writing on the paper and handed it back to the young girl, who was blushing furiously and tittered a nervous thanks as his hand brushed against hers. "Nice costume," he said, still looking at the dumbfounded Eruialiwen. "It's really authentic-looking, you know. You seem to have devoted a lot of time to this." He grabbed her in such a sudden hug that her breath was taken away in a shaky sigh. "Most actors hate their fans, but I don't," he continued with a laugh. "I feel special."
A hooked hand in Eruialiwen's shoulder sharply jerked her away from him. Her hands were forced behind her back and she felt something cold and heavy and tight being cinched around her wrists. She twisted her head around and came face to face with yet another guard, but this one was dressed in blue and looked very angry. "Oh, come off it," Legolas--or who was supposed to be Legolas--protested. "Give the girl a break. She isn't hurting anybody."
"Sorry Mr. Bloom," the guard said, "but she is carrying a weapon. Her little friends back there threatened to kill the cops that were trying to get them back behind the barrier, and have also got a crapload of weapons on them." Shrugging, he whipped Eruialiwen around and forced her back toward her comrades. Disoriented and bewildered beyond capacity, she numbly allowed herself to be seized and dragged away like a criminal, separated from Legolas yet again.
A/N: I think this chapter is amusing. You all may not, but you can go eat hounded pineapples then! ;)
Disclaimer: As always, I do NOT own Legolas or anything to directly do with LOTR or JRR Tolkien. I also do not own Orlando Bloom. discontent sigh
Eruialiwen was the first to realize that the descent was vastly slowing down. Calenhen still flailed beneath her, but she kept a firm grip on the reins and with her knees, determined to hold on as the terror ebbed away. Now it was more like they were drifting down, instead of falling. The pitch blackness around them was lightening steadily, like a fast-approaching dawn, and the air had stopped whistling. Calenhen drew her hoofs in as though preparing to land, and Eruialiwen noticed that she could see her friends again, and their steeds were doing the same. Her friends were white-faced, but seemed to have lost their fright and were beginning to look at each other. None of them had any time to think any more as their horses' hoofs suddenly and gently touched ground at a gallop. The elves quickly reined them in, and as they did so, the darkness all around them began to lift like diluting ink. A faint noise like rushing water grew somewhere in the distance, becoming louder and louder every moment until the horses began balking nervously and their riders withdrew their weapons in anticipation of what might be coming. Eruialiwen had just nocked an arrow when suddenly the noises came to a pitch--women shouting and screaming--and the dark ground pitched downwards, throwing all five elves from their horses and casting their weapons out of reach in the process. Strong, flashing lights attacked Eruialiwen's eyes as she quickly leaped up, but they weren't strong enough to keep her from staring around her. On either side of her were thin, metal fences, holding back what appeared to be hundreds of young women that were leaning and groping the air and cheering at the tops of their lungs. In dozens of places among the women were the frequent bright flashes of light, and most of the hysterical women were showing more skin than the prostitutes Eruialiwen once saw in a distant town of the Edain. These were definitely Edain as well, as well as the men scattered at intervals along the outside of the fences; these men wore all black and were burly, handsome creatures that seemed to be guarding the women. Or guarding something from them. "What is going on?" Talawen's eyes were huge, her short sword held before her. "Where are we? What madness is this?"
"At least we are alive," Lothatal replied. "But I too would like to know where in Middle-Earth we are. I do not know this place."
Enednilwen's hand was back on Tirindail's beloved handle. "I do not think we are in Middle-Earth anymore, Lothatal," she said quietly; for even above the din the elves could still hear a whisper a mile away with their sharp hearing. "What ails them?" Ainacalion said aloud, body taut, gazing from one side of the stricken women to the other. "You should say 'who' ails them," Lothatal growled, then blinked sharply at the opposite end of the hard path they were standing on. "Am I joining their madness, or do I see the one we seek?"
Eruialiwen instantly followed her gaze, and when her eyes made contact with the person Lothatal was motioning to, her mind went white and seemed to tighten in toward her eyes, and her blood thundered red at the edges of her vision for a moment with an excited thrill. It was Legolas, or so it seemed. Did the vestiges of time and place that he fell through distort his mind, or was he forced into shearing off his gorgeous hair and dyeing it dark brown, like her own hair? He did not wear the earthen colors she had seen him in before, but instead wore clothes more bizarre and bright than most of the womens' clothing, or lack thereof. At least he was fully clothed, Eruialiwen thought, and then a bright stab of strange feeling hit her as he hugged many of the screaming women and even kissed some of them on the cheek. As the elves stood wide-eyed and staring at Legolas, Ainacalion voiced what all of them were thinking. "He certainly has changed, hasn't he?"
Suddenly, several of the black-dressed guards were pushing the elves toward the metal fences and writhing women. "Get back in there," one of them was shouting. "I know you guys like Orlando a lot, but so do the rest of these people. Now get back!" He roughly grabbed Eruialiwen's arm as she broke away from the group and started running toward Legolas. "Damn these fangirls to hell and back!" the guard barked, yanking her backward as she pulled against him.
"Get off her!" Ainacalion shouted, raising his sword threateningly at the guards.
Eruialiwen broke away again and ran toward Legolas. He was busy writing on a piece of paper an adolescant girl had handed him, and didn't see the elleth until she was nearly atop him. "Legolas," she breathed. "You are safe."
He turned to her with a raised eyebrow and an expression resembling fear and amusement. And his eyes are brown, Eruialiwen noted to herself in surprise. How have his eyes changed from blue to brown?
"Legolas isn't here," he said with a grin and an accent unfamiliar to her. "He was abducted by sex-crazed aliens just a half hour ago. Sorry you missed him."
Several of the women before him giggled loudly at his words. He finished writing on the paper and handed it back to the young girl, who was blushing furiously and tittered a nervous thanks as his hand brushed against hers. "Nice costume," he said, still looking at the dumbfounded Eruialiwen. "It's really authentic-looking, you know. You seem to have devoted a lot of time to this." He grabbed her in such a sudden hug that her breath was taken away in a shaky sigh. "Most actors hate their fans, but I don't," he continued with a laugh. "I feel special."
A hooked hand in Eruialiwen's shoulder sharply jerked her away from him. Her hands were forced behind her back and she felt something cold and heavy and tight being cinched around her wrists. She twisted her head around and came face to face with yet another guard, but this one was dressed in blue and looked very angry. "Oh, come off it," Legolas--or who was supposed to be Legolas--protested. "Give the girl a break. She isn't hurting anybody."
"Sorry Mr. Bloom," the guard said, "but she is carrying a weapon. Her little friends back there threatened to kill the cops that were trying to get them back behind the barrier, and have also got a crapload of weapons on them." Shrugging, he whipped Eruialiwen around and forced her back toward her comrades. Disoriented and bewildered beyond capacity, she numbly allowed herself to be seized and dragged away like a criminal, separated from Legolas yet again.