Heltzaku would barely look at Sakina anymore, not that it concerned her really. Sakina had found a niche that suited her for the time-being. Her friends made her memories fade while they were around, but every evening, Sakina would have her wounds ripped open as she wandered alone across Hyrule Field in hope of Link's return. His face burned in her memory, like the brand on her neck. Sometimes she wouldn't practice for very long at the Temple, instead choosing to think. On two occasions she had fallen asleep and awoken as a hot poker was being shoved into her neck….
Malon and she grew up together, getting to know one another, being the other's salvation. About twice a week, Mr. Ingo would go off and give Malon and Sakina time alone at the stables. It was there that Sakina learned to ride.
"You aren't a natural," Malon giggled, as Sakina fell off of her horse for the fourth time.
"Really? What gave you that impression?" Sakina laughed. The horse she was trying to mount snorted irritably at her. "Oh, don't give up, Brownie." She chided the horse. It took about five more tries for her to successfully get on top of the horse.
"Good job," Malon was smiling broadly. "Let's take a few walking laps around the course, shall we?"
"No, let's just sit here and admire the fact that I'm sitting on top of a horse for the first time." Sakina said, half-serious. Initially, she found riding the horse annoying and bouncy. Within a couple of practices, she found it to be quite soothing and natural. Malon and she would race around an obstacle course, Malon winning every time, but Sakina didn't mind.
One time, Sakina took out a few targets and asked if she could practice shooting from atop the horse. Malon was surprised by this request but complied. Once Sakina mastered the moving aspect, she had it down pat. Malon liked watching this for awhile, but eventually wanted to move onto more interesting things. They would usually ride around the stables until Mr. Ingo was due to return and Sakina would head home on foot.
"Sakina," Malon said just before Sakina went on her way home one day. "It's my thirteenth birthday tomorrow," she explained. "I'm making a cake for myself, if you'd like to come a little earlier and share it with me." Her blue eyes were wide with hope.
Sakina grinned. "Oh, I'll be there."
Upon returning to Gerudo Valley, she was chatting with Kynthia and Zahmora.
"My friend Malon is having her thirteenth birthday tomorrow. Is it okay if I come back a little later that night?" She asked.
"I don't see why not," Zahmora nodded.
"But Heltzaku might use that as an excuse to-."
"Don't be stupid, Kynthia. We'll cover for her if anyone asks." Zahmora rolled her eyes.
"Thanks." Sakina spent the rest of the night contemplating what sort of a gift she could bring to Malon the next day. During a practice rally with Naoll she decided that she could give Malon her old dagger, something to defend herself with if it ever became necessary. The one from Saria would be nicest, because it was more decorative than her own.
She didn't stay too long for free-time that day. Sabu told her that she would soon be learning how to shoot off of a horse's back. They had a gentle old roan for her to use. Sakina didn't tell her that she had already learned this new sport. Sakina headed off and practically ran into the Temple.
"It's Malon's birthday today," she explained to the wall. Touching it gently, she allowed only one tear to fall. The rest she wiped away before they could go any further. "It's our birthday in a week. At least… as far as we know. Who knows when we were really born?" Sakina sighed. "I wish you would come back." She momentarily recalled one time that Link and Sakina sat alone on top of the look-out point just off of Saria's house. They were talking about how one day they would do something really outstanding, phenomenal and story-worthy. Oh Din, why did we have to be so right?
Sakina left earlier, made sure her scratched note was still in the Temple in case Link did leave that day. Hurriedly, she got to Malon's ranch and snuck in.
"Hey!" Malon said eagerly, pulling her sneakily into the barn.
"Happy birthday," Sakina handed Malon the dagger, wrapped in a white piece of cloth. Malon opened it excitedly. "I thought maybe it'd come in handy for you one day."
"Wow, it's gorgeous." Malon smiled broadly at her friend. "Thanks so much!" They hugged again. Malon's cake was small and delicious. They sat and talked for a few hours, at least until Mr. Ingo came in to see what Malon was up to. Sakina hid in a corner, holding her breath and the gift dagger. Malon started scrubbing the floors with a red face.
"Glad to see that's what's you're doing. Heard rumors, you see." Mr. Ingo breathed.
Malon looked up curiously but didn't speak.
"You know that forest-kid? Guess she's been around. Getting older or something strange. Dressed in Gerudo garments." Mr. Ingo leaned against the wall. Malon's eyes flickered to where Sakina stood. "I just thought maybe you were foolish enough to invite her inside." He trumped over to where Malon stood and picked her up by her hair. Malon didn't make a noise. Sakina considered killing Mr. Ingo but thought that might actually be a bad thing, rather than helpful, for Malon at the time. According to Malon, Ganondorf routinely checked the stables and if Mr. Ingo were absent, Malon could find herself in a world of danger that she undoubtedly didn't need.
