Er, hello. ^_^; I'm really really late, I know. But I purposely made this chapter huge to make up for it! At least, I think it's huge. 0_o
Blame Chuquita for the way Goku acts toward Vegeta in this one! IT'S ALL YOUR FAULT CHU-SAMA!! …But I still luv your fics and artwork. ^_^ If you haven't read any of Chuquita's fanfics here, WHERE THE HECK HAVE YOU BEEN?! *grabs and shakes you*
Responsibility Fairy: Put them down before you give them brain damage!
Heh, right. ^_^; *puts the reader down* Ah, by the way, this is one of my many Fairies. You know that voice in the back of your head that sometimes screams at you to do your homework before you forget it? No? Maybe it's just me then… anyway, these little fairies represent all the random thoughts floating through my head. Believe me, there are a lot. 0_o
Buckets of Worms and Saiya-Go Lessons
Kris set down in front of a creek and … stared. It was relaxing, the gurgling sound of the cold water over smooth rocks, and the birds chirping lightly to each other while a group of squirrels fought over a scrap of food. It was… depressing.
She sat down abruptly, getting the back of her jeans wet on the moist ground. She didn't care. Staring at the water in front of her mindlessly, she let her thoughts wander around until they trickled away like the very water she gazed at. Only one thought refused to be dislodged.
She had majorly screwed up.
Everything. The first thing that came to mind was the recent fight with Ranu. Looking back, part of her realized that he was only trying to help her. No… her face scrunched up as she thought of what word described it.
Protect. He had been trying to protect her.
Her eyes widened considerably. Protect her? Why would he…
'Because he fucking worships you, you moron!' a self-loathing voice in her head hissed at her. She cringed outwardly, recognizing just how much she had really screwed everything up. But just as abruptly as she realized it, her apathy and rage fused together and promptly kicked regret's ass back into the deep recesses of her mind.
Her face scrunched up again, this time in an expression of fury and indignity. She glared at the birds flittering around over her head. They were too happy sounding…
Abruptly, a few burnt feathery bodies fell to the ground.
~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ .~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ .
He had managed to clean up the mess before they got home. But just barely. And it turned out, it wouldn't have mattered much anyway if he hadn't. Because almost immediately, Goku knew something was up. Though, supposedly, it was better because Chichi hadn't found out. Supposedly.
"So… what is it?"
Ranu blinked, slightly surprised. He had been taking out the garbage after dinner when Goku followed him outside into the chilly air.
"…what?" Ranu answered.
"Don't play around. What happened?"
Ranu looked sadly at the ground. His uncle had on his second most serious face. It was the one just before "I'm-gonna-beat-you-to-a-pulp" in its severe ness. Ranu's arms went limp and hung uselessly at his sides.
"It's nothing."
Goku's eyes narrowed.
"I said, don't play around. Something definitely happened. I've been smelling stress all over you since me and Goten got home today. So, what is it?"
Ranu sighed. There was no avoiding it now.
"Me and Kris had a fight. That's all… it's really nothing, I told you-"
"What about?" Goku interrupted, his face softening slightly. Ranu fidgeted nervously.
"… Kris got mad at me for ruining a prank she was going to pull… she would've gotten in trouble, but you know her, she wouldn't have cared anyway," he started, his face taking on a frustrated look at Kris's disregard for any rules whatsoever. "Anyway, she yelled at me and… I guess I got mad at her yelling, and I kinda… yelled back, I guess. Then she stormed out and slammed the door so hard it broke."
There was a pause while Ranu thought back to what had happened more deeply, and it finally sunk in what she had said.
"I told her to get out…" he whispered, head hung down in shame. "…and… she said that, if I was so tired of her, then fine. She said…. she said 'goodbye'…" he finished hoarsely.
Goku exhaled through his nose and looked up at the dark night sky, thinking.
"I suppose neither of you wants to apologize to the other first…" he sighed.
Ranu kicked a pebble guiltily.
"Figures. I let you two hang around with Vegeta too much," he grinned, remembering how Vegeta never apologized for anything and his stubbornness in that area. Even he had been proved wrong countless times; he still maintained that he was in the right…
Breaking off the thoughts of his rival, Goku looked back at Ranu, who was staring off into the nearby woods.
