Disclaimer: Rurouni Kenshin is copyright of it's own respected owners. I am merely a fan.

AN: I am sooooooooo sorry I took forever to update, but my schedule has been really hectic. I've been busy with school, cross country, s.a.t classes and so on. I'll try to update more often from now. Thank you to everyone for their motivation and support. Oh and sorry for any spelling/grammar mistakes -_-;;

The Fire within Ice

Chapter 6: Confessions of the Broken Heart

Days were becoming like the same passing song, slow irritating music replaying in her ears. She hadn't seen Aoshi at all, and the fact was disturbing her. The pain in her shoulder was seeming non-existent even though it had only been healing for 3 days. There had been no news of the enemy, or even if there was, she knew she was the last to hear it. Okashira...the word doesn't seem to mean much anymore.

Rasing her arms for a quick stretch, she got ready to leave her room. She knew she had to talk to Aoshi, but it still seemed almost impossible. The last words she had said to him were confession of love. It doesn't matter Misao. He thinks of you as a child. But than she remembered his words. He had told her that he saw her as a woman now. Still...he would never love me. And again she remembered his kiss; felt it. It still burned her like it had at the first moment, and she wasn't sure if she had dreamed it. Maybe Even imagined the whole thing. But she also knew that a mere kiss didn't mean love no matter how much she wanted it to. And she knew that she had a duty as the Okashira. She had to keep informed, and the only person who knew every detail was Aoshi. Even if that reason didn't seem to matter much at the time, she made a an excuse for her mind. With all the haphazard thoughts and emotions, she left her room, in search of the man that never stopped plaguing her mind and heart.

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With his arms and legs crossed, he attempted to relax and meditate again. The daily task seemed more difficult than ever...especially since Misao's image never left his eyes. He missed her bringing him his tea for all reasons ranging from her bright smile, to the pure blissful image she presented. He missed her cherry blossom scent filling the temple, or her soft sensual voice that at times seemed seductive to his ears. And he blamed himself for everything. His blamed himself for making her cry, for not protecting her enough, and even for kissing her. He wasn't exactly sure what had possesed him at the time to do so... was it her words of love from before? He wasn't sure. But he knew it was addictive. He knew he had had loved the feek of her lips, even if it was brief...and he felt ashamed. Not of her! Never of her of course. It was of himself for he felt tainted. He felt as though blood stained his soul as much as the Battousi. He couldn't understand why she would ever love him. He didn't deserve her love no matter how much he desired it...no matter how much he wanted-no, needed to return it. He didn't want to taint her pure soul with his. All he wished was that she would just vanish from his thoughts if not from his heart. Yet the thoughts would always stay, reminding him of the curiosity of need towards her. His lust making him wonder how her naked flesh would feel under his...how his name would sound on her lips in times of ecstasy. And love, making him ache to have her with him always, to protect her, to make her smile at him forever,,, How did the child he had held in his arms years ago have him in such state of vulnerability?

He knew he had never felt this way towards anyone. There had always been respect for his comrades, anger and hate for his enemies, and need for revenge and power. He knew there had never been love in the way he felt for her. She was strong, passionate, and even fierce. His few affairs with other women had only been brief sexual interactions that seemed meaningless. Yet with Misao, he wanted to take everything from her, and give her everything in return. She burned through his senses and that is exactly why he tried to avoid her. He had only visited her while she slept to make sure her wound was healing fine.

Again he tried to ignore his thoughts, but he couldn't help wondering when he would talk to her again. And with that last though, a knock on the temple door reached his ears, followed by Misao's figure entering his field of vision.

"Aoshi-sama" She said, her voice shaky and almost mute.

All he could do was nod to acknowledge her presence for his voice seemed non-existent. And with that motion, Misao came closer, sitting across him, yet not looking at him at all.

"I wanted to thank you for saving me few days ago." She hesitated. "I also wanted to ask you any information you have found out about the enemy during my absence." Her head kept down, waiting for him to say something.

"I didn't do much to save you Misao. The enemy apparently knows the Oniwaban group, or s being guided by someone who does. The main person behind this all is Ginta Osada." He replied in his usual tone.

"Ginta Osada? The rich business man living in Tokyo?" She raised her head, finally looking him in the eyes, her own storming. "Do we have any sources?"

"I had contact with Saitou and all I got was that Ginta Osada is a suspect by the government, but they do not have enough information on him. But I know why he has an interest in us... revenge."