"You may be stupid," he said right in Malon's face, "but you're not that stupid, are you?" He caressed her cheek, reminding Sakina strongly of Ganondorf. Sakina's lip curled with fury. "Answer me, won't you? Or must you always be so blasted silent?"
"No," Malon whimpered.
"Good," he dropped her to the floor. "Finish up here. Inspections tomorrow. Mine, not the ruler's." Mr. Ingo slammed the door behind him.
Sakina counted to ten before talking to Malon again.
"I'm sorry," Sakina whispered. "Why don't you just run away?" Sakina took Malon's shoulder.
"I c-can't leave the horses. He doesn't know how to take care of them," Malon's eyes were watery. "Don't you understand?"
Sakina nodded, but wished that Malon would love herself a bit more than a few stupid horses.
On her way out, Malon warned her not to come for the rest of the week.
"Ganondorf, he'll be around for awhile. If he saw you I don't know what would happen." Malon looked at Sakina gravely. "Thank you again. That was a fun birthday."
Sakina forced a smile, still thinking about what she had just seen.
"Your birthday is tomorrow, eh? Thirteen? She's growin' right up before our very eyes." Nokomis nodded to herself. Naoll, Sabu, Nokomis, Neona and Misae had come into Sakina, Zahmora, and Kynthia's room to visit for the afternoon. Sakina was serving tea to the guests. Her stomach was hurting fiercely. She felt rather ill but was afraid to say anything. While the women were discussing other things, she excused herself to go to the toilets. A few minutes later she came out running.
She tugged worriedly on Zahmora's sleeve and whispered to her.
"I'm bleeding!"
"Come again?" Zahmora spoke aloud. Sakina thought she would die of shame. Gerudo warriors were not meant to fear.
"I am bleeding," she muttered.
Zahmora, to Sakina's shock, smiled. "Where are you bleeding?"
"From here." Sakina said awkwardly, pointing.
"She's becoming a woman!" Zahmora announced to the curious room. "Quickly, get her a Band of Innocence, won't you?"
Sabu ran out eagerly and Kynthia began giggling excitedly, squeaking about "all grown up" and "a real woman." Sakina was utterly mystified by the whole situation.
"Your monthly bleeding has begun," Zahmora said, wrapping a motherly arm around her shoulders. "You are of an age when childbearing is possible."
"Why do I have to bleed to have children?" Sakina asked, clutching her belly uncomfortably.
"Oh, Sakina, it is a gift of Nayru for a woman to have children."
"That doesn't explain the bleeding," Sakina said, more curiously than crossly.
Zahmora, grinning broadly, went on to explain the facts of life. Occasionally Nokomis would have her words, which more often than not, frightened Sakina, and when Nokomis would speak, Kynthia would quickly chastise her.
"She doesn't need to hear all that! You may do such things, but not all of us do."
"Oh please, Kynthia. I'm just trying to lighten things up a bit. Besides, she should be informed, the poor ignorant kid." Nokomis shook her head. "You know, Nabooru was always the best at explaining this stuff."
"I have the Band!" Sabu burst back into the room, bearing braided twine with an intricate knot tied in the middle. She bent down and unlaced Sakina's boot.
"What are you doing?" Sakina was confused.
"Assuring that you only get pregnant when you're ready to, kid." Sabu smiled at her, a naughty look appearing in her yellow eyes.
"In other words, you take this off when you're ready to get pregnant." Kynthia explained more smoothly. "Only when you find a man that will make desired children."
Sakina was becoming more and more unsure about this whole childbearing thing.
"Or when you are in a position to have kids, like you feel you're ready and whatnot." Nokomis elucidated for the bewildered Sakina.
Sabu securely tied the knot around her ankle.
"There you are, love." Sabu smiled at her and handed Sakina her shoe back. "No more bleeding for you. Until you take that off, at any rate."
Sakina had to admit that her stomach felt suddenly relieved and the swelling feeling that she had been suffering had gone away. It was as if it had never occurred.
That evening she again had to bring to the table meals for her new growth.
"Mm, that girl looks more Hylian by the day. 'Tis a pity she must be so fair-skinned. Can't very well pretend she's one of us." Nokomis leaned forward on the table. "Especially not with those green eyes and dark hair. She could almost pass for a forest-kid, but then there's the fact that she's tall and developing."
"The way you eye her sometimes I'd think you were her mother." Naoll chided. "And soon you'll be undergoing empty-nest syndrome. Hers will last quite a bit longer than most…."
