Last Episode, DIB DISAPPEARED FOR PLOT AND WRITER'S CONVINENCE. WHAT WILL OUR IRKEN INVADER DO NOW?
Our favorite boner inducing sex magnet Irken INVADER (snerk, giggle) was in a dilemna. Which we cannot spell. His bestest enemy, the Dib had been swallowed up by a magic trap door. In a fit of panic, Zim yelled the first thing his PAK came up with. "WHY WASN'T YOUR BIG HEAD BIGGER SO IT'D GET STUCK WHILE DROPPING DOWN THE DOOR IN THE FLOOR THINGIE?"
It didn't sound very smart. And it also alerted something horrible to where Zim was. Something... HORRIBLE. And also completely random. Anyway, it jumped out from behind a boulder and yelled. "OOGA BOOGA BOOGA!"
Zim screamed Courage-esquely and pointed at the fur-beast dramatically. "DON'T GET NEAR ME FUR-BEAST FILLED WITH AVACADO!"
"GRRAWRGH EEERGH GEOOOOO." replied the Thing which hacked up avacado strangely enough.
Zim stopped screaming to stare at the avacado bits for a moment. Time seemed to stop and all that happened was avacado staring. Then Zim remembered what the hell was going on and started screaming again. Backing up in horror, he accidently pushed on the wall he was against and fell down to his dooooooooooom all the while screaming, "(UR53 J00 )18!!1111"
Surprisingly, the land wasn't painful, but the swift kick to the stomach Zim recieved hurt enough for two painful landings. "AUGH. Zim, get off!" Dib whimpered. "Uhn..." He held up his heavy head as if he just woke up from a painful sleep. "Has... anything happened?" he asked Zim.
The Zim glared at the Dib while clutching his hurt SUPERIOR stomach area and yelled unnecessarily again. "A FLITHY HAIR BEAST ATTACKED ME... AND IT SPAT OUT AVACADO!"
All Zim recieved was a weirded out look. "... And people call me crazy. Hey, what's that over there?" A finger was pointed ever so steady toward a darkened area.
"I do not know" was Zim's ever so snooty reply.
"... Fine. I'll find out myself." Briskly Dib kicked himself up and made his way toward the shadows, strutting all macho and
stuffs. What a boner head. I mean bone head. I mean, oh never mind! This just an excuse to up the word count in this chapter.
While the boy wonder's ass moved as he walked almost effeminately, the mostly pure eyes of the magenta eyed Irken never left their swaying movement. And then, Zim felt his temperture and blood pressure drop again, making him dizzy and tired. "Hurry up Dib human!"
Glancing behind paranoidly, Dib yelled, "Will you be quiet? GEH!" he batted at some cobwebs that decided his hair was a good home.
Looking up from his ass watching to seeing his archnemesis fight cobwebs amused Zim. And he let Dib know with his maniacal laughter, which was interupted with a lot of coughing.
The muscles in Dib's face contorted into a frown and than changed to an awestruck oh when he saw a lever. "Hey! What's this?" Lacking common sense, Dib went and pulled on the lever (hehehe...), which thrusted him backwards straight into Zim. The room started changing and taking a look which obviously wasn't natvie to this planet.
You could barely hear Zim's muffled screams from having the Dib's sudden weight upon him. He was all squisheded. Who says squisheded isn't a word? WELL IN THIS FIC IT IS!
Once the pressure in the room calmed and it was normal, Dib fell, and rolled on the ground. He started grabbing things aimlessly so he could get up. What he grabbed was Zim. And what Dib received instead of the sexual healin' he needed was a nice big slap from a panting Zim. No you pervs, he wasn't panting because of that, when you've had a tall teenage male fall on top of you, it's going to knock out your air, no matter how skinny he is. "FLITHY... DIB MONSTER..."
By this time, Dib's acne plagued face was red as santa's suit. "WHAT!? I couldn't get up!" And then his face went from embarassed, to amazed, his mouth hanging open in awe. "... WOW. It's a- it's a- .... hey! It kinda looks like your underground base."
A quick look around the scenery and Zim made a snorting noise, even though his face was still noseless."Pitiful hyuman. It is not NEARLY as great as Zim's base."
Always having to challenge Zim, Dib argued. "Are you kidding? This is way better than yours! I mean, do you have a tank full of bubbling goo? Well? Do you?"
"Yes. I put you in it once."
"But that was techinically in space" Ah... The struggle for dominance between males.
"And your head is always up your flithy earth hole." Getting the upper hand in the fight, Zim sneered.
"Don't you think that's a bit obscene?" Dib had lost interest in this fight and started observing the now apparently ruined lab. His eyes wandered back to Zim, and the Irken was getting worse physically it seemed. Zim's once bright emerald skin and dulled down into a sickly pale green. Bags started to form under the Irken's eyes, which was strange because through his research, Dib had figured out Irkens needed no sleep.
The alien shivered. "It's getting colder Dib."
With a touch of concern barely hidden from his face, Dib frowned at the green skinned menace. "Um. Well... I'm not too sure how to get out of here..."
"Figure it out, you got us in here!" Despite his yelling, Zim moved closer to the Dib thing because of the heat his big head was radiating.
"Um..." Shifting himself away from Zim, Dib tried as hard as he could to look inconspicuous while doing so:: Two brains are better than one, Zim! We must work together on this!"
"US? WORK TOGETHER? COMBINING INTO ONE? Flithy Dib human, get those perverse imaginings of your big head out. It simply will not work." Once again, Zim did not realize what he was insinuating. How predictable. What a stupid guy.
Standing there with a questioning look at Zim, Dib tried to figure out whether Zim knows what he's implying or not. "Oh, c'mon! Would you rather freeze to death down here?! Fine, just fine! If
that's the way you so choose, then stay!" And with that, Dib marched off through possibly the darkest opening.