The school bell rang and all the kids ran into class. There were four
students, however, that did not. Spyro and Hunter were in the middle of an
arm-wrestling contest and Elora and Bianca were sheering them on.
"Come on Hunter! You can win!" yelled Bianca.
"Go Spyro! Yay!" hollered Elora. The counselor and the janitor eventually dragged them into class. The teacher, Ms. Jones, was busy calling roll when they arrived. "Late again, I see." She sighed as she put tardy marks next to their names. "You four, please go to room 305. Starting today, you'll be taking a different class to help you pass this year." They shrugged and went to room 305.
Mrs. Blake was there waiting for them. Spyro sat down in the desk by the window. Hunter sat beside him, and beside him sat Bianca. Elora chose the seat next to Bianca. "Now, you are in here for one reason. Can you tell me why?" she asked. Spyro raised his hand. "Um, no?" Mrs. Blake sighed. "You are in here because you really need to pass this year."
"Why?" asked Elora.
"Because you're twenty-five years old and still in the third grade!"
"Oh."
"Now, let's get started. First we'll go over the basics." She picked up a piece of chalk and drew a triangle on the board. "Take out a piece of paper and a pencil and draw a triangle." She instructed. A few moments passed and then Hunter held up his paper. "Like this?"
"No, Hunter, that's the Roman numeral three."
"Like this?" asked Bianca.
"No, Bianca, that's a square."
"Like this?"
"No, Elora, that's a pentagon."
"What about this?"
"Spyro! That's a nonagon!"
Mrs. Blake erased the triangle from the board. "Let's try something else. Who can tell me what happened on July fourth, 1776?"
Elora raised her hand. "The sun rose?" Mrs. Blake rolled her eyes. "Yes, I suppose it did, but that's not the answer I'm looking for. Hunter, can you tell me?"
"The sun set?"
"Yes, that too, but again that's not the answer I'm looking for." Spyro looked around. "Out of curiosity, where IS the answer you're looking for?" Hunter got up to help Spyro look for the answer. "Get back in your seats!" snapped Mrs. Blake. They scurried back to their seats. "Now, apparently we'll have to work on history." She drew a large circle on the board and divided it into fourths. "Bianca, if you have a pie like this and cut it in fourths like this, and then give a piece to Hunter, how much pie do you have left?"
"What kind of pie is it?"
"It doesn't matter."
"But what if Hunter likes one kind of pie better than another?"
"Okay! It's cherry pie!"
"Then Hunter can have all of it. I hate cherry pie."
Mrs. Blake hurriedly erased the circle. "Oh for Pete's sake! No Wonder Ms. Jones failed you fifteen times!" she shouted. "Actually it was sixteen times." Remarked Hunter.
"I've got my work cut out for me." muttered Mrs. Blake. She pulled out the overhead projector and turned off the lights.
"AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M BLIND!!!!!" screamed Hunter. "Hunter, chill! She just turned the lights off!" whispered Spyro. "Now get out from under your desk!" Hunter got back in his seat while Mrs. Blake explained what they were about to do. "I am going to show you a slide show of important events in history. You will take notes that I will be reading over to see how well you were paying attention. There will be a test immediately following this show."
She turned on the slide projector. "Spyro! Put the popcorn away!"
"Yes ma'am." Spyro said as he reluctantly put his popcorn back in his desk. The slide show was rather long, and Mrs. Blake watched as the foursome wrote notes like crazy. "Well!" she thought. "This might be the year they actually pass third grade!" When the slide show was over, she collected their notes and handed them the test. She read the notes, starting with Spyro's.
He had drawn a comic book titled 'The Adventures of Bob the Strawberry.' Hunter's notes were actually a road map to Denver. Bianca had written a five page long essay on why floppy disks weren't really very floppy. And last but not least, Elora had drawn blueprints for a multi-purpose dog collar/life support system/deep fryer. Mrs. Blake gave a disgusted sigh and went to collect their tests. She was surprised to see that no one had a test paper on their desk!
"Elora, where is your test?"
Elora pointed to the air vent on the floor. "It's in there." Mrs. Blake walked down the row to Spyro.
"Spyro, what did you do with your test?" she asked. Spyro shrugged. "I mailed it to Japan." Mrs. Blake was starting to get a headache. "Bianca, what about you?"
"I gave my test to Hunter."
"Hunter! Where is yours and Bianca's tests?" she demanded.
"I ate it." Mrs. Blake stared for a moment. "You ate your test? AND Bianca's?"
"That's right. On rye bread."
"Where did you get rye bread?"
"I brought it with me."
"Why did you eat two tests?"
"Because it had peanut butter on it."
Mrs. Blake went back to her desk, took two antacids, and turned to Hunter again. "Why was their peanut butter on your test?" Hunter rolled his eyes and explained it to her as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Because my pen ran out of ink so I substituted the peanut butter for the ink."
"But what about Bianca's test? It was written in ink!"
"I know, so I put some jelly on it to cover up the inky taste."
Mrs. Blake closed her eyes and counted to ten. "Ok, Elora, See if you can get you test out of the air vent. Spyro, I want you to call Federal Express and see if they'll return you test before it get to Japan. Bianca and Hunter, you come with me to the nurses office. We need her to extract your tests from Hunter's stomach.
(Coming up next- the math lesson! Will Mrs. Blake be able to prove that one plus one is two? Stay tuned and find out!)