"You know, she's more stubborn and prideful than you are," he started. Ranu glanced up at him. "She's not going to apologize first. Heck, she may not even admit that she's in the wrong at all! She's too much like Vegeta," Goku mentally slapped himself. Enough mentioning Vegeta already! He continued after a small pause.
"… but you're the only thing she has to cling onto in this world."
Ranu started and stared questioningly at his uncle.
"Besides Vegeta, I mean. But, he's the only family she has. Unless you count Bulma, Bra, and Trunks," he quickly added. Ranu turned back to stare at the dark forest.
"… No. She doesn't count them. She's told me before, once. She's… grateful, I guess, but… she doesn't love them like family… she's even kind of distant from Vegeta-san…" Ranu said in a dull voice.
Goku nodded once. "Then, really, you're the only one who's keeping her here." Again, Ranu started and stared at him.
"Aw, come on, it's not that hard to figure out, is it?" And judging by the blank look on his nephew's face, it apparently was.
"Look, you know about what she's been through, right?" he asked.
Ranu nodded. "Most of it. What she'll tell me anyway,"
"Right. Well, think about it. She's got nowhere to go, and nowhere she belongs. I've caught her a couple times out here, just laying in the middle of the field and staring up at the sky. She thinks… no, she knows that Earth isn't her home, but she also knows that her home doesn't exist anyway. She's got nowhere to go to that she feels safe in. Except for you," he ended, pointing a finger at Ranu.
"Me?" Ranu blinked in surprise.
"You can't tell me that you haven't noticed how tense she is when someone touches her. But, she's perfectly fine when you hug her. She's even relaxed. Me and Vegeta sometimes talk… between beating the tar out of each other of course," he laughed, then sobered up again. "But… we talk about you two a lot. What he tells me about Kris… Ranu, no matter how hard everyone tries at healing the wounds in her heart, they'll always be there. But the fact is, she rejects everyone else when they even attempt to get close to her. She's closed herself up into her own protected little bubble, and no one can get in… except you."
Ranu's eyes were getting progressively wider at every sentence.
"Don't you get it? You're the pain-killer she needs to keep functioning right! She can't keep going without you there, keeping her on the right path!"
Ranu gaped openly, in shock. Since when… since when did his uncle know more about Kris than he did? When did he stop noticing things about her? Shouldn't he have picked up on it? Was she hiding it from him? Why?
Goku watched, only slightly amused at Ranu's obviously running-at-full-speed mind. He dropped one hand on Ranu's shoulder, snapping him out of the constant, increasingly frantic circle of thoughts. He smiled comfortingly at him.
"Look Ranu," he said softly. "She's going to fight you with all she's got. Because I think, unintentionally, you hurt her. You've never yelled back at her before, and it surprised her. She won't admit that you have any power over her, so, she'll use her anger and try to beat you with it. I think you hurt her by challenging her dominance, and so out of instinct and habit, she shoved you away so you can't do it again,"
He stopped Ranu before he could say it.
"I know, I know, you wouldn't hurt her. But that's not what she believes right now. You want to be friends again, right?"
Ranu nodded enthusiastically.
"Then, you've got to go out there and find her. Think of something she can't resist giving in to, and offer that as an apology. Worship her for awhile, so her scathed ego will stop trying to control her. Not too much though, or she'll end up worse than 'Geta!" he laughed.
Ranu smiled for the first time that day. He lunged forward and hugged Goku tightly, then let go and started running off, only pausing for long enough to wave and shout back a "Thanks Uncle Goku!"
Goku smiled and waved back as Ranu took off. He stood outside for awhile longer, looking at the sky.
"I wonder if I should go ask Vegeta to teach me Saiya-go one of these days…" he wondered out loud. With a naughty little chuckle he flew off in the direction of Capsule Corporation.
~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~
Ranu sniffed the air intently, trying to track Kris down through scent alone. She was hiding her ki too well for him to use that to find her. Giving the air one last sniff to confirm it, he took off towards her location.
'What… what should I say? Maybe it would be better if I just forced her to apologize?' he though while speeding past rather confused and disoriented nocturnal woodland animals. Immediately, a cynical voice in his head replied.
'Since when has forcing her to do anything worked, moron?' it sneered at him.