"Revenge? Ok, i have to admit I did rob one of Osada's men once, but I didn't really do much damage to the guy. i mean ok, maybe just a broken leg or two, but it was nothing he wouldn't live fro-"

"Misao. Ginta Osada is the step brother of Kanryu." Aoshi cut her off, his strong form looking broken at the mention of the man that had killed his best men. And with that, Misao's went silent with a look of horror, till she looked at him once again.

Her eyes clamed down compassionately, knowing the pain he must have felt. She had known those men as well, even if at the tim she was only a little girl. "You know, it wasn't your fault. They are still with us, and they will never blame you."

He knew what she meant, and the words burned like the fire of her meaning. As his eyes focused on the floor, he suddenly felt the soft touch of Misao's hand on his cheek, offering to him again what he kept denying. Her love. He put his own hand over hers and brought it down. "Misao" But she instantly stopped him.

"Aoshi-sama, I know you don't love me the way I love you. But I don't care anymore. I can't stop my feelings even if I wanted to. And I don't. I don't want to stop. I will always love you and always wait till I see your smile. Even with my fathers wish for my marriage, I will not for I can not live with a man for it would be only my body present, and my soul and heart in your hand. And no matter what, I will never blame you. Never." Her eyes because watery again, even though she had promised herself not to cry, not to let him see her cry. "I-I know I don't deserve-"

He cut her words of by holding her quickly, hugging her form to his . His restraints were broken for it was too much. "Misao. Why can't you understand. Your deserve everything in this world. It's me that doesn't deserve you...can't you see the blood on my hands and death on my shoulders."

She quickly pulled herself out of his arms in anger of his words. How could he say such things? "NO! You are the one not understanding. I don't care about the blood...I don't care about the past. I except that it's a part of you-will always be a part of you...but so can the future. Why don't you look to now, and not the past..."

In that moment, his lips took hers as to take, to devour and make his. It was passionate and yet more of need, giving answers to questions never asked, taking her breath. She wanted him, and that's all that mattered. She was real just as her love, and she offered it to him unconditionally. So now he took it, wanting her to be his always and forever. And as their lips broke, she could only manage to whisper his name.

"Misao. I am sorry. I don't know when you caught my heart, but I'm guessing it was sometime after I saw the blossoming 16 year old, in search of me. Never think I didn't love you in return, I was just too much of a fool accept it myself."

All she could do was stay in his arms, nesting her head in the crook of his neck, trying to convince herself she wasn't dreaming. Her eyes stinged with tears, and she had never been so happy in her whole life, even if it was for a short time. For as minutes passed by, a third voice familiar voice was heard to them both.

"How very touching Aoshi Shinimori." Jin spat out, standing to the side of the door. "I came here to talk to you, but I didn't expect to see your lovely wife here as well. Or maybe I should call her the leader, or maybe my dear Misao-chan."

Aoshi quickly stood up, looking at the man he hadn't seen since Misao's childhood. "Jin" saying the word that went through Misao's mind at the same time.

"So Okashira Misao, who would have thought. Too bad I missed it. I was too busy enjoying my time off." Jin said, looking from Misao's now standing figure to Aoshi. "It really has been a long time."

"So it was you the whole time. You were the one who knew how to get avoid our spies, and get to our location. You left the Oniwaban by your own choice those many years ago. Why? Are you now Osada's slave? Have you lost your respect?" Misao said harshly.

"RESPECT? How can you talk about respect when our precious leader killed Youji!! He was only 12 years old! Only 4 years younger than both of us Aoshi." Jin Shouted. "Or maybe you have forgotten."

"Youji? You must be the one who has forgotten. You didn't take your brother with you when you left. Youji was killed, but not by my hands. He was killed by the men of Kanryu" Aoshi replied.

"Why such lies? The man you speech of was an opium dealer, it makes no sense."

"Oh that you really are Osada's puppet. Maybe you didn't know that Kanryu was the one that murdered Hannya, Beshimi, Hyotoko and Shikijou. Maybe you didn't know that Ginta is his relation!"

"That can't be. I won't believe. And for my revenge, I will kill you with pleasure, Okashira." With that said, he took out his sword. "I am however a man of honor and will only order my men to attack after our fight to capture dear little Misao-chan."

Aoshi reached out for his twin Kodachi's, telling Misao with is eyes to step back as she took on a look of fright. "As you wish. Since you are eager to have your blood spilled, than I will not hesitate to do it."

Misao watched as both men got into fighting position, and the dream she had been in minutes ago, had turned into a nightmare. She had finally got Aoshi's love, she was sure she didn't want to lose it.

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****Keep reviewing everyone. Next Chapter: Understanding of Betrayal