"Come on Hunter! You can win!" yelled Bianca.
"Go Spyro! Yay!" hollered Elora. The counselor and the janitor eventually dragged them into class. The teacher, Ms. Jones, was busy calling roll when they arrived. "Late again, I see." She sighed as she put tardy marks next to their names. "You four, please go to room 305. Starting today, you'll be taking a different class to help you pass this year." They shrugged and went to room 305.
Mrs. Blake was there waiting for them. Spyro sat down in the desk by the window. Hunter sat beside him, and beside him sat Bianca. Elora chose the seat next to Bianca. "Now, you are in here for one reason. Can you tell me why?" she asked. Spyro raised his hand. "Um, no?" Mrs. Blake sighed. "You are in here because you really need to pass this year."
"Why?" asked Elora.
"Because you're twenty-five years old and still in the third grade!"
"Oh."
"Now, let's get started. First we'll go over the basics." She picked up a piece of chalk and drew a triangle on the board. "Take out a piece of paper and a pencil and draw a triangle." She instructed. A few moments passed and then Hunter held up his paper. "Like this?"
"No, Hunter, that's the Roman numeral three."
"Like this?" asked Bianca.
"No, Bianca, that's a square."
"Like this?"
"No, Elora, that's a pentagon."
"What about this?"
"Spyro! That's a nonagon!"
Mrs. Blake erased the triangle from the board. "Let's try something else. Who can tell me what happened on July fourth, 1776?"
Elora raised her hand. "The sun rose?" Mrs. Blake rolled her eyes. "Yes, I suppose it did, but that's not the answer I'm looking for. Hunter, can you tell me?"
"The sun set?"
"Yes, that too, but again that's not the answer I'm looking for." Spyro looked around. "Out of curiosity, where IS the answer you're looking for?" Hunter got up to help Spyro look for the answer. "Get back in your seats!" snapped Mrs. Blake. They scurried back to their seats. "Now, apparently we'll have to work on history." She drew a large circle on the board and divided it into fourths. "Bianca, if you have a pie like this and cut it in fourths like this, and then give a piece to Hunter, how much pie do you have left?"
"What kind of pie is it?"
"It doesn't matter."
"But what if Hunter likes one kind of pie better than another?"
"Okay! It's cherry pie!"
"Then Hunter can have all of it. I hate cherry pie."
Mrs. Blake hurriedly erased the circle. "Oh for Pete's sake! No Wonder Ms. Jones failed you fifteen times!" she shouted. "Actually it was sixteen times." Remarked Hunter.
"I've got my work cut out for me." muttered Mrs. Blake. She pulled out the overhead projector and turned off the lights.
"AAAAAAAAAAAA!!!!!!!!!!!! I'M BLIND!!!!!" screamed Hunter. "Hunter, chill! She just turned the lights off!" whispered Spyro. "Now get out from under your desk!" Hunter got back in his seat while Mrs. Blake explained what they were about to do. "I am going to show you a slide show of important events in history. You will take notes that I will be reading over to see how well you were paying attention. There will be a test immediately following this show."
She turned on the slide projector. "Spyro! Put the popcorn away!"
"Yes ma'am." Spyro said as he reluctantly put his popcorn back in his desk. The slide show was rather long, and Mrs. Blake watched as the foursome wrote notes like crazy. "Well!" she thought. "This might be the year they actually pass third grade!" When the slide show was over, she collected their notes and handed them the test. She read the notes, starting with Spyro's.
He had drawn a comic book titled 'The Adventures of Bob the Strawberry.' Hunter's notes were actually a road map to Denver. Bianca had written a five page long essay on why floppy disks weren't really very floppy. And last but not least, Elora had drawn blueprints for a multi-purpose dog collar/life support system/deep fryer. Mrs. Blake gave a disgusted sigh and went to collect their tests. She was surprised to see that no one had a test paper on their desk!
"Elora, where is your test?"
Elora pointed to the air vent on the floor. "It's in there." Mrs. Blake walked down the row to Spyro.
"Spyro, what did you do with your test?" she asked. Spyro shrugged. "I mailed it to Japan." Mrs. Blake was starting to get a headache. "Bianca, what about you?"
"I gave my test to Hunter."
"Hunter! Where is yours and Bianca's tests?" she demanded.
"I ate it." Mrs. Blake stared for a moment. "You ate your test? AND Bianca's?"
"That's right. On rye bread."
"Where did you get rye bread?"
"I brought it with me."
"Why did you eat two tests?"
"Because it had peanut butter on it."
Mrs. Blake went back to her desk, took two antacids, and turned to Hunter again. "Why was their peanut butter on your test?" Hunter rolled his eyes and explained it to her as if it was the most obvious thing in the world. "Because my pen ran out of ink so I substituted the peanut butter for the ink."
"But what about Bianca's test? It was written in ink!"
"I know, so I put some jelly on it to cover up the inky taste."
Mrs. Blake closed her eyes and counted to ten. "Ok, Elora, See if you can get you test out of the air vent. Spyro, I want you to call Federal Express and see if they'll return you test before it get to Japan. Bianca and Hunter, you come with me to the nurses office. We need her to extract your tests from Hunter's stomach.
(Coming up next- the math lesson! Will Mrs. Blake be able to prove that one plus one is two? Stay tuned and find out!)