'It might work this time! She might be… be…'
'What?' it snarled. 'She might be broken enough to be convinced? Is that what you want, you selfish little bastard?!'
'No! I don't want that!'
'Then I suggest you think of a way around that wall of hers. Unless you'd prefer a broken mate,' it growled.
'What?!' he stopped suddenly, gaping at air. But it was too late. Having fulfilled its mission, the sneering voice drifted back into the depths of his mind with a mischievous chuckle.
'I…. I don't like her that way…' Ranu thought to himself, struggling to hold down any "inappropriate" ideas. '…..do I?' He paled in fear at the thought.
'Oh god….'
"I-I… I…" he whispered. Swallowing nervously, he opened his mouth to finish the sentence.
And abruptly closed it again with an audible click.
'I don't. She's just a friend. I like her, but I don't…' his thought trailed off, unable to even think the word. He was blushing as it was. Shaking his head to clear his thoughts, he continued running and sniffing Kris out.
~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~
Wide-eyed, Ranu stood just behind the tree line, openly staring in the direction of the creek. He found himself unable to speak.
She was floating above the water, feet just barely touching the surface. Her shoes lay discarded, melted even, on the opposite bank. Various creatures, from birds and lizards, to wolves, deer, and dinosaurs, lay burnt and decaying around the creek.
He had to cover his mouth and nose with his hand to keep the nauseating smell of burnt dead flesh at a tolerable level.
She was performing a smooth, flowing kata, obviously trying to imitate the water below her. Abruptly, she pounded the air hard and fast with intricate kicks and punches, twirling around to deliver blows on more imaginary opponents on all sides, only to quickly calm back down into the flowing graceful movements of before.
She had ripped her jeans off, and their ashy remains lay next to the ki-melted footwear. The t-shirt she wore was long enough to go down to her knees, but she had roughly torn off the sleeves and the rest of it was ripped in some places. From what, he didn't know.
To finish it, she had rescued a black leather collar from her backpack and wore it around her neck. The silver metal ring in the front glinted with the limited amount of light the stars emitted. Ranu vaguely noted somewhere in the back of his mind that he remembered both Bulma and Chichi forbidding her to buy it.
He thought she looked like a dark angel.
An unfamiliar sensation fluttered through his stomach and it brought him out of his trance. He inhaled sharply, surprised at the feeling.
Kris stopped sharply, snapping her head in his direction. He froze for a moment.
'You stupid moron!' the voice came back with a vengeance. 'Get your ass out there!' and gave him a mental shove.
It worked as well as a physical one. Ranu stumbled forward out of the protection of the trees rather ungracefully. Blushing furiously, he regained his balance and nervously scratched the back of his head, looking away.
She didn't move. Didn't turn her eyes away from him for an instant. Didn't even blink or change expression.
The creek bubbled happily along, kissing the bottom of her feet occasionally. The smell of burnt flesh and earthy scents could not be purified away by the water's clean scent. Everything stood still for long seconds that dragged their feet like recalcitrant children going to school. Nothing… moved…
'CAN YOU BE ANYMORE OF A MORON?!' it screeched. Ranu flinched unknowingly and Kris twitched. It was broken.
"Just what the hell do you want," she said in a dead-pan tone of voice. Ranu's mind felt like a dam had burst and every thought possible was rushing over him like a flash flood. He quivered uncontrollably, but made no other move.
Kris raised an eyebrow questioningly and slowly floated back to dry land and landed in front of Ranu.
"I…" he whispered, eyes hidden from her view. "I… didn't mean it."
She blinked, taken aback for a moment, before a smug smirk found its way to her lips. She opened her mouth to say another "I told ya so" and-
"You made me so angry!" Ranu yelled suddenly, but didn't raise his head. His hands clenched at his sides, useless. "I… I didn't know how to get through to you. I hadn't wanted… I never wanted to hurt you! Never!"
She stared, slowly digesting.
"Damnit Kris! Why do you have to be so… so…"
'Beautiful? Alluring? Fiery? Stubborn? Sexy?'
He sighed, and let the sentence go.
"I never wanted to hurt you. All I've ever wanted was for you to be happy and safe. But safe especially. You think I can just forget what's happened to you?! How many times when we were little that you woke up crying and I had to purr you back to sleep? Because of what happened to you back then?"