"Hey," Nokomis started defensively. "I know she's gonna hafta leave us in three years, but can't I enjoy her company while it's here?"
Zahmora ran into the mess hall and took a feisty seat next to Kynthia.
"Did you see?" She gasped.
"Where have you been?" Kynthia said at the same time.
"Heltzaku's gotta man in her room now! I guess it's time to start having kids again!"
"What? How did you see…?" Nokomis grinned. "Were you just passing by or did you follow her?"
"She was arriving with a guy from Kakariko," Zahmora explained. "So I followed, yeah."
"She'll be announcing it tomorrow, don't you think?" Nokomis pushed.
"Probably, if she keeps up with them duties she always goes on about." Zahmora nodded.
"Great," Nokomis rubbed her hands together. Sakina arrived with their platters of food. "Oh, Sakina dear," she started, "do you think you're gonna be long at the Temple tonight?"
"Maybe, I don't know yet." Sakina admitted, taking a seat. "Why?"
"Eh… I just thought it might be good for you to know that soon… the schedules are gonna be a bit… different."
"Does this have to do with me?" Sakina asked bluntly.
"For once, no." Nokomis laughed. "Look, either tonight or tomorrow, Heltzaku's gonna tell us it's time for us to start bringing men home again."
"What that means is, because you're the youngest, you're going to be getting your own room for awhile so there's more room for the men." Kynthia said quickly before Nokomis could turn it into something dirty.
"In essence," Naoll broke in, "we just wanted you to understand what was going on when you got back if there was a sudden uprising of Gerudos on horses. They're just going to Kakariko to find men."
"I don't have to find a man, do I?" Sakina was terrified and suddenly stopped eating for the nauseous feeling in the pit of her stomach.
"Good Farore, no!" Kynthia shook her head vehemently. "Only once you're a real woman. When you're sixteen…."
"That's three years yet, kid. No worries." Nokomis ruffled her hair fondly.
When she wandered out to the Temple that night, she had a lot more on her mind than usual. Trying not to think about Nayru's Gift, she scrambled to the inside of the Temple of Time. She wasn't expecting the wall to be down and wasn't taken aback. It was still there. Thinking of her own growth, she wondered whether or not Link would have grown. Maybe the Temple kept him from aging. Sakina thought about this.
"So you still come here, do you?"
Sakina whipped around and was shocked to see the owl perched inside the building.
"Well… clearly." Her memories came back to her of the last time she had seen him. She swallowed hard as she remembered the pain and fright of the moment. Her heart was so aching for the loss of her greatest companion. The loneliness that she usually had for him while being at the Temple had seemed to fade as the years marched on. "What are you doing here?"
"Me? Hoot. Hoot. Just watching the wall the same as you." The owl explained, fluttering over to stand next to her. Sakina took a seat next to him on the floor so she could look him right in the eye. "He will be coming back, Sakina."
"When is the question." Sakina sighed, leaning back on her hands.
"It always seems to be when referring to time."
Sakina thought that if owls could smile, he'd be smiling right then.
"I guess so. Hey, I never got to thank you."
"For what?" The owl twisted his head.
"Letting the Gerudos take me. It's been one of the best things that ever happened to me."
The owl bowed his head. "I fear that time will be ending soon for you."
"Don't say that," Sakina sighed. "Why do you have to say that? 'Cause you know you're always right." Sakina shoved a loose tendril of hair behind her ear.
"They cannot keep a Hylian. Ganondorf knows where you are. When you're older… I don't know what his plans for you are." The owl hooted softly. "I hope you will keep your guard stringent."
Sakina nodded. "I think I have been doing okay."
"I hope you can do better. Your routine had better change."
"What? Why?" Sakina spluttered.
"It's obvious to me, your schedule and Ganondorf doubtlessly has eyes on you."
"I can't change it yet!"
"You'll be safe for awhile yet," the owl said soothingly. "He has no quarrel with a thirteen-year-old."
"He has a quarrel with me for as long as he's alive," Sakina growled through clamped teeth.
"Caution, do not throw it to the winds. Shall I take you home?" The owl changed tactic.
"I've only been here for a few moments." Sakina said.
"I think Link will emerge in the morning, not the evening." The owl explained.
"Oh." Sakina chewed on this for awhile. "Do you think he's come out already?" Terror crept into her heart. "Oh jeez! What if I've missed him?!"
"Nay, nay, he's not yet been out." The owl shook his head. "I keep watch, Miss Sakina."
"Well, I should pop in to say hello to Malon," Sakina shrugged.