Kris's pupils dilated in alarm, but she didn't move.
"More than anything, I wanted… I wanted you to feel safe. To be safe. After all that time in a cold cell, I wanted you to feel safe and warm!" He paused, seeming to collect his thoughts.
"But, no matter how hard I try… I can't protect you from yourself. You're always trying to hurt yourself Kris. Every single time someone manages to get in past your defenses you beat yourself up and push everyone away. Why? What…" he looked up finally, staring into Kris's eyes. She noted dully, through the haze of the initial shock, that he had tears in his eyes.
"What did they do to you that made you so sad? Why won't you let me help you heal your old wounds, Kris? I just want…" he choked once, and the slight motion caused the hot salty water to pour over his cheeks. He bowed his head again.
"I only want you to be happy."
'I love you.'
"I love you, Kris."
And the world exploded.
~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~
"Vegeta!"
Vegeta snorted, slightly annoyed at the overly peppy voice, but turned his head slightly in the other man's direction as an acknowledgement.
Goku landed a couple feet away from him, and kept his distance that way. He knew that the Prince disliked physical contact, to the point of not being comfortable with anyone being within a few feet of him. It was like a bubble of security. He sometimes wondered how the heck Trunks and Bra had ever been born.
"I was wondering if we could have a light spar? Chichi's busy doin' whatever house stuff she doesn't let me do, and Goten's got a date, an' then Gohan is too busy with-"
"Enough!" barked Vegeta. "I get the point. Come on." And he led the way to the Gravity Room, even though they both knew that Goku had been there so many times he could've made it there blindfolded.
After they both stopped to take a breather, much to Vegeta's protest ("A break?! Are you going soft on me Kakarrot?") Goku decided to test the waters.
"Vegeta…"
A slight inclination of the head told him that the Prince had heard him.
"What… what was it like? Our planet, I mean,"
At this, Vegeta turned his head completely to look at him. After a few seconds of silence (that seemed to a nervous Goku more like minutes) he snorted derisively.
"What do you mean, 'our' planet? The planet was mine, Kakarrot."
"You know what I mean!" Goku exclaimed exasperatedly. Vegeta chuckled, secretly glad he had managed to get under the other Saiyan's skin, if even for a brief second. Then he sobered and his face became introspective. When he spoke, it was with a voice barely above a whisper. Goku managed to hear it anyway.
"It was bitter-sweet. Everything was useful, not like here. Everyone was always either training, eating, sleeping, or fucking each other senseless. Not that I knew much about the latter, I was still under-age when it was destroyed… there weren't that many Saiyans and the food was rich, so starvation wasn't a worry. The food here is so weak… maybe that's why all its inhabitants are pitiful," he chuckled darkly. Goku felt something pang in his heart at the sight of Vegeta sitting a few feet away from him on the floor, boring holes into a wall with his intense eyes as he recited what he remembered from his childhood. Goku absorbed every tidbit of information he could eagerly.
When Vegeta finally blinked himself out of his reverie, he glanced over at Goku and was slightly startled.
Goku's eyes were bright. No, they were always bright and shining. But this was something entirely different. The man was almost glowing with energy from his eagerness to learn more, and his eyes were fevered in a way that nearly made Vegeta scared.
"Vegeta?..." Goku whispered reverently. Vegeta desperately tried to not start at the tone of voice.
"What, Kakarrot?" he replied. Goku didn't wait for an instant.
"Would you tech me how to speak Saiya-go?"
~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~
She stumbled backwards, in shock. He did likewise, in the opposite direction, hands abruptly slapped over his own mouth. But the tears wouldn't stop coming, no matter how hard he tried, they wouldn't stop coming and the small keening sounds of a crying child wouldn't stay deep in his throat or behind his hand. No matter how he tried to hide it through shock, she could still see it there, screaming at her in its severity.
Fear.
He was afraid. She could smell it on him, even through the smoky scent of burnt fur and flesh surrounding them. He was terrified beyond all reason at that moment, and for the life of her, she couldn't figure out why! The only thing she was capable of doing was staring openly back at his trembling form as his legs threatened to collapse under the stress and adrenalin.
Abruptly, the shock in his eyes wore off and the fear faded away. What replaced it, however, was far more terrifying to Kris.
Deep in his eyes, through all the water that spilled down his face, a soul-wrenching sadness swept through his small frame. It wouldn't have been so bad, if he had only understood why it hurt so badly to say that word to her. It was only a word, right? Like "dog" or "book". It could be written down and spelled out and defined like every other word, so why did this one hurt so much more? His legs abruptly gave out and he collapsed onto the forest floor, hands still firmly clamped over his mouth.
Had he not been distracted by his own pain, he would have noticed a change in Kris that was taking place.
Here was her only and best friend, on his knees in the mud, crying, after having confessed his love to her. She had no idea of what to do. Nothing had prepared her for this in her entire young life, and now it was thrust on her because of… a bucket of worms? If she had had the sense of mind to do so, she would've slapped herself in the forehead.
She had hurt him.
That thought kept echoing around in her mind, over and over. No matter how often she called him an idiot and hit him over the head and abused him, she had never hurt him this badly. Never. And now he was practically broken over a fucking bucket of worms.
Kris bared her teeth in frustration and anger at herself. Gathering up what will-power she had left, she rammed herself into the mental wall of cold indifference whose purpose it had been to keep her safe. It crumbled with some difficulty, and abruptly she found herself kneeling beside Ranu and holding onto him for dear life.
~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~
"And what's that?"
"Ah… ah… i-chi-noh-se?"
"Good. You finally got it."
Goku grinned weakly at the slight praise and yawned, rubbing at his eyes. Vegeta took note of it and decided to call it a day. Even though it was near midnight.
"That's enough for now Kakarrot. Go home and get some sleep. We'll continue tomorrow," he said, turning to exit the room.
A loud thump made him turn back around. There, on the floor, was an unconscious Goku. Vegeta rolled his eyes at the younger Saiyan's prone form.
"He couldn't have waited until he got home. He had to faint right in the middle of my training room. How like him," he muttered to himself, stalking over to Goku and picking him up, maneuvering the larger Saiyan until he was carrying him on his back. Still grumbling, he carried him out of the room and into one the spare bedrooms the building had.
Just as Vegeta was about to drop the unconscious man onto the mattress, Goku's body decided it liked being attached to Vegeta's back far too much to let go and be deposited on a cold unfamiliar bed. Vegeta's left eyelid twitched in annoyance.
'You're kidding me,' he thought. 'This is not happening. Kakarrot is not clinging to me in his sleep like a… a… plush animal!'
But despite the Prince's denial of it, it was indeed happening. What made it worse was that Goku was smiling in his sleep and nuzzling Vegeta's back.
Vegeta twitched and his face turned several varying shades, from red to blue to green to white. Finally settling on a light pink (unbeknownst to the Saiyan Prince, who would have been infuriated at his own body for even producing such a color) Vegeta snarled silently to himself in frustration at being unable to pry off the slumbering Saiyan, and finally relented, exhaustion starting to creep up on him.
'Fine,' he mentally spat. 'That's just fine. If the moron wants to cling to me like a brat, then let him. I don't care!'
With that, he stalked out of the room and into his own. He'd be damned if he would change sleeping locations just because he was… inconvenienced. Even if he did have to flop down onto his bed sideways to avoid being crushed by the large Saiyan.
Goku smiled even more in his sleep and unconsciously cuddled closer to the slumbering Prince.
~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~ . ~
Blame Chu-sama. She made me do it! *points finger accusingly*
Anyway, I'm not going to apologize if you took this as shonen-ai and didn't like it. In fact, I hope it disgusted and disturbed you. Because that's how I get my kicks, sucker. ;)
But really, I doubt I'll be updating this story very often. It's sort of a pet story now. I'm not sure how to end it, and I don't think I want to. It'll be continually added to and will probably grow to an unruly size. But it's a nice way to keep track of how much my skill as a writer has progressed. ^_^
I'm more of a poet than anything else. I suck at drawing. ^_^;
If you felt that Kris and Ranu's conflict hasn't been completely resolved yet, then you're right. Its not over by a long-shot. I do have rough plans as to a future plot, but it jumps so far into their future it seems… premature.
Review please. Or I shall be extremely sad and fall into a deep depression. L