"Today would be a poor day to do such things." The owl disagreed. "No, Mr. Ingo is in a foul disposition and I believe Malon must suffer his anger a day more."
Sakina's eyes burned with desired tears that she forced away. "Why do we all have to suffer?"
"I don't know. That's a very good question, but one I cannot answer."
The owl took Sakina in his talons and carried her back to the Gerudo Valley. He told her to start coming at daybreak if she hoped to see Link at all. Agreeing, she wandered back to her rooms, where a very eager Nokomis paced the room.
"Yup, you were right, Zahmora, oh my goody-goodness. Men back in the Gerudo Valley! Can you just imagine?" Nokomis stopped her frantic pacing when she noticed Sakina had entered the room with a very pensive look on her face. "Kina, you're wondering about your stuff."
"Actually…."
"We've moved it into the room at the end of the hall." Nokomis explained. "But don't worry, we'll visit you." She winked. Zahmora stood and pat Sakina lovingly on the head. Kynthia looked exasperated that she would now be rooming with the all-obnoxious Nokomis. She guided Sakina to her room simply to get away for awhile.
"Don't worry; we'll definitely be in to visit." She repeated Nokomis' words. "But the mornings you are going to have to yourself for awhile."
"Oh, well that's okay," Sakina said with apparent relief. "'Cause I have to go to the Temple in the mornings now."
"Good, good." Kynthia said absent-mindedly. Her hand was constantly adjusting her hair. There was a definite air about the Gerudos that spoke of giddiness and excitement. Sakina was the opposite to all of them, downcast and thoughtful.
Here she had allowed herself to again become attached to a group that she would be losing, just like everything else. Alone in her room, she buried her face into her pillow and released the tears. Nobody was there, so it was okay. Everyone she loved was gone. Everything lost to her.
Link… gods above, I do miss you the most. She could have sworn that he was smiling at her from behind her closed eyelids. That was when she lapsed into a dream.
"Hey Link! Let's go swimming!" They were running through the Lost Woods.
"Okay." They jumped eagerly into the small pool. Immediately the duo was soaked. They laughed and played for hours. "You know, we're going to be together forever." Link said. "Because we're different from everyone else, so we have to be."
"Yeah. Forever." They lie on the side, soaking up the warm sun from in between the towering trees above. Suddenly Sakina's body became longer and older, she was now leaning on her elbow and watching Link stare at the sky. "Forever is a long time, if you think about it."
"It is. But that's okay because we're best friends."
"I miss you," she whispered.
He turned to face her. "I miss you too." They hugged and suddenly he was no longer in her arms and she was hugging empty air. Her arms were chained around herself.
"You can hold nothing." Ganondorf whispered to her. "I will take it all away." And he poked her brand with fiery fingers. She refused to scream again. The pain was horrible but….
Sakina sat up, drenched in cold sweat. She tossed her legs out of bed. The sun was rising scarlet over the desert colossus outside. Sakina clamped her hand to her brand. It still stung. It hadn't twinged like this in years. Across from her bed was a looking glass. She saw that it was red, fading again in color. Why would it be red again? She asked herself curiously. How odd.
Tying her laces, Sakina got ready for going to the Temple alone. The training grounds were full only of women preparing to leave in droves for Kakariko. Sakina had no trouble getting by them unnoticed. Her braid trailed down her back, covering part of the scabbard of her sword. True to her word, she had cleaned her sword every night, but that couldn't keep the sand from leaving its mark on her sheath. Its beautiful markings were slowly being scraped away, it seemed. Even the grip of her sword was permanently darkened with the sweat and dirt of many uses. The hilt had abrasions that could never be lost. Sakina wasn't sure if she minded or not. In a way, the sword seemed to represent her; torn apart slowly by time and irreparable. And like it or not, that's the way it's got to be. Her Gerudo garb was becoming worn with wear and tear of the two years she had kept it.
Hyrule Field seemed a much kinder place by day. Sakina was startled by a drove of traveling deer. A small smile spread over her face. There was still life out in the land that had been touched by the fiery fingers of darkness. From the corner of her eye, she noticed a red-headed teenager riding a palomino horse.
"Malon!" She cried eagerly. The day made her feel different, more cheerful, and the sight of Malon riding made her feel free. "Malon!" She waved her arms.
Malon's mouth dropped but quickly formed a smile. When she stopped by Sakina's side, the bruising around her face was all too obvious.
"Sakina! I didn't know you came here during the day!"
"It's a new schedule."
"I ride in the mornings most days. Mr. Ingo says I have to exercise Epona for Ganondorf."
"Epona is going to Ganondorf?" Sakina said, hardly keeping the anger out of her voice.
"In a few years, yes." Malon sighed. "If only Daddy knew…."
"Don't you ever see your father anymore?"
"No. Not since he left all those years ago. Mr. Ingo won't let me visit." Malon turned to look over her shoulder. "He's watching me right now, actually. In theory. I think he may have fallen asleep, but…." Malon lowered her voice. "I wish you weren't coming out in the morning."
"I can come back at night too, if you want."
Malon's face relaxed. "Yeah, that sounds good. So, will I see you tonight?"
"I can't promise anything, but I'll try."
"Good," Malon tugged on Epona's reins gently. "Do you think… you think… that maybe… you might be able to go to Kakariko and… see my dad?"
Sakina bit her lip. "Maybe. One day."
Malon's face flushed with joy. "Okay. Good. Um… see you tonight?"
"Hopefully."
Malon spurred Epona's side and trotted away. Sakina continued to the Temple. A rain cloud seemed to relentlessly hover over the place. Sakina shivered as she darted by the ReDead and snuck into the Temple.
"Sheik," she addressed the black-clad female, "I should have known you'd be here."
"Sa… Sakina?" Sheik stood hurriedly from the floor.
"The one and only." Sakina bowed. "Do you come here every morning?"
"No. Just about once or twice a week. Sometimes less. Whenever I can get out." A bit of blonde hair was poking out of her costume.
"This may seem like a stupid thing to say," Sakina said, leaning against a wall lazily, "and I haven't met too many Sheikah, but I thought they all had white hair."
"Well, they don't." Sheik said shiftily, blue eyes moving elsewhere. "You look like a Gerudo in that."
"That's because I live with the Gerudos now." Sakina said, watching the wall with little hope.
"Oh? Couldn't you find anywhere else to stay?"
"Hm, well… no." Sakina finished bluntly. "I don't know how much your type knows about it, but Ganondorf doesn't really want me to be okay-ed anywhere."
"What do you mean?" Sheik looked back to Sakina.
Sakina tapped the brand on her neck gently and tilted it towards Sheik. "The mark of a pariah." Sakina laughed harshly. "It's hard for people to let you in when Ganondorf threatens anyone with severe punishment."
"Then why did the Gerudos let you in?" Sheik asked, frowning.
"They don't fear him, or so they say. But I'm not staying there too much longer, I guess. Their protection can only go so far." Sakina shrugged, half-wondering why she was telling Sheik so much. "How's Zelda doing?"
"Oh, she's all right. She can't exactly do much with Ganondorf on the lookout for her."
"Hah, isn't that the truth?" Sakina let out a rugged sigh. "Sometimes I wonder what any of us really has to do with this. Sure, Link is supposed to be the Hero or whatever, but is Zelda just the seer? And am I just randomly here?"
"Link is the Hero of Time," Sheik explained. "Zelda is the seer but also she holds the key to the royal family. You… your role is uncertain. Perhaps you are just the…."
"Whipping boy?" Sakina smiled wryly.
"Friend. The support." Sheik shrugged. "I told Zelda that you're still alive. She inquired as to your well-being."
"Tell her I'm doing all right." Sakina shrugged back. "She needn't worry about me. It sounds like she has her own set of problems."
Sheik wasn't sure whether Sakina was being sarcastic or sincere.
"I also told her," Sheik said more softly, "about your being her sister." The Sheikah's eyes fell down. "She wanted me to give you this." Sheik handed Sakina a ring. It was just a simple, golden band. "It was hers, but she wanted you to have it. And she's sorry," Sheik continued, "that she left you when you needed a friend most."
Sakina frowned, taking the ring. She looked at Sheik. The Sheikah female was hiding something. Sakina wasn't sure, so she didn't say anything.
"Tell her that I accept her apology," Sakina held the ring in her palm pensively. "Here," Sakina slipped an arm-circlet off. Sakina handed Sheik the golden bracelet that she had received as a gift for her twelfth birthday. "Give this to her from me. And tell her it goes on the upper arm, not the lower." Sakina had about five more, so no one would notice that one was missing. The forest-Hylian didn't want to offend the givers, but wanted Zelda to have something too.
Sheik's eyes smiled at her. "I'm sure that Zelda would thank you."
Sakina nodded.
"And… that ring went on her middle finger. In case you wanted to know." Sheik slipped out the door. Sakina inspected the ring for a moment. Inside was engraved the Triforce, a symbol Sakina was coming to hate. But she wanted to forgive Zelda, so she put the ring on. It was comfortable enough. Soon Sakina would forget that she wore it. Sheik never reappeared at the Temple when she